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Bad Enough

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In the corner of the room, Nerissa trembled, hugging herself tightly despite being covered in blood, which would likely never come out of the clothes she was wearing. With her eyes closed and salty tears staining her cheek, Nerissa tried to get a hold of emotion but she just kept replaying the horrifying scene in her head over and over again. The snake stiking Sir Ewan. Somehow managing to rid herself of the snake. Bood - so much blood. Sir Ewan asking her to sing with his final breaths. Those scenes kept flashing before her eyes and they wouldn't stop. Nerissa began to rock back and forth singing Scarborough Fair to an audience of none.

With a basketful of herbs, Gaius walked into the physician's quarters. The basket immediately fell to the floor and scattered the herbs when Gaius beheld the situation in his quarters. He first spotted his niece and ran, as quickly as he could, to where she sat curled in the corner. She didn't seem to take notice of him. Just kept singing to herself and rocking herself back and forth.

"Nerissa!"

Gaius reached out to take her hands when he noticed they were covered in blood. His eyes widened in horror.

"Are you alright, child?"

Nerissa timidly nodded her head before she raised a shaky finger and pointed toward Sir Ewan. Gaius's eyes widened in horror and rushed to the knight's aid, leaving a traumatized Nerissa in the corner. She once more began to sing to herself.

There was blood everywhere. Gaius quickly noted the wound on Sir Ewan's neck, where he had been bitten the first time. There were no longer just two small puncture wounds. No, it was far worse than that. Despite knowing he wasn't likely to find one, Gaius leaned close to listen for a breath, but none came. Gaius covered Sir Ewan's face with the blanket on top of him before he moved back to his niece.

"What happened?"

But Nerissa simply closed her eyes and shook her head. With the scene replaying over and over in her head, saying it aloud would make it seem even more real. Perhaps if she didn't say anything, then it wouldn't be true. Then maybe Sir Ewan would somehow still be alive.

Gaius placed his hands on Nerissa's shoulders and gave her a gentle shake. "Nerissa, you need to tell me what happened."

She just rocked and sang brokenly to herself, her voice cracking from the weight of the emotions as well as sniffling back the tears. Gaius pursed his lips for a moment. He knew he wasn't likely to get anywhere with Nerissa in that state. So he stood up and rushed to the door. He stopped at the top of the stairs and called for the guard down below. After several attempts, the man finally looked inside at Gaius with a puzzled expression on his face.

"Send word to Prince Arthur that I require Merlin's presence immediately. It is of utmost importance."

The guard nodded his head in understanding before running off to carry Gaius's message. Gaius exhaled a deep breath before he returned to a frantic Nerissa. He had never seen his niece like this, but then again, he hadn't known her very long. If anyone knew what to do, it would be Merlin.

Still, Gaius tried once more to persuade Nerissa to talk, but she continued rocking herself and singing. Unsure of what more he could do, he placed a cup of water beside Nerissa and began to tend to the deceased, preparing the knight for his final send-off.

Soon, Merlin came running into the physician's quarters out of breath. "You couldn't have picked a worse time, you know that?" Merlin wheezed, resting his hands on his hips, attempting to catch his breath. "Arthur's holding an audience with the King and he. . ."

Gaius made eye contact with Merlin whose brow furrowed as he noticed that Sir Ewan was covered completely with the blanket. Merlin opened his mouth to speak when Gaius motioned toward the corner with his head. He spotted his sister - completely broken and sobbing in the corner. Without a single word, Merlin ran across the room to his sister, nearly tripping over several stools and running into a table knocking over several vials of something or another.

"Nerissa . . ."

Merlin no more than had his sister's name out when she threw her arms around Merlin's neck and tightly clung to him. He wrapped his arms around his sister and held her close and she began to sob even harder on his shoulder.

"It. Was. Terrible!" Nerissa somehow managed between sobs as her tears began to saturate her brother's shirt.

But if it bothered Merlin, he said nothing. He simply held onto his sister and let her cry. Although Merlin feared she would never stop crying and knowing his sister as she did, when she got in this sort of state - which was rare - she'd either cry so hard she'd vomit or cry herself to sleep. Merlin would much rather not be too close for the former.

Remembering what their mother would do back in Ealdor, he began to sing to her. He wasn't blessed with the gift of song like his sister - but it seemed to calm her. Merlin was certain he sounded like a drowning dog singing to her, but if it helped, he would keep singing. His voice cracked when he tried to sing a high note, which made a noise that was the mix between a laugh and a sob escape from Nerissa. Merlin shared a half-smile with his sister as she tried to manage to control her crying.

"Perhaps she could use some rest," Gaius said softly as he drew nearer to the siblings with a small vial in his hand. "I've prepared a sleeping draught that should prove soothing on her nerves as well if she wants it of course."

Merlin looked at his sister, who had managed to stop sobbing, but her breathing wasn't quite normal yet. She wiped her nose with the back of her sleeve before she hiccoughed. Merlin arched an eyebrow as if silently waiting for a response from her. Nerissa looked back at Gaius, but in doing so caught sight of the spot where Sir Ewan lay beneath the blanket. She shuddered for a moment before nodding her head.

After getting Nerissa to her feet, Merlin helped her upstairs to her room. Nerissa sat down on her bed and Gaius handed her the sleeping draught. After drinking the vial's contents, Gaius and Merlin left the room so she could wash up and change. Thankfully Gaius has the foresight to bring a bucket up for her to use to wash up. She scrubbed off as much blood as she could and changed into her nightdress before crawling into bed despite the early hour, her mind quite drowsy from the draught she had taken and fell asleep.

Nerissa's eyes were red and puffy from crying in her sleep when she finally awoke. Her eyes still glistened from unshed tears when she opened them. She wiped her eyes and nose with the sleeve of the nightdress and sniffled. What a truly awful sight it had been to see Ewan like that. He was supposed to make it. They had given him the correct medicine to counteract the venom. But that hadn't been enough to save him from the fate that befell him.

"Nerissa, how are you, my dear?" Gaius asked, clearing his throat. His voice sounded somewhat strained like he had just woken up as well.

She waited for the tears to flood down her cheeks again, but Nerissa seemed to be all cried out for the moment. Nerissa wiped her nose once more with her sleeve and slowly sat up. "Where's Merlin?" she asked.

Gaius cleared his throat once more. "I do believe he is having some words with Prince Arthur."

Nerissa looked at Gaius, waiting for him to continue. He looked almost hesitant, but she nodded her head for him to continue.

"The audience with the king didn't go as we hoped."

Nerissa's brow furrowed. "Because of Sir Ewan?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I'm afraid so."

He paused for a moment, waiting to see Nerissa's reaction. She didn't say anything, nor did she break down into tears. She just brought her knees up to her chest, wrapped her arms around them, and rested her chin on her knees. She sighed deeply and closed her eyes.

"I hate to ask, but I feel I must..." his voice trailed off.

Nerissa cleared her throat. She was quite sure what she was going to tell him, but just as she had opened her mouth a door downstairs was slammed shut, startling both Gaius and Nerissa.

"Unbelievable!" Merlin shouted at the top of his lungs. There was a clang of pots and pans from downstairs. This was followed by a few choice words that Nerissa hardly ever heard come from Merlin's mouth.

Gaius and Nerissa exchanged glances.

"I'll be back, my dear," Gaius told her as he stood up and headed for the door.

"No, I'm coming with you," Nerissa said as she wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and padded barefoot behind Gaius. She hoped that Merlin's issue would help to distract her from her own, at the very least.

When she got downstairs, Merlin was pacing back at forth in front of the fire. His hands raked through his own hair before they became fists and he punched at the air. He didn't seem to notice Gaius nor Nerissa at the bottom of the stairs. He just continued to pace and rant under his breath. "What an absolute prat. A complete dollophead. A selfish and egotistical..."

"Talking about Arthur are we?" Nerissa asked, wrapping the blanket a bit tighter about her. "What's he done now?"

"He's sacked me, that's what!" Merlin shouted slamming his fists against the table. He then looked in his sister's direction. It took him several moments to process that she was standing in front of him. When realization struck him and quickly closed the gap between them and enveloped his sister in a protective hug. "How are you?"

Nerissa tried to wriggle free from her brother's grasp. "You're suffocating me, that's what," he hissed at him before managing to free herself.

"Are-are you alright?" he asked.

The siblings made eye contact and Nerissa gave her brother a small, curt nod. "I don't want to talk about me just yet. I want to hear all about you getting sacked." Nerissa attempted to force a small smile on her face, but Merlin could tell it wasn't genuine. "I didn't know you cared so much about the job."

"It's not that he did it. It's why he did it," Merlin said folding his arms across his chest and hanging his head a bit.

Nerissa sighed. "Which I suppose does bring this back round to me, doesn't it?"

Gaius and Merlin exchanged glances before they both nodded their heads causing Nerissa to sigh again. She glanced over to the bed where Ewan had lain, only he was no longer there. It was just a bed stripped of its bedding. Her bottom lip began to quiver as the scene began to replay in her head, but Merlin's arms quickly wrapped around his sister once more. He turned Nerissa to shield her from seeing the bed and led her to the nearest bench.

Neither Gaius nor Merlin seemed to press her, but she knew that she was going to need to speak. Besides, maybe sharing what happened might make her process things. Nerissa drew a ragged breath and tightly grabbed the edge of the table, so hard that her knuckles were nearly white.

"There was another snake," Nerissa muttered, her gaze focused on the grain of the wood of the table. "He awoke and said..." She couldn't help but blush when remembering that he told her she had the loveliest voice he had ever heard. "I-I went to get him some water when. . ."

She sniffled, but Nerissa could feel Merlin's hand tighten on her shoulder. She looked away from the table for a moment and to her brother. No matter how often they teased or tormented one another, they were always there for the other. This ordeal was no different. She took a deep breath before finishing.

"That's when the snake started biting him. It was vicious. Horrible." Nerissa then looked at her brother her bottom lip quivering. "And as you know, I'm . . ."

"Scared of snakes," Merlin said for her, before squeezing her shoulder once more.

Gaius's brow furrowed as he began to scan his eyes across the physician's quarters. "Then where is the snake?"

"I-I'm not really quite sure all that happened. It all sort of happened at once, but I somehow managed to strike the snake."

Merlin's eyes widened in shock. "With your hands? The broom? Fire poker?"

"No, with a ladle."

Both Merlin and Gaius snorted, trying to hide their surprised laughter. "No really, what'd you use?" Merlin asked, trying to hold back a chuckle.

"Really, I used the water ladle. I swung and next thing I know it flew out the window."

Gaius and Merlin exchanged glances before they backed away from the table. Gaius pushed a table beneath the window and Merlin climbed on top. Nerissa groaned and wrapped the blanket tighter. "You're not going to find it. It's probably safely hidden in Valiant's shield by now."

"But maybe there might be some evidence," Merlin said as he pulled himself up toward the window to get a better look.

"Wouldn't it just be easier to go down there?" Nerissa asked, arching an eyebrow at both Gaius and her brother.

Merlin and Gaius looked at each other rather sheepishly before they headed for the door, practically tripping over each other as they rushed for the stairs. Nerissa took a deep breath and felt some moisture escape from her eyes. She couldn't quite process what she was feeling. She didn't know what she was feeling. All she knew was that she needed some air.

Glancing out the window, she noticed that the sun was beginning to set. As quickly as she could hobble, Nerissa went back to her room and carelessly threw a gown over her nightdress and rewrapped herself in her blanket before she attempted her own escape from the physician's quarters.

Knowing that Merlin and Gaius would have gone right at the bottom of the stairs, Nerissa opted to go left. She didn't want anything to do with their hunt for evidence of the snake. She'd had enough of snakes for the day - whether the serpent creature form or foul human beings.

While her journey was slow and the light was beginning to fade, Nerissa found herself in a near-empty square near the stables. She thought perhaps she would maybe stumble across Lukas, whose babbling might help prove to be a welcome distraction. But instead, she found herself face to face with the second to last person she wanted to see at that moment. Prince Prat.

Perhaps if she wouldn't have been so deep in thought she might have heard his grunting or sword slashing, but instead, she froze in place as he turned toward her. His bright blue eyes locked with hers. Nerissa could feel something bubbling within her. She gave a slight curtsy and nod of her head, eyes still locked with his. Prince Prat simply nodded his head in return. Her head told her to run, well hobble, away as fast as she could before she said something she'd regret. But her mouth opened before her feet could move.

"You sacked him? I demand to know why!" Nerissa shouted at the prince. But given everything that had occurred that day, she was hardly in control of her senses.

"Excuse me?" Prince Prat hissed, lowering his sword and narrowing his eyes at Nerissa.

Nerissa, still feeling rather emboldened by the battling emotions within her, repeated herself. "You sacked my brother and I demand to know why. He was only trying to help you."

Prince Prat stood a little taller. Nerissa spotted his lips purse for a moment like he was also trying to hold something in and choose his words very carefully. Not that he, a prince, should care to do so for a commoner. He took a few steps closer toward Nerissa and stood before her, practically towering over her short stature. "He made me look like a fool," Prince Prat hissed.

Feeling a little self-conscious, Nerissa tugged the blanket a little tighter. Then without backing down, she said, "You do that well enough on your own, sire." She added another small curtsy as the word sire seethed from her mouth.

His eyes flew open in shock. No one spoke to him like that. At least no one that had lived to tell the tale. It was clear he was fighting a raging battle within himself, once more trying to choose his words very carefully. He took another step closer, clearly trying to intimidate her into submission. "It was your brother's word against a knight's. Pray tell, what would you have me do?"

"Believe him!" Nerissa retorted without missing a beat. "Believe me! While Sir Ewan's attack was the fatal one, he wasn't the only one attacked this night. I nearly lost my own life in his service."

Prince Prat's eyes widened once more, his features seemed to soften. "I wasn't aware that..."

"Of course not," Nerissa scoffed. "Why would you be aware of the condition of a nobody?"

"That's not what I meant. . ."

"That snake almost killed me too!" Nerissa shouted at him before he could finish his thoughts. The emotions within her bubbled over and she was no longer in her control. Her temperament matched the colour of her hair. "But yet you aren't doing anything to lift a finger for anyone but yourself!"

That seemed to strike something within Arthur. The composure he had been trying to retain was beginning to melt. "You've no proof. Where is the snake? If there ever truly was one, it could have come from anywhere."

Nerissa scoffed derisively. "Do you know nothing of Camelot and its nearby lands? I thought you and your merry band of knights went off galavanting across the lands. There are only four types of snakes common to Camelot and the one that attacked Ewan, the one that attacked me wasn't one of them! Would you happen to know where that very snake is rather common? The Western Isles!"

She was breathing rather raggedly as she continued to look straight at Prince Prat without backing down. "And who do we know that is of the Western Isles? Hm?"

Prince Prat pursed his lips for a moment as he took in the information Nerissa had just given him before he shook his head. "And how do you know this?"

"It's called a book," Nerissa stated. "You should try opening one, sire." She dropped another curtsy upon the word sire.

It was obvious Prince Prat was holding back, not that Nerissa understood why. He raked his fingers through his tussled hair. "You can't speak like this to me."

Nerissa didn't back down. She held her head high and stood to her tallest form, which wasn't much compared to Prince Prat. "Go on. Throw me in a cell then. Cart me away. I'm only speaking the truth and you know it."

"What is it that you want from me?" Prince Prat shouted in frustration upon realizing that Nerissa wasn't backing down.

"I might not yet be accustomed to the ways of Camelot, but when most people make a mistake they fix it. Fix this or there will be consequences."

Prince Prat's eyes narrowed. "From you? Are you threatening me?"

"Never, sire," Nerissa dropped another curtsy. "But given the fact that you're out here practising your swordsmanship, which is already quite excellent, there's a part of you that knows what my brother says to be true. But your pride seems to be your downfall, sire."

"So you think I'm an excellent swordsman?" Prince Prat asked with a slight grin.

Nerissa arched an eyebrow. "Is that truly all you got out of that?"

"That was the only important part, was it not?" Prince Prat's demeanour seemed to quickly change from combative to trying to win her over with his dashing smile.

Nerissa rolled her eyes. "Unlike most of my sex, I'm not stupid enough to fall for a beautiful smile and whatever else this is," she said gesturing to Prince Prat with her hand.

"Another compliment? It doesn't seem like your defences are quite as strong as you make them out to be." He grinned his handsome grin, seemingly drawing closer to her.

"Or perhaps I'm only lulling you into a false sense of security so you think that you're winning me over."

Prince Prat and Nerissa locked eyes, neither one of them willing to back down from their stance. Before either of them could say one more word, Gaius came running toward them. Both Prince Prat and Nerissa each took several steps back from each other, both of their cheeks tinged a bit pink.

"Nerissa! We've been looking all over for you!" Gaius gasped, nearly out of breath upon reaching them. "You've given Merlin and me quite a fright." He then offered a slight bow of his head toward Arthur.

"I needed some air," Nerissa said, wrapping the blanket tighter. "So I went for a walk and then. . ." She looked up at Prince Prat and quickly glanced away.

Gaius's eyes widened, knowing the regular contention between Nerissa and the prince. "I apologise for whatever it is she might have said," Gaius told Arthur. "She-she's had a fright this afternoon while caring for Sir Ewan and. . ."

Arthur put his hand up to stop Gaius from rambling any further. "We were just discussing the matter, Gaius." He then glanced at Nerissa. "I'm simply glad the fate of Sir Ewan didn't also befall you."

Nerissa offered him a small nod of her head.

"Now, if you'll both please excuse me. . ." and with that, Prince Prat left leaving Nerissa confused as she watched him walk away.

Why hadn't he ratted her out to Gaius? He had nothing to gain by keeping their heated conversation a secret. She had fully expected him to reveal everything to Gaius, but he hadn't. Why? Perhaps he was going to use it against her at a later time. That was the only thing plausible that came to mind.

Nerissa gently tucked her unruly hair behind her ear. She must have looked like a madwoman given her dishevelled state. And yet Prince Prat hadn't commented on that either. Although, thoughts of looming death tended to distract one's thoughts. For a moment, Nerissa felt guilty. While she didn't particularly care for Prince Prat, if things turned ugly tomorrow, knowing their last interaction. . .

She couldn't think like that. It would only make things worse. And things already seemed bad enough as they were.

Author's Note: So a lot has happened in my life since I last updated - the worst of which being is my younger brother committed suicide. That's been really stressful and hard to deal with and given where I left the last chapter off, I didn't really want to touch this one. I couldn't consume any media with death, drugs, or guns until recently. It was bad. But I'm slowly healing - although not completely done grieving yet. This Thursday, October 14th would have been his birthday - and the firsts are always hard. So that will probably suck. I'm also a teacher with BlackHawk helicopter parents that I can't do anything to please this year, and then I got really really sick almost to the brink of pneumonia so I couldn't work for two weeks. So, needless to say, things have been crazy.

I just really appreciate anyone who has taken the time to read this story and for all the positivity you've shared with me over it. Truly, it means a lot to me and while I wasn't able to write during the hard times, your support kept me smiling at least.