A/N-
Hey everyone, this chapter is gonna be a long one, but also really important for the plot and where i want this story to go. Anyways happy reading!

-

Chapter twenty-one
"Murky Results"

Jimin POV

Beep...beep...

...beep...beep...

...beep...beep...beep

I hate fucking hospitals.

Before I even opened my eyes after my collapse, I knew we were in a hospital.

With all the fucking buzzing machines, the doctor and nurse gossip, plus hearing the sobs and whispers of my friends... I entered hell.

Taking a deep breath and trying my damndest to mentally prepare myself for the biggest possible backlash I had experienced in my twenty-one years, I blinked my eyes open.

It took a few moments for my vision to adjust to my surroundings, and I could hear the shuffling of feet and gasping of throats, as people began to surround my bedside.

"Jesus fucking Christ," I groaned, rubbing my eyes vigorously with the back of my arms, "you guys act like I just fucking died and rose again."

"Mr. Park, welcome back once again. How are you feeling?" a doctor asked.

I took a deep breath, wincing at the pressure on my forehead, "Like I just crawled through hell, scraped the back of my head on straggled cement, licked broken glass, and ate a giant brass tuba. How about yourself?"

"Much happier now that you're fully responsive for more than just a few seconds. Can you open your eyes more for me? I want to check your pupils."

I widened my eyes as much as possible, and through my peripheral vision, I caught a glance that about forced my heart to falter again. There she stood, the blonde that captured my heart, crying tears of possible happiness or defeat, in the arms of Jungkook Jeon. Her face was buried into the shoulder of his shirt, and he was caressing the back of her head and telling her it was all okay now.

"Jimin, look at me."

I cleared my throat, focusing on the mini-flashlight that was blinding me.

The nurses began checking my pulse and doing a bunch of random little tests, while the doctor did his run-down.

I didn't really pay attention when they were examining me like a fucking rat trapped behind its wheel.

Instead, I tried to remember what the hell happened that put me here. But each time I tried, I got a severe pain on the upper left side of my head, and I stopped attempting to think.

It hurt too much.

"Mr. Park, can you tell me what you last remember?"

"Uh," I stammered, scratching my five o' clock shadow, "I was in the front room, waiting..."

"We counted a high level of alcohol in your system, as well as tobacco, and some illegal substances, and prescription drugs. Do you remember consuming all of these items?"

I nodded, closing my eyes tight, "Vaguely. I was under a bit of stress."

"Can you tell me everything you remember taking?"

Taking a deep sigh, I began, "Twelve pack of Budweiser, two double vodka spritzers, ...uh... like, half a Xany-bar, ...smoked a joint or two throughout the day... the usual Camels... that's it."

"Tell me the very last thing that you remember before the black out."

I looked around the room, taking in the expressions of very worried Jennie and Yoongi, a tearful Yoona, an empathetic Jungkook, Luna's mom brushing through my hair looking like a concerned mother, Ron standing behind her with his arms crossed looking impatient, Luna biting her lip looking extremely fucking nervous, Taehyung's mom stretching around her son to get a better glance of me, Taehyung wearing tiny square-framed glasses, and a doctor's jacket over his clothes, standing behind his father while appearing hesitant, and finally, Taehyung's dad and another doctor staring at me like I was a newborn baby they were waiting to hear cry for the first time, along with about three random female nurses.

"Mr. Park?"

"I... uh, can't remember exactly. Just waiting."

Of course, I knew this wasn't true, and that I remembered exactly what happened and what I was waiting on.

Fucking pregnancy results. Like the impatient viewers of the Maury Show, I wanted to hear 'you ARE the father!'

But I didn't want to say that, just in case no one else knew but the four of us involved.

The doctors began explaining shit to me in highly overwhelming doctor language, where I caught about every eighth word of the sentence, and it started to give me a headache.

I coughed, waving my hands in the air, trying to get them to shut up, "Wait, wait, wait. ...What are you saying right now?"

They began again, and it just started the entire moaning/headache process.

"Shut. The. Hell. Up," I said through my cold palms. "Taehyung, can you please tone their rambling intellectual shit down to my level of brain capacity?"

Taehyung stepped around his father, readjusting his glasses, "Jimin, what Dr. Hollingston meant is, what started with you, at first, was a typical anxiety attack. Those happen as a body defense, when you're experiencing high levels of stress or pressure. You'll start to feel dizzy, sweaty, ears ringing, along with other symptoms, and then your heart will begin to beat erratic, which may worry you and force your reactions to worsen. We're assuming it made you nervous, and you began to panic, heighten your senses, along with your body defense shield mechanisms. You began to sway around, showing me you were on the verge of possibly losing consciousness... The way your lashes began to flutter and your jaw tightened, the left side of your eye began to hang... I believe this may have been signs of a start of a Complex Partial Seizure. I wasn't that close to you, but I reached out to grab you. Because you were dead weight at the moment, I couldn't hold you up. We were standing in the living room, and you fell to your left, toppling down and hitting above your left temple on the corner of the coffee table."

I furrowed my brows and winced, rubbing the bandage on my head.

"After that," Taehyung continuing, raising his chin a little, "your anxiety attack, which led into the Complex Partial Seizure, progressed into a Tonic Clonic Status Epilepticus. It's a long lasting convulsive seizure. You began to spasm and shake, and then vomit was immured. I turned you sideways and fingered out as much of it as possible, and we got you here within the thirty minutes needed. If we had waited any longer, the results may have been fatal."

I shook my head, still unable to grasp everything, "What does that mean?"

"It means Taehyung saved your life," the Dr.Holling-whatever-his-name-was explained. "Seizures are hardly even fatal, even if one loses consciousness. But when vomit intermits due to a TCSE Seizure, if the bile is not completely removed from the throat passageway, it can be, due to suffocation."

I couldn't think without being confused, "But, I've never had a seizure before..."

Taehyung stepped forward again, looking professional, which shocked me. I didn't even know he knew what the hell he was talking about, being that he was supposed to be an OB-GYN Surgeon type. He must have studied many aspects of medicine.

He finished with, "They are aware of that, after running a few scans and MRI's, during the intermediate times you'd awaken. They believe the head trauma you concurred over the fall, against your Sphenoid bone, here on the outside of your eyes, which may have increased latter effects and pressure against your Frontal, and possibly your Temporal bone as well. This is why you are wincing, having headaches, trouble concentrating, etc. These are not permanent results. But just to make sure it's nothing else, we're languishing the results now."

"So... what the hell does that mean? I mean, I get what happened with me, but, does this mean that I'm like, epileptic or whatever?"

Taehyung's dad cleared his throat, pushing Taehyung behind him and taking charge, "When seizures first begin, your body defenses do decrease, making it possible for more of them to occur in the future. It's sort of like opening a brand new window. Your body defenses have become cracked, and though the window can be closed, it'll never have that tight seal you once had. Do you understand?"

"Yes."

"We'll wait a few hours; see how you're feeling, and go from there, on the regards of if you'll be released today or not. At the moment, you seem to be fully aware, vitals are good, and your reactions do not seem to be delayed... We'll just wait it out. We've prescribed to you Gabatril, which is a seizure medication. It's a small yellow capsule, only 4mg, which you will take twice a day. If you feel any symptoms of de-ja-vu, or 'the butterfly effect', as some have described it, then those are possible leading factors of a seizure coming on. It may cause a ricocheting effect, which is back to back, and you may feel as if you're dreaming. Seconds later, you'll 'awake' feeling groggy and maybe even confused. This means that you've experienced another seizure, and you'll need to contact us immediately. Now, this is not to say that you need to be paranoid, but just... observant. Okay?"

"Y-Yes," I nodded.

"Great," he closed his clipboard, whispering to the other doctor for a moment, "well, we'll let you rest, and when we get the results, we'll take the next step."

"Thanks," I said, as they left.

Pursing my lips, I studied the expressions of everyone.

Luna's mom was the first to crack, leaning over and giving me a hug, "I'm glad you're okay, Jiminie. We've all been so worried about you."

"Nah," I said, rubbing her back briefly, "no need to worry over me. I'm strong like a wolf."

"A wolf?" she chuckled, wiping her nose, "why a lion and not something more... burly... like, a bear?"

I grinned at her, "Yeah a lion, like my puppy. She's beautiful. Wolves are fast, brilliant, enduring, and... mysterious."

She smiled, "I like it. It suits you."

After everyone but Yoona hugged me, I glanced at her, swallowing deep, "...You okay?"

She nodded, half-sobbing in Jungkook's shirt. She seemed pretty content, taking comfort in his arms. I didn't like it.

She didn't look like she was able to speak. Or was it, that she didn't want to speak to me?

I wanted to ask her so badly what the results were, and why she was the furthest away from me, but didn't want to cause mass hysteria in the middle of the room.

Taehyung quickly excused himself, asking Yoona and Luna to come with him.

I caught his wrist as they were walking out, "Taehyung? ...Thanks, for... fingering vomit out of my mouth."

He chuckled lightly, shaking his head, "That's what friends are for, right?"

I nodded, pulling in my lips, "Yeah, right." Then I smiled at him as they walked out.

Friends with Taehyung? Who would have thought.

One quick glance at the needle in my hand, and the tubes from it due to the IV, and I groaned, covering my face with my arm.

I just wanted to go home.

-

Yoona POV

I cleared my throat when we entered the hallway, and gave Taehyung a gracious smile as he handed me a Kleenex.

The massive lightening storm outside made us all want to scream. It is freakin' winter. Why in the hell was it storming?

Plus, the past few hours have been an absolute whirlwind, and I think we were all feeling the burns of emotional drainage and mental exhaustion.

Luna gave me a sideways hug, resting her chin on my shoulder, "He's okay now, Yoona."

"I know," I croaked out, in a weakened voice. My throat burned a fiery intensity, and there wasn't a lozenge that has helped me. "It's just... h-hard."

"It is," Taehyung said, nodding in agreement as he tucked his hands in his pockets, "but I have every reason to believe he'll have an easy recovery. My dad says he should be able to go home today, or early morning. It's three AM here, so... maybe in six hours?"

"Go home?" I asked in shock. What the hell were they thinking?!

"But, w-what if it's too soon, w-what if he has another attack, what if it gets worse and no one knows and then something drastic happens and it takes too long to get there and then-"

"Yoona," Taehyung responded, clutching the sides of my arms, "calm down. Just... breathe."

I took a deep breath at the same time Luna and Taehyung did, and let it out slowly, "I'm sorry. I'm just... he's one of my best friends. I'm really worried about him, and with everything else going on, I just... can't... you know... I can't..."

"I know. He's going to be okay. I promise."

I nodded as my eyes began to water again.

The only thing I could think of to respond with was a little hostile but needed to be said. "He fucking better be, Taehyung," I replied through a sob.

"I give you my word." Taehyung pulled me into his arms, giving me a hug.

He let me cry it out on his clean, white, borrowed hospital jacket for as long as I wanted.

Luna was soothingly rubbing my back, looking a little distant.

After a few moments, I pulled away, clearing my throat again, "Luna, what is it?"

"It sucks that we didn't get to see the results," she replied numbly.

I shook my head, "We didn't have time. It wasn't three minutes yet, when he... went down."

"Well we've done the tests here, while everyone was distracted. As soon as they come out, I'll let you know..." He paused, flipping through a clipboard, "but I need you guys to sign these please."

Luna and I took the papers, looking them over.

"Taehyung," Luna groaned, blinking a few times, "I'm exhausted. What does all of this say, I can hardly read it."

"It's a release form from your current doctors. I went in the public records, pulled your files and got them sent over, but I need you to sign these so I can unlock the codes and get into your medical history. Without it, I won't be able to read your results... I know the adults will be lurking around us, watching us, and I do not want them around if another doctor hunts you guys down to give the results. If you sign these, I can read them discreetly and let you know in private."

I twitched my lips, scratching my head, "Unlock our medical history? Like you're going to be able to see all of our pap results, sexual history, and shit?"

"You'll temporary resign me as your choice of doctor. Therefore, yes, I will have full access. But it will remain confidential. You have my word."

Luna didn't mind, quickly signing it and handing it to him. After watching them hug, I took a deep breath, and signed the paper.

"Fourteen," I said, as I handed it to him.

"What?"

"That's how many guys I've had sex with. I know you'll be able to read it on there somewhere if you dig or something, so I just wanted to tell you... I'm a slut, now you know."

Taehyung pulled away from Luna's embrace and gently put his hands on my shoulders, dipping his head down low to look at me eye-level, "Yoona. Listen to me. Despite what you and I have said or done in the past, I know that things are different. We're not the same anymore. And this, this is my profession. I'm not here to judge you, and I hope that you aren't here to judge me. Okay? Your business is your business. I'm just here to make sure that you two are taken care of from now on, regardless of these results."

I nodded, smiling sheepishly. I didn't want to talk anymore than I had to. My throat was really getting on my nerves; I felt like a fire-breathing dragon.

Taehyung began to walk away, but Luna tugged on him, pulling him back.

She sighed, looking into his eyes glumly, "Wait. I have to say something... I've been drinking. Since that night, I've drank quite a bit. I've taken Tylenol, I've jumped and danced and flipped and stressed and had sex and... I don't know what's healthy and what's not, but I know alcohol isn't good..."

Taehyung grinned slightly, caressing her shoulders, "It's okay, even if you are pregnant. A lot of women do this because they are unaware, and are living their lives like normal. If it was a couple months and you were drinking every single night, it'd be different. But you've been the least-drunk out of all of us, even Jennie. You have nothing to worry about."

Luna began to fidget, but decided to take his word for it. She was probably too exhausted to try and argue with him.

"Let's just..." I started, looking into the window of Jimin's room, "when we find out the results, let's just... keep it to ourselves for a while. Okay? I don't want to risk everyone finding out, because it'll be World War III if we do. Deal?"

"Whatever you prefer," Taehyung said, glancing between us.

Luna looked at me and then nodded. "Deal."

"Deal." I said, exhaling.

It made me feel better to know that my privacy could be just that. Privacy.

-

Jennie POV

I opened my eyes and glanced down toward my hip. Yoongi and my hands were intertwined, and I was playing with the tips of his fingers.

Hospitals were so boring. It's amazing what you find interesting when you're here for a long time.

"Yo, what the hell are you two doing?"

We turned to the right, to see Jungkook plopping down on the seat across from us, picking up a Health magazine.

"Relaxing," Yoongi mumbled, burying his face into my shoulder.

"The two of you are cooped up on freakin' hospital chairs, lying down like it's a plush couch. That cannot be comfortable."

"It's after three in the morning. We'll make it comfortable."

Jungkook groaned, slouching down in the chair and hanging his head back, "Will this day ever end?"

"Not likely. We're stuck here forever."

"I'll kill myself."

"That's nice," Yoongi chuckled. He ripped his baseball cap that I stole earlier off of my head and put it over his face, "wake me up when we get to leave."

"It may be a while," Jungkook said, flipping the page. "Still waiting on results."

"It was so weird that he just hit the ground. I know he was smokin' out and stuff, but... all of you seem to be fine."

"I think there was more to it than that, Jennie," Yoongi chuckled, pulling me closer to him on the tiny chairs.

He began to rub the side of his cheek over my left breast, smiling to himself.

Men and boobs. I'll never understand it. "What's your obsession with my breasts," I chuckled, rubbing his head, "they're not even big."

"It doesn't matter how big or small they are," he whispered groggily into my skin, "as long as you can palm it." Yoongi raised his head and uncovered his eyes from the cap, smiling at me, "Do you want to know what you can do with two pounds of fat and make it look pretty?"

I grinned, "What?"

"Give it a nipple."

I slapped him on his shoulder and threw the baseball cap back over his face, "Go to sleep."

He laughed, pulling me sideways, burying his face into the middle of my tank top, "I'm trying."

"Okay, this really hurts. These chairs aren't big enough for us to be positioned like this." I could hear Jungkook chuckling behind me, and it made me laugh too, "Stop it, it really hurts!"

Yoongi released me, making me feel more comfortable, "Fine... I'll just feel lonely without you ... holding me..."

"Don't make me feel bad."

"Oh, I'm gonna."

"Loser," I teased.

"Broad."

I gasped, pulling away from him and trying to sit up.

Of course, he didn't allow this, laughing and pulling me back to him, "I'm sorry, you're not a broad."

"That was horrible!"

"It was a joke."

"Mmhmm."

"You guys, shut up," Jungkook groaned, shaking his head, "there's too much couple-y shit going on lately."

"Yeah, well, you used to be a couple having couple-y shit," I reminded him.

Jungkook glared at me pointedly, "Shut up Jennie."

"I'm just saying... choose your battles."

"Shut it."

"I'm just saying!"

"And I'm telling you to stop saying."

"Fine," I groaned, turning on my side and throwing Yoongi's hand over my face, "wake us up when you know something."

"Surely."

-

Taehyung POV

"Taehyung, where are you going?"

I sealed my eyes and twisted around, cursing beneath my breath, "Just, uh, going for a walk. Stretching my legs."

"Want some company?"

I forced a smile, wrapping my arms around my mother's shoulders, "Sure. Why not."

She threw her arm around my waist as we headed down the hallway, toward the elevator. "You look so good in your little jacket. So professional. Your father and I are very proud of you."

"Thanks mama," I said, punching the ground button to the lobby.

We were silent for a few moments, but I knew it was coming.

She waited until we were outside the doors to actually say it, "So what's the deal with you and Luna?"

I groaned, rubbing the back of my neck, "Mom, let's just... relax out here, okay? I don't want to talk about Luna right now."

She looked up at me, disapprovingly, "...Why not?"

"Because it's my life."

"I'm a part of your life, Taehyung. What's gotten into you?"

I groaned, trying to figure out how to get away from her without looking obvious. I needed to go see the results. It was killing me, waiting here and not knowing.

This was one of the most important moments of my life, and it could be happening today... This sucked.

"Taehyung?"

"Hey, look," I said, giving her a quick hug, "I love you, you're my mom, and I'm glad to see you... But I've got a lot on my mind, some things I need to sort out on my own, and I'd really appreciate some courtesy while I do it."

She sighed into my shirt, before releasing me, "I understand. I just worry about you."

"And I appreciate it, but I'm a big boy."

"I just don't like the idea of Luna re-entering your life and destroying your focus."

"Mom," I warned. Then I exhaled, whispering, "stop."

She raised her hands in the air, "I'm sorry. My bad. Goodness gracious."

I gave her a nod, then turned for the doors, "I'm going back inside."

"Taehyung, wait," she ran after me, grabbing me by the crook of my elbow, "I'm just... concerned."

"Don't be," I replied, walking through and leaving her out there.

I didn't need anyone else being on the anti-Luna/Taehyung ship. I had enough people on the fucker to drown my ass as it was.

This was just like high school. Nothing has changed. People are still going to bitch about it. Like they fucking know.

I growled, turning out of the elevator and onto the Maternity floor.

I swung by the desk, finding a young, short-haired brunette that was giving me the eye earlier. "Hey," I said, giving her a crooked grin that normally allows me to get what I want, "I'm Doctor Kim, from Seattle Medical Center. I was referred by Doctor Manson and Doctor Cherele, for Luna and Yoona. I was wondering if you've received those test results back yet?"

She smiled at me, almost gushy-like, and seemed to forget what I was asking her for as soon as I stopped speaking.

I grinned, forcing myself to appear like I was patiently waiting.

"Oh," she giggled, shaking her head and typing into the computer, "sorry, long day. Um... let's see... oh yes, they called earlier and mentioned the records needed to have a signed release signature for both individual patients faxed over before you could complete the transfer."

I quickly pulled out the signed forms, handing them to her, "Here you go."

She nodded, glancing over them, and then putting them in the fax machine, "Okay, Doctor Kim. The results have a few moments before they will be here, and as soon as they are, I can page you. What is your beeper number?"

I quickly wrote down the one the hospital gave to me on a post it note, and grinned at her, "I'll be downstairs in the cafeteria. Would you like a cup of coffee? I can bring one up for you; I know you've been here awhile."

She smiled politely and googly-eyed, "That'd be very sweet of you. Thank you, Doctor Kim."

"Don't sweat it. I'll be back. Oh, and, as soon as they get in, make sure to page me right away."

"Will do, sir."

Nurses. They're so fucking easy, I thought with a grin, as I swept through the hospital, toward the stairs. Flirt with them, get what you want, get out. And all I wanted was those results. Stat.

"Taehyung, there you are." my dad ran to me, patting me on the back as we entered the stairwell.

"Dad, nice finding you here," I said sarcastically, running down the steps. "What are you spying on me for?"

"What are you doing on the Maternity floor?"

"I thought I asked you first."

"I wasn't... spying. Just, trying to figure out where you were."

"You were spying."

"Taehyung. Come on."

I stopped in the middle of a flight, twisting around, "Look. Jennie asked me to do something for her - which is private, by the way - and I thought I'd handle it nonchalantly. Meaning you aren't supposed to be asking me these questions. I have a doctor/patient confidentiality to uphold."

"Fine," he raised his hands, letting me pass by him toward the next flight, "but this worries me. Jennie, I mean. She's like our daughter."

"It's none of your business dad," I hissed at him, entering the cafeteria, "drop it."

"Sure Taehyung," he replied.

He waited until I collected a few coffees and muffins, and paid for it, before he started up again.

He sat opposite me on the small table, and glared at me.

"What?" I growled.

My dad slammed an empty cup with a blue lid on it, "Piss in this."

"Excuse me?" I coughed.

"Urinate, Taehyung. I'm not playing."

"I don't fucking think so," I replied, gathering the stuff, standing up and walking away from him.

"No, you're going to do it."

"Under who's orders? You're not my doctor."

"No," he yelled, grabbing my arm and twisting me around, "but I am your father, and you have a friend who's upstairs lying in a hospital bed under your watch. Piss in the damn cup, Taehyung."

I glared at him, shaking my head, "I'm not fucking doing it."

"Why? Do you have something to hide?"

"No. Because I'm not in high school, living under your roof, or forced to obey your rules, like you tried to always say back when I was younger."

"You think you're so suave, like the entire world is resting gently around you. You're not the sun, Taehyung. The world does not revolve around you."

"I never said it was! Jesus, what are you on?"

"The question is, what are you on? And all the friends of yours that are cooped up in the cabin that Ron and I bought for our families to share? The one that Ron and his wife live in? I already know what Jimin took; it helped trigger the horrible situation he had to deal with earlier. Do you want that for yourself? For your other friends?"

"Lay off," I said, pushing him back and walking away, almost spilling the coffee all over myself.

"No, Taehyung, you need to listen to me." my dad ran in front of me, stopping my path to the stairwell. "I was sixteen years old when your mom and I had you. Your mother and I sacrificed so much to take care of you, to give you the very best we could, and we struggled for a long time. You cannot even imagine what we had to deal with! And we were alone! We didn't have any support! I didn't spend countless amounts of hours working, and neither did your mother, so you can go and run off, forgot your career, take drugs and screw around and completely push away everything you're working for! You owe us more than that! You're better than this shit!"

"I'm not messing up anything," I said, shaking my head, "Jesus. It was a vacation, dad. You guys act like I ran away from home and went and sought out strippers."

"You're on drugs, aren't you? If you are, your mother and I are going to take away the Children's Hospital your grandfather gave to you. You don't get complete ownership until your twenty-fifth birthday. I will cancel the negotiation."

"No. I'm not. And you're not touching that shit. I worked hard as hell to get that!"

"You're lying to me, Taehyung. I know you're smoking weed and you've been drinking a lot. What else are you doing?"

"I'm. Not. On. Drugs."

"Don't lie to me."

"I'm not." I chuckled, "Would it kill you to believe me?"

"Taehyung, how can I believe you? There was weed in the cabin, you've dumped Yeri, you're back with Luna, you're more aggressive, and I can see it in your eyes that you're lying to me. What is it? Cocaine again? Are you back on that shit? Because, I swear, if you are, I won't be able to help you deal with it again."

I scoffed, glaring at him, "If I was on cocaine, which I'm not, then I wouldn't be asking you for your help. I wouldn't be working my ass off at the hospital. I'd be out there, dealing and snorting. But I'm not. If you can't trust me, then I won't force you. But don't go around lecturing me for shit in the past."

"Why are you with Luna, Taehyung?"

"God, what is this? An interrogation? Because I want to be with Luna, dad. All right?"

"You're going to mess everything up for yourself. Taehyung, you're gonna slip, gonna get that girl pregnant, and it's all going to go downhill."

"What?" I asked, backing up as I eyed him down. "What in the hell are you talking about?"

"Drugs! Pregnancy! Messing up! Luna! I swear, Taehyung, your mother and I will not be able to be behind you if you start slipping under the cracks."

"That's your fucking choice," I hissed at him, passing by and heading up the staircase. "I've got work to do. You might want to try it. Go check on Jimin or something."

-

Jimin POV

"Jiminie? Wake up, honey."

I groaned, trying to cover my ears.

"Jimin, you have a phone call."

"Tell them to hang up."

"It's Lisa."

Sighing, I rolled over, blindly reaching out for the phone, mumbling, "Thanks."

"You're welcome honey. Here it is."

"Hello?"

"Hey Jimin, how are you feeling?"

"Oh, if I had a nickel for each time someone's asked me that tonight. Uh… like ass. How about yourself?"

"Worried for you. I heard what happened. Jennie texted me earlier and told me everything."

"I'm fine," I sighed. "Peachy Keen."

"You don't sound fine. What did they say?"

"Some kind of seizure thing, I guess. I don't really know all the details; I'm just ready to go home. I hate hospitals."

She sighed through the phone, "I wish I could come and see you. Going there earlier about put me in bankruptcy, so I had to find a way to get the money. Once my dad sent me the loan, I tried to book a flight out there, but it was full. The next one isn't until tomorrow night and-"

"No," I replied hastily, cutting her off. I shook my head, exhaling, "Lisa, listen. I appreciate all that, but there really is no need in you coming out here to see me. By the time you get here, I'll be out of the hospital anyway. It's a waste of money, and you have to work, and it's not necessary."

"But I want to be able to help you... be that maternal figure, I guess," she giggled.

"I don't need a maternal figure. I just need..." Yoona. "...something."

"Okay," she whispered.

It got silent over the phone, and I was about to ask if she hung up. Then she whispered, "...I miss you, Jimin."

I swallowed hard, closing my eyes, "...I know."

"Do you, I don't know, maybe miss me too?"

"Sure," I half-lied, scratching my face, "but I've got a lot going on, you know?"

"Sure," she replied. "I know. I guess I'll let you get to it then."

"Okay," I cleared my throat. "I'll call you when I'm back in Seattle."

"I hope so," she sighed. "Bye, Jimin."

"See ya."

Hanging up, I rolled over and handed the phone back to Luna's mom, "No more calls for me, unless it's God himself, demanding I meet him at the Pearly Gates pronto."

She giggled, rubbing my hair as she stood up, "Will do, Jimin."

I nodded, covering my face with my arm.

The dream I was having about two hot secretaries and myself in my office at work was calling my name, and I was trying to get back to it ASAP. I wanted to know what happened with that stapler.

"Jimin?"

I groaned, rolling over on my back, to find Jungkook standing in the doorway.

"Yeah?"

"Can I come in?"

"Sure," I sighed, motioning him to close the door.

He walked around, dragging a chair beside my hospital bed, "You look like hell."

"Thanks," I chuckled. "It's the new thing in style, everyone's doing it."

He smirked, "At least you've got your humor."

"Always," I grinned. "So... what's up?"

"Well, uh," he began to fidget in the chair, chewing on the inside of his cheek, "I just wanted to... I'm sorry."

I laughed, "What for?"

"For... you know... the weed."

"jungkook," I held up my hands, shaking my head, "really, don't. It's not your fault."

"I supplied you the weed."

"Dude, I smoke all the time. It wasn't the weed, or the beer, or the Xany-bar I got from Yoongi or anything else. It was me - or, well, the crack on the coffee table that put me in here. You had nothing to do with it."

He began to pout, "I feel really bad though."

"Really, kook. I'm fine. It's not like I'm dying or anything."

"Yeah," he grimaced. "That's good."

"Yeah," I chuckled.

He looked at me for a moment, blinking. It made me feel weird. I needed to change the subject.

"So, uh, I saw you and Yoona hugging earlier."

He nodded, swallowing hard, "She was pretty upset that you landed in here. I was trying to comfort her."

"Rekindling old flames, perhaps?" I internally prayed that wasn't true.

He shrugged nonchalantly, "Not sure yet."

I gave him a nod, pursing my lips, "Love is difficult."

"I didn't love her."

"Pardon me?"

He sighed, meeting my eyes, "I thought I did, but, I guess now that I didn't. I wouldn't have been able to walk away as easily as I did if I had loved her."

I shrugged slightly, "Well, there are different ways to love someone. Maybe by walking away, you were proving how you love her... Love her enough to show her what you didn't approve of - to be honest with her?"

He smirked, "Maybe. Do you love her?"

I looked at him, mouth hanging open.

"You know," he sighed, "like, at all?"

I nodded, swallowing hard, "You loved her enough to walk away. And... I love her enough to stay."

He furrowed his brows, thinking about my statement. It obviously didn't sink in to him, the realities of my comment, because he just chuckled and stood up, shrugging it off completely, "Right, well, I'm gonna go and hang out with Yoongi. Get to feelin' better."

"I'll try," I replied, pounding his knuckles, "see ya. Tell Yoona I say hello if you see her. She seems to be avoiding me."

He stopped at the doorway, turning to look at me again, "She doesn't want to see you hooked up to machines. She... says it scares her."

I nodded, "I understand that. Tell her though."

"Okay," he replied as he waved and shut the door.

I sighed, throwing my arm over my face.

Covering your eyes makes the room less lonely.

-

Taehyung POV

"So you don't think it was Jimin?"

"No."

"How are you so sure?"

"Because, I know. I have a gut feeling about it."

"So who do you think it was?"

"Do you even have to ask?"

"Taehyung?"

"Bingo."

"Ron, come on," Luna's mom sighed, "we may not approve of him for Luna but to automatically assume it was him is salacious."

"He did it."

I skidded to a stop as soon as I heard my name, and held my breath.

"What makes you so sure?"

"Because he's careless!"

I smirked, shaking my head. Then I put on a straight face and walked around, breezing past them.

"Oh, hey, Taehyung?"

Again, my heels made me stop. I turned around, to face Luna's parents. "Yeah?"

"Um, do you have a second? Ron and I would like to ask you something real quick?"

"Shoot," I exhaled.

"First, why are you working at this hospital?"

"Doing a favor for someone back in Seattle. What's up?"

"Oh. Do you, um, happen to know who distributed the drugs to Jimin?"

Jungkook. "No, I do not."

"Are you sure?" Ron asked, narrowing his eyes at me.

"Yeah," I smirked, shoving my hands in my pockets, "it could have been anyone."

"Are you saying Luna could have done it?"

I glared at him, not buying into his childish entrapments. "No, it wasn't Luna."

"But you said it could have been anyone."

"It wasn't her."

"Then was it you?"

I scoffed, shaking my head, showing him my annoyance, "if it's what you believe, then sure."

"Oh you don't want to get me started on what I believe."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked

"Ron," Luna's mom warned, at the same time.

Ron looked to his wife, biting his tongue.

"No," I said, causing him to glance back at me, "what did you mean by that?"

"You know what it means."

"Why don't you enlighten me? What do you believe?"

He smirked, "I believe you are hopeless. A worthless piece of crap, you don't listen to anyone who isn't complementing you or worshiping the ground beneath you. You're cocky, you're arrogant, and you're stubborn. You take advantage of them. And I believe that you are a poor excuse for anything that would be remotely good enough for my daughter."

"She's not your daughter."

"She is my daughter."

I shook my head.

"Do you really want to start that again?" Ron asked, getting in my face. He quickly noticed that I didn't move this time, and Luna's mom jumped between us, pushing back on Ron's chest.

"Ron, move back."

"Yeah Ron, step back." I mocked her.

He again tried to get in my face, but we were interrupted by my mother, "WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?"

I grinned at Ron, before twisting and tossing my arm around my mom's waist, "Nothing, mom. Ron here was... only asking me a question about the drugs."

"Oh, wake up; he's got you wrapped around his finger!"

"Ron!" Luna's mom shouted, while my mom asked, "What's that mean? What did you ask him?"

"It means you shouldn't let him walk all over you. I just asked him if he gave Jimin the drugs."

"And... why would you assume it was Taehyung?" my mom asked him.

"Because it always is Taehyung. He uses drugs, uses you guys, for your money. He doesn't know anything about the world!"

I glared at him, "Yeah, that's why I am swinging a bat around as a profession, and you worked your ass off to get a full scholarship and study medicine, right? Oh, wait. I'm sorry. I got the roles reversed. You're the one who don't know shit about the world."

My mother ignored us, "Well how do you know it wasn't Luna?"

"Please," Ron scoffed, "she wouldn't do that."

"Oh, but Taehyung would?"

"Yes! He did coke before, didn't he?"

I pushed him back, cursing at him to get out of my face, and the women quickly cut between us, pushing us on separate sides.

My mother was screaming at me, in order to calm me down, but all I heard was him telling me on repeat that he was never going to let me touch Luna. That pissed me off worse.

"No!" my mom shouted, jerking me to her by my smock, "Taehyung, quit! Calm down, don't let him get to you!"

"I'm going to knock him out," Ron shouted over Luna's mom, causing my mother to twist around.

My mom leaped for him, and I quickly grabbed her, pulling her back with me. I had to wrap both arms around her to get her to stand still. She was tiny, but had rage. And people wonder where I get my attitude? My mother.

"Don't you ever threaten him, Ron! He is my son and I will not h-"

I cut her off by covering her mouth and reminding her that we were in a hospital, while Luna's mom kept trying to gather hold of her husband. My mom got me to release her and began to storm away, running smack into Luna, who was rounding the corner.

Both of them toppled to the ground.

I ran over there, pulling Luna up and yelling at my mom,  "Watch where you're going, you could have hurt her!"

"I'm sorry," Luna began apologizing.

"Jesus, watch it!" my mom shouted.

"I'm fine, Taehyung," Luna reassured me, as she reached down to help my mom up. "I'm sorry, are you okay?"

My mom quickly jerked away from Luna's hands after she rose to her feet, and dusted off her white dress slacks. Then she turned and glared at Ron again, "If you want to get anyone under control, I suggest it be your daughter and not my son."

"What?!" Luna's mom shouted, her eyes bugging out of her head.

"Yeah! Your daughter was the one who cheated on my son first. Gave him heartache, spun him around her finger like a wild spool of thread! She made you pity her, give her everything, and you want to talk about my son? Please!"

"ENOUGH!" I shouted, pulling Luna to stand behind me so she didn't get caught in the way of arms swinging around. "If you three want to bitch and moan about this shit then do it by yourself! Luna and I are out of here."

"Taehyung!"

"SAVE IT!" I yelled, pulling Luna to me and walking away from them.

Once we rounded the corner, Luna gripped my shoulders, stopping me.

"Are you okay?" I asked her, holding onto her hips to help maintain her balance. She hadn't eaten in hours; it couldn't be doing well for her.

She nodded, swallowing hard, "Your mother hates me."

"No she doesn't, Ron just pissed her off."

"No, Taehyung. She does."

"Luna."

"Taehyung." Luna looked up at me with her wide, caramel eyes, "Listen to me. She does."

We could hear our parents continuing to argue, and we both frowned.

I sighed, looking at the floor beneath us, "It's been a long day. For all of us. Please don't let this get you down."

She nodded, hooking her index finger around mine, and looking down to our hands, "...Okay."

"I'm serious, Luna."

"All right. I'll try."

"Okay," I kissed her forehead, lingering there for a moment, "I've got to go."

"Where?" she asked, pulling me back to her, "I haven't seen you all night; you've been running around everywhere."

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I'm trying to get everything together and figured out, while avoiding a fist fight."

"Taehyung?" We both turned, to see my mother, hands on hips. "Your father and I would like to see you alone, please."

"Be right there," I said.

Luna tried to reach up for a hug, but I didn't notice until I started to walk away, and had to turn around to meet her again. She slumped down, pouting, "Never mind."

"Sorry," I chuckled, "didn't see you until I moved."

"Sure."

"Don't be like that," I said, winding my arms behind her waist and pulling her pelvis into mine, "I'm sorry."

I rested my chin on the top of her head, squeezing her a little.

She nodded, burying her face into my chest, "Okay."

"'K," I said, kissing her head, "I've really got to go though."

She sighed and gave me a slight nod, "Go."

I kissed the tip of her nose and her cheek once more, then turned to walk away.

-

Luna POV

I had a gut feeling that we were about to go from bad to worse.

As Taehyung turned to walk away, I grabbed his wrists, pulling him back, "Wait a second."

"Yeah?" he asked, looking slightly annoyed.

I frowned at him.

He took a breath, stepping toward me and placing his hands on my hips again, "Yes, my Luna?"

"Something's off with you. Did you see the results yet?"

He shook his head, "Not yet. But the hospital hooked me up with a pager, so as soon as they come in, I'll know. They're pretty distracted, they have a twin cesarean and that car accident on the interstate to deal with, and they're understaffed at the moment, plus with the storm we're having..." His voice trailed off and he shrugged, "I guess that we're not at the top of list of priorities at the moment."

"Can't you just go and do the tests yourself?"

"No, they won't give me lab access."

"Did you ask them? You can talk anyone into anything."

He twitched his lips, pulling me into him, "It's going to be okay, Luna. Please don't worry."

"I want to know, Taehyung."

"So do I," he replied offensively. "But there isn't a whole lot I can do. I don't have jurisdiction here, despite what you may be thinking. If Dr. Sherber found out that I'm even tinkering down here, forging his signature so I can run these tests as a sub-Head... I would be seriously reprimanded. Please don't add any pressure on me tonight."

I swallowed hard, figuring since I bit the bullet, I may as well chew it as well. "I feel like you're pulling away from me. Slowly but surely. You've hardly been around me, and we've been here since, what, one this morning? I know you. I know when something is wrong, and... Something is wrong."

He threw the ends of his smock back, tucking his hands in his jeans pocket, Luna. Nothing is wrong with me."

"You're lying to me."

"How do you know?"

"Because your eyes turn to the left when you lie. They always have. You get a little smile forming on the corners of your mouth, and you can't make direct eye contact with me."

He cleared his throat, bent his knees so he could slump down to my eye-level, and looked me directly in the eyes.

Then he spoke each word slowly, and sarcastically, "Nothing. Is. Wrong. Please. Stop. Worrying. I. Cannot. Have. You. Stressing. Out. On. Me. Okay?"

I glared at him, not bothering to reply.

"Son? Come on, your father is waiting."

Taehyung turned to look at his mom down the hall, then back at me and shrugged, "I've got to go."

I stepped back, motioning for him to leave.

He opened his lips, starting to say something, but quickly shut them. Then he turned and walked away. I watched as he jogged toward his mother, who looked more like something out of Riches magazine, with her white slacks and long, brown, elegant shirt, than a mother at a local hospital. She laughed as he tossed his arm over her shoulder, and she wound her arm around his waist. I could hear her laughing get louder as they turned the corner, fading in the distance. It made my stomach churn.

I didn't believe a word that came out of his mouth earlier. And it wasn't my insecurities talking. It wasn't the drama in the hospital. He didn't know the results, so that couldn't be it... but something is definitely wrong. When he looked at me, his eyes didn't glimmer as much. When he touched me, it felt like it was forced, as if he were trying to 'reassure' me, instead of doing it because he wanted to. When he was around me, he suddenly had other stuff to do.

No, this wasn't insecurity. This was something else.

*&*#!#$^%$^

I decided I needed some 'me' time.

I sat on a picnic table outside and looked up at the stars. I went for a walk. I sat in the cafeteria and drank a hot tea.

I thought about my favorite books, movies, quotes... anything to distract me. Obviously, this didn't work, as Taehyung was all I ever thought about anymore.

An hour later, I caved in, and headed back toward Jimin's room. On the way, I decided to make a stop at the maternity floor. I don't know why, really.

It's not that I believe the results for me will be positive; I don't. I placed a hand on my stomach once I was in the elevator, and it felt empty to me.

But being there, surrounded by the beautiful smell of baby powder, freshness, and new beginning's... I loved it. I was mesmerized. I stepped closer to the windows, wishing that they didn't have the metal blocks covering them. I wanted to see all the babies behind the wall. I wanted to watch them sleep. Wanted to hear them coo.

And I couldn't figure out why I was having these feelings. I'm only twenty-two years old. I have insecurities. I could barely walk without falling, think and talk at the same time, or pay my electric and my water bills in the same month... I'm just a child myself. Was I ready for this, if the results happened to be positive? Could I handle this responsibility? The idea that some little person is going to be looking up to me for guidance, asking me what to do, what to think, what to say, what to believe?

I sighed, pressing my forehead against the glass. Taehyung was weird tonight.

Maybe he was just having a bad day. Maybe he wasn't drifting from me. Maybe it was all really in my head.

The more I stood there, head against the glass, hand on empty belly, I began to miss him. I wanted more than anything for him to tell me what we were now. Wanted him to scoop me in his arms, and reassure me that he was what I needed, and I was what he wanted.

Everything else in my life, I had. I knew I had it. House, car, job... But Taehyung? That answer was still in obscurity. The haunting, destitute, piercing darkness.

Humming a song that was in my head, I headed toward Jimin.

After I climbed the stairs, I rounded the corner, to find Taehyung and his parents in a tight little triangle, whispering words that I could barely make out. Instantly, my stomach began to twist and turn erratically, making tight clenches against my will that about sent me into a heave attack.

I skidded to a stop, peering my head slowly around the corner. Taehyung looked tense and frustrated, his fingers into fists at his sides. His mother had her arms crossed over her chest, and his father was holding onto a clipboard by his side.

None of them looked happy.

"Explain it to me then Taehyung," he was saying, "because I'm having a hard time understanding you right now."

"Would you keep your voice down, dad? This is a hospital."

"I'm aware of that, Taehyung, and I'm not speaking loud. Stop changing the subject; this is what you always do when you don't want to talk about something. Explain."

"What do you want to know?" Taehyung hissed. "What exactly aren't you getting?"

"Why are you with her? Where is Yeri? Why do you keep avoiding my questions and my phone calls?"

"Dad I talked to you for an hour that one day!"

"Avoiding my questions!"

"Oh my..." Taehyung exhaled, shaking his head. "Yeri was never my girlfriend and I don't know how else to stress that."

"Taehyung she was always with you, especially these past couple months!" his mother interjected. "If she wasn't your girlfriend, then what was she?"

"A piece of ass!" Taehyung admitted through a sarcastic chuckle. "What do you think?"

"Lower your tone around your mother Taehyung." His father warned.

"Mom, come on. Yeri is not the girl for me."

"And Luna is? Since you've got it all figured out?"

My stomach was seriously doing some acrobatic moves now, hearing my name fall from them. I knew this conversation was going to lead to me.

"Mom, would you stop throwing Luna into every conversation?"

"No, Taehyung, I won't! I'm worried about you! For crying out loud, remember every single time you guys fought? Every time you argued, threw each other out of the house? That time you got suspended for two weeks for pummeling that kid - what was his name? - That boy, for grabbing Luna's butt! Do you remember that one specific conversation you and I had after that horrible break up? This isn't like you to go back to misery. And that's what you were, miserable."

"Lower your voice, she could be around here somewhere."

"No she isn't. For crying out loud, Taehyung, your mother and I saw her downstairs. Now you're not getting out of this."

"I don't have to explain anything to you."

"Taehyung," his father replied, as his voice got soft. "We are your friends too. We're concerned. Please, just... talk to us."

"What I don't understand is," his mother continued, "though your father and I do not approve of this, why don't you just ask her o-"

"Because I don't want to! Jesus! Okay? Is that what you want to hear?"

"Taehyung," she gasped.

I clutched my hand to my throat, trying to prevent it from closing up all the way. The back of my head began to pulse with pressure. I closed my eyes, regretfully listening more.

Taehyung was talking, and I caught, "...I don't want Luna to be my girlfriend! All right? I'm sorry, but I don't. And, maybe I'm not interested in being her boyfriend. I'm not looking for that commitment."

"Why not?" they asked at the same time.

"Because I don't. Do you remember our relationship back in high school? Obviously you do, which is why you're so hell-bent against us getting together right now. But yeah, you're right. We had some bad moments. I know this, she knows this. It wasn't all easy. No relationship is. But man... I honestly feel sometimes like those four years together were a waste of time. It was pointless! We worked our asses off to stay together, despite parents, despite gossip, despite rumors and everything else... And where did it get us? Nowhere. Nada. Nothing. That relationship was hopelessly doomed from the start."

I slid down the pillar and swiped away angry tears as I tuned out the rest of their conversation.

I heard all I needed to hear.

Taehyung didn't want to be in a relationship with me, after all. That's why he never took it to the next step, never defined us. He said he wasn't looking for a commitment. He said we were a waste of time. He basically said that he wasn't choosing me.

Why would he lie to me? How could he look me in the eyes and give me false hopes and broken promises?

Why would he reassure me that I had nothing to worry about? How could he make love to me? And how on EARTH could he tell me he loved me and convince me he meant it?

Sobbing, I cradled my face in my hands. None of this made sense. But hearing Taehyung - actually listening to his voice that was once soothing and comforting to me - say that he didn't want me...

My heart broke.

And I was back to stage one, just as I was four years ago when we broke up the first time: Alone. Numb. Devoid. Repressed. Abandoned.

I cradled my stomach and looked around, watching the nurses in their scrubs passing through the halls.

Heard the thunder pounding outside.

Listened to the phone ring and the doctors whispering and patients sobbing and machines beeping.

The earth seemed to still be spinning.

But my world? ...It was still.

-

Yoongi POV

This was... awkward.

I glanced at the clock, clearing my throat. Ten am.

And I was sitting here in the cafeteria, with everyone but Jimin.

The parents asked us to all have breakfast with them, no excuses - sparing Jimin, since he was resting.

Why they asked us, I couldn't figure it out. No one was talking.

Taehyung's dad was eating a breakfast omelet, while his mother silently stirred her coffee. Jennie held my hand, fingering her French toast sticks and picking pieces to chew slowly. I ate a sandwich. Jungkook was to my left, chewing down on a pile of mixed food he shoved on the tiny plastic plate. Yoona gawked at him in horror, before turning to drink her orange juice and finish her toast. She didn't seem too hungry. Next was Ron, at the other end from Taehyung's dad, glancing at Luna. Her mom was beside him, stroking her fingers through Luna's hair while she sipped her coffee. Luna just stared blankly at the table, seeming very dazed and uncomfortable. Nauseated, even. Beside her was Taehyung, glasses on top of his hair, stirring cream into his coffee and munching slowly on a bagel.

I cleared my throat, leaning to my girlfriend to whisper in her ear, "What's the deal? Why are they all zombies?"

She shrugged, sticking a piece in her mouth, before turning to me, "Don't know, sweetie. Maybe it's a flu bug that's going around the hospital."

I smirked, shaking my head and whispering back, "Did the bug in question happen to crawl up everyone's ass and die?"

She giggled, but quickly cleared her throat and put on a mask like everyone else, slapping me on my leg.

I massaged the back of her neck, glancing over at Luna, who sat across from me at the table.

She seemed so out of it.

My first reaction was to hop over the table and cradle her, like I would have a month ago.

But I couldn't do that now. Things were different, weren't they? Yes. They were.

I sighed, sipping my water.

I listened as Taehyung cleared his throat, and watched Luna snap her neck in his direction. "Eat, love," he whispered to her, as he threw his arm over the back of her chair, "you need to."

She looked at him, her eyes almost watering over. She ignored his statement all together. Then she blinked away her emotions, and turned, to stare at her untouched orange juice in front of her. She seemed to zone out on it.

I didn't like it. She seemed numb. Dead to the world. Not the Luna I knew and cared for.

I caught a glimpse of Ron gawking at Taehyung. He didn't like him having his arm over the back of her chair, and he certainly didn't like Taehyung "barking orders" to her, as he put it in front of us in the cafeteria, when Taehyung asked if she liked orange juice, before suggesting it'd be a good idea for her to drink some and gain some energy.

He never acted this way before. This was a new side of Ron. I've known him for three years, and he seems to be a very loving, caring step-father. Loved Luna like she was his own.

I understood Taehyung was her ex and he didn't want them back together, but for crying out loud. If his eyes could shoot bullets...

I noticed Taehyung looking up at me, and gave him a slightly comforting, slightly confused smile. I feel your pain, buddy.

He gave me a timid nod, before sipping on his coffee again. "Luna," he whispered, nodding his head to her orange juice.

She sighed, reaching out to pick it up.

As she did, a hand slammed hard on the table, echoing the walls of the hospital cafeteria. It startled all of us, as well as a few people sitting around us, and forced Luna's trembling hands to knock over the full glass, spilling the contents everywhere.

We all began to shuffle around to help clean it up, while Luna began to apologize, but Ron stayed put, glaring at Taehyung. "Stop demanding things to her, Taehyung, or so help me God, you will pay! This is not a Stepford wife. She is our daughter, and you will treat her with respect! Do you understand me?"

"Ron," Luna warned, shaking more, "it's okay. Taehyung was only-"

"No," Ron cut her off, "he needs to learn how to talk to you! He cannot bark orders to you like you're some sort of do-"

"DAD!" Luna shouted, causing us to freeze.

She never called him that before.

Her mother's eyes grew wide, while Taehyung and his dad began arguing with each other, and His mom was yelling at Ron for what he said to her son.

I glanced at Luna, who was still trying to clean up the mess on the table. She couldn't seem to get a hold of herself, or her shaking.

Instantly, I hopped out of my chair and went around, pulling her from it. Taehyung glared at me, but I leaned down and whispered to him, "I'm getting her out of here. We'll be in that empty waiting room across from Jimin's."

He nodded, rubbing his face a few times, before chiming into to argue over everyone else who was shouting.

I couldn't make sense of it. Too many people talking at once, all screaming above each other. Battling for the last word.

After Luna and I were inside the solitary of the elevator, I punched the button to the floor and turned to her, "Are you okay?"

She nodded, wrapping herself in her arms.

"You don't look okay."

"I'm fine," she replied, her voice cracking and barely audible.

I pulled her into me, hugging her with all my might, "I don't believe you."

I could feel her tensing between my arms, putting on her invisible armor like she did before. I wasn't having that shit. We've been friends for too damn long, and I wasn't going to let her slip beneath the cracks again. Helping her get over Taehyung, helping her move on from the Sean incident... I could help her with whatever was going on this time too.

That's what I was here for. Regardless of whether or not we ended up together.

Once we got into the empty waiting room, I closed the door and sat her down. Quickly sliding over a chair, I sat in front of her, placing my hands on her knees.

"Talk to me, Luna."

She opened her mouth and moved it like she was talking, but no words came out. She didn't try to speak a second time.

I watched as a salty tear overflowed her lid, then slid down her cheek, resting to hang at the bottom of her chin.

It crushed me.

"Luna, what happened?" I whispered, wiping her tear with my thumb as I caressed her face. "Talk to me sweetheart."

She sobbed, wiping more tears away with the back of her hand.

Her eyes began to bounce, from her arms cradling her stomach, to the carpet, to the frames on the wall, to the windows, then back down to her arms.

"He, uh..." she whispered, bouncing her legs against the chair, "...doesn't want us."

"Who?" I asked.

She looked up at me weakly, slouching her shoulders over, "Taehyung. He doesn't want... US."

"Us?" I asked, motioning between her body and mine.

She shook her head, looking down at my hands on her knees, "Me and him."

"That makes no sense. When did he say that?"

"About an hour ago," she choked out. Her voice was awfully weak.

"No," I shook my head, rubbing her knees, "Taehyung would never say that."

"He did," she whimpered. "...Right from the horse's mouth."

"You must have misunderstood him. ...He loves you, Luna."

She scoffed, swiping more tears, "Love? Yeah. He said I was a waste."

"What?" I asked, unable to disguise my shock. "Why would he say that?"

She shrugged, her tears flowing more frequently now, "I don't know! If I knew, I wouldn't be sitting here crying right now. I would have accepted it and moved on. But I don't know, I don't..." Her voice trailed off as her tears blocked her sound. She sobbed, rubbing her face. "I don't know what happened to him."

"Luna," I sighed, caressing her arms, "when did he say this?"

"'Bout an hour ago."

"Did he tell you to your face?"

"No," she exhaled, sniffling. "He's being a coward about it."

"Then... how do you know he said that?"

"I overheard him talking to his parents in the hall."

"Does Taehyung know you heard them talking?"

She shook her head, clutching her throat.

I frowned. "Have you confronted him about it?"

"Yoongi!" she shouted, slapping her hands angrily on her legs, "look at me! I'm a wreck. If I can barely talk to you without crumpling over, how do you think I'd be able to look at him? To face him and his words? To watch him tell me he doesn't want me?"

Luna started crying, bending over and tugging on her hair, "...I'm weak again. Like before."

The one thing I was never able to explain was, how I could feel her emotions. This was more than just empathy and sympathy combined... Every thing she was feeling... that clenching in her heart, that closing in her throat, that burn in her eyes... I felt it too.

And I wanted to take it away from her. I wanted to heal her.

I pulled her closer to me, hugging her tight, "Luna, there must be a misunderstanding. You must have heard it and assumed, which I don't blame you for, but... Taehyung loves you. I know it, everyone knows it. It's written all over his face, every single time he looks at you."

She was crying against my shoulder, her tiny fingers clutching pieces of my shirt in anger.

"Shhh angel," I whispered, rubbing her back. "It's going to be okay."

"I heard him Yoongi. He said I was a waste, that he didn't want me as his girlfriend. He said our relationship back then was pointless... The list of negatives goes on and on."

I rested my chin on her head, rocking her side to side slowly, "I promise, Luna. I don't th-"

"Stop Yoongi," she whimpered, broken. She pulled me to her, throwing her arms around me as she continued her tearful assault on my shoulder. "Just stop. It's over."

"No," I replied. "I don't think so. Something's boiling under the surface of that, something you missed, perhaps?"

She shook her head, "I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me. Despite how much it kills me to think of a life without him in it... I don't want that."

I nodded, not replying. The only comeback I had was, now you know how I felt when I cared for you, but I could never say that to her. That was water under the bridge.

So instead, I did what I used to do when she'd cry on me: I kissed her head, her cheek, her shoulder... I brushed through her hair with my hands...

I cradled her in my arms and let her get it all out.

Because Luna was too beautiful to be so broken.

-

Jennie POV

I ran inside the hospital, skidding on the bare floor with my ballet flats.

If it hadn't been from the nice man wearing the fireman outfit, I would have eaten the reception desk.

I dropped everything I was holding, and we both bent down to pick it up at the same time, banging our heads together.

"Ow!" I cried, falling on my butt and holding my forehead.

"I'm sorry ma'am, are you okay?"

I nodded, as he handed me my things.

We quickly stood back up, and I blew out a gust of wind, "Sorry about the collision, but I've got to run! Hope I didn't give you a concussion!"

The elevator seemed to take forever and a day to get to the eighth floor.

Again, I slid when I hit the bare floor.

Damn storms outside weren't doing anything for me today.

I breezed past a few parents, and someone grabbed my waist, pulling me into a broom closet area.

I squealed, twirling around.

"TAEHYUNG!" I gasped, slapping him hard, "Don't do that! Haven't you ever seen that episode of Grey's Anatomy where that killer was on the loose?! I about went kung-fu on you!"

"Sorry," he replied, as I tossed him his grey hoodie.

"I got there, got back, got everything and they didn't even notice I was gone, I don't think," I exhaled. "And I got the results. Yoona's-"

"I know," he replied, pulling off his white doctor smock, and throwing the grey hoodie on. "I finally got the results from all the lab work."

"So you know that Y-"

"Yes," he cut me off again. "I know."

I nodded, looking into his green eyes, "So, uh, what do you think about it?"

He shrugged, shoving his hands through the front pocket of his shirt, "Jimin's going to be released this hour."

"Yeah?" I squealed. "Good. This place is so... plain. It's driving me crazy. We've spent so much time here, I was about to start painting the walls."

He chuckled, scratching his head, "That sounds like typical Jennie."

"Taehyung?" I asked, clutching his bicep, "Are you okay?"

He closed his eyes, nodding. His face showed a lot of... tension.

"Are you sure? Because you're not happy, and you should be happy, knowing that you're not goi-"

"I'm fine," he said, giving me a hug. He took the home pregnancy tests from my purse and snapped them in half, before opening a roll of paper towels and wrapping them in them. "We need to get out of here. Was there anyone in the hall that we know?"

"No, but your mom and Luna's mom are around the corner, making up from earlier, I guess."

"Okay. Let's go."

We quickly escaped the smelly broom closet and acted like we'd been in the hall for awhile.

"By the way," I said, turning to face my best friend again, "remind me to smack you when we get back into the cabin for telling your dad that you were running pap tests on me, okay? Because I owe you one."

He chuckled, messing up the top of my hair, "Yeah yeah."

"Oh, and Taehyung?"

He turned, sticking his hands in his jean pocket.

"Talk to your mom. She loves you."

He looked at me, in thought. Then he gave me a nod, and turned back around, heading toward the mothers.

I, however, needed to find Yoongi.

I had one hour to create my fantasy of secret hospital bed sex.

Public indecency was about to be better here, than in a dressing room. I couldn't wait!

-

Taehyung POV

Standing directly behind my mother, I cleared my throat.

Both her and Luna's mom stopped gossiping about Jimin and whatever else, and turned to face me.

I smiled at them.

My mom giggled, while Luna's mom was trying to figure out if I was going to go off or tell a joke.

"Can I steal her away from you?"

She nodded, not saying anything as she smiled.

I gave her a nod, before pulling my mom to my side.

"What's the matter, baby? When did you change?"

"Had an extra sweater in the Jeep. Jennie went down and got it for me."

"Did you get all your work done here?"

"Yes. Are they signing the release papers for Jimin?"

"Close to it. Your father is in there discussing with the doctor right now about further Seattle arrangements."

"Do you think the seizures will be more repetitive now?"

She sighed as we stepped outside on the roof of the hospital, and leaned over the side, "Let's hope not."

I gave her a nod.

We stood in silence for a few moments, staring up at the dreary cloud coverage.

"Another shitty day I presume," I began.

She nodded, rubbing my back, "Most likely."

I took a sip of my coffee and cleared my throat, "Mom, I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Sure baby."

I took a deep breath, "About that night that Luna and I broke up. The last time."

My mother's jaw clenched as she watched a black bird in the sky, "Yes?"

I sucked in my top lip, buying some time to think.

I didn't know where to begin.

FLASH!~~~

"Taehyung?" My mom asked as she zipped up her jacket, "What are you doing out here?"

I took a heavy swallow, looking up at the stars in the sky. My back was cold, lying on top of the hood of my car, and it was beginning to get uncomfortable.

But I didn't care. How can anyone care when they're broken?

"Baby?"

I took a swig of Jose, and wiped my face on the back of my hand, "Nothing."

"Is that alcohol?"

"Yep," I replied coldly.

She sighed, climbing up on my hood beside me. "Why are you drinking again?"

"Why not?" I scoffed.

"Taehyung."

"Mom, please. Don't fucking bark at me, okay. Just let me drink."

I could hear her sigh. "Did you, uh, talk to her?"

"Yep."

She turned to face me, but I wouldn't look at her. "And?"

I pursed my lips, focusing on one star, "It's over, mama."

"She wasn't buying it then?"

I shook my head, "Go ahead and laugh, let's hear it."

"Baby I would never laugh at you. I'm sorry that you're going through this, but I promise that y-"

I cut her off by launching up into a sitting position, and tossing the left-over contents in the glass bottle against the garage door, "Just SHUT THE FUCK UP! Okay? Mom, can you do that for me? Stop fucking promising me shit, because it doesn't help. You can't promise me anything. How can you promise something about someone else? You don't know their intentions, their thoughts. You don't know their feelings. How the fuck can you guarantee me shit?!"

"Taehyung," she exhaled, holding her hands in surrender mode, "please calm down."

"Don't tell me to fucking calm down," I spat, sliding off the hood and pacing around the front, "my life is over."

"Your life isn't over baby," she pleaded, looking over at me with sad eyes. "It's hard, I know it's hard, but it's not over."

I turned to her, fire blazing from my eyes and ears.

"Don't tell me that you know," I spat venom at her. "Because you don't know. You don't know how this shit feels. This pain, this hurt, just fucking..."

I began to clutch my jacket over my heart, balling pieces of the fabric in my fist so tight I could rip it to shreds with my hands, "...this aching shit. You don't know anything about this."

I watched as my mother fought back tears, and it made me hurt worse.

"She doesn't fucking want me," I replied, kicking the top of the broken bottle across my driveway. "She said it, loud and clear. It's fucking OVER."

"Baby, listen to me," my mom replied, sliding off my hood and running to cradle my face in her hands, "I know you're upset, and you have every right to be. Ron should have handled it differently, he shouldn't have hurt you and called the cops, and your father is taking care of that now, okay? But listen to me son. I know you're heartbroken, I can see it in your eyes. But being angry isn't going to make her come back to you, okay? You need to give her time, and yourself time. You both just... need time to think. To recess. Okay?"

I slumped over drunkenly, and sat down on the cold pavement.

My mother knelt in front of me, wiping away my stupid fucking tears I was releasing.

"I hate her," I whispered into my mom's arm. "I fucking HATE her for this shit."

"Shhh, it's going to be okay."

I shook my head, "It's not. Don't you see it, mom? It's not going to be okay."

"Shhh, I've got you."

"Stupid crying like a fucking baby," I mumbled into her jacket, "fucking crying shit. What the fuck."

"It's okay to cry angel."

I shook my head again, fighting back more threats of anger that wanted to boil up and make me start fucking swinging, "I'll never forgive her, or myself for this shit."

"Shhh, Taehyung. Don't say that."

"I won't."

My mom let me cry in her arms, let me curse and swear and throw swings and everything else.

She let me rampage, break shit in her kitchen, go off on her and my father.

She let me vent and miss a week of school, despite finals.

...She let me figure out a way to breathe without Luna.

And though I was numb, I remember her coming into my bedroom that same night.

And I told her something we've never forgotten: "Mom, promise me something. No matter what I do or say. No matter how much I beg and plead and throw tantrums and say it's what I want... Promise me that you'll never let me get that close to Luna again. Ever. I never want to put myself in a position like this again. If I make it out of this hell, just... promise me you'll never let me fall for her again."

She put my head in her lap, brushing her fingers through my hair, "I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy, baby. I'll do my part. I'll fight for you."

"Promise me."

She bent down, kissing my temple, "I promise baby."

~~~FLASH!

My mom took a deep sigh, snapping me back to the present.

I reached over, rubbing her back, "I know you know what I'm thinking about."

"I do."

"And that's why you're against Luna, isn't it?"

My mother turned to face me, her eyes watering slightly, "I don't want to fix my broken son again, Taehyung. It took you years to move on from her. And as soon as you did, when your father and I thought we were all in the clear with that pessimistic past and everything included... it's crept up on us again."

I pulled her close, giving her a hug, "Mom, I'm not seventeen anymore. I know what I said and asked of you, but I'm thinking clearly and looking with both eyes open-"

"I can't do it, Taehyung."

"Please trust me," I begged.

She shook her head, "You weren't seventeen when you started doing heavy drugs. You weren't seventeen when you drank yourself into a stupor for two months after seeing Luna at that baseball game with Yoongi, when she didn't know you were there. You weren't-"

"I get it," I cut her off.

"Those things that happened, they weren't four years ago. They were one year ago."

I frowned, "I know."

"Do you see what I'm getting at here?"

"Do you see what I'm getting at, mom? Why would Luna be in my life if she weren't meant to be in there, for some reason?"

"To make you stupid."

"Mom," I sighed, rubbing her arms.

"Taehyung," she held my face between her hands, forcing me to look at her, "I love you so much. You're my arms and my legs, every beat of my heart. You're my baby, you know? My only son. It's my job as your mother to protect your heart. It's my job as a mother to protect you in any way that I can."

I kissed her forehead, and gave her a tight hug, "I'm sorry for what I put you through."

She soiled my sweater with her tears, and this time, it was me letting her cry it all out.

All her worries, her fears, and her heartache from all the fucking stupid ass shit I put her through.

And when she was done, I brushed the hair from her shoulders, and swiped the tears from her eyes, "I love you mom. No matter what, okay?"

She sighed, wiping mascara from beneath her eyes, "Why does that sound like something someone says before they leave for good?"

I chose not to answer that. Instead I reassured her that I'd be there for her and dad always, and that I was going to make the best decisions for myself.

I'm not sure if she believed me or not.

But it had to be said.

-

Jimin POV

"Hey you."

I opened my eyes, to find Yoona's face about an inch from mine.

I wasn't expecting that, so I pushed back into the pillows, blinking a few times.

She giggled.

"Hey," I groaned, rubbing my eyes, "what time is it?"

"It's around three now."

"AM or PM?"

"PM."

"Mmm," I stretched out, wincing at the needle in my hand, "when the fuck do I get to go home?"

"Soon."

I looked up at her, and brushed her blonde hair off her left shoulder, "It's about time you brought your skinny ass in this room to see me. I was beginning to think I stunk or something."

"Well you do," she teased, "but they disconnected that one beeping machine and a few others while you were resting, so it made it easier to come in here."

"I see."

We looked at each other and smiled simultaneously, causing us to laugh.

"What?" I asked.

"What?" she giggled.

"What?" I asked again, poking at her leg.

She blushed, "What?"

We laughed again.

She looked so beautiful, wearing holey jeans and an oversized sweatshirt she only wore to bed back in Seattle.

"You look nice in normal clothes," I said.

She slapped me on my arm, then thought about my statement, and grinned at the compliment, "Thanks Jimin."

"I mean it. It's nice to see you without fancy shit on all the time."

"Just like it'd be nice to see you in a bright color for once, mister I-wear-dark-colors-twenty-four-seven-because-it-makes-me-look-tough?"

I shrugged, "Sure. I'll let you dress me in something bright. You can bury me in it, that way I'll be dead and can't complain."

She giggled, "I'll remember that."

We sat in silence for a few moments.

"Jimin?" she asked, as she picked up my hand, turned it upside down, and began to run lazy circles on the inside of my palm, "Have we ever said 'I love you' to each other before?"

My heart skipped, "We say... 'I heart you' and stuff. I'm sure we have and haven't noticed, but nothing in particular I can think of."

She furrowed her brows, confusion written all over her face.

"What is it?" I asked, sitting up in the bed.

She exhaled, turned to face me, and swept my face up in her hands, "Look at me."

"I am. I can't look anywhere else when you're squeezing my face like this."

She fought back a smile, and pulled me closer to her, "I do love you Jimin. You're probably my most favorite person in this entire world, and I don't want that to change."

I smiled, feeling the warmth in my chest envelop my body. "That's good."

"Do you love me too?"

I studied her expression, licking my lips in thought.

I had to really think about how I wanted to answer that question, without telling her how I felt about her and scaring her away.

She frowned, mistaking my silence for denial.

I quickly shook my head, cradling her face in my hands, "Yoona, look at me."

"It's okay if you don't," she began to stammer, shaking her head, "I underst-"

"I do love you," I exhaled.

She looked at me, her bright eyes piercing through my body. GOD, did I love her.

It made my heart burn, thinking about the feelings I enveloped and hid from her over these years.

We stared at each other, holding each other's faces in our hands.

I wanted to kiss her so fucking badly, I could taste her on my lips.

Taking a deep breath, I pulled her closer to me, my mouth a few inches from hers. "I do love you Yoona," I whispered. "You are my favorite person. ...Even when we bicker and fight... none of that stuff matters. It doesn't matter if you like fucking Gossip Girl and I don't, or I like to watch fucking Texas Hold'Em matches on television and it annoys you... I don't care about any of that. We've had so many good memories... I don't think there's a whole lot about you that I don't know, and vice-versa."

She tilted her head, smiling sweetly at me, "Like what?"

I grinned at her, brushing her bottom lip with my thumb, "Like... your favorite color is white. You eat spaghetti without any hamburger in it - just sauce. ...Like the fact that you run water when you're in the bathroom because you have an OCD about people hearing you pee. And... you only purchase Honey Oat Shampoo because you say it's best for your hair, though it costs half your paycheck. You only eat the green grapes, and you love celery with ranch dressing. ...You love blueberry muffins and bread, but hate blueberries. You love tomatoes on tacos, but not on hamburgers..."

She giggled, sniffling.

"...You chew on the right side of your bottom lip when you're thinking. You tap your fingernails on the desk when you're aggravated at the computer... You smile whenever you see Chase Crawford on television and get really angry whenever one of those girls on the TV kiss him..."

She laughed louder, her beautiful teeth shining as her tongue bounced in her mouth.

She looked so happy in front of me. It made me happy.

I tucked some stray blonde hairs behind her right ear, lifting her chin with my left hand as I licked my lips. "...You secretly wonder if you're good enough, but know inside your heart that you are... In fact, I think you're better than anyone else..."

She sighed, clenching my arm with her fingers, then looking up at me.

"... and," I whispered, brushing her pink cheeks with my fingers while my heart began to bounce inside of my throat, "...I knew you loved me before you ever had to say it."

A whimper escaped her lips, and that light around her happy face dimmed with her frown, as she tilted her head down.

"Just as you knew I loved you before ever having to ask me...," I whispered, ending my proof.

"Oh, Jimin," she whimpered, covering her face in her hands, "I'm such a mess."

"No you're not."

"I am," she nodded, hiding her face more, "I'm so ...confused."

"It's okay to be confused sometimes," I reassured her. "It cleanses your soul."

She shook her head, straightening her emotions back to a calm. Then she took a deep breath, and let it out slowly.

I knew it was time. Time to tell her how I felt. Time to tell her that she was the one for me, and I'd do whatever it takes to-

"Yoona?"

Fuck.

She turned, clearing her throat, "Hey, Jungkook."

"Can I talk to you for a second?"

She nodded, and stood up.

I caught her by the wrist, pulling her down to me, "Yoona, just... be smart, okay? No matter what. Open your eyes and think things through."

She smiled weakly at me, "I always do." Sure you do.

I watched her walk out, and Jungkook toss his arm over her shoulders as the door closed.

God, get me out of this hospital.

-

Jungkook POV

I threw my arm over her shoulders, pulling her into my side.

"How you holding up?" I asked her as we breezed through the hallway.

She shrugged, not bothering to wrap her arm around me, "Okay, I guess."

"Are you happy we're almost out of here? Damn hospitals make me stuffy."

She gave me a nod, not bothering to answer.

"You okay?"

"Yeah."

"You seem distant or something."

"How would you know?" she mumbled under her breath.

I stopped us by the soda machine, pulling her in front of me, "What's that mean?"

Yoona looked up at me, frown permanent on her face, "It means, how would you know how I seem, when you barely got the chance to know the real me?"

I furrowed my brows at her, "Where did that come from?"

"What?"

"The bitterness. You're not making any sense. Of course I would know."

"How?"

"Because..." I shrugged, trying to come up with something, "you were my girlfriend?"

She scoffed, shaking her head.

Her attitude was not warm at all, and it was pissing me off, "What? What did I do?"

"'Because you were my girlfriend'?" she quoted me, tossing her hands on her hips. "Tell me, Jungkook, was that a statement or a question?"

"Uh... which part?"

"The whole thing."

I shrugged, "I dunno."

"You can't even answer a question without asking another one. It's like you're not sure of me at all, or yourself for that matter?"

"Yoona, as per usual, I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Of course you don't."

"Huh?"

"Of course y-"

"I heard you, I just don't... you're confusing the fuck out of me right now. And none of us have hardly gotten any sleep, we've all been wallowing around this fucking hospital for a day, and you're not making it easy on my brain here."

She crossed her arms over her chest, glaring up at me, "What did you want to talk to me about?"

"I don't know if I even want to bring it up, with your attitude."

"What, Jungkook? What is it?"

I glowered back at her. She was seriously pissing me off. I was debating whether or not it was even worth it.

"Speak," she hissed at me.

I took a deep breath, "I was going to tell you that I think I made a mistake in letting you go..."

That made her glare turn downright evil. She looked at me like I just slapped her across the face.

"What?" I chuckled, "What did I say wrong now?"

Again she quoted me, "You were going to tell me that you thought you made a mistake? WERE, Jungkook?"

"Yeah."

"And now you're not?"

"Well, technically I did, but... your attitude isn't making my decision any more rainbow-y."

"You are un-fucking-believable!"

I grinned at her, "I get that a lot."

"I don't mean it in a good way, you bastard."

"Well, I'm sorry for trying to lighten the mood," I replied hastily, "but you're acting like a bitch and it's not helping me."

"Don't call me a bitch."

"I didn't," I scoffed, "I said you're acting like a bitch - which you are. I didn't do anything wrong to you. I've been nice all day, and I came here to apologize-"

"Just save it," she shouted, cutting me off.

I pulled my neck back, looking at her in shock. "Save what?"

"Save your bullshit."

"Yoona, look, I came here in hopes of reuin-"

"Jungkook," she replied, looking down to the ground, "what's my favorite TV show?"

"Uh..." I scratched my head, "that dumbass Hills show?"

"No. My favorite color, or my favorite food?"

"I... honestly have no idea."

"That's right," she replied, "you don't."

I took a step back, crossing my arms over my chest, mirroring her posture, "...What's this about, Yoona? Are you saying that I don't love you? That I'm not sorry for breaking up with you? Are you trying to put words in my mouth, because I don't make up with anyone, and I'm seriously trying here."

She nodded solemnly, before slowly looking up at me. And her expression... her fucking eyes... they were empty.

I immediately wanted to hold her, but I fought that thought. She would probably slap me if I tried.

"Tell me what I can do, Yoona."

She cleared her throat, "...If you really cared, you wouldn't have to ask."

"I do care. I wouldn't be standing here talking to you if I didn't."

She sniffled, clearing her throat as she looked down at my shoes.

"Tell me. Yoona, tell me, so I can fix this."

"You can't," she whispered.

"Why can't I?"

She stood in silence, and it about killed me.

I hated fucking silence.

Silence was never good, and it filled the entire building.

"Why can't I?" I repeated.

She took a deep breath, and looked back up at me, directly in my eyes, "...Because you don't know me at all."

I was stunned.

Mouth hanging open, eyes frozen... The whole fucking kit-and-caboodle.

Stuck.

"I...uh..." I stammered, trying to figure out a way to argue with her and defend myself.

"It's not going to change things," she said, fighting back tears. "We both knew it, deep down inside... It just took me a bit longer to realize it. To admit it."

"Yoona," I whispered, looking down to the ground.

My brain wouldn't work.

I felt really fucking nervous suddenly.

"I, uh, really want to make this work," I tried.

She shook her head, "It won't. Like you said that night you broke up with me... we're not going to work."

"Why?" I whispered.

She licked her lips, looking around the room, before finally resting on me again, "Because I didn't know you either."

"But this can't be the absolute en-"

"It is."

"Yoona."

"Jungkook," she smiled, half-heartedly. "Please."

We looked at each other, frowning.

This was fucking sad, and I was in the middle of it.

I've never been here before.

And here really fucking hurt.

I normally talk myself out of situations like this; find a secret passageway to avoid drama at all costs...

And here I was, dwelling in this shit.

It wasn't fair.

"Hey guys," Taehyung's dad shouted, making us look at him. "Jimin's released. Time to go."

I gave him a nod of acknowledgment, and pulled her to me, "Yoona, please, just let me try and prove that I care for you."

She hugged me back, but it wasn't a powerful hug. "I care for you too," she whispered. "But caring isn't enough."

"Please."

"No."

"Please."

"Jungkook..." she replied, slouching over as she let me go, "...no."

I looked down to her, my eyes as sad and empty as hers now.

"Just..." she shrugged, looking toward the room. Her voice was soft and cracked. "...Let's call it as it is. Over. You don't know me. So... let me go, okay?"

She opened my hand, forcing me to let go of hers. The she turned, walking away from me. ..From the last chance of us, in her book.

And it really fucking sucked.

-

BACK AT THE CABIN

Jennie POV

Being back here with the parents was just weird.

The house seemed more crowded with these four people, than it did with all our friends around New Year's.

I felt like I had to inspect every inch of the cabin, to make sure Taehyung's dad doesn't see any panties lying around, or tequila bottles, or beer bottles, or cigarettes, or anything else...

And then I felt I had to inspect it again, to make sure Ron didn't find any baggies full of weed, pills, birth control pills, etc.

Yeah. I worry.

Sue me.

This was scary!

Yoona and Luna helped Jimin to the bedroom, so he could take a shower and relax. Jungkook and Yoongi began unhooking cords to the Xbox 360 and all their other game consoles, for the road trip ahead of us the day after tomorrow. Taehyung sat down on the couch, looking like he was in deep thought. His mom and Luna's mom were outside on the patio, by the fireplace, talking in private. And I had no idea where Ron was.

I was running around, scooping up ash trays before Luna's mom saw them. They didn't like smoking in the house.

When I finally got to where I felt I could relax without having to check the bottom of everyone's shoes for empty condom wrappers, I sat beside Taehyung, resting my head on his right shoulder. I held out my hand to him, and he half-smiled, dropping his palm into mine.

"You're sad, aren't you?" I asked him in a whisper.

He shrugged, "Not sad. Luna's acting weird though and I don't like it."

"Do you think it's because of the results? Have you told her yet?"

He sighed, "Yeah, I told her kind of briefly before we got in the car. I tried to talk to her on the way here, but we were in the back seat of my mom and dad's rental car, and she kept hushing me and telling me that we'll talk about it later. You think she'd be relieved, you know? To have some answers... but she almost acts like she didn't want to know."

He frowned, placing his head against mine, whispering, "I'm scared, Jennie."

I squeezed his hand, "It's gonna be okay. It's just a rough patch, with everyone being here now, and the parents butting into everyone's business."

"Fucking tell me about it," he scoffed. "They have the mind-set that we're all in high school still. And normally, when I'm around adults, I'm cool and mature and, you know, proof that I can actually act my age... But ever since they showed up, I've been defensive and yelling and angry... And that's not me. Well, I take that back. It's not me since I've been back with Luna... and I feel myself sort of, I don't know, slipping back to how I was back in Seattle, and ... Frankly, it's quite depressing."

Rubbing his arm, I nuzzled against his warm hoodie, "You're not that person anymore. It's been a long couple of days, but trust me... I won't let you slip back into him again."

He sighed, "It's all ready happening."

"Stop it."

"It is, Jennie. I can feel it."

"Taehyung, the fact that you recognize your momentarily inner-douchebag immaturity proves that you're not that person. You can tell the difference. You see it."

"I also see Luna pushing away from me."

"Well..." I exhaled, "maybe that's because she feels you're pushing from her too? Ever since we've been at the hospital, I noticed you two were barely near each other, and the one time you were, Ron threw a catastrophe about you asking her to drink some orange juice. And think about it, Taehyung? Luna was going through some extreme emotions, waiting for these results. And you weren't there for her. And I realize you had your reasons-"

"Yeah like keeping the fucking drama away from her," he scoffed, cutting me off. "I wanted to take all the heat for us."

"But," I continued, "maybe she didn't see that. Maybe she saw it as you avoiding what may be in your guys' future? Maybe she saw it as you copping out on her? Avoiding her? Distancing yourself?"

"That's not what I mean to do."

"Well, Taehyung, you're a guy and she's a girl. Guys think very closed-in the box. Women, we think inside the box, outside the box, and speculate every single square inch of the box. We worry, we over-analyze, we pick shit apart. You need to talk to her."

"I know."

"So go do it."

He frowned, "I'm scared of her."

Giggling, I replied, "Scared of your girlfriend?"

"She's not my girlfriend, Jennie," he spat out.

I sighed, turning my head to him and jerking his face to me by his jaw, "Then what the hell is she to you, Taehyung?"

He started to open his mouth, but we heard doors slam, and he shut it.

"Ron just stay out of it!" Luna shouted as she ran down the stairs.

Ron was right behind her, "I won't stay out of it, Luna. I go into your bedroom to apologize to you for my behavior, and find you crying on the bathroom floor and-"

"That was my business!" Luna shouted, her face red in anger, humiliation, and tears.

Taehyung and I popped off the couch, while her mom ran to them, getting to Luna before us.

"What's going on?" Taehyung asked, pulling Luna to him.

She tried to pull away, but he held on to her, "Baby? Talk to me, tell me what's going on?"

"Unhand her, Taehyung," Ron warned.

"No, just let me talk to her-"

"She's trying to get you to let go of her, so let GO!"

"Ron," her mother shouted, "calm down!"

"I'm fine, Taehyung," Luna said, still semi-trying to pull away from him, "please let me go."

He didn't. Ron was shouting above her light voice, telling Taehyung to let her go before he hit him. Of course, this upset everyone, and Taehyung's parents joined the party.

The entire house erupted into a shouting match, Luna and Taehyung trapped in the middle of the circle. Lunq had her arms between hers and Taehyung's body, half pushing away, half pulling him to her, and she looked scared and extremely upset, while Taehyung had his arms wrapped completely around her, his left hand holding her head to his chest, covering her exposed ear from all the screaming.

I couldn't even make out what anyone was saying. A lot of language and shouting, but no visible words.

Yoongi ran up behind me, asking me in my ear if I was all right. I nodded, trying to grab Taehyung by his hoodie, to help pull them out of the middle.

Of course, this upset his mother, who rudely asked me to let go of him. She never talked to me like that, but I knew she wasn't meant to aim her anger at me, just lashing on anyone who appeared against her son at the moment. Therefore, I didn't take it too personally.

"HEY!" his dad shouted, before whistling a piercing sound.

We all stopped talking at once.

"Okay!" his dad shouted, stepping in the middle of Taehyung and Luna, and Ron. "This has got to stop, this is getting ridiculous!"

He turned to Luna, who's face was covered protectively by Taehyung's hand, "Luna, are you all right?"

She nodded, sniffling in Taehyung's sweater, "Y-yeah."

"Taehyung?"

"I'm fine Dad," Taehyung replied stiffly, glaring at Ron.

"Luna," Ron shouted angrily, "we need to talk."

"I don't want to talk to you guys!" Luna sobbed. "Just leave me alone! You shouldn't have came back early!"

"Taehyung, please let go of our daughter," her mom said.

"Mom stay out of it!" Luna interjected.

"Shhh," Taehyung replied, pulling her even closer to him, "what happened angel?"

"Nothing, I was just upset and he fucking stormed in there and started making accusations that you and I got into a fight, and that you hurt me, or put your hands on me and the-"

"What?!" Taehyung shouted, foaming at the mouth.

Oh shit. It just got a lot worse.

He shot daggers straight at Ron's angry face. I could have sworn the anger was visibly pouring out between the two of them, in hot lava pots.

"How in the FUCK would you make that assumption?!" Taehyung shouted. "I would never, fucking ever lay a hand on her!"

"With the way you talk, who knows what you're capable of Taehyung! You fucking coke head!" Ron spat.

Before Taehyung could react, his mom reached forward, slapping Ron across the face.

Everyone sort of got closer to the pile in an instant, and people were pulling people away, Taehyung's dad to his mom, Luna's mom pushing Ron back, Taehyung throwing Luna behind him and shielding her from the action, Yoongi pulling me away, and Jungkook grabbing Yoona right before she launched her fist at her father's head.

Taehyung's mom was screaming fire at Ron at this point, "Don't you ever call him that Ron! I swear you better get a hold of yourself before I knock you out myself..."

The daggers continued as Luna started crying against Taehyung's back. The poor girl was the middle of all this drama, and if I were her, I'd break down too. Shit was scary.

Taehyung twisted around, pulling her to him. "Come on Luna," he whispered, covering her ears from Ron's assaults on Taehyung, calling him every negative name known to man, "we're getting out of here."

He made an attempt to push him and her through the crowd, only to be yanked back by his hoodie aggressively, and thrown onto the floor.

Luna screamed, and arms went flying. All I saw was Taehyung on his back on the hard ground, Ron on top of him, Taehyung's dad above Ron, the moms shouting for them to stop, Jungkook trying to get the guys off of Taehyung, and Yoongi trying to protect everyone else. Jimin came running down the steps, the poor guy still drugged up from all his medicine and exhaustion, trying to figure out what was going on. I got slapped from a swinging arm, knocking me to the ground. Yoona quickly ran to help me up, and I covered my cheek, stunned.

I could hear swings making contact with body parts, but couldn't see anything, as everyone was gathered in a circle, like little kids on the playground surrounding the bully that pulled the girl's hair.

"RON STOP IT! You're hurting him!" Luna shouted, running toward them. Of course, that was a mistake, because she got hit too, by an arm I couldn't make out, across her chest. She slid across the floor on her side, slamming against the end table.

Taehyung saw it, and threw his first punch of the night, hitting Ron square in the nose.

Ron backed up just enough for his dad to rip him off of his son, and Taehyung rolled on his stomach, scrambling over to Luna. He quickly checked her face to make sure she didn't have any other injuries, apologizing to her, and scooped her up in his arms, standing to his feet staggardly.

Taehyung's dad eventually took charge again, trying to get everyone to calm down. Eventually, he succeeded.

Ron was down on the ground, Jungkook behind him with his arms around his body, holding him while Jimin stood in front of Ron.

Yoongi and Jimin were helping the moms, while Taehyung's dad was trying to just not erupt on everyone.

Taehyung's face was bright red, almost looking as if he had been choked, and his eyes were watery. His left cheek was red and brownish already, and his throat was white from hand marks. He sat Luna down, but kept her in his arms, shielding her from anything that may start up again. Luna was crying in his shoulder, and Taehyung sort of glanced around, looking for threats.

Then he started up the steps with her.

"LUNA!" Ron shouted, causing his step-daughter to stop and turn around. "If you choose him, Luna... If you go with Taehyung, then you are out of our lives for GOOD! I won't put up with this shit again, and I won't let your mother either!"

Luna stopped crying, as she made an attempt to grab the banister and take another step.

"DO YOU HEAR ME?!" Ron shouted, causing her to wince and stop again.

She slowly turned back toward all of us, taking a deep breath, "...I hear you."

"Then think about what you're doing! Think about the people who've been there for you! Taehyung, he wasn't there! He walked out, he quit, remember? He broke up with you, said he didn't want you, treated you like shit! Your mother and I, Yoongi, Jimin, Yoona... we were the ones that were there for you! We're the ones who took care of you when you hit rock bottom. The ones who paid for your medical bills after that fucking bathtub incident of yours! The ones wh-"

"I said," Luna gritted through her teeth weakly, exasperated, "...I hear you."

"Luna, sweetheart, please," her mom begged. "Listen to us. We know what's best for you, and Taehyung? ...He's not going to stay with you. He's going to break your heart again."

"Taehyung," his dad began, but stopped as soon as Taehyung lifted his hand to motion for him to not speak.

His mom mumbled something beneath her breath like, "Luna is going to break his heart again."

Luna turned slowly, her eyes swollen red, and watched as Taehyung lifted his hand out to her.

She looked at it, breath staggering, like it was something she'd never seen before.

Then she slowly turned back to all of us, her parents in particular, and frowned.

Taehyung didn't lower his hand, still waiting on her response.

Sniffling, she took another glance at his hand. Then she shook her head slowly, and trotted up the stairs past him, never accepting it.

Taehyung looked pretty upset by that, but held himself together, slowly turning and walking up the steps after her.

And the rest of us down here?

We remained silent, and frozen in our spots.

What the hell just happened?

-

Luna POV

The bedroom seemed emptier. Not as comforting.

Not my new "home" anymore. This place was now foreign.

I remained sitting on the edge of the bed, shaking unsteadily, and placed my head in my hands.

My entire body was trembling, my face was heated, and I couldn't control the sobs escaping through my throat.

My frame was clenched tight, and I was unable to catch my breath.

Opening my swollen eyes, I stared down to the wooden floors, watching tear drops fall and burst as they hit, splattering clear circles along the edges of my jeans.

It hurt so bad... every single thing...

My body, my brain, my stomach, my heart...

The truth, the lies, the fantasies, the ideas...

Everyone, every thing...

It all just... hurt.

My ribs felt like they were going to cut my heart and lungs open. I was wound too tightly in distress.

The mattress moved a little, and my body grew achier, as the opposite side of the bed gained more weight. I could hear movement around me, and some more unsteady breathing... and this time, it must be from Taehyung.

Wiping my right side of my face, I turned to my right, to find Taehyung, with his head in his hands as well.

His elbows were resting on his knees, and his legs were shaking a mile a minute, bouncing his head up and down between his palms. His eyes were sealed shut, and tears were falling from his face as well.

It made me hurt worse.

Gasping for air, I shut my eyes again, allowing more tears to fall.

...I don't know how long we sat there.

...I can't remember how everything suddenly turned this bad.

One minute we were flying, as happily as we have ever been... and now, we're sitting still, and numb to the world.

My chest caved further, and another sob escaped my throat.

I felt so exhausted from the day, and all of the events that played through.

So many things, so many decisions, so many shocking moments... all crashed into us in the last twenty-four hours.

It just goes to show you, no matter how you roll with the punches... if someone's aiming at your head, they're eventually going to hit you.

And we got hit hard.

Taking a deep breath, I pulled my neck up, staring around the fuzzy, dim room.

Then I turned to face Taehyung, watching him sit up, through my swollen, red eyes.

He looked at me, and frowned.

It took a few hard swallows before I could even form a word.

And all that could come out, from my thick and raspy throat was a bare weakened whisper of, "...Taehyung... What are we going to do?"

He took a deep swallow, shrugging his shoulders.

He started to open his mouth, but shut it. This happened a few times... slowly open, shut. Shake his head. Slowly open, shut. Sigh, and look to the ground.

Trembling, I tried to catch my breath. It didn't work too well.

I clutched my diaphragm, where his dad accidently hit me in attempts to get my step-father off of Taehyung. It stung a little still, and was tender to my touch. I didn't want to tell Taehyung who hit me when he asked me downstairs. He didn't need to lash out on his father over something that was an accident.

All of this... it was really bad.

Our families... our friends...  His parents were never going to accept me for Taehyung, and Ron and my mother would never accept Taehyung for me.

In fact, they threatened me... and I believed them.

Would the smartest thing for us right now be for us to break up?

I sighed, covering my face again.

I knew it was.

It would be better for everyone else if we did.

...Besides, didn't he tell his parents earlier that he didn't want to be in a relationship with me?

The idea of losing Taehyung really came full force when I got back to the cabin, and was in the bedroom that we officially made love in.

I knew it would be awful when it actually happened... me losing him. For good this time.

But it had to happen, right?

After all, that's why I was crying in the bathroom when Ron caught me.

And that's what caused this last blow out.

It was all my fault.

Making Taehyung get re-involved with me, causing him to fight Sean over me, to lash out on people... to fight with Ron...

The list went on and on... all the reasons why we shouldn't be together.

But thinking about it, plus hearing Taehyung upset and crying beside me...

My heart crushed into pieces all over again.

-

Jimin POV

After everyone calmed down and straightened up the living room to make it look at least halfway like it did before the eruption, I asked Yoona to come upstairs with me and help pack.

She was back to sharing a bedroom with me, ever since her and Jungkook broke up. I loved having her back there with me.

We were pretty quiet while we tossed things in suitcases, and I could tell that, just like me, she was straining to hear Taehyung and Luna from their bedroom.

We were listening to hear them argue.

Or fighting.

Or crying.

Or throwing stuff.

Or breaking up.

Or anything.

But what we heard? Silence.

Absolute, fucking, torturous silence.

It was putting everyone on edge. No one was making sound downstairs either, besides Taehyung's dad and Ron who were arguing until their wives told them to take it outside.

We were quiet, shuffling around the room to gather our things.

Yoona zipped up her suitcase, and slumped down to a sitting position on the bed, folding herself over her arms. "Wow," she whispered tiredly. "What a night."

"I know," I frowned.

I watched as she tucked a few inches of her golden hair behind her right ear, and sighed.

"I just can't believe my dad attacked Taehyung like that," she started. "He's not like that. Ever."

I walked over to her slowly, and sat down beside her, "I guess he has a sore spot for him."

She nodded, "He does. He's always been audible on his dislike for Taehyung, ever since Luna's major breakdown. You know that though. ...But to actually throw punches and grab him by his neck like that... it's very out of character for him. He's a loving father, he really is. I just... I can't believe he snapped like that."

"What amazed me is, Taehyung never hit him back, until Luna got thrown to the ground."

"I know," she replied, "he just laid there and took it."

"You know Luna had something to do with that decision," I scoffed, "Taehyung doesn't sit back and let people swing on him."

"I know. You should have seen him at Wal-Mart when he and I went. He was pretty angry, I thought he was going to do some serious damage, because these guys were trying to steal money from him and calling me a bitch and all this stuff."

"Taehyung's not one to fuck with," I agreed. And I knew from experience.

She pushed her full suitcase on the floor, not caring that it toppled over on its front. "I'm exhausted. I cannot imagine what my sister is going through right now. ...I want to go in there so bad and make sure she is okay, but I know they need their privacy."

"They do," I replied, pushing my suitcase on top of hers.

She faced me, looking pretty fucking haggard.

Pursing my lips, I pulled her beside me, and scooted us back to the headboard.

She rested her head on my shoulder, curling her knees up.

I threw my arm behind her neck, and grabbed her free hand.

Silently, we both watched as she flipped our hands around, to where her palm was on the back of my hand.

Then she lifted her shirt, and pressed my hand on her stomach.

My heart stopped, and my lips parted.

Stupid me. I didn't even know the results yet!

I felt my pulse begin to quicken, and turned shakily to look at her.

She didn't look up at me, just began to massage the back of my hand.

Swallowing hard, I licked my lips and cleared my throat. "Is it..." I started, in a half-whisper.

"Empty," she exhaled weakly.

That caused my heart to really falter now. "So... we're not..."

"...No...," she whispered sadly.

I frowned.

It suddenly hit me, the loneliness we both felt at that moment.

And I'm not sure why exactly, because we weren't together, and were both so young...

But the idea of it... of a miracle that could be between us... shared just by her and me... that would have been amazing.

Amazing, but... currently non-existent.

And it made me sad.

She slid down a bit, pressing the side of her face into my ribs. She continued to hold my hand on her stomach.

I could feel my heart aching, and knew hers must be too.

"I'm sorry, Yoona," I whispered, "that you had to... I don't know... stress over th-"

"It's okay," she sniffled, nodding her head reassuringly. Then she shrugged, "I would have made a good mama though. I love children."

"I know you do," I frowned.

"...And our child would have had the most beautiful eyes, thanks to me," she chuckled, "and the most beautiful set of white teeth... thanks to you..."

I chuckled, running my fingers through her long hair. "Yeah," I whispered, "...and long legs, like the both of us..."

She nodded, "...and perfect boobs if she were a girl."

"That's all you," I laughed, as she squeezed me tight.

"...and the most loving, caring heart," she whispered. "...That'd be all you ...Jimin."

I closed my eyes, fighting back tears.

This was really fucking sad, and I couldn't figure out why.

I felt like we seriously lost a child or something.

And we never even made one in the first place.

She took a deep breath, kissing my shirt, "...Maybe someday though... right?"

I smiled, holding her tight as I kissed the top of her head.

"Yeah," I whispered. "...Maybe someday love..."

She gave me a nod, then closed her eyes as she rested against me.

I began to hum to her a song that I had in my head all day... "Love Song Requiem" by Trading Yesterday.

It really fit the mood I was in.

It really explained to her what I wanted... a maybe someday love... with her.

-

Luna POV

The silence was overwhelming.

It seemed to bounce off the walls, breaking down my body every second.

I knew I had to do something.

I knew he was going to break up with me.

I expected it, ever since I heard it come out of his mouth at the hospital.

...And though it may be for the best, according to everyone else... What if I couldn't take it?

What if it wasn't the best for me?

But what could I do?

Then it hit me, really hard in the face.

I needed to show him how I feel.

Inhaling, I slid off the edge of the bed, and crawled on the floor toward the damaged closet. I opened it the best I could, and lifted open my wooden chest on the bottom.

It hurt to pull this out in front of him, but it needed to be done.

Swallowing hard, I sat beside him, and slid it under his elbows, where he was still cradling his head on his knees.

I watched him open his eyes, and look down at it.

He started to ask me, but I went ahead and answered, "It's my journal."

He slowly straightened up, tugging on the ends of his disarrayed hair.

"There's three different markers," I weakly explained. "There's a black ribbon, a white ribbon, and a red ribbon. ...The, uh, black ribbon, was when you broke up with me, four years ago. The white ribbon... that was when you and I met at the club, the night you came back into my life... and the red ribbon in the middle..."

He looked up, eyes swollen and matching mine, as my voice trailed off.

I frowned at him, "...That was Sean," I sobbed, as the tears came out. "...It was the night he... raped me, and... I included it in your journal, because... Because it was the only way I could talk about it... I could talk about it through you, even though you weren't here then."

A tear fell down his face.

It hurt so bad to watch it. Made it hard to swallow. I struggled to breathe as I continued, "... When you read it, it'll probably be jumbled and out of context. I wrote, then stopped, then wrote, then stopped... I remember it was hard to keep focus."

"Luna..." he whispered.

I shook my head, "Please... let me finish."

He nodded slowly, wiping his face.

"That's why the journal is more like a binder now... It's been all my thoughts of you... ever since the day I met you. I want you to read the red ribbon page. I never actually read it after I wrote it, and I... m-marked it red so I'd know when I was breezing through the pages, to skip over that part, so it wouldn't break me down."

He started to speak, but I raised my hand, objecting it.

"Read it out loud."

He continued to look at me, with his sad, devastating eyes... studying my expression. I held still and stiff, waiting for him to do it.

Eventually, he sighed, wiping more tears as he cleared his throat and opened the page. I glanced over it... at the broken handwriting... scribbled in messy, barely visible font... and dried tear drops making some of the words blurred out...

But I didn't cry yet.

I needed him to read it.

"December 6th, 2018," he exhaled staggardly.

He looked at up me, and I gave him a nod.

He cleared his throat, reading the lines slowly, while he cried.

"I don't know where to begin.
I can't think. It's hard to process anything. I'm sitting here, looking around, and I know what these objects are... but nothing makes sense when I stare at them. I can recognize the toilet and know what it is... but it's faceless... nameless... pointless. The sink... the shower... the disgusting water stains and mildew on the cracks of the tub... the broken and chipped tiles on the floor...
It all reminds me of me.
I am disgusting.
I am broken.
I can't walk. I can barely stand. My body hurts. My chest is aching so intensely, it makes it hard to sit here without toppling over. My lungs, they are crushed, forcing air to come out in gasps...
I can't breathe very well and I don't have the ability to stop shaking... I need to be quiet. What if he comes here to my house?
I'm hiding inside of the bathroom right now, so no one can find me. I don't know what to do. What do I do? What happened? Was this my fault?
...Is it possible that I am dead? Somehow writing this, but not existing? Because that would make more sense. Perhaps something has weighed down so heavily on my body, that I escaped it, and am staring down at myself. No... It's not possible.
Because I still smell him on me. Oh my God, I can still fucking SMELL HIM.
I don't feel good. I feel like I'm going to pass out.
I've thrown up all the contents in my stomach. I broke the mirror in here, so I don't have to look at myself. I scrubbed my body with hot water, as hot as it would go... but I still feel him all around me. It felt disgusting to even WASH myself. I didn't want to touch my own skin. I felt sick every time I did. This body, it's not mine anymore.
I still hear his fucking voice in my ear, telling me to hold still, moaning and huffing in that scratchy voice. He's all around, he's everywhere, and I cannot escape him! He's inside every hair follicle of my body, he's inside my throat and ears, he's buried deep within my core... No matter what I do to try to get rid of him...
...SEAN WON'T GO AWAY.
I see him every time I open my eyes. I hear him every time I gasp for air. I feel him every time a tear falls from my lids. I smell him every time I rub my face.
I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know. Please God, tell me what to do... Tell me what to do because I can't figure this out.
What did I do? What did I do, why did I go to his house? Did I deserve this?
God, I really don't feel good.
My head is pounding from where he pushed it into the headboard. I see scars starting to form on me.
...Oh God, I hurt. This fucking hurts, this fucking hurts, this fucking hurts. It all just HURTS so much.
Please Lord help me. Take this away from me. Let me die.
My stomach hurts so bad. I feel my body, my chest, it's all closing.
...I wish Taehyung was here.
I really do. He'd hold me in his arms and take this away from me, I KNOW he would. I wish he could be here to tell me that I'm OKAY, and that he has me now. That it's OKAY to cry. Because right now, I don't know what to do. But he'd tell me it's okay, I know he would. I wish he was here so bad... I'd give anything to have him, to see his hands holding me, for him to kiss away this FUCKING PAIN. I wish that he'd just take this all away from me, BECAUSE I'M REALLY SCARED RIGHT NOW... I miss him so much. I need him.
I wish I could tell him that I'm sorry, for everything. I feel like if I never was with Jimin then we would have never broken up, and then I wouldn't have met Sean.
None of this would have happened.
...My legs hurt, from where Sean pushed them apart... GOD WHAT DID I DO?"

I heard him closing the journal, but wasn't looking at him.

Instead, I kept my face covered. I heard him shuffling around.

"I'm so sorry baby," he weakly replied.

It became silent.

I didn't know what to say.

There was only one thing that needed to be said, and it hurt to speak it out loud.

"I know that you're going to leave me."

It was silent again.

Then I felt him move a little, "What?"

I sighed. "I know. ...I heard you talking to your parents in the hospital, and I ...know. I just wanted to tell you, before you do, that I barely survived losing you that first time. And though I know that if it's what you want, then I should let it happen in order for you to be happy, but... I don't know if I can make it through losing you again."

"Luna..." he whispered.

"But I'll try it," I exhaled. "I'll try to make it through it, because that's what you want."

"Luna I never said that."

"It's okay Taehyung. I heard you; you don't have to lie t-"

"Luna, stop," he replied, exasperated.

I listened as he climbed off the bed, and felt him kneel down on his knees in front of me.

Slowly, I dropped my hands and looked up at him through swollen eyes, feeling my heart clench close.

He looked as sad as I did.

"Luna, I never said that I was going to leave you."

I frowned, staring into his green eyes dismally. "I heard you."

"When did you hear me say that?"

"At the hospital. ...Please don't deny it, d-"

"Baby, I never said that I was going to leave you. Ever."

I furrowed my brows at him, "But I heard you."

"The only thing I can think of that maybe coursed you the wrong idea was when I told my mom that I didn't want you to be my girlfriend."

I nodded, mournfully. "Yeah. That."

"Baby," he chuckled, sliding between my legs on his knees, while he gripped my hands, "look at me."

He pulled my face up to look at him, wiping my tears with his thumbs. "I'm not leaving."

"But... I heard you," I sighed, "I heard you say that you didn't want me, that you weren't ready for that type of commitment. I heard you say that our relationship was a waste."

His eyes bounced from one of my eyes to another, and then he buried his face in my legs.

I remained tense, afraid that if I touched even his hair, I'd break down and it'd be that much harder.

After a moment, he took a deep breath, and lifted his head to look me directly in the eye.

"Listen to me. You misunderstood everything. I don't want you to be my girlfriend, and I don't want to be your boyfriend. And sometimes, yeah, I do feel that the relationship was a waste, because we didn't stay together. We lost each other. I'm not looking for that type of commitment again. It's hopeless and pointless when it comes to us."

"T-Taehyung, you're not making any sense," I shook my head. "Please just... leave me if you're going to, because it hurts waiting for it."

His hands reached up, holding my cheeks between his warm palms.

I tilted my head, frowning at him as another tear fell into my lap.

He caved in, sighing. He pulled me closer to him, wrapping his arms around my waist, and placing his forehead on my stomach, "I'm sorry Luna. I'm so sorry."

I heaved and gasped for air, lifting my hands in the air.

I still couldn't touch him.

"Please," I whimpered, closing my eyes, "...just do it."

I could hear him sobbing against me, "...I can't."

"Please," I cried again.

"I can't baby."

The tears were heavy, falling onto the back of his hoodie.

He shook his head, holding me tighter, "I cannot leave you, Luna. I love you."

"I love you too," I replied, gasping for more air. "But I'll be oka-"

"Marry me."

My chest heaved again, "...what?"

He sniffled, pulling his face back to look at me, but keeping himself between my legs, his arms wrapped tightly around me, "Marry me."

I opened my mouth to respond, but all I got out was a squeak.

I tried to speak but I couldn't.

I knew confusion was written all over my face.

Was he making a joke, or doing this just because he thought I'd kill myself or something if he left me?

Did he think I blamed him for Sean, because I didn't.

That wasn't my point to having him read that journal.

"I don't want to be your boyfriend, Luna. I don't want a pointless, high school relationship," he continued. "It never got us anywhere good."

I pulled my face back, "But-"

"I want to be your husband, Luna," he said, gripping my face hard and forcing me to maintain eye contact with me. "I want to protect you, always. I don't ever want you to hurt like you did that night. I don't ever want you to worry about anything. I want to take care of you and give you everything that I can possibly give... I want you to stay with me, always."

I shook my head, trying to remember how to breathe.

He sat up on his knees, his hand digging in the right pocket of his jeans. I watched as he pulled out a blue box, and that's when it really hit me.

He was doing it because he wanted to.

Instantly, my mouth closed and I forgot how to think.

Taehyung cleared his throat, sitting down on the backs his knees between my legs, his left arm still around me, his right hand clutching the box.

"I've been thinking of a way to ask you ever since the day that you and I had our official 'friends' date... That day you and I went out and did all those things. Do you remember when we went shopping at the mall? Well... I saw that ring in a window when you were in the restroom, and knew I needed to go back and look at it. So I did, the night after, when you were sleeping. I researched the ring online, found out where it was made, called the manager of the store in the middle of the night, paid a lot of money to have him go in just to sell it to me... I planned to ask you when we got back to Seattle... Maybe a surprise trip, perhaps... Have candles leading out to that meadow of ours, and be waiting there wearing a tux... Get down on one knee and propose to you..."

He smirked, shaking his head, "Funny how life always goes unplanned when it comes to us."

I was still trying to figure out how to breathe, and watched as he snapped open the blue velvet box.

Then I really couldn't breathe.

Inside, was the most beautiful ring I had ever seen in my entire life. It was platinum silver, with tiny sparkling square diamonds trailing around the entire band. In the center, was a slightly larger, sea-blue stone, the most beautiful shade of turquoise known to man. It was breathtaking.

He sighed, pulling it out of the box as he licked his lips. He pulled back a bit, and lifted my trembling left hand in his.

I shivered as I watched him hold the ring in front of my finger. On the bottom of the ring was an inscription, "A moment of clarity".

Steadying myself, I looked up, and melted into his eyes.

Was this really happening?

He smiled, blinking slowly, "You're my entire world. ...Do you know that?"

I shook my head.

"You should. You've always been, Luna."

"Yeah?" I giggled through tears.

He gave me that crooked smile as he thought to himself, "...I can still recall, to the day, the moment when I knew that I loved you... It was after our first actual date, when I walked you to your front door, and we almost had that first kiss. ...There we were, both wanting something but hesitating, hanging together in a moment. We were happily lingering. And I remember thinking, how incredible was it that two people could come together and share a single moment like that? ...Luna, I knew right then and there that you were special. I felt alive, in anticipation, and it was all because of you."

I gasped, taking a long swallow.

He massaged my knee, before wrapping his arm back around my waist, "...At sixteen years old, I knew that you were going to be my soul mate... You gave me that moment of clarity. It was because of you...that I found hope."

I smiled, wiping tears away, before clutching his arms. I still didn't know how to speak.

Taehyung beamed, "...That feeling hasn't diminished, love. I wanted to ask you then, I wanted to ask you before we broke up... and I want to ask you now..."

I watched as he steadied himself, lifting one knee to kneel down on a single.

He took a deep breath, and then calmness washed over me as he looked up at me in a soothing manner, "Luna, will you spend forever with me?"

Hearing those words... wow. I covered my mouth with my right hand and closed my eyes. I could feel the tears roll from my cheeks, up and over each one of my fingers, before hanging on the bottom of my hand. Some fell off, while others trailed down my wrist. It took a few moments before I could open my eyes and look at him... and doing that stole whatever breath I managed to muster right out of me.

Because he was there. Patiently waiting, not even trembling... not one ounce of hesitation. He was sure about this.

Taehyung was waiting for me.

Taking a breath for luck, I tilted my head and smiled at him, rubbing his face with my hand, "On two conditions."

He grinned, biting his bottom lip, "Okay."

"One," I replied shakily, "you never stop loving me. Ever."

He chuckled, "That's a given."

"And... two," I replied, grabbing his left hand and placing it on my stomach, "...you realize that when you're angry and wanting to fight someone, or anything else... You understand that you're not making decisions for just Taehyung anymore. You're making decisions for three people... who would die if they ever lost you."

The warm and slow smile on his face melted my heartstrings, as that velvety voice replied, "I promise, my love."

"Okay," I whispered, gripping his arms tighter.

He slid closer to me, almost pulling me off the bed, as he lifted himself higher on his knees, his chest against mine. "Is that a yes?"

Frowning at him, I shook my head, "...no."

He furrowed his brows, looking confused.

Then I grinned, throwing my arms around his neck, "That's a HELL YES."

He laughed and exhaled at the same time, sliding the ring on my finger.

He sat back on his knees, grabbed me by waist with his hands, and using just his arm strength alone, lifted me up off of the bed, and down, onto his lap.

I hugged him tight, burying my hands in his hair.

He kissed along my shoulder, up my neck and my cheeks, then grabbed my head and pulled it back. He brushed away the tears I hadn't even realized were still falling with his thumbs, and then murmured, "My Luna" against my mouth, before kissing me.

I smiled against his lips, pulling him all the way into me, while I inhaled his scent. Our kiss was slow and romantic, increasing with time.

Taehyung craned me to him with his right hand, while he felt around for the floor behind me with his left. Carefully, he laid me back on the hard wooden floor, and kissed me with even more passion.

When his warm tongue slid between my lips and began to massage mine, it felt like thousands of tiny little wires were going off simultaneously. It was the first time I felt every single piece of him against me... all the love that we had for each other, came pouring out in gentle yet cascading waves, until we were fully enveloped in it.

I sighed, tugging on his hair as he kissed along my neck. Taehyung continued to lower himself slowly, hovering over me, until he got to my chest.

I watched as he inhaled my smell, before sliding his hands down my sides. My body shivered while he ran his hands along my ribs, pushing my shirt up with them. He allowed it to hang over my abdomen, and gave me a crooked smile that melted my body into a puddle of mush.

Then he ran his nose down my diaphragm, around the circle of my belly button, and lower, resting right before my low-rise jeans.

He smiled against my skin, taking a deep breath. His thumbs massaged my hips as he lifted my lower body in the air, pressing his warm lips against my skin.

I bit my lip as a tear rolled down the side of my face, watching him linger there, kissing me.

He gave it a few gentle pecks, before he pulled his face up an inch, and looked at my skin.

"Hello baby," he whispered softly, before kissing there again. Each time his lips pressed into my stomach, it was tenderly.

And that was when I realized... he was kissing the both of us at the same time. We were the two most important people in his life now, and the way he was showing it mended all the pain in my heart...

Every single hole, crack, indent, crevice, and scar... With each kiss he peppered or lingered on as he held me beneath him... He healed them all.

It scared me, all the things that were about to come our way... the people about to enter our lives.

But being with Taehyung, in that moment, with his reassurance, made me not worry about all of that right now.

I ran my fingers through his hair, pushing away a few strands that were hanging against his forehead, as he pressed his warm cheek against my cool stomach.

He slowly lowered me to the ground and tilted his head up, smiling at me.

"I love you," we whispered at the exact same time, which caused us to laugh.

*&*#!#$^%$^

Choosing Taehyung over my family may have been the simplest choice to make, but it didn't make it easy when it came to leaving the cabin. We knew that they'd all be downstairs, waiting for us to come and tell them our decision. I'm sure the parents were probably counting on the fact that their intimidation was going to cause us to separate for good.

They really should know us better by now.

Taehyung quickly packed up all of our things, refusing me to do just about anything. He said he wanted me to relax.

Oh, wait. He let me pack my shampoo and toothpaste.

It was adorable, watching all of his stuff get thrown in together with mine... Like his shaving cream and razors in the same bag as tampons and hairspray. Or our toothbrushes.

The little things like that, made me giddy, because I saw them in a different light now... Our light.

He placed my last full suitcase besides his, and exhaled, "It's all done."

I smiled at him, throwing his hoodie on over my t-shirt. He took it off in the midst of packing, but it was still warm, and smelled of all his deliciousness. I could have licked it.

He grinned at me, standing on the other side of the bed, "You look hot in it."

"Does that mean I can keep it?" I teased, swaying from side to side.

"What's mine is yours now."

I blushed for no apparent reason other than that statement, and covered my stomach with both of my hands, "Well then... I can't wait to see you in one of my thongs."

He chuckled, "Oh yeah, that'll be the day."

I giggled.

Taehyung took a deep breath, and crawled onto the bed, over to me. Then he pulled me to him, burying his face against my chest. "I smell both you and me on this shirt," he replied, "it's kind of arousing."

Biting my lip, I began to stroke his hair, "Too bad we couldn't have sex in here one last time."

"Yeah," he replied. "Maybe we can pull over on our way home? Some cheesy motel that you rent by the hour. With you being this gorgeous, I bet it'll only take me a few minutes to gather a nut."

I laughed, "I don't think so!"

He pulled his face back, and looked up at me, "I'm kidding."

*&*#!#$^%$^

With the help of our friends, we managed to make it downstairs without our parents seeing or hearing us.

Alice distracted the moms, while Jungkook got Taehyung's dad to play a game of pool with him, and after some long and tiresome convincing that 'we were probably upstairs fighting' - cough/chuckle - Yoongi got Ron to play a concentrating match of Chess. Poor tired Jimin found a way into the garage and pulled Taehyung's car out, while my sister helped sneak us downstairs and out the back, to the car.

(I offered to go out the window of the bedroom, but Taehyung objected quickly. He said that I'm now a 'fragile package', and there was no way he was dangling me from the iced-down, freezing cold balcony, no matter how many times Jungkook promised to catch me.)

It was after nine pm now, and freezing balls outside. I shivered as Taehyung and Jimin loaded the car up.

Yoona pulled me into her arms, sharing her body heat and Jimin's leather jacket with me.

Taehyung and Jimin quickly shook hands, and then we all hugged quickly, trying to stay warm.

"Love you sissy," Yoona whispered, "see you tomorrow."

"'K, love you too. Make sure to tell them you went to check on us up there, and we were just gone."

She giggled, "I will. They're gonna shit bricks, you know this, right?"

"I know," I laughed, "I hope your dad shits a giant one for all the hell he's put us through."

"Touché," she replied.

Jimin stood behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist, "Taehyung, take care of Luna tonight."

"I will," Taehyung said, opening the passenger door for me.

I kissed Jimin on his cheek and hopped inside the car, cranking the heat up.

We waved quickly, before Taehyung quietly backed the car out of the drive.

Once we were on the main road, he peeled out, causing the rear end to slide a little on the sleet-snow-slush mixture on the ground.

It felt like we were runaway's, on an adventure.

I loved every single second of it.

-

A/N
And that's that.
I hope you enjoyed reading, leave me your thoughts they're always appreciated. xoxo