K E I R A

Moscow, Russia

The clicking of the metal ring as it slid across the floor still echoed inside my head, never fading away like an echo was supposed to. I hated how I'd let him get to me, but unlike him, I couldn't just flip a switch, and act like he didn't mean anything to me. He did, he was everything to me, and that was why I gave him up, but he didn't see it like that, to him what I had was a betrayal, and he wasn't wrong, but this man—the man he'd become—got off on pain and suffering, yet the knowledge that he still didn't hate me like he'd insinuated had my heart swelling with hope, even when I knew it only breeds eternal misery. Perhaps a little bit of misery could revive me, and wake me up from this nightmare.

I knew I had to play by his desire for me to get through to him, but he hardly ever left me an opening. I no longer recognized him. I sighed as I felt my legs wobble, eyes stinging with unshed tears. I'd cry for the years we missed tonight, but before I'd resign myself to the heavy burden of the pain branding my soul, I crouched, looking for the ring he'd thrown away so carelessly just to deepen the wounds in my soul. I thought he'd make it easy for the both of us by just shooting me, but now I knew, he wanted to do to me what I did to him before he killed me—he wanted to break me. Well, tough luck because I wasn't going down without a fight, and one way or another he'd meet me halfway, the sins of our past, forgiven, but never forgotten for they made us who we were.

The metal looked abandoned against the cold hardwood floor, and it been for eight years, a slow poison killing the both of us with the memories of the time we had. Leaning down, I curled my fingers around it, and placed it in my palm, curling my fingers around it to feel how cold it was. How it was no longer a symbol of love, but abandonment, lies, and secrets. Feeling moisture trickle down my cheeks, I didn't bother wiping it away, and blinked, allowing more tears to fall, and seal the fate of our impossible love. Reaching for the necklace around my neck, I unclasped it, and removed it from around my neck, my own wedding ring taunted me as I slid his inside, and clasped it back, both the rings clinging and clashing against each other, the void inside my chest widening. I started rubbing my arms, suddenly too cold, and settled on the same armchair Niko was on before I came in. His aftershave's scent still lingered, and I took a deep breath, inhaling him, allowing his woody, all manly scent to embrace me, knowing that he wouldn't.

For eight years my eyes had stayed dry as if they knew I had no right to shed a single tear, not when it was all my fault. Not when I was the one who set fire to my livelihood. It was a fire I'd started, but it blew out of proportion, and I no longer had any control over it, maybe I never did, and only fooled myself into thinking that I did. A dull pain started building around my skull, reminding me of the killer headache waiting for me, my eyes stung with all the tears that I couldn't stop, one after the other, I felt droplets trail down my face, clinging to my jaw, and finally dropping like a tired drop of rain on my collarbone. In the moonlit room, I felt memories and regret choking me, it had been a while since I dug my grave, and now the pull of it just became too enticing for me to ignore. I rubbed the heel of my palm against my closed eyes, willing myself to stop, hoping that the physical pain would banish these thoughts from my head.

If only it worked that way.

Drowning my misery away with alcohol had never appealed to me, maybe because I'd wanted to feel the sting, I rubbed salt on my wounds, hoping they'd never heal, that the pain would remind me of all that I'd lost, and when the temptation to return to him was too much, it reminded me why I'd chosen this infinite darkness over a lifetime of borrowed time with the man I loved. The only man I've ever loved. I'd experienced why love was volatile, why falling in love was like flying, the flight was addicting, but gravity was an enemy, and when it pulled back, the falling was no longer a rhapsody, it was that haunting second before a bullet tore your flesh away, leaving you wounded, bloodied, and just helpless.

Tonight I'd feel miserable for myself, but just like the midnight mayhem dissolved into the melodies of dawn, I'd rise and fight back ten times harder. Niko wanted me to be just as depraved as him so he wouldn't feel the guilt inside him, he wanted to forget, but I didn't want to go down like the embrace of wind, too soon, too fast.

It was a thin line between love and hate, and if he could slip to the other end one time, he could do it again, maybe it'd be harder to love this time, but falling wasn't the hard part. Not when temptation and desperation were pulling its strings.

*

I didn't waste time playing Niko's game when the morning rolled around, I'd freshened up, despite the killer headache from last night, hired someone to take my car to Niko's club like all the days before so he wouldn't notice something was amiss while I ran my errands, and cleared my head. I also had to send a message to Kyzer, he was getting impatient and I had to appease him, for his sake if not mine. It didn't take me long to steal a car from the parking lot of the building, and I severed it out on the street. My contact would meet me here today, and I needed to have more than one word with her.

We'd decided to meet for breakfast just to keep the suspicions of the streets at bay, these streets weren't mine, I was just as much of prey here as anyone else. A Shark might've been The Queen of Ocean but on land, she was just as much dead as the smallest fish of the ocean. Entering the small, cozy place, I looked around, nodding when I found her seated at the far end, her head covered with a black oversized hoodie that hid most of her frame too.

"Eleanor," I offered her a smile she returned and sat across from her. She seemed tense, and I didn't know if it was the weight of the news she had for me or something else. Dealing with people that weren't under The Pentagon's jurisdiction was another risk, but one I was happy to take because I knew she wouldn't kill me. She'd tried, failed, and that's when I'd found out who was after me eight years ago, and now she was as close to a friend as I could get. Astley had found me with Niko so I had to fake my death, and leave, ensuring Niko stayed safe from all the monsters that'd fled from their shackles under my bed. I'd also taken my time to look into her, and took her under my wing, no one deserved the life she'd had.

Her eyes didn't hold the spark of a person in their mid-twenties, they didn't all those years ago, just like now. There wasn't even that unhinged look I'd seen in so many others like hers, hers were grey, empty, an abyss and fortress of secrets she didn't want getting out.

"Keira," She nodded back, taking off her hood, her chocolate locks falling over her waist in smooth caresses as she brushed with her fingers, trying to look as normal as others around us. Her glasses sat on her nose as she tightened her fingers around the coffee mud, tilting her face to the side. "Why don't you order something, Keira, then we'll talk."

"Why don't you order for me, I'm a little unfamiliar with the language," She smirked, shaking her head, and called out the waiter, ordering for me in Russian.

After the food was placed on our table, and she dismissed the table, she placed her elbows on the table, her mug safe between them, and leaned forward. "Somebody's watching you, and it's not just lover boy." She said, then leaned back in her seat, bringing the mug to her lips, as she sipped from it casually as I tried to connect the dots inside my dead, nearly scoffing at her reference to Niko as 'lover boy', he wasn't that man anymore. "I asked around, people are afraid of him, and it all roads lead back to Chicago." Astley. She didn't have to say his name for me to know it was him. "And as per our initial agreement since you've been back, there's an assassin after lover boy. I know the kid, he was eight when I came with you to make a name for myself." To the rest of the world Eleanor was Pandora, and true to the name she did hold everyone's secrets, their ticks, and everything to bring the mobsters of the world she dealt with down, but all she did was hold it above their heads when it was needed, never exposing all of us to the light.

"What about him?" I arched my brow, knowing that my face wasn't betraying me. I'd mastered this charade long enough to slip up now.

"He's ambitious, determined, and he's observing his prey right now, hard to tell when he strikes as you know it's hard with Nikolai, he's a vigilant man." He paused, and I held my breath, not this again. All I did was bring mayhem around him, "And from the rules of Hellhounds, it'd be three more days at best; you put the little fucker down like the rabid dog he is."

"Fuck." I said, exasperated, this wasn't something I was expecting.

"Indeed," She smirked, her eyes glinting with the thrill of the chase, but she won't be the one killing the fucker who came after my man. I would.

I narrowed my eyes, not wanting her to see through my façade, friend or not, "Why didn't you tell me he was Moscow's king?"

"Sweetheart our deal included minimal details, and what he did for a living wasn't part of it." She taunted, her brow hiking up as she looked around once again, habits I supposed.

Eleanor had a point, I couldn't fault her for something I'd asked of her.

"And I'm going incognito for a while, don't go crazy if I don't contact you." I stiffened at that, if Pandora had to hide, that meant someone knew all that she was hiding and wanted them out of her. "I need to track a Russian bastard wreaking havoc in America, and he's onto me, Orlov's a cunt, but a smart one, and I can't make mistakes." She finished.

"Alright, but you'd tell me if you need help?" I asked, knowing Eleanor would much rather do it all on her own.

"I'm killing that cunt," She nodded solemnly, not like she'd just revealed her plans to take a man out. Her features focused and sharp once again as she folded her hair into a bun and covered them with a hood again. "I'll email you the assassin's details, and hideout."

"Thank you," Eleanor nodded and left, the door closing behind her softly as I leaned back in my seat, breathing heavily, panic settling in my bones, the urge to scream overtaking everything else, but I kept it in control, and got up, pocketed my phone, walking out of the small place back to where I'd parked my car.

The hair at the back of my neck stood with awareness, someone was indeed watching, and I knew it wasn't the same butterflies I felt when Niko was around, besides he only showed up at midnight, not a second before, or a second after.

I checked the backseat before I opened the doors and sat inside, locking the vehicle as soon as I closed the door, and then ignited the engine, reversing it out of its spot in the parking. My phone pinged with a message, and I picked it up with one hand, the other one clutching the steering tightly, it was dangerous, I knew, but my life was always on the edge of the knife. Taking a glance at the screen I noticed it was Eleanor's email about details, I pulled over, skimmed through them, corrupted the file, and deleted it, finally knowing what I had to do. To save Niko's life like I always did even if he didn't know it. Tonight when the little shit came back to his hideout I'd be ready for him, and so will my penthouse to hear the screams of another person, and I'd lose myself to the monster that always lived inside me, never under my bed.

♤ ♡ ◇ ♧

So... the plot thickens.

What do you think? Will she get to the assassin first or...?

If you do wonder, yes it's the same Eleanor from Masquerade, Alessio's girl. That's all I'm revealing about his story for now, but it'll be one hell of a ride.

Thank you so much for reading! Please vote, comment and share!