
ELEVEN• HURT YOURSELF
★
Lita stood frozen, ice cream in hand, her expression void of emotion as she noticed him. There he sat in the corner of the ice cream store, a radiant smile on his face as he gazed at the girl before him.
A surge of longing and jealousy swept through Lita, a feeling she desperately tried to suppress. It wasn't her he was looking at with such warmth; it was his beautiful girlfriend. As much as Lita wished to dismiss the twinge of hurt and jealousy, it lingered beneath the surface.
"You gotta be kidding me—" Jacob's voice cut through, and he followed Lita's gaze. Wrapping an arm around her, he gently turned her away from the couple, guiding her to their own table.
"Just ignore him," Lita muttered to herself, but the ache in her chest made it easier said than done.
"Are you alright?" Quil asked, his usually light tone replaced with a more serious note.
"Never been better," Lita replied, the words leaving her lips with a forced cheerfulness that didn't quite match the turmoil within.
Lita's eyes widened in sync with Paul's as she watched Jade rise from her table and make her way over to theirs.
"Oh, shoot..." Seth muttered, following Lita's gaze.
"Language!" Jacob chided, throwing a napkin at Seth, eliciting laughter from the group.
"That's not even a bad word!" Seth said with laughter
Lita held her breath as Jade approached, sending the group a bright smile. The others mumbled their greetings, but Lita remained silent, her gaze fixed on the table.
"Hey, guys!" Jade greeted, her enthusiasm undeterred. The group mumbled their responses, and Lita stayed quiet, her eyes now fixed on the table.
"Okay..." Jade said, a hint of confusion in her expression. "Hey, Lita, I know you're new to town, and I thought it'd be nice for you to have a friend,--a new friend." She corrected herself quickly, glancing at the guys.
Lita, unsure of how to react, looked at Paul, who was shaking his head at her. She raised an eyebrow, wondering how he knew what his girlfriend had said. Shaking off the thought and ignoring his look, Lita replied, "Of course... I'd love that."
"Great! I just know we'll be good friends," Jade said, excited. The two girls exchanged phone details as the group erupted in laughter.
Back in Jacob's car, the atmosphere was light, and Seth now sat between Embry and Lita. Jacob exclaimed, "You evil witch!"
"Evil?" Lita laughed in surprise.
"You totally did that just to annoy Paul," Embry pointed out.
"Partly... but it'd also be nice to have a new friend."
"So, we're not good enough, huh?" Quil teased.
"No! Of course you are, I love you guys, but sometimes it's nice to hang out with other people," Lita responded with a playful tone.
"Whatever you say," Jacob conceded as they drove off, dropping Lita back home amid the lingering echoes of laughter.
Lita swung the door open, its creak echoing the frustration that simmered within her. "Woah, calm down," Bella quipped with a laugh, already seated at the dinner table.
"Where's your dad?" Lita inquired, scanning the empty house.
"He's staying late at the station. Your mom is in the bathroom," Bella nonchalantly replied.
Lita slumped into a chair, declining Bella's offer of leftover spaghetti. Her mind swirled with the events of the day.
"Guess who I saw today," Lita ventured.
Bella theatrically closed her eyes, feigning deep thought. "Uhm...I don't know, Jesus?"
Lita chuckled, shaking her head. "I wish...I saw Paul and his girlfriend."
Bella's eyes widened in surprise. "Shit...how'd that go? Did you follow through on the whole being friends thing?"
"Well..."
"Oh my God, did you kiss him again or something!?" Bella's volume rose, causing Lita's eyes to widen.
"Shush! No, no. Nothing like that, Jesus!"
"Oh, well that's good," Bella sighed, relief evident in her tone.
"I just took his girlfriend's number so we could hang out," Lita admitted with a casual shrug.
Bella's reaction was a loaded silence, her gaze piercing Lita's facade. "What?" she asked incredulously.
"Uh...yeah," Lita replied, her confidence waning under Bella's scrutiny.
"Lita...that's like really bad."
Lita's eyes widened. "It is?"
"Yes!" Bella's response was a mix of disbelief and exasperation. "Please don't tell me you thought that was a good idea."
"I was more thinking about how funny it was that he was angry," Lita said, her innocent smile contrasting with the weight of the situation.
Bella sighed, shaking her head. "You're not actually gonna hang out with her, right?"
"Why not?"
"Because she's dating the boy you clearly still have feelings for!?"
Lita felt a pang of guilt. "I don't still like him. That was in the past. I really think this is a good way to move on."
Bella's laughter, though loud, had a tinge of concern. "Lita... you're only gonna end up hurting yourself," she advised before retreating upstairs to her room. Lita sat in the lingering quiet, grappling with the truth in Bella's words.
"She's right, you know..." A voice cut through Lita's intense stare, where Bella had once been. The chair was replaced by the image of her mother.
"Were you seriously listening in on our conversation?" Lita asked, her frustration palpable.
"Only some of it," her mother spoke innocently, causing Lita to scoff and begin to get up and walk off.
"Wait!" her mother called out as Lita's foot reached the first step.
"What?" Lita said impatiently.
"I...I bought a dress for the wedding for you."
Lita sighed, her gaze falling back to the top of the stairs. "Please just try it on, for me?" her mother asked, sounding slightly sad.
Lita, not feeling bothered enough to argue, robotically followed her mother into her and Charlie's bedroom. She had never been in it, but it was rather plain, with a pile of books sitting on a nightstand and a large mirror on the side of the wall.
Her mother passed her a soft blue dress. "Here," she said softly with a smile.
Lita held the dress up to herself in the mirror, sighing before looking to her mother, who looked at her expectantly. "What?" her mother asked.
"Aren't you gonna leave so I can put it on?"
"Mija, I'm your mother, don't be–" Lita cut her off with a sharp look, which made her mother roll her eyes and reluctantly leave the room.
As Lita put her phone on the bed and began to undress, putting on the light blue dress, her phone began to vibrate violently. Picking it up and answering, a happy voice rang through. "Lita! Honey, you're not going to believe this! Mateo, he got it! We found him a donor!"
A smile washed across her face, a warm feeling inside. "You're not joking, right?"
"Of course not!"
"Shit! I mean, oh my god... Dad, this is amazing!" Lita spoke, her eyes beginning to water with happiness. "Can I speak to him?" she asked, and after some rustling, Lita heard a familiar voice that caused the tears to flow.
"Lita?" Mateo asked.
Sniffling back the tears, she spoke. "Mateo! I heard the news, buddy. I'm so happy for you."
"Hey, are you crying?" Mateo asked.
"No!" Lita said with a laugh.
"Hey, Dad! Lita's crying!" she heard Mateo yell out before a happy laugh rang through the phone. "It's okay if you are; Dad cried when he found out too."
Lita laughed at his words. "I bet you can't wait to start soccer again."
"Yep, those losers are gonna have to watch out once I'm back out on the field," Mateo said proudly.
Lita's conversation was cut when a hurried knock on the door was happening. "Hey, listen, I've gotta get going. Mom's got me trying on some stupid dress," she said, whispering the last part still sniffling slightly.
"Okay... you'll be back as soon as the wedding's over though, right?"
"As soon as possible."
"Okay...I love you," he said, making Lita laugh softly.
"I love you too, Mateo," she said before hanging up. Looking in her reflection to see mascara tears running, wiping the tears away, Lita brushed her hands on the dress, leaving a thick black stain.
"Shit!" she silently cursed before her mother burst in.
"Lita, what's taking– oh...honey, you look beautiful," her mother said, turning her away from the mirror and pulling her in for a hug.
"Thanks..." Lita said before swiftly pulling out of the hug, no matter how badly she wished for it to last longer.
"But what's this?" her mother said, pointing towards the stain.
"Oh– sorry, I–"
"Don't worry about it, honey," her mother said, to Lita's surprise. "Besides, now you have a reason to get a job!" her mom happily exclaimed.
"What do you mean?" Lita said with furrowed eyebrows.
"To pay me back? For the dress and the dry cleaning."
Lita's smile faltered. "Oh."
Her mother furrowed her brows. "Nothing in this life is free, Lita. If you think I'm going to spoil you, you're wrong," her mother said with a dry laugh before turning Lita back to the mirror.
"You're almost as beautiful as me," she said before booping the girl on the nose. "I'm going to make dinner!"
Lita tried to stuff down her anger at her mother's words, feeling let down yet again at what could have been a bonding moment.
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