Cain

I sang along to the music blaring from the TV as I danced around the room in my boxers. For once in what felt like a million years, it felt like all my problems were alleviated. I was on top of the fucking world.

I never knew how much of an effect my mother had on my life until she was completely gone. Not only was I free, but I was fucking overjoyed. I got so into my personal concert that I almost didn't hear my phone from the table.

I quickly turned down the music and walked towards it to pick it up. I sighed as I saw Mia's number flash across the screen, but I answered it and laid back on my bed as I held the phone against my ear.

"Hey," she said simply.

"What do you want?" I asked as I looked up at the ceiling.

"Dang, I just wanted to see if you wanted to hang out," she said. "You know like we used to."

"Mhmm."

"I'm on my way home. I have snacks, I can get a pizza, and we can watch movies all night," she offered.

"No," I declined. "Thanks for the offer."

"Why no?" She asked. "Aren't we at least friends still?"

"I don't know, Mia."

"So just because of me not being ready to choose yet, we can't be friends?"

"I didn't say that. I didn't even say that was the reason."

"But you implied it," she said.

"How does 'I don't know' imply anything?" I argued. "I could be tired, Mia."

"Because before everything happened you would've come even if you were about to pass out, Cain. I didn't think you were the type to just drop me over something so stupid."

"How did I drop you?"

"You don't let me talk to you, touch you or answer my texts anymore. You're supposed to be my best friend and...."

As she continued ranting, a large wave of anxiety and stress began to wind up in my chest. I closed my eyes and moved my phone away from my ear as the sensation moved throughout my body. My body felt heavy and it felt like I was sinking into the bed.

I felt like shit, and it didn't help that I could still hear her talking on the phone. I loved Mia still, but it was starting to physically drain my energy. Especially when she wouldn't make a decision and I was forced to hang out with her.

Irritation began to chip away at my calm walls and I held the phone up again. "Fuck, fine!" I interrupted. "Fuck, Mia. I'll be there damn."

The line thankfully remained silent for a few moments until she laughed softly. "Thank you. I need someone to talk to."

If she was going to talk to me about Jackson like she always did, I'd never speak to her again. For her sake and my well-being, I hoped that wasn't the case.

"What toppings do you want on the pizza?"

"Why ask when you always get what you want anyway?" I asked. I hung up my phone before she could say anything else and I tossed it aside.

Less than two minutes ago, I felt like the happiest man in the world and now I felt even worse than how my mother made me feel. It was a numb feeling that felt like nothing at all, but everything at the same time. It was smothering any sort of happiness that I previously felt.

A knock at my door momentarily distracted me from my drowning state, but I kept my eyes closed. "Come in."

The door opened and I laid an arm over my eyes as I took a deep breath. My head was beginning to throb like crazy. "What do you want?" I groaned.

I heard the person close the door again and I almost thought they left, until I heard another footstep.

"Son."

I frowned at the familiar voice and lowered my arm to look to my side. My eyes widened and I almost didn't trust them until I completely sat up from the bed. "Dad?!"

"It's me," he whispered.

"Is this a dream?" I asked as I looked around.

"Do you want me to pinch you?"

"Please do." I held out my arm and closed my eyes as I expected myself to wake up. But instead, I felt a sharp sting on my arm that made me scream out. "Fucking ouch!"

He laughed at my outburst and my eyes shot open. "It is really you." He looked like he was about to say something else but I wrapped my arms around him tightly. "Dad."

He pat my back awkwardly and I closed my eyes. "I'm not going to ask why you're half-naked." I didn't even know how to reply to that. How could he not see me for thousands of years and-...and...

I pulled away quickly from his hold as memories from so long ago began to resurface in my mind. "You left us..."

"It's not that simple," he answered. "Let me explain."

"How do you explain leaving your family?!" I yelled as I backed up. "No wait, you kept in contact with Adam before you died...you just came to me to tell me to protect Queen. So I'm the only one you left."

"Cain, I-"

"Why?" I asked as my chest caved in. "After I killed Abel, everyone turned their back on me. I didn't think you would."

"I didn't."

"You left! You just left with Lilith and my mother she-..." I was cutting off by my heavy breathing and I put my hand over my chest as it pained.

"Cain, deep breaths, remember?" He instructed as he tried to walk towards me.

I pushed him away with my free hand as I leaned against a nearby wall. My vision became blurred as I sunk to the floor and my body heated. My breathing was short and shallow as what felt like a hand, moved around my throat.

I hadn't had a panic attack ever since I left my mother. My father used to calm me down when I had them, but after he left, my mother was the only person around. All she did to help was laugh and taunt me.

My family was the only group of people in the world that managed to get this reaction out of me.

I felt my father come down next to me and take my hand as he held onto my shoulder. "Deep breaths, Cain. You're going to be fine."

I nodded and he helped me guide my breathing back to normal and I leaned my head against the wall. I continued taking deep breaths until I was calm again and I relaxed the built-up tension in my body.

"Explain," I said in a hoarse voice as I removed my hand from his. He sighed before sitting next to me on the floor and crossing his arms.

"It's going to sound crazy," Adam said. "But God told me to."

"What?" I said as I turned to him.

"We were the first humans so he always instructed us to do things so he could test our reactions. Like some mad scientist," he said. "He told me to leave you all and run away with Lilith."

"W-...I don't get it."

"Your mother and I..." he trailed off as he shook his head. "I didn't love her. I tried but I really couldn't. You hear about how Lilith was made for Lucifer, but that's not the complete truth. She was made for me as well.

She was God's first trial when it came to free will. As you know, Lucifer and I both fell for her, and I was with her at some point, but I ended it. I chose you all over her and she disappeared. I found out she was back with Lucifer but I guess that didn't satisfy God because he came to me one night."

"And told you to go to her?"

"Yes."

"Why didn't you say no?" I questioned.

"You know we couldn't say 'no' to God back then," he said.

"Well, why didn't you take me with you?"

"I would've taken you if I could, but I wasn't permitted," he said.

"I thought it was because you hated me," I admitted.

"Why would I hate you?"

"Because I killed Abel."

"That was a hard loss, but I knew he wasn't gone forever. Besides, how could I fault you for following God's unethical experiments?"

"God had nothing to do with that," I said. "I killed Abel all on my own."

"Maybe so," Adam said. "But you are aware that it was all a lie, right? God told you after he brought Abel back, I'm sure."

"What are you talking about?" I questioned as I faced him.

"You truly don't know?" He asked.

"Know what?"

"It never crossed your mind why a boy who never stole anything...stole from you in front of God?"

"He wanted to outdo me, like always..."

"Whatever little brotherly squabble the two of you may have had, had nothing to do with that day," he said. "God commanded him to steal from you. Lilith may have been the first trial of free will, but you were the first test of the bounds of human jealousy."

"No," I said as I shook my head quickly. "That can't be true, Abel has been trying to best me since we were children."

"Abel was different from us all," Adam said. "The voices of Angels were always in his head and guiding him. That's why we watched him more closely than we did with you. He wasn't responsible for a lot of his actions back then.

It went away as he grew up but God did still instructed him to do things. Whether it be, argue with you or steal your sacrifice. I believe all those little things were leading up to the moment you killed him."

"He-...Abel was told to betray me," I whispered.

"I thought you knew this entire time," he said. "God said he would tell you everything. I just believed the two of you chose to stay away from one another because God still used him."

"Still uses him?" I asked. "What do you mean?"

"Cain..." he said slowly. "You believe God is done toying with you?"

I immediately stood up from the bed and grabbed my phone. I dialed Mia's number on the phone and impatiently waited as it rang. Why didn't Abel tell me himself if all of this was going on?

"Hello?" Mia said.

"I need Jackson's address."

"Absolutely not. I won't let you hurt him over this du-"

"It's not fucking about you!" I yelled. "I won't hurt him, but tell me where the fuck he lives."

She hung up on me and I ran a hand through my hair in frustration.

"Are you planning to go see him?" My father asked.

"Yes, I need to hear this shit from him," I said. "If you're right then I've fucked up everything."

"It's not that simple," he started. "Abel is almost like a prophet to God. If you let Abel know that you're aware of what happened. God will know."

"Who cares? Can't God see everything anyway?" I asked.

"That's a myth," he said. "He used to be able to, but as the world got larger, his omniscience weakened. He can only see outcomes that he manipulates, which is why your sister is such a wild card for him. If you go to Abel, he'll see and hear it all."

"What do I do then?" I asked desperately. "I killed my brother for doing something he was forced to do."

My father laid a hand on my shoulder and nodded. "Don't worry. Abel is not as dense as he may act at times. I'm sure he knows that you don't know."

"Is that why you told me to protect Queen?" I asked. "Because if you told Abel, God would know?"

"That's a small part of the reason," he answered.

"What's the main reason?"

"I wanted the both of you to have one another. Don't take this wrong, but Abel is very...he's a rule follower. He has a line that he won't cross even if it's for someone he loves."

"And I don't have a line?" I muttered. "Seriously?"

"Both you and Queen don't, which makes you stronger together," he said.

I nodded slowly in understanding and sighed as I sat down on the bed. "Well, what now?"

"Now, you continue living your life. If you happen to see Abel again, maybe tell him you forgive him without letting him know anything."

"Shouldn't I be the one to apologize?" I whispered.

"Well, that would mean that you've had a sudden change of heart and no offense to you at all, but you're not that...you know? It would be a big red flag."

"You're right," I said in agreement. I looked up at my father to see him frown as a sour look appeared on his face. "What?"

"This is going to sound crazy, but I'm going to ask anyway," he started.

"Okay..."

"Would the Anti-Christ happen to be anywhere in this vicinity?"

꧁꧂

Author's Note
I-well damn...

Just...
Lmk your thoughts ✨