good morning/afternoon/evening!

it's my birthday! and i treated myself to infinity war because apparently i hate myself-

jk jk jk, but honestly, rewatching it again was an experience. i didn't cry as hard as i did the first time round, but you can bet those character deaths hit me hard-

i'm kind of drained after watching it because it is such a depressing ending, so forgive me if i ramble a little-

i would act smart and say i've made observations but...i'm in too much pain.

let me just say, loki still has the dumbest death imaginable and i curled into a ball and turned away from the screen when thanos choked him. i hate it. i hate the russo's because of it. loki deserved BETTER, or like, to not die at all.

the tea is that thor is my favourite character in this film, easily. tony is still my number one but thor, he just deserves the world. he calls rocket 'sweet rabbit' for GODS SAKE-

starmora is still The OTP and i will strongly disagree with anyone who says otherwise-
like, i know they're dead but, that's not the point- that starmora kiss killed me and bought me back to life.

and when quill found out gamora was dead...my mum was so angry at quill for lashing out at thanos lmao. rewatching it i see why every one was pissed at him. equally, my boy has emotions. and chris pratt is the love of my life-

the most painful part for me is tied between:

-tony getting shanked by a sword and giving me a heart attack-

-or peter tumbling into tony's arms whilst crying out his name

the worst part is that i knew both of the things were going to happen, but it still ACHED. i couldn't have prepared myself for that pain if i had tried.

the ending is so much worse when you know it's about to happen? when it snaps back to thor, and thanos disappears, and then it goes to steve, you're just sat there waiting for bucky to stumble into frame and whisper a pitiful 'steve?' before becoming dust and that isn't okAY-

peter's death is still the most heart wrenching and you can't convince me other wise-

the major gripe i have with this film is that i just prefer the space team to the wakanda team. the final act where it kept switching from different locations really irritated me because i'm in a constant state of fear for tony's life, i need to know he's okay at all times-

at the same time, completely going against my first complaint, i feel like i didn't see enough of steve. like, steve owned my ass the moment his silhouette appeared. and then i felt cheated whenever the camera left him-

this film is so draining. it's like thanos stabbed me tbh.

anywho, i need hype for avengers 4 immediately-

(thank u for all the sweet birthday wishes, u all deserve the world x)