Shit's about to go down.

Our ship's about to go down. :-(

  »»————- ☆ ————-««

( six. only words bleed )

»»————- ☆ ————-««

Everything was a mess. Bodies laid unmoving on the floor. Shards of glass were scattered and debris littered everywhere. People were shaking, trembling, and crying while rushing to get out of the burning building.

Natasha was trying her best to help out, even though the outside wasn't really as much as safe at all inside. Whoever did cause the explosion must still be out there, and whoever did this is most likely to suffer the consequences.

Bubbling rage started to rise within her. Now a lot of more innocent people died. 

Who the hell would dare target a United Nations panel meeting? It absolutely makes no sense. At all.

After about an hour, she quickly exited the building. She looked down at her clothes, and her hair, and her face. She felt sticky and dirty. She was covered in grime and sweat. Dark circles started to form beneath her eyes, and she felt like her arms were going to fall off from her shoulders. She was tired. Very tired.

She pulled out to check her phone, remembering that she turned it off for the sake of the meeting. Once the screen lit up, the notifications immediately started popping out.

(6) missed calls from Steve 🖤

"Shit." She cursed, promptly hearing Steve's voice in her head to watch her language. She rolled her eyes at the reminder. He really was a modest dork.

She was about to press the call button when she noticed T'Challa sitting alone on a bench nearby; contemplated whether this was a good time to approach him and send her condolences or not. Deciding to put up a strong facade, she picked the former.

She sat on the other bench. Carefully choosing the right words, she started with the most common thing to say, "I'm very sorry." 

T'Challa turned to her. And she noticed the way he fiddled with the silver band in his hands. 

"In my country," He started, voice skimmed with an emotion she couldn't fully get a grasp of. "death is not the end. It's more of a stepping-off point. You reach out with both hands and Bast and Sekhmet, they lead you into the green veldt... where you can run forever."

She nodded, forcing a weak smile. "That sounds very peaceful."

"My father thought so." He asserted, putting on the ring around his finger. His face suddenly darkened, eyes holding a cloud dimming over his irises. "I am not my father."

This conversation was heading to exactly where she didn't want them to go. "T'Challa.. task force will decide who brings in Barnes." she convinced.

He stood up. "Don't bother, Miss Romanoff." Clenching both his fights tightly, he declared, "I'll kill him myself."

She could do nothing but watch him walk away. Hatred and vengeance radiated off him. Her thoughts were cut off when she felt her phone vibrate. As soon as she saw the caller, a wave of relief rushed past her. Considering everything that happened today, she desperately needed to hear his voice.

"Steve," she muttered, answering on the second ring.

"I've been calling you since I heard what happened." He said, voice sounding relieved yet worrying at the same time. "Are you okay?"

Unconsciously, her fingers went up to grasp the necklace lying around her neck. It was the necklace he gave her. She was always wearing this wherever she was; wherever she went to, she would always take a part of him with her. It was what she leaned on for strength. She never once took it off.

Her fingers curled around it tightly. "Yeah, I got lucky. Sorry, I hadn't returned your calls. Things have been a little... out of control." She said, sighing. She wasn't sure if she had heard him correctly. "You said you knew what happened?"

"I saw it on the news. It didn't look good." He said. And she could picture him watching the TV screen with disapproval and disbelief at the same time. His blue eyes sketching a dark ocean over the usual bright sky. "I'm just glad you're alright," he added.

Though, she strongly suspected the strain in his voice. Natasha knew him well enough to know if something was wrong. It could only mean that he was planning something stupid or something dangerous. 

Which were the options that they do not need right now.

And since you-know-who was dragged into this mess...

"Steve," She already knew his other reasons for being here. Other than making sure she was alright, there was still another reason. She was two steps ahead of him for figuring that out. "I know what you're thinking."

"What?" he asked, feigning innocence. "I'm not doing anything."

She felt his presence grow in the area. And now she was sure that he was somewhere nearby as she could practically feel him watching her every move. She couldn't see him, but she knew that he could see her.

Things were going to get so much worse than it is if Steve did what he wanted to do. "Look, I know how much James means to you. I really do." She abruptly said. And she tried hard not to think about the unsettled discussion they were supposed to have regarding him. Regarding her past. Regarding her and James. With that in mind, she felt the weight on her shoulders increased a hell more. "I'm asking this for your sake and his. Please, Steve, stay out of this."

Silence answered her.

When he didn't utter a word, she jerked her head in every side to try and get a glimpse of him—  wherever he was. "Where are you? Wait for me—"

"Why?" He interjected, coldly, 

"You'll only make this worse for all of us." 

"Are you saying you'll arrest me?" Steve taunted, tone turning sharper. She heard the pain behind his words.

She quickly shook her head, knowing he could see her from a distance. "No, no. God, of course not." She gripped her phone tightly. How was she going to explain this without sounding like she was so against him? Or turning her back on him? 

But there was no better way to say it. She couldn't sugarcoat the words even if she wanted to. She went with being blunt, knowing it was the only way this conversation could ever work. "But someone would, and I don't want that to happen. If you interfere, that's how it works now," she explained.

"If he's this far gone, Nat, I should be the one to bring him in." He reasoned, sneaking a look at her who was standing not far from where he was.

Steve knew it wasn't fair to her. That they just recently made up and now he's starting to give her a reason to be so pissed off at him. He knew it within himself that she's the only one keeping him from breaking down, and he felt pathetic that this is what he was doing in return for that.

Natasha meant a lot to him.

But Bucky does too.

And he needed to do everything to get him back home. Not when he was this close to giving him a second chance at having a peaceful life again.

"Why?" She asked, sounding disappointed.

"Because I'm the one least likely to die trying," he stated.

"Steve, don't. Please." 

"I'm sorry, Nat. I gotta do what I need to do."

Then he hung up.

——————————————————————————————

Natasha didn't even bother trying to get a hold of him because she knew he wouldn't be answering her calls when he was out there doing a fucking mission hunt for his friend. Trying to shake off the frustration and keeping herself distracted by the fact that Steve was still being a goddamn stubborn idiot, she decided to head straight for the Joint Counter-Terrorist Centre instead. 

As soon as she got there, the first thing she did was change her clothes. She took a shower and put on a black top, her favorite leather jacket, and dark-washed jeans. Once she was satisfied with her look, she headed to their meeting room where she was glad to find a sense of quiet for the first time today.

Or maybe she spoke too soon. "I'm not surprised to find you alive but grateful nevertheless." A voice spoke behind her. She raised her head up just in time to see Tony waltzing in with a clean-cut suit.

She eyed the outfit, looking impressed. "Nice suit," 

"I know right," He smirked.

Rolling her eyes, she smiled shortly. Tony would always be Tony.

He shoved both his hands in his pockets, cocking his head at her. He sensed her distressed look. "You okay little red? Wait, that was a stupid question, of course not." he corrected.

Her head suddenly hurt by everything that's happening. Just thinking about it made her want to punch a wall. "It's making my head hurt." She said with a sigh, rubbing her temples.

"Cap being stupid again?" Tony asked.

"He's doing a treasure hunt called finding your goddamn friend."

He flinched. "And I take it you're not in favor with this treasure hunt?"

She scoffed. "What do you think I'm here for?" 

A pang of hurt filled her chest. She just couldn't believe that Steve would do something as stupid as that. Lately, he's acting on his emotions more than his mind. He was out of his system lately, and she needed to get him back on his feet again. James was always enough of a distraction for him to be stubborn and stupid at the same time. 

"I saw the footage. I know it's him but I'm not denying anything. But he's just too... impulsive lately. He can't think with his head and he cannot think of the consequences of his actions first! He just does what he wants to do without giving a shit to anyone!"

Tony attempted to make a light of the situation, almost seeing smoke puff from her ears. Natasha was pissed, alright. "Talk about a role reversal, huh?" He kidded, referring to himself and the captain.

She wasn't amused in the least bit. "He won't listen." 

He snorted. "He never listens."

Natasha turned to him, arching a brow. "So do you." 

"And exactly why we don't get along." He claimed, face scrunching up in displease. "The past few months were okay, but recently, he's falling back into my 'People I highly dislike' list again."

She sunk back into her seat. How much had Tony and Steve's relationship improved since the incident with the time machine was beyond her amazement. It was almost a fucking miracle that they reached the point where they tolerated each other. To the point where they considered another as friends.

And she hated to see the two of them go back to the way they were before. 

Yet, then again, when were her requests ever granted?

She frowned. "But you two were getting along fine already."

Tony shrugged. "I guess the blame's on spangles. He started this when he didn't sign."

"He has his reasons, Tony." she defended.

He waved her off. "I won't hear it. Despite agreeing with me, I know you're still going to stand up for him."

"It's not that. I just..." She couldn't explain it. It was an instinct of her to defend his name wherever and whenever that happens. "You should hear what he has to say."

"If you really know me and Cap, then you know for sure there's a very low chance of that being successful." He dismissed the thought at hand. His eyes wandered over to something behind her. "Speaking of him... look what the cat dragged in."

Natasha, confused, followed his gaze and turned her attention behind her to see the monitor's screen showing Steve and Sam walking in. Guards surrounded both sides of them and it looked anything far from good. 

Her blood boiled as immensely as that and she quickly rushed out of the room, leaving the billionaire behind.

Steve quickly saw her standing at the end of the hall. Her arms crossed in front of her and eyebrows knitted together. She was frowning way way too deeply. Her striking green eyes were hard and fixated on anything but him.

Uh oh.

Sam seemed to know what was about to happen too and leaned in to tell him. "She's pissed, man."

"I've noticed," Steve replied tersely.

He tsked, clasping his back. "Well, I hope you live." And he left them be.

Steve ran a hand through his hair as soon as he stopped in front of her.

She was glaring at him so hard that he felt withering under her stare. He wanted the floor to eat him up. He swallowed hard, nervous. Preparing himself for what was coming. He deserved it anyway.

Say something, idiot. Say something. Anything. "Hi?" 

That ticked her off much more. She heaved a huge intake of breath and grabbed his wrist, hard that he felt like she was cutting off the blood in there. "Come with me."

She then dragged him with her. Steve tried to ignore the looks the other agents were giving them. Well, wasn't this a sight to see anyway? Black Widow was holding Captain America by the wrist, her face already accounting like she was about to murder someone, and he like a kid who was being punished.

They stopped on a part of the hall that was quiet and with fewer people. She released his deathly grip on him and cornered him on a wall so he couldn't escape. "Talk," she demanded. "Are they arresting you?"

Steve sighed. "I don't know."

"You're a terrible liar."

"It wasn't my fault." He defended so eagerly.  

She stepped a foot closer, eyes telling him that her patience was slowly running out. "Talk."

Admitting defeat, he just gulped and proceeded to follow her orders. "We found him." He said, sighing. "And I was right. It wasn't him. He said he was in Vienna but he doesn't do that anymore. Not since what happened in D.C."

She figured that's how this conversation would've started. "And then?"

"German ops barged in. Interfered and caused things that could've been avoided if they just gave us more time to settle things down." Steve countered, feeling the anger surging through him too. "They were about to kill him and I couldn't let that happen. Not when I knew it really wasn't his fault this time. There's someone out there trying to frame him."

Natasha tried to make sense of the situation but she didn't know where to start. The puzzle would always be missing a piece. These weren't enough to strongly support James' innocence. Not when he was known for doing such a thing. 

She didn't know how to make this better. And Steve was on detainment for causing such a ruckus like this. "You know, for the record, this is what making things worse look like."

Steve's face hardened. The vulnerable look on him was quickly replaced. "He's alive." he defended, his voice turned accusatory. "Don't tell me you're trying to put work again first?"

"I'm not putting anything first." She stated, annoyance filled her tone. "I'm trying to find a way to undo the mess that you started. Don't you get that?"

"Wha—" Disbelief struck him, leaving him completely slaw-jacked. "What I started? Why would this be my fault? I tried finding out on my own. The only reason I was there was to bring Bucky back and get him some help. But them? They couldn't even wait a damn second! They're the ones who made things, not just worse, but worst."

"Steve," She started, feeling her patience slowly started to drain out. "James means a lot to you and I know that. I understand that. Why do you think I'm taking the time to warn you about the consequences? I know you want to help him but this isn't the way."

"Then what is?" He argued, blue eyes glinting with so much pain. "You understand that? How can you understand that? You knew him before but you're acting just like everyone else!"

She gritted her teeth so hard that she thought it was going to break. "Don't talk to me like you know what I'm feeling. I know what I'm doing and I wish you could just see past your concern for Bucky to understand what I'm trying to do for the both of you but oh no. You're too stubborn with your pride, Rogers."

Steve almost lost his composure at that. Her calling him by his last name was a low move. She rarely ever calls him that. And now she knew, that she was just more than disappointed or pissed. She was downright mad and furious. 

For a slight second, she thought he was finally going to give in and admit his faults. But she thought wrong. Anger won over him. "Come on, Natasha! How is this suddenly about my pride?"

"Because you can't afford to step back and let other people do their jobs! It's not your place to do anything. And what you're doing? You're not helping James at all! Look at him! He's strapped down to a containment cell!"

His eyes flashed. "And you? What are you doing? At least I knew what I was doing and I don't regret what I did to help him."

"I am helping him."

"By not doing anything?"

"Yes, for now! We don't always have to do something every damn second! Some of us actually use our brains and weigh the consequences. We don't just fly to a fucking country and wander around to find our friend. We plan. We think. The only reason why they called the German Ops was probably because they knew you were there. And they knew they were no match for two super soldiers."

"So they decide to kill him?" Steve laughed humorlessly. "That makes some perfect sense then."

"What is wrong with you? You're not acting like yourself! This isn't you. You don't just rush to doing things without thinking about it." 

He didn't say anything to that, silently taking a breath like he was trying to calm himself down.

"I am trying to make this work." She hissed, taking a step closer. "I know what James must probably feel."

"And how can you possibly know what he feels?" Because I know what it's like to be seen as nothing but the monster I am when all I wanted was to be good. She thought. "You saw him as a soldier. As Sergeant Barnes. But that was it, right? Can't even afford to help me bring him back?" He questioned, seething. "Was that just how much he meant to you? After everything we went through in the past?" Oh, and how ironic that question sounded in her ears. It just triggered the guilt inside her more at the reminder that she had not yet still told him the truth. 

Humiliation crawled over her as he shattered the remaining bits of her self. He was gloating and he was spatting it right at her. He was too mad that he couldn't see how much he was hurting her. "You don't understand."

"You're right." He agreed, angry enough to keep on going. To keep on taking her off the edge. "I don't understand." 

That set her off. That was the last straw. "Goddamit, Steve." His words stirred too many emotions inside of her. And it hurt. It fucking hurt that they couldn't make this right. She wanted to... she needed to... "Why can't you just trust me?"

His eyes were still hard. Cold. Hurt. And as soon as his words were out, she felt a part of her died. "Because you don't trust me either."

She was stunned by his accusation. Struggling to think between the truth and a lie. And it was a low blow of him to do such a thing because he knew, better than anyone, that trust wasn't something Natasha just gives to anyone that easily. That he was one of the few people who had the chance to be worthy of her trust. And that goes the same to her; that she trusts him with her life and judgment more than anyone. 

So, hearing this now, from the man she loves, hurts more than anything she could possibly think of. It's not that she doesn't trust him, it's more about not trusting what their hell of a government could do to both him and James in the end.

"Is that what you think?" she asked, trying to ignore the twisting feeling in her stomach. The tight lump in her throat. The heavy weight in her chest.

Steve sighed, swallowing hard. "That's what you keep showing me."

"After everything that happened with me, with you, with us, that's what you're going to say? For God's sake Steve, we fight for a few times and that's what you're holding against me? That I don't trust you?"

"It's not the first time either of us did it. You always go digging up the past mistakes I made and keep throwing it back at me everytime we're in a fight!"

"So, you get to do the same, only you go so low as to spat at me the one thing that actually matters for me to have? Disgusting."

For a moment, he leaned back. All anger fled away from his face as it was filled with an ounce of shame. But he blinked it away. He stood taller, tightened his jaw. There was a pause, before he spoke again, "I'm tired of following orders." he said instead, "They're not after doing what's right anymore. They're after gaining control of everything. And that's something I can't stand by and watch them do."

Natasha tried to grab his arm. "Steve—"

He stepped away from her grasp before she could. "Don't, Nat." She felt like she had been slapped. "I'm sorry. Just... don't."

And without another word, he walked away.

Leaving her all alone without so much as a glance back.

    »»————- ☆ ————-««  

This was such a heartbreaking chapter I cannot even.

And we're not even reaching the point regarding Steve and Sharon's 'scene' in CW. 

I'm so sorry :(