𝟬𝟯𝟭𝟬.
warnings: mental health and mention of suicide!
___
"SHE'S not in her room," Drew stressed, as they looked all looked around the house of his cousin who had been gone for god knows how long. "I swear to god Aunty." He panted as he explained to her as she was now panicking behind her seat, "She was in there 10 minutes ago."
Vigorously shaking her head, Alexis gulped, "It's okay. This isn't your fault. It's mine I should've left the moment she stormed off."
"No blaming," Carmen warned, "it won't help anyone." She rose from her seat to comfort her friend. "We have three cars between us. I'll call around. She can't have gotten far on foot."
"She's fast," Alexis dismissed, as Rosa passed everyone their keys.
Drew agreed, "Yeah, she runs at night sometimes and has been through the summer. Her endurance is almost as good as mine."
"Qué pasa con estos niños hoy en día? ¿Qué pasó con ser vago?" Rosa asked.
Carmen shook her head disapprovingly, "Mama."
"Try and get in touch with Lily," Drew said, with all seriousness, which warmed his aunt.
He was just as scared as him.
"I'll call Miguel," Carmen put her phone to ear, cursing when it went straight to voicemail.
Drew groaned, "She's not picking up her phone."
"Neither is Miguel," Carmen started to panic.
"Llama a Johnny," Rosa suggested to her daughter.
Carmen agreed, despite her feelings for the man, "I'll try Johnny."
Drew's fingers slammed down on his phone screen as his aunt trembled near him.
hotfacelily
she blocked me
can't see location
is she okay?
want me to help?
drewisthebest
no. she's fine.
you know cj she's
being annoying
hotfacelily
we might not be
friends but i still
love and care.
please let me know
drewisthebest
i got you.
seen
Alexis stammered out, "W-what about Eli?"
"Not answering his phone," Drew said.
The adults didn't understand a generation that was obsessed with their phones, they weren't answering them.
"God these kids," Carmen murmured.
"Maybe she's got in a cab to see my mom?" Drew pointed out to his aunt.
Alexis sadly dismissed, "I doubt that."
Carmen asked, "Where does your mom live?"
"Across the country," Drew anxiously answered.
Alexis choked back a sob, "Where is my daughter?"
"Come on. We have no time to waste," Drew took charge and ushered everyone out of the house, leaving food uncovered, music playing and lights on.
Christmas in the Valley was warmer than many believe everyone was having a festive time, full of love, laughter and gift-giving. But behind closed doors, everything was picture perfect. Shouting, screaming, food burning.
Or worse, silence.
How Cameron viewed her family — a warm hostility that should never be addressed.
And even in death, it's not addressed.
Trudging over to her father's grave made it all painstakingly obvious.
Pushing up her glasses and scrunching her nose when she saw it.
Thinking that was all it came down to.
Names and dates? And what, a brief summary of what he was.
Blake James
Son, Brother, Husband, Father.
'Forever in our thoughts. On our minds and in our hearts.'
"How fucking cliché." Standing disturbingly still she scoffed at the tombstone. Her heartbreaking harshness tore through the chilling silence, "But they got that right, 'in our thoughts. On our minds. In our hearts'. Especially with how you ended your life."
A harrowing pain wrecked her body as she sniffled, eyes darted over all that was left of her dad.
"I spent days taking care of you. I even bathed you when mom was busy, and made sure you were fed. You had me thinking this was all normal." She gritted, forcing back her tears — somehow harbouring the energy to do so. "That I could never relax, fearing that one day you'd eventually just up and leave or you would never speak to me again or you would never wake up." Her lips trembled as she glared, "But I wasn't completely wrong, was I? You never woke up again." She had to face the truth, she needed to. "And now you have me here Dad. By your side. Ranting to a tombstone with a soppy saying, your birthday, your death day and a bunch of flowers."
If she could rip it out of the ground she would. She would punch at the soil, which would scratch and mould into her skin. Making her blood seep into the earth that grew around her father's corpse.
"How could that ever make up for you ever leaving us behind? Leaving me with confusion, pain, physical pain that drives me up the wall trying to figure out." Her glasses shuffled down her face, fogging up with the tears she kept from flowing. "But no, in this family, we don't figure anything out, we just carry on. We continue like there is nothing wrong but here is. There always is but we don't talk about it. I just wish you could talk about it. Because maybe if you did and then I would've," bile threatened to creep up her throat as she coughed out, "Then I could've just listened to Miguel when he said I should've just taken time off. And now you're gone, he's gone. Two different heartbreaks and I know they don't equate but even then I can't fully tell the difference."
She hoped she could.
Her sniffles grew louder. "I hate you for leaving me. I mean what kind of father leaves their child? Were you honestly trying to make me a statistic?" Her phone vibrated in her pocket, but her truth numbed it all. It had been ringing so she climbed out of her window but she didn't care enough to turn it off. "You're so fucking selfish Dad. And I won't apologize for cursing because you deserve this. You abandoned me. You abandoned mom. You abandoned our entire family. And we weren't enough for you to just stay." I wasn't enough for anyone to stay. "Look I get it. You were hurting and in so much pain you couldn't move for days, eat, sleep or just live but... couldn't you have just tried harder?"
Cameron's voice was lowered with the drying of her throat, the rawness of every word she said, each syllable she pronounced.
She was so fucking tired of everything.
"I tried harder. I fought... I think," she scoffed as she couldn't contain her tears, her sobs or her feelings. "But now I tortured a kid who is our enemy. My enemy? Nothing makes sense anymore. I just feel lost." Her tear-stained cheeks didn't dry, they couldn't. "It just feels like shit. So thanks for this Dad. What a fucking legacy."
Blake James. Son, Brother, Husband, Father.
Coward.
He could not deal with his pain so he moved it to others.
His baby girl.
She flinched at the sound of engines driving up to where she struggled to stand.
The headlights of all three cars shone a light on her, she cowered in distress only to squint when her mom raced out of the car, tumbling through the cemetery.
It was Drew who suggested she would come here. Finally and agonizingly. Needing to grasp her reality. And deal with it.
The sight of seeing her daughter so broken, so scared and confused was so gut-wrenching to Alexis.
She didn't hesitate to wrap her in her arms, rocking her like any mother should do for their child.
"I'm sorry," Cameron cried out.
"We'll work this okay?" Alexis' voice cracked but her hold tightened.
"I'll quit Cobra Kai."
They felt eyes on them more than just Carmen and Rosa who hugged one another, more than Drew who jogged over to join his family who cried together.
Perhaps it was a spirit of the man who's grave they stood near, seeing what he had left but also who picked up the pieces he broke.
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END OF SEASON 3
a/n:
when i say i was planning to make this chapter darker than what it was, believe it. originally i was gonna have cameron sat on the bridge where blake took his life but that was too much. and since i had already mentioned how she hadn't left the car to visit her dad's grave this was the best place for her to visit — escaping the reality of one parent's words, to find comfort in the other.
it was supposed to be the first pull cameron had back to her old life which wasn't just talk therapy or medication (which i am an advocate for). taking in and not avoiding any mention of her dad's death first hand was the best thing for her. this is what i wanted the season 3 finale to be. especially since i didn't want to write her into the fight. hawk already has his realization during it, i wanted cameron's to be something else.
her villain arc is finally over but that doesn't mean her feelings and angst has just faded. it's gonna take time for her to adjust especially to another dojo. if she decides to join miyagi-do, for her sake or even her mom's.
i kinda like the fact that drew was serious this chapter, no joking or messing around just putting his cousin first like he had been determined to do but it didn't fit right until now. lily still cares but he didn't want her involved and kept it a family matter.
it'll a shock to others if they find out what happened or how she'll react to the events of this finale and how they will react to her changing or starting to. like kreese, tory, miguel, sam, daniel, hawk and everyone else.
so far this has been my quickest season to write, and my most challenging but also suspenseful. the fact i had the carmen and rosa there for witness was beautiful to me. carmen knows what it's like to have a kid transform into something they don't recognise, plus cameron was her son's girlfriend before, so obviously she would get involved and help.
i do have a lot planned for season 4, which I hope you enjoy. any theories? anything you liked about this season or anything you missed compared to the others?
it was a short yet gut wrenching chapter (and other readers of mine know i love writing those)
hope you enjoyed, feel free to reread. check out my tumblr for one shots and rants and tiktok for edits.
thank you for the support.
- liv
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