𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟒𝟗

John knew that the way he was driving was completely unsafe but he didn't care. Yes this had all happened before but this time it was different. His clothes were covered in her blood and it made him feel sick.

If he didn't hurry up, she could die with nobody at her side. And he refused to let that happen.

He just hoped that Esme had called Arthur and Tommy.

"Fucking let me through!" He demanded, pushing through the busy hallway. The first thing he spotted what Micheal being wheeled down the corridor with Polly and Tommy at his side.

"Tom! Tommy!" John called out, running to him. Tommy had to do a double take before realising it was John. "Where's Maeve?" He asked.

Tommy's face dropped. "What do you mean? What's happened to Maeve?" He asked. John dragged his hand across his face. "Esme didn't tell you? Tommy she's worse than Micheal— she was in front of me when it all happened."

He grabbed John's arms and pulled him to the side. "Right take a breath, John." He said, "i'll go and find Maeve. You call Arthur and make sure he knows." Tommy instructed.

"You'll make sure she's alright?" John asked quickly.

Tommy took a deep breath of annoyance and looked him dead in the eye. "When have I ever let her down?" He whispered, the tone in his voice was cold. John clenched his jaw and stumbled backward, wanting to come away from his older brother.

Tommy on the other hand, wasted no time before he was in the other hallway where it seemed to be incredibly loud. He followed the crowd of doctors into a room.

"Mr Shelby, you cannot be in here." A doctor said. Tommy raised his eyebrows. "The last time i checked, it's me who controls this city. So you let me in there," he pointed, "by order of the Peaky Blinders."

If Polly had been there to hear him use the same exact threat as Arthur did last time this had happened— in a hospital, she'd have gone mad. She always saw the threat as a vile way of getting what they wanted. Just like children.

The doctor lowered his head shamefully and stepped aside. Tommy entered the room and stood watching as they fumbled with tools. Anger grew within him as he noticed Maeve was in nothing but her blood soaked under clothes. He felt it was a violation toward her own privacy.

But he knew they were just doing their jobs.

Whilst once doctor began carefully examining the wound on her shoulder, another looked at the more harsh one in her side.

The nurse looked up at Tommy and back down again. "I remember her," the woman said, "she's the Shelby girl. It's the same shoulder she got shot in last time. If that bullet had travelled even just one millimetre to the side, she'd be dead— I don't know how she isn't dead yet." She whispered.

A man waved her away and shook his head in disappointment. "Mr Shelby we are going to have to ask you to leave." Another said politely.

He took in a deep breath and refused to notice the lump that sat in his throat and the strange stinging sensation that was attacking his eyes. This time, Tommy didn't argue. He allowed the doctor to usher him out the room.

But he didn't go anywhere. He remained at the doors and looked through the windows.

It was only when he heard distant shouting, he turned. Arthur was being held by a completely distraught John as he was told about the situation. Arthur's voice was hoarse.

"Artha!" Tommy shouted, walking to them and forcing his eldest brother to his feet. "Artha get up." Tommy scolded. Arthur looked at him sadly and held onto Tommy's arms. "Where is she?"

"They're giving her as much help as they can. But it's the same as last time, Arthur— she'll be so incredibly lucky if she survives." He said. Arthur shook his head and fell into Tommy's arms. "This wouldn't have fucking happened if you didn't send her down there! This is all your fault." Arthur cried.

Tommy didn't fight back, didn't refuse the blame. Because for once he agreed, it was his fault. John paced the room and leaned against the wall, stress consuming him.

-

Tommy stood over Maeve's bed whilst Arthur was forced home by Linda for Billy's sake. He stood with his hands in his pockets and took a deep breath.

"You've done it again, eh?" He muttered, finally sitting down. "You've escaped death. You were right all along, why be scared of something that will never catch you? By the sounds of it, you purposely stepped in front of John, knowing the risks of you getting hurt. But you weren't afraid. Because it never catches you."

She lay still on her back, her chest rising slowly. This time, she was far too lucky to have survived. The odds were definitely in her favour. But how many times would this happen before she didn't get to say she'd escaped it.

John had remained out in the hall, clutching onto a phone whilst Arthur rambled. "So she's alright— is she stable?"

"Doctors think she'll be here for a bit. Say she's lucky to be alive."

"Yeah well they said that last time didn't they?" He huffed, "if she wakes up— tell her that her dad is coming as soon as he can, yeah? Tell her i love her."

John shook his head. "Yeah, alright Arthur." He said before slamming the phone down.

"Was that Arthur?" Tommy asked when he finally left the room. John hummed in agreement. "I got in touch with Isiah too— thought he deserved to know she was here." John said sheepishly.

There was something about Tommy. He wasn't arguing but yet still had a cold look in his eyes. "Did he say much? Arthur, did he say much?"

John shook his head. "Told me to tell her a few things if she wakes up." He shrugged. "Tommy." He began, "you've got to stop putting her in positions like this. This has happened far too many times. She's only just turned eighteen, Tom."

"She likes to do it."

"She likes being shot in places that can kill her instantly if they were slightly to the left?" John raised his eyebrows, talking with sarcasm.

"No, she likes the jobs. She likes the sense of freedom and that people trust her. She likes to knowing we believe in her." Tommy said.

John inched forward. "If you believed in her, you wouldn't have sent her to fucking hang with the rest of us would you? You'd have kept her in Birmingham at your side like the mad dog you've made her."

Mad dog. The term they all seemed to be using.

"How's Micheal?" Tommy moved on. "Critical." John said bluntly. "Listen, it's all got to stop. Find a way to end this feud with the Italians. Surely they aren't this angry over some comment a seventeen year old made all those months ago."

"John she killed Vincent and harmed Angel."

"Yeah but she's a fucking kid!" John shouted, earning hard glares off the other people in the hospital. "A kid who seems to kill with no mercy, John. You all say she's a kid but how is it that she gets a better job done than all of you lot, eh? Answer me that! She ain't a fucking kid no more!" Tommy hissed.

"Because you let her." John gritted through her teeth. "It's you that made her think it was all okay."

"We're the Peaky fucking Blinders, John. Kid or not, she is one of us. She's doing what we all do. It just seems that she's better at doing it. So if that upsets you, i'd suggest going off with Esme and raising them fucking chickens." Tommy snapped, waving toward the door.

John fumed and spun on his heels. "I'm going to talk to Arthur. Maybe he will actually listen to me."

-

Finn was the first to enter the hospital, Isiah right behind him. He looked around, his suit jacket in hand.

"Tom?" He asked, his chest heaving up and down. "What happened— is she dead?" Finn panted, still trying to get over the fact she had been released days ago and he didn't have a clue.

Tommy grabbed Finn's shoulder and ignored Isiah who hovered by the door of Maeve's door, trying to look through the window.

"She's awake but we think Arthur has scared her a little bit. He er— went off his head. Called her stupid for listening to me." Tommy began telling him how it went when Arthur finally showed up. Finn pulled a face of disgust. "Is he being serious?"

"It was all heat of the moment, Finn boy. But Maeve should be okay. Clearly God is on her side. Again. But you'll be allowed to see her in," he paused and checked his time piece, "round about now, actually. You can go in but don't bombard her or lecture her. It's been a while since she's been on her medication."

"What— the medication you took away from her?" Finn scoffed. Tommy pursed his lips into a straight line and let out a breath. He stepped back and let Finn go into the room. Isiah agreed to wait outside and give the boy a few moments.

Finn took a deep breath and pushed the door open. It didn't take long for her to notice him, jumping slightly.

"Sorry, i didn't mean to scare you." He apologised quickly. Maeve couldn't help but smile. "Oh Finn," she tilted her head, "come here." She begged, holding her arms out despite the pain that shot through her.

Finn carefully embraced her and closed his eyes for a moment. "I've missed you." He admitted. "You didn't think you could get rid of me that easily, did you?" She smirked.

Maeve let him sit down and gave him a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry nobody told you i was back. I should've called but it completely crossed my mind."

He shook his head. "I know now so it's okay." Finn shrugged. His eyes widened in realisation, "that reminds me— i actually have something for you. It was for your birthday even though that was a while ago." He rambled.

Maeve almost cried on the spot at the fact he'd bought her a birthday present despite her being in prison at the time.

Finn pulled out a box extremely similar to the one Tommy had gifted to her. At first she was confused when she saw a pair of hair clips sat inside. Finn shifted awkwardly in his seat.

"Do you remember a few years ago when you lost those hair clips and accused me of stealing them. I lied and said it wasn't me and you were upset for days. I thought it was stupid because they were just hair clips and i forgot about them. But then you were..sent away and i found them again. I suppose i got all sentimental—" he grew red in the face through embarrassment.

Maeve quickly shook her head and picked up the pearl hair clips. "Don't worry Finn. I think it's lovely that you're being sentimental."

"But there is something else in there i promise! I'm not that awful." He laughed slightly.

Maeve wanted to laugh at him but didn't just because she could tell that he was nervous already. Maeve gently removed the small layer of tissue paper, revealing the most gorgeous silver chain with a small, red ruby hanging from it.

A gasp escaped her lips. "Finn, it's beautiful."

"Ada had taken me to the markets before she went off to America. I saw it and thought of you. And because i expected to never see you again, i thought 'if i at least buy something that reminds me of her, when she's gone it'll feel like i still have her with me.'" He trailed off once more.

Maeve swallowed hard and looked away, blinking harshly to stop any tears from escaping her eyes. "Thank you, Finny. I really like it."

The corner of Finn's lips turned upward and he played with his hands, feeling proud of himself. "Isiah is outside— i can send him in if you'd like."

Maeve hummed and nodded. "Thank you, Finny. I love you."

Finn stood and shoved his hands into his pockets. He leaned down and kissed her forehead, not wanting to risk hurting her with a hug. "Love you too, Maeve."

Finn eventually left the room and gave Isiah the okay to go in after him. The boy entered, feeling far too anxious. "I thought we lost you, Maeve." He told her.

Maeve lowered her head and sighed. "Well you didn't." She said simply. Isiah didn't know whether to hug her or lecture her despite Tommy telling him not to. "Are you crying?" Maeve raised her eyebrows in shock and started at him whilst he remained at the door.

Isiah shook his head quickly and looked away, sniffing. "No— no i'm not crying." He refused. Maeve's lips parted. "Isiah, i'm fine. I promise. It's just the same as last time and i'll be out soon enough." She said sympathetically.

Isiah nodded and shoved his hands into his pockets.

"I find it funny," she said. Isiah frowned. "No matter how many times this kind of thing happens to someone, nobody ever knows what to say. This has happened to me more times than Finn can probably count— and yet neither you, Finn, my dad. Or even John and Tommy can figure out the words for a situation like this."

Isiah didn't completely understand her sudden ramble but for her sake, nodded along.

"I thought at least one person would try and make a joke out of it— tell me that i've only gone and done it again. But nobody has made that joke, not even Tommy. Which makes me wonder, how many more times does this need to happen before they stop caring. Before they finally find the words or the jokes?"

Isiah didn't necessarily like what she was saying. He didn't want it to happen, not again. It hurt them all enough seeing her there. 

"You've seen me here before. I'm sick of hearing the same things." Maeve said, trying not to make it sound as though it was his fault that nobody could find the words to speak to her. "Where's John?"

"He's out in the hall. Only got back a few minutes ago— do you want me to get him?"

Maeve nodded. "Please." Before he could walk out, she stopped him, "I love you, Isiah." Isiah turned quickly and his eyes widened slightly before he smiled, "I love you too, Maeve."

It was only moments before John was beside her bed, still looking distraught from the events of that day. "You're alive, Maeve. You're bloody alive." He kneeled beside the bed and took her hand in his.

"Y'know i've never really believed in God— but maybe God was on our side today." John whispered. Maeve let out a breathy laugh. "Yeah, maybe."

"Why d'ya do it? Why did you stand in front of me?" He asked. Maeve took a deep breath. "I'm still trying to figure out if i did it intentionally or by accident. Either way, i knew i couldn't let my uncle die. You have kids, John. Quite a few of them. You have a wife. You have a family."

"You have a family too."

"But i know my family could go on without me. But what i also know is that i couldn't go on without you." She whispered. John furrowed his brows and bit his tongue. "Why do you think that?"

She shrugged.

"Maeve i know for a fact that none of us could live without ya. Especially not me. I said it earlier and i'll say it again. You've always been like my first daughter— nothing will ever change that. But today, Maeve, today you saved me. But at what cost? Your own life."

She shrugged again. "The day will never come where i won't risk my own life for my family, John."

John felt a lump in his throat and he looked down, leaning his forehead on her knuckles. "You could've died." He muttered. Maeve scoffed and rolled her eyes, "i'm aware."

John could hear her smile whilst she spoke. Even after almost dying for the— god knows how many times, she was still able to smile and laugh. Nobody but Maeve was cable of doing such a thing.

"How's Micheal?"

John shrugged. "He's okay— oh, your dad told me to tell you that he loves you," John remembered. Maeve nodded, "only took something like this for him to remember i was still his daughter, eh?"

"He's a bit of a prick sometimes, ain't he? I blame Linda." John couldn't help but smile when she did. "Hes a total prick. Do you think he would let Finn move in with us for a while?" She changed the subject.

"Ask him— hold on, why?"

"Because Finn is my uncle and i love him very much. He was left alone for months. You all forget about him so i feel bad. Me and Finn have always been close so why not have him stay with us? Not like he's got anywhere else to go."

"I think it's best you speak to ya dad about this." John shrugged.

Maeve raised her eyebrows and hummed. "I fucking will speak to him." She said enthusiastically. "Finn deserves to be in a home where he is loved and people pay attention to him." She said, crossing her arms.

"Right well..i'm going to go make a few calls. I should probably check on Aunt Pol too. You get someone to ring me if there's anything wrong yeah?" John pointed a finger at her. The corners of her mouth turned upward. "Of course."

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