Queen

My head began to throb from my sobbing and Syn wrapped his arms around me. At that moment, nothing else that happened mattered to me. Lilith was the furthest thing from my mind and all I could think about was that Syn was back...completely.

He was here with me for months now but knowing that he now remembered me, us, everything we went through...I was beyond exhilarated.

"I've missed you too," he said.

I pulled away from him and looked at him for a long time before slapping him on the arm.

"Ouch. What was that for?" He asked in an unfazed voice.

"For saving me. Thank you...but I'm mad at you."

"Of course you are," he said with a smile. "Be mad at me later, I need to check on Bezy."

"Why?"

He gave me a look and I held my hands up. "Never mind, go ahead. I'll take the bags to the room."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," I urged as I walked back down the steps. Before I could make it to the bags, Syn pulled my hand and pulled me to face him. I looked at him in confusion before he gave me a quick kiss on the lips and strode up the steps back into the palace.

I bit the inside of my cheek to hold back the smile coming on my face and picked up the bags. I had no idea how Syn managed to carry them with ease since I struggled up the steps.

I walked into the cool palace and a servant carrying her a baby approached me. "Do you need help, your highness?" She asked as she bounced the crying baby in her arms.

"Umm," I hummed with a smile as I eyed her. "Do you?"

She looked at me and then the baby and laughed softly. "This is my first and I have no idea what I'm doing." The smile on her face seemed forced and her eyes were red and puffy.

"How old?"

"He's four months."

"Aww," I said as I looked at the adorable crying bundle of joy in her arms.

"He looks like an angel but he's pure evil," she said with a forced laugh.

"I think the first is always hard, right?"

"Yes, definitely," she said. "I've been up for almost three days with this big boy. I'm trying to find a babysitter but I'm having no luck, so I apologize for bringing him here today."

"No worries," I said. "If you want I can watch him for a few hours so you can get some sleep?"

"I couldn't do that, your majesty," she laughed softly.

"I don't mind. I want you to get some sleep anyway."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure," I said. "Just let me drop off these bags and I'll take him."

I adjusted the bags on my shoulders and began walking up the steps and she followed behind me. "Thank you for this, you have no idea how much this means to me."

"No problem."

We made the long walk to Syn's room and I opened his door and set the bags down. "Oof, here we are."

She held the baby out to me and I smiled as I took him into my arms and rocked slightly. The baby almost stopped crying instantly and looked up at me with big brown eyes.

"You're a natural," she said.

"Ehh, I'm okay." I looked back up at her and raised a brow. "Do I need to feed him anything?"

"No, he just ate so he should fall asleep in a bit."

"Okay, try to get some rest," I said. "Use any of the guest rooms."

"Thank you." She leaned in and kissed her son quickly. "Please take care of him."

"I will." She left the room and closed the door and I looked down at her son. "Well, what's up..."
The baby gave me a toothless smile and I tapped his cheek and made a funny face.

I adjusted him onto my chest to walk around the room and move the bags out of the way. I kept mine by the door but moved Syn's bags deeper into the room. When I moved to take his bag of clothing to his closet, my eye landed on a familiar object on the table.

I furrowed my brows and walked towards it to see the ruby necklace Dimitri had taken from me and I frowned. Under the necklace was a letter of some sort and I knew it was wrong to invade his privacy this way, but I was too curious.

My son...

My heart dropped as I read the letter from my father and I froze. Why didn't he want Syn to tell me? What was he doing that he was afraid he may not come back from?

I hadn't seen him since Xavia died and I always wondered why he never reached out again. The fact that he was alive was amazing news but I had so many questions...

Let it go...

With a deep breath, I set the paper and necklace down in the same position I found it and walked away. Syn and I made an agreement that I'd let go of any secrets he was keeping from before yesterday. Besides, it seemed like my father didn't want me knowing he was alive anyway.

I was surprised myself that I wasn't more upset at everything Syn seemed to be hiding, but after seeing he got his memory back, I couldn't be.

I was unsure of Syn's true intent when it came to me after he came back, but this Syn...I knew him like the back of my hand and he would never do something to hurt me.

That thought and assurance alone was enough for me to just trust him and stop asking questions.

I put the bag in the closet and turned to go to the door. The baby stirred in my arms but with a few gentle movements, he was back to his peaceful state. His mother told me he was supposed to be asleep soon but he was wide awake.

"You adorable little cutie pie," I said in a baby voice as I tickled him gently. He cooed in my arms and I laughed softly before opening the door.

"Woah," Syn said as he stepped back from almost bumping into me. "Watch your step."

"You saw the door opening. You watch yours," I said as I stepped into the hall.

"Umm, mind telling me what you're carrying?"

"It's called a baby, Syn," I said as I walked into my room.

"But whose baby?" He asked as he followed behind me.

"Ahh, one of the servants. She looked really tired so I offered to watch after him so she could get some sleep."

"That's sweet of you," he said. "What's his name?"

I frowned as I remembered my conversation with the servant and I shook my head. "She didn't tell me."

I looked down at the baby as he turned his small head in Syn's direction. A giggle immediately erupted from his tiny body and he stretched his small arms out in his direction.

He looked up at me in confusion and I held her out for him. "He wants you."

"Umm...I shouldn't," he said nervously as he stepped back.

I sent a pout in his direction and lifted the baby to face me. "Don't be sad, sweetie. He's scared of babies."

"Okay...don't talk shit about me to him," he muttered as he held his hands out. "Here."

I placed him into Syn's arms and he slowly laid him against his chest. The baby almost immediately closed his  eyes and I looked up at Syn with a smile. "I think he likes the material of your shirt."

He furrowed his brows and looked at his shirt than me. "Cotton?"

"No, father material."

"Queen, goodbye," he muttered as he walked past me. I burst out into laughter behind him and he shook his head.

"It's the truth," I said. "You know you're great."

He sat down on my bed and adjusted the small blue blankets around him and looked back up at me. "Am I?"

"Yes, you're amazing with James and you were great with Xavia," I said as I sat down next to him. "And I believe you'll be just as good with more kids...if we have them."

"If?" He asked. "There's a chance that we're not having more?"

"I don't know," I said with a shrug. "Maybe."

"Why?" He whispered as he stood up. He walked around to the other side of the bed and laid the baby down. He placed pillows on the edge of the bed and looked up at me with a raised brow while he pat his back.

"I don't think I want more."

"Really?"

"Yeah...after Xavia, I just abandoned the thought of having any more. I also didn't think you were coming back so I never thought about it again."

"I see," he said as he came back to my side. Our arms rubbed together as he sat down and I smiled at the contact. "Me being back makes no difference in that regard?"

"In a way," I whispered. "I just-...whenever I think about giving birth, my mind goes back to everything that happened."

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked sincerely. "I know I wasn't there, but I was your husband after all."

"Was my husband?" I asked.

"I don't know," he shrugged. "I'm not sure what the laws in resurrected spouses are." I laughed softly and shook my head and he nudged me with his arm. "Tell me what happened."

"Well, after you died as you know, the Seers came and killed her or at least a part of her...I don't know. But she was still growing inside of me for the next few days. My water broke, I went into labor as people do, and I had to push her for hours."

My eyes watered as I recalled the memory, but Syn squeezed my leg and I continued. "It was the most painful thing I had ever been through. And what made it hurt the most was the hope that it brought me. I had no idea what was going on so I thought that maybe she was alive and they made a mistake.

Xavia though, like us, didn't come out as a cloud of black smoke. I just remember pushing her out and hearing silence throughout the room. No screaming, or crying...just complete silence. They told me a few minutes later that she was dead and they let me hold her and stuff."

"I'm sorry," Syn whispered.

I shrugged and wiped my eyes. "But yeah, after that I'm not sure I want children."

"I understand," he said as he took my hand into his.

My heart broke a little bit since I knew Syn wanted kids but I wasn't sure if I could bring myself to do it. "I know you want kids. One day, I promise I'll get over it."

He circled his thumb on my hand and brought it to his lips. "You don't have to 'get over it'. Even if you never want to, that's fine. I'll never understand exactly what you went through, but I'm not going to pressure you into doing something that hurts you. Your well-being matters more to me."

I smiled at him and let out a sigh of relief. "You don't mind adoption?"

"Not at all."

"Thank you," I whispered. He gave me a kiss on the cheek and looked at his watch. He turned around to look at that the baby and then turned back to me.

"We're going to miss our date. Do you want to just stay in and I'll order food?"

"Syn stop feeding me," I mumbled as I held a roll on my stomach. "I'm getting so fat."

"Who?"

"Me-"

"Cares."

"Wow," I said dryly.

"If you don't want to eat then don't, but don't do it on my behalf. I think you're sexy now and you'll still be sexy if you gain two-hundred pounds," he muttered in boredom as he scrolled through his phone.

"Aww, I'll think you're sexy if you gain two hundred pounds too."

"Yeah, duhh," he mocked.

꧁꧂

Author's Note
Nooo😭 no more mini SinClaires?!

I feel bad for Syn and Queen😔.
I understand why Queen wouldn't want kids but at the same time I could only imagine Syn's heart ache. At least he's being supportive ❤️
Lmk your thoughts ✨