after getting bidded on by mrs edna for $500, cole joined jackie and i back at the walter cider cart, cleaning up the orange peels and spilled cider.

grace let her hands slam down on the counter, "hey! skylar's saving us a spot at monty's. im starving." she let the last word drag out and sent her pupils up to the clouds.

i had not seen the girl since she had run off in the middle of bidding, screaming that she was going to find an atm.

"i could go for some pizza." cole appeared in between jackie and i, all three of us now peering out of the window of the cart. his job was to sweep around the place, but he dropped his broom to the side.

"you... wanna hang." grace spoke slowly, "with us?"

cole smirked, and while doing it so quickly, i almost missed his eyes flickering over at mine.

"she means the more the merrier." jackie nodded, and leaned in front of cole to catch my eyes, "harps? you down?"

i let my eyes show my disgust. even when cole turned his head my way, his nose just inches from my own. close enough to see that the breath caught in my lungs, but i forced it out in a groan.

"cmon, harper gray," he leaned back as far as he could, but gripped the counter in an effort to stretch out his arms, "have some fun."

and again, his dashing smile was thrown over my way.

you did not just call him dashing, i scolded myself, no way.

but jackie was smiling at me too, and grace was sending me certain eyes, one i couldnt read the expression of.

convincing myself that the only reason i was going was to get more out of school hours for my GoPP, and that cole's glance in no way communicated that he had cared if i showed, i forced out another groan for good measure, and said "yes."

i, at least, wouldnt let myself act like there was something inside, poking at me, making me wanted to go.

it was already dark by the time we finally got a seat at monty's pizza.

i was so hungry, after skipping lunch for the homecoming huddle, that the smell of pizza grease and tomato sauce had begun to make me nauseous.

"finally," jackie huffed, sitting down and picking up a menu, "im starved." i nodded in agreement and looked over the menu with her, leaning my head on her shoulder out of fatique.

surprisingly, cole hadnt even shown up yet. with his afternoon with mrs edna being right after the huddle, we had told him we would stay at monty's until his arrival. but now, the wait for our table being hours after our arrival, he had shown up just as we had ordered our drinks. i believe i had heard him promise to help jackie finish and pick up the walter cart tomorrow afternoon, after some game they all were going to, but alex helped us pick up just a few things before we left the town square. to help make tomorrow's load a bit lighter.

i felt myself getting woozy as cole finally walked into the pizza shop. grace had been right all these years, my body would literally rather pass out then to not say something judgmental, or force my usual grunt, toward a walter. but with the lack of food in my body producing the lack of an ability to do so, all i could do was stare.

he found us over to the side, and sent a hand up, heading over.

i had failed to notice that the cheerleading squad was here, but realized upon erin collins, stopping cole in his tracks.

i tried to keep my eyes off of them, immediately feeling like it was a private conversation. the teens talking quietly to each other, erin looking pissed and cole looking like he was trying to brush something off. play it cool.

erin stepped forward, grabbing one of his arms. she was asking for something. but cole threw a lazy smile her way, and shook his head.

and walked right past erin collins.

i tried to look away, again, before my jaw dropped.

"'sup, ladies." he said as he sat down, "skylar." he nodded towards the only boy.

i tried to avoid erins eyes, either shocked or glaring over at us. somehow, i saw both in her eyes. soon, she spun on her heels, grabbed one of her girls arms instead, and the cheer team left monty's.

once i had gotten food in my system, the night got a lot better. of course, everyone else at the table had gotten along pretty well. skylar, knowing grace and jackie, and jackie knowing the walter boys.

i just knew jackie, so the pit in my stomach turned into dread as the hunger subsided.

but, everyone made an effort to include me. and even when i was just listening, to grace talk about some new drama i hadnt heard yet, or talk about some memories from past years i wasnt apart of, i just listened. and it was nice.

nice to be apart of something for once. nice to feel included, wanted. appreciated.

i never wanted to put myself in these situations for fear of feeling the opposite way. but this felt good.

i guess it wouldnt just be the walters that would surprise me today.

it would also be myself.

"hello?" i groggily answered the phone, sweeping my hair out of my face.

i glanced over at the small clock besides my bed, and almost screamed at the time. it was 1pm. staying at monty's last night till about nine, with only a few slices of pizza in my system, i had felt the day pulling me down like an added force of gravity. dropped grace off at her place, not getting a word in against her monologue of shock and glee from today's multiple hour long hang with two of the walter boys.

i yawned as she hopped out of the car, skipping to her front porch, and seemed to yawn all the way until my head hit the pillow. and i barely remembered that.

"cole didnt show to help with the cider cart." i rolled my eyes as i downed some water from the glass next to my bed, who knows how old it was. i honestly felt hung over, and i had never been so in my life.

"i know, i know," jackie spoke before i could, "why are we shocked." i nodded like a proud mom.

"exactly." i concluded, "im on my way."

"really?" jackie's voice squeaked, and there was silence in the line, "that didnt take much at all."

i tilted my head.

she was right. i had just voluntarily asked to do something walter related. why had i done that?

"dont make me change my mind," i said tauntingly, choosing not to think about it, and getting up to lace my converse, "i'll be there in twenty."

in an effort to make myself feel better, i came up with some excuses.

like, its not like a walter would be there, right?

with alex not being able to come, and cole ditching.

wrong. i forgot about the fact that a sense of responsibility and dedication to anything lacked in the walter family. 

thats why i found it funny as alex walter, fresh from skipping practice, said, "cole isnt necessarily the poster child for dependability." his arms waved back a trailer for the cart, and i tried to hide my snort the best i could, "easy. easy. a little more-"

"alex!" danny's head shot out from the driver side window, "if you keep talking to me like one of your horses, youre walking home."

i let out a shocked laugh, and sent raised eyebrows over to the oldest walter boy. he just smirked over at me, and i sent an approving nod.

danny had just become my favorite walter.

as jackie and alex hooked and rolled the cart into the trailer, i sat shotgun next to danny, not having anywhere else to hang for the moment.

"we're all heading back to the house for the rest of the day," jackie appeared at my window, "mr and mrs walter are probably still at parker's game, along with the other boys," she sent me a knowing look, telling me everything she could to help the next sentence sound enticing, "wanna come hang? i need some help with calc."

being two grades above her, i was in calculus. and i had been doing pretty well, so i agreed. a walterless house, and more hours on my GoPP form, sounded like a nice enough afternoon.

jackie had hopped in the car with alex, and i uncomfortably changed my seating position in the passenger seat of danny's truck. realizing this was my first time completely alone with a walter brother.

as he tapped a beat on the steering wheel, bouncing his eyes from the road in front of him to alex's car behind him, making sure they were still following him, i heard him muttering something.

"huh?" i said, but by his reaction to my words, i realized he hadnt been talking to me. he jumped in his chair.

"oh, sorry." he squirmed, "i was just going through lines. i hadnt noticed i was doing it out loud."

danny was president of the theatre club at school, and had been in every play they showed. if not the role, another major part. rumor had it, he was always phenomenal.

"what plays up next?" i asked, sipping from one of the last cider's the walter cart had to offer.

"romeo and juliet." i was thankful danny was back to looking out the window so he didnt see my shoulder shrink in a sigh.

how fitting. just as dramatic as this town.

"what?" he mustve took my silence as the same reaction, "would you rather another Shakespearian drama?" he smiled over at me, "like the merry wives of windsor?" his eyebrows rose in shock with mine, but his was more mocking my own, true, shock.

he had remembered. just like when he had known my name the other day, his memory and attention to detail surprised me.

"something not so..." i cringed, "expected. i guess." suddenly, i didnt want to hurt the boys feelings. danny was different, danny showed people he cared about them. i had felt it.

he just laughed, "yeah, i get it." he nodded, "but i love a good shakespeare write." he looked down at his lap, "and if i get the role, i would put my own twist on it." he smiled back up at me, "hopefully make it a bit less expected." he held my gaze for a second, "you should come see it."

"okay." the quick word almost brought a gasp out of my own mouth, but i sealed my lips tight before i could.

i tore my eyes away from his. i had already been looking too long.

what are you doing? i scolded myself, agreeing to another walter event so easily? what is wrong with you?

i had already gone too far with the walter boys. i didnt want to ever get close to one, never mind promise them something.

and though danny was purer, he was full of the same blood. the same breed of drama. hormones. and horror.

i decided to promise myself that even by the time of auditions, all of this would be forgotten.

two hours into studying for calc, my phone rang at the same time a certain truck pulled up the walter's long drive way.

"perfect, thats grace." i said, flipping the phone over to prove my right, "she probably wants to hang." i said, satisfied.

if that was the walter's truck, i would want to get out of here anyway.

i picked up, and jackie and i shifted ourselves to look out the window.

"hot take of the afternoon," her gossiping voice rang through the phone, and jackie's eyes perked up as she must have been able to hear her, "you still with jackie?" i shook my head, but smiling, put the girl on speaker.

outside held just cole coming out of his truck, and parker walter walking towards him from the front porch. the walter family had already been home, we must have been too deep into our calculus problems to hear the racket of them entering.

parker had a light blue jersey in her hands, and tears smudging two black lines under each of her eyes.

"ok, hit us." i said, looking over to see a frown covering jackie's face as she watched the scene below. i watched, not as aware as to what was going down.

"cole and erin broke up this morning." grace's voice tore through the silence of jackie's room, and our eyes met each others. my lips parted, and jackie just showed the shock in her eyes, "like, for good, apparently."

down below, parker threw the jersey at the boy before her, who looked utterly defeated at the moment, and ran off crying.

"rough day for the boy." i said, monotone.

it had clicked in my head that if he hadnt shown to help out jackie this afternoon, all signs pointed to him most likely missing parker's game this morning as well. and, mustve been with erin that whole time.

now, the boy stood at the steps, picking up the jersey now crumbled at his feet. obviously sad, and newly single.

he looked up at jackie's window, and i sneaked a look over at her instead of down at him.

her frown turned into a scowl, and she reached to close the blinds.

through the thin, white fabric, i caught cole's gaze still pointed up at us. but by the time jackie walked me down, cole was gone.