I think a lot of hours have passed by the time the drugs are completely gone.

Just not yet out of our system. And talking about that, I'm going to pee in my dress if he doesn't let me go to the toilet soon.

I don't remember the dealer showing up as we were under drugs, so he must be gone for quite a while already. I truly wonder what he might be doing.

Mostly I wonder what Lyndon and Minho and Dad are doing, though. My other friends. Jennifer and Hiram.

But first, "I need a toilet break," I announce. I did my best to keep my voice steady and confident, but my words come out in a small peep, hesitantly.

His eyes move to me so slowly that it makes me even more anxious. Then he doesn't reply.

"I won't hold back. I'll pee on your fucking floor," I add.

Lie. I think I'd try my best to hold back. Who knows how long I'm gonna keep these pants on? I don't even want to think about it.

"Fine," he snaps. Fast-paced, Austin walks closer to me. "If you try anything at all— just don't."

His hands around my wrists hurt even more than the ropes. He's squeezing my bones together, hard. I quietly wince as we out of the building that must've once been a factory. Now it's empty, as mentioned before.

He takes me outside. There, I see nothing but endless fields with all kinds of plants. "Here."

"Can I get some privacy? At least sit behind a tree or something?"

"Hurry up," is all he says.

Crying isn't going to help, so I blink a few times. Bite my lip as hard as I can. "Would you please at least let me go so I can properly sit?"

He does let go of my wrists, but he stays within a feet away from me. I can't do things like this in front of this insane guy.

"I want to do it behind something. Or don't watch me, I don't care. Please just, let me..." I trail off, unaware of what else to say to convince him.

Without a word, Austin turns around.

I quickly do my job, still cringing at every single thing I'm doing in the open air with an absolute psycho next to me, then stand back up. "Done," I say.

He turns around, grabs my wrists, and leads me back inside. Just like that, I'm back in the chair.

That did make me feel a little better. It's some kind of relief. Not the relief I'd be hoping for, but something.

"Can I..." Thomas's voice comes out so frightened that he clears his throat and tries again, just to fail, "Can I do my thing as well?"

Austin stares at him. Thomas looks down before their eyes even meet. Austin's eyes stay burned on Thomas, like he's trying to pierce them through him. See through him. Maybe just scare him even more.

"Look at me," he says.

With a tight jaw, Thomas lifts his face and stares back at the man. "Please," he says. I can tell how badly he wants to stop looking at Austin. "I really need to go."

"Fine," he bites out once again. The same ritual that happened with me happens to Thomas. He's back in what feels like both hours and seconds.

When they return, the dealer slips inside with them. I feel my chest tighten, heart rising up and blocking my throat. I can breathe, but it doesn't feel like it.

"Guess what," he tells Austin. "They broke into my fucking house and communicated with you."

"What? Who?"

"Those kids," he grunts. His eyes go from me to Thomas before he steps closer to me. "Your little boyfriend." A slap across the cheek that surprises me so much that I audibly gasp. "Two of your friends." Another slap leaves a burning feeling on my skin. "And that fucking brother of yours." Lastly, I feel his elbow smashing against my nose. He does it with so much force that I smell the blood before it even starts streaming out.

Then he walks over to Thomas. "Yeah. Your two friends." He hits him as well. "Whatever that other boy is from you." Even while Thomas is sitting, he receives a knee in the crotch. The boy groans in pain. I can feel it hurt my body to see this. I want to stop looking but also not.

Before Thomas can finish desperately trying to bent down to his abandon, he also gets an elbow against the nose.

Then the dealer turns to Austin. "They told the freaking cops and now they're at my house. All my drugs and money, gone."

After some curses leave Austin's mouth, they quietly start talking. Thomas and I share a look, both of our eyes telling each other sorry once again. Then we're back to staring at the floor.

"Alright," a little more cheerful, somehow, the dealer raises his voice. "Let's play a game. Sophie's Choice. Ever heard of that? It's simple. I ask a question, you guys choose the answer."

The nervousness is beaming off us. Little drops of sweat or fast takes for air.

"We'll start of simple," he says, leaning against the wall. "Which one gets the meal?"

That meal could be poisoned.

But oh, my stomach starts grumbling at purely the word meal.

"Him."
"Her."

With his bottom lip forward, he cocks his head to the side. "We'll somehow have to decide. Okay, because it's the first thing, I'll treat you guys with a lot of kind things. One gets the meal, the other gets the bottle of water."

Thomas and I look at each other for a while. Both things sound so good to me. But he deserves it way and way more. It'll have to depend on what he wants the best.

A human can last multiple weeks without food, but only a few days without water. It's already been way too long since we've had a drink. "He gets the bottle, I get the meal," I say.

Thomas doesn't say a word. I guess there's an understanding that we'll somehow have to survive this. Or that eventually, we accept we're just going to die. It'll at least be together.

The dealer is gone while I'm thinking about all of this. A few minutes later, he returns with a plate of mashed potatoes and a bottle full with water. My mouth hangs half open at the sight of it. Had it been a few more hours later, I'd get so desperate that I just know I'd turn selfish.

"Now, I could've said we keep your hands tied, but I'll be nice." He starts untying the ropes. The second he does, I just start eating. I no longer care. Poisonous or not, I need something in my system.

"Alright," he moves on the second we finish eating and drinking. "Next. This one will happen a little further on today, but still. Which one's gonna get a lovely blanket on the chair tonight, and which one will spend it outside?"

Inside, a good night of sleep. Outside, attempt to escape. But not without the other.

My brain is working fast but it's not actually helping me. I know I won't be the one to escape if I'm left outside.

"Trust me, you won't even be able to escape," Austin says. "So, what's it going to be?"

"I'll sleep outside," Thomas volunteers. I'm about to protest, but the men have already happily agreed.

"One more thing. Who's allowed to sleep, and who has to stay awake?"

"She's allowed to—"

"I think Stephen deserves some sleep, doesn't he? You look tired enough, kid." Austin turns to me. "You're not closing your eyes tonight."

Nothing about this game will get me something good except for the freaking mashed potatoes.

"How about we call a loved one?" The dealer starts grinning. "Who will call for one minute, and who will be kept isolated from the other for at least an hour? It's a tiny, dark room."

These men have such stupid hobbies.

'Call Newt,' Thomas mouths.

I understand the rest. Newt is the one who would be able to remain the calmest and not talk through the one minute. He'd understand.

"Oh, and if the person you want to call decides to decline or just not pick up, then that sucks. You're not allowed to call someone else."

Newt barely ever uses his phone.

The look I give Thomas also tells him that. 'Hiram?', I mouth.

He's thoughtful for a second, then nods.

Hiram is also calm. He'll pick up.

'You or me?'

'You,' Thomas mouths back.

Can't deny I also think that's the best option.

Until I remember the dark room. I don't—

"I will go into the room for an hour and Lelia will have one minute on the phone with Hiram Lee. You probably already have his number, don't you?"

His grin widens, and he nods. "Austin, take the boy as we make the call."

He types in a few things, then it gets held in front of my mouth. Desperately, anxiously, nervously, everything at once, I wait for him to pick up.

"Hello?" It eventually sounds.

A ton gets lifted off my shoulders before I begin. "Hiram, hi. This is Lelia. Lelia Blake. Please don't interrupt— I have a minute. Thomas and I are held hostage by both my dealer and Thomas's dad. We're in some kind of factory surrounded by fields. The dealer has blonde hair. One of his houses is taken over by cops."

I don't know what else to say because I don't know much else. Panic washes over me.

"Uhm— uhm... Thomas and I got drugged at the ball and then got taken away right outside. We're okay for now, but we don't always get food and water. They're playing mind games. Eh— the factory is big and has multiple rooms. The walls are gray, I saw them. There's some woods in the distance. We're tied to brown chairs with ropes. Austin has an old Samsung— I don't know what kind. I'm sorry.. eh, eh—" fuck fuck fuck fuck running out of time "We'll do our bests to keep up. Hopefully I'll see you soon. If not, I'm sorry for stealing your money and tell Minho I really love him and Lyndon and Dad and you and Jen and Newt and even Am—"

He presses the red button. I close my eyes. I'm breathing way too fast. Sweat is sticking to my body. Please tell me I didn't miss an important detail.

"Done," he says, slipping the phone in my pocket. "For now, as your friend's spending his time in that room, you must continue playing the game." 

I give Austin, who sneaked in halfway through the call, a nasty glare as the question makes its appearance, "Who gets to shower and who stays here?"

"Thomas showers, I stay."

"Does he get a bath as well?"

"I'll take the bath."

"Who will stay close to the heater, and who will sit in the coldest room we have?"

"I'll take the coldest room."

"Who's going to speak freely, and who will be gagged?"

"I'll be gagged."

"We have some audios ready. You want the music or the sounds you're certainly not going to enjoy for twenty minutes straight?"

I force my tears away. "I'll listen to the horrible sounds, Thomas the music."

"Who gets a glass of water and who stays dehydrated?"

"...I get a glass of water," I decide. Thomas got the bottle before, and I don't want to do all of this just to die.

"I guess that's enough for now," he decides. "The following days are already gonna be long for you."