Thomas POV

It was horrible seeing Raven like this.

'You can't do this!' I had shouted earlier to doctor Paige. It was unfair.

'Thomas, you need to understand that it is all part of the trials. We need to see how she reacts to this.' Doctor Paige had said.

'Convincing her to not eat anything?! That's your plan? Making her slowly crazy?' I was mad.

Doctor Paige didn't say anything else. I walked out of the room shutting the door behind me. How could they do this to her, Those voices, the memories. I couldn't watch her like this.

~

Newt's POV

The next morning me and Minho were already eating breakfast when Raven joined us.

'Hey.' She said while sitting down. She tucked her dark hair behind her ears and smiled. I could see the freckles on her nose and cheeks. Her perfect green-brownish eyes. They were beautiful and I felt like I could stare at them for hours. And then there is the way she-

My thinking was cut off when I heard a small cough coming from my right. I looked over and saw Minho raising his eyebrows while smirking at me.

I give him a 'what?' look and focused on my food again.

'We have a day off today.' Minho said.

'Really?' Raven asked.

'Yeah. Once a week we get a day off.' Minho replied.

'Sound great.' Raven said.

'Mhh, these eggs taste delicious.' Minho said.
'Why don't you have them?' Minho looked at Raven.

On her plate was just one single sandwich. I looked at her food and then at Raven. I locked eyes with here and raised my eyebrows.
She sighed lightly and took the sandwich in her hands, taking small bites. She didn't look very happy. I heard her feet tapping as she was still looking down eating.

I finished my own food after a few minutes and saw that Raven hadn't finished hers yet. I saw her close her eyes for a second or two and then open them again. After she finished eating she got up walking towards the homestead without even saying goodbye.

~

Raven's POV

'Mhh, these eggs taste delicious.' Minho said. 'Why don't you have them?' He looked at me. I shrugged and looked at my plate. I don't wanna eat. The voice was completely away and it was just me saying it to myself. I'll start eating later but not now.

I looked up and saw Newt looking at me. He looked down at my plate and raised his eyebrows as if he was telling me to eat it.
I sighed a little, grabbed the sandwich and took a small bite. It felt weird, like I wasn't supposed to do this.

Stop. Stop. Stop, I thought, repeating it in my head again and again. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I finally finished the sandwich and felt disgusting. The guilt I felt was horrible. I got up and walked to the Homestead leaving the boys behind.

~

I almost ran to the bathroom and threw up. Ew. At least the food is out.

I sighed and cleaned everything up. Why am I like this? I got up and went to get my dagger. Before I even knew what I was doing there were a few cuts on my wrists. Relief.

I put the dagger back and covered my arms with the long sleeves of my shirt.

I went outside and walking towards a tree. I sat down with my back leaning against the tree and I looked at the glade. It looked so peaceful, the green grass, the wooden huts. It was feeling more and like home, especially because of my friends. Alby, Minho.

And Newt of course, but something was different about him. He was so caring and kind. But also very beautiful, his messy blonde hair. The pretty brown eyes. He's so-

I was interrupted by someone sitting down next to me. It was Newt.

'Oh hey.' I said as I felt my cheeks turn red.

'What're you thinking about?' He asked me.

'Just... things. Nothing interesting.' I answered him.

'Alright.' He said not thinking much else about it.

'Do you like it here in the Glade?'

'Yeah. I'm getting used to it now.' I gave him a light smile and looked at the Glade again. I was actually getting used to it, but the memories and the voices were just... strange.

'Are you okay, love?' He asked me.

Love? That's new, I like it.

'Yeah, are you?' I asked out of interest.

'Yeah, I am.' He chuckled.

'Good.' I smiled.

We continued talking about the glade for a while and I decided I would go to bed now.

'I'm gonna go sleep. See you tomorrow.' I got up and wanted to walk to the homestead but I felt Newt grab my arm. He held it tightly which hurt me a little because of the cuts.

'What's that?' He looked at a red stain on my sleeve.

Shit.

'I don't know, probably something that happend while running.' I scratched my face.

'We'll see tomorrow.' Newt loosened his grip so I immediately pulled away and walked to the Homestead. 'Night!' I shouted before walking in.

That was close. I hope he will forget about it and just leaves it like this.

~

The next morning I woke up with the sun shining in my face, but it didn't make me very happy. There was an empty feeling inside of me, and I wanted to stay in bed all day, but knew I couldn't.

When I walked outside I saw Minho already standing at the doors so I walked towards him.

'Hey, shank.' He said.

'Hey.'

The doors soon opened and we ran in. Minho was supposed to turn right and I needed to go left.

'Be careful, don't die!' He shouted at me and then turned right.

The wind blew in my face and I enjoyed the running. After a while I stopped and saw it was supposed to be time for lunch, but I didn't bring it with me.

I'll bring it next time.

I was a fool to myself.

I rested for a few minutes, catching my breath. Then I ran back to the Glade.

Minho and Newt were already sitting at a table since it was almost time for dinner. I made my way to them and sat down.

'Hey Raven, Frypan is making spaghetti today!' Newt said with a smile.

'Oh, that's great!' I tried to say as excited as possible. A feeling of guilt washed over my body.

'Let's go grab some before everyone else does.' Minho said.

I nodded and got up. My vision blurred a little and I staggered. I blinked a few times and it went away. That's what happens when you haven't eaten in two days.

I followed the boys to the kitchen and Frypan handed us a plate filled with spaghetti and red tomato sauce. As we walked back Ben joined us and we sat down.

I looked at my food for several minutes and sighed. I felt really guilty, but eventually took a bite.

'I'm gonna head to bed already.' Minho said who apparently already finished eating. Their was something about the way he said. Like he was planning something.

I didn't think much of it and took another bite. I was doing okay and finished my whole meal after a while. I had a small smile on my face and Newt gave me a nod also smiling.

'I'm going to my room now, I think.' I said.

'Sure. I'll do that too in a few minutes.' Newt said goodbye and I left.

I opened the door to my room and my jaw dropped. The wooden wall had a big hole in it. What the shuck? How could've this happend?

'Bloody hell!' I heard a voice behind me saying. I turned around and saw Newt with wide eyes.

'Oops. Told you I would get you back.' I saw a smirking Minho behind Newt.

'By ruining my room?!' I asked, pissed off. "What the hell are you thinking? This isn't normal!

'Well, what can I say? I'm a badass.' Minho said while I gave him a dirty look. 'I guess you have to sleep with Newt now.' Minho said smirking and walked away.

I sighed.

'Alright then, we can't let you sleep here. We can move your bed to my room until your room is fixed.' Newt walked to my bed and I helped him lift it up. It wasn't that heavy actually.

'I'm gonna go sleep now.' I yawned.

'Yeah, me too.'

We were both standing in the room awkwardly and Newt scratched his back. We already moved some of my clothes to Newt his room.

'Uhh, do you mind turning around for a second?' I asked him a little embarrassed.

Newt turned his back to me so I could put on my pyjama.

~

A/n: omg, tysm for almost 60 reads! I'm so grateful!

I'll try to update as fast as possible.