CHAPTER NINETEEN

❝Everyone is a moon and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.❞

Mark Twain

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Somehow, Larry manages to convince Luna's parents and Dr. McPhee that the trip to London is extremely necessary without telling them practically anything. Luna's going, because she works with Larry (actually, it's because she has the magic time powers, reader, but obviously you can't tell anyone that), and Nicky's going, too, because he's sort of grounded and Larry's not letting him stay in New York by himself.

Luna packs frantically, knowing that Larry and Nicky will be there in an hour to pick her up, and sure enough, they're right on time. So Luna hugs her parents goodbye, lets Nicky take her suitcase, and hurries out to the taxi, which drives them to LaGuardia.

The flight to London is quiet: it's late at night, so almost everyone's sleeping. Larry snores in the aisle seat, and Luna rests her head on Nicky's shoulder, only half-watching whichever Fast & Furious movie Nicky's chosen to watch and thinking about Ahkmenrah, below them in the belly of the airplane. Outside her window, the clouds part to reveal the moon, round and full above the ocean below.

When their plane lands, it's barely sunrise in London, and both Luna and Nicky have finally drifted off. But they get up anyway, make it through customs and security with no hitches, and take a taxi to their hotel, which is just a block from the British Museum. Luna and Nicky both want naps, so Larry lets them sleep until just after noon, when they venture down to the lobby, grab sandwiches from the café there, and head out into the chilly January sunlight.

Luna wants to ride on the London Eye, and so does Nicky, so they spend half an hour in a pod all to themselves, watching the Thames flow past and the cars on the opposite side of the river go by. Sunset's at five-thirty, and the museum closes at five, so they've only got a few more hours to sightsee.

Larry buys coffees at a shop just off the Thames, and they lean against a metal fence, watching the afternoon sun slide lower and lower, its rays bouncing off the water and making everything shine.

"Beautiful, huh?" Larry says, hands deep in his pockets, staring at the river.

"Yeah." Nicky nods.

"Isn't this cool? Us in London?" Larry picks up his coffee, turns away from the river. Luna follows him, knowing it's just about time to head back to the hotel and change clothes.

"Yeah." Nicky shrugs, falling into step with her, his shoulder bumping hers.

"Hey, I've been thinking about that year off." Larry looks over Luna at Nicky. "I think it could be cool."

Luna smiles. She was hoping this would happen. 

"Yeah?" Nicky grins, surprised.

"Yeah." Larry nods. "What are you thinking?"

"Uh, I think I wanna DJ in Ibiza."

"What?" Luna raises her eyebrows. Not at all what she was expecting. "The Ibiza in Spain, that Ibiza?"

"In Ibiza?" Larry's having a very similar reaction to Luna. "Do you speak Spanish?"

Nicky's face has an oh-shit look on it, but he recovers quickly. "No, but that's the beautiful thing! It's about the music, it's not inhibited by the language barrier."

"No, but you are," Larry replies. "I mean, do you speak in beats?"

"Dad, why are you freaking out?" Nicky could probably have come on a little less strong with the whole stray-from-your-parents'-plan-completely thing. "You just said this was a really cool idea."

"I'm not freaking out." Larry shakes his head slowly. "I just want to understand what the plan is."

Now Nicky tries a different tactic: relating. "You didn't go to college."

"Wait, now we're talking about not going to college at all?" Larry frowns. 

Nicky's back to oh-shit. "Uh, maybe. I don't know."

"Nicky--Nicky, that's not--"

"Dad, you didn't go to college! You turned out fine!"

"I turned out okay after about twenty years and a lot of dead ends," Larry counters. 

"Yeah, whatever, man." Nicky shakes his head, turns away. "Don't worry about me. It's fine."

"Nicky, he's your dad." Luna takes Nicky's gloved hand, squeezes tightly. "It's his job to worry. And I'm your best friend, so it's my job to worry, too. We both want what's best for you, and you have to realize that maybe what's best isn't always what anybody wants. There's room for compromise, okay?"

Nicky sighs and squeezes back. "Why do you have to be right all the time?"

"Like I said, I'm your best friend." She grins. "It's my job."

Nicky gestures to the river. "Sun's going down. We should get going."

"To infinity and beyond." Luna grins, swinging their joined hands, and they head off to the hotel, where Larry changes into his night guard uniform, Luna changes into her work shirt, and they grab the bags they packed specifically for tonight. They've also rented a van, where the crates carrying Ahkmenrah and the tablet are hanging out until it's time.

The plan is to unload the crates into the museum, wait for the tablet to bring Ahkmenrah to life, and then he'll sneak Larry, Luna, and Nicky inside. But first they have to get him into the museum.

Larry drives up to the gate, and Luna and Nicky hide in the back, behind his seat, listening. There's a window that slides open, and a blonde woman wearing a uniform pokes her head out. "Hello," she says cheerily. "Welcome to the British Museum. My name's Tilly."

"Hi," says Larry awkwardly. "Thank you. Uh, I'm Larry Daley, from, uh, Natural History, New York."

"Yeah, yeah." Tilly nods.

"I got a delivery for your conservation department." Larry passes the clipboard with the information on it through the window.

"All right!" Tilly takes the clipboard, looks at it briefly. "So they--they let you travel?"

"Well, this is kind of unusual." Larry shrugs. 

"Well, they let me travel," Tilly replies. "You know where?"

"No."

"Home...here...home...back here. Off to the toot-toot. Five minute maximum." Tilly's gone from cheery to awfully depressed. 

Larry chuckles awkwardly. Luna turns to Nicky. "God, can we just get a move on?"

He shrugs. "She must be really lonely. I don't know."

Luna taps the back of Larry's seat and whispers, "We gotta go! Keep it moving!"

"Uh, is it cool if I just, uh, make my drop, and...?" Larry asks half-heartedly, like he doesn't really expect her to stop talking.

"Oh, yeah!" Tilly nods.

"Oh, thank God." Luna closes her eyes, thanking the heavens.

"But I will have to confirm."

"No." Luna leans her head against the seat, wanting to cry. 

"Okay, well, that's actually not necessary, because they've already confirmed it on the--the slip I gave you..."

But Tilly's picking up the phone, sitting down, and dialing. Larry sighs. "Okay."

Distantly, Luna can hear McPhee's voice, but she can't make out what he's saying. After a moment, Tilly walks back to the window. "All right. You is legit."

Larry smiles. "I is legit. Wonderful. Thank you."

"I'll open the gate," Tilly says. 

Larry drives through the open gate and opens the back door--Luna and Nicky sneak back into the front seat, curling up so that Tilly can't see them--and he and Tilly unload the massive crate. Tilly's still babbling on about her boyfriend, and Luna looks at her watch. It's already been almost half an hour, and they really need to get moving.

Finally, Larry climbs back into the driver's seat, shuts the door, and pulls out. Luna hops into the passenger's seat, and Nicky sits between them. "We good?"

"Good." Larry sighs, leaning his head back against the seat. "Now we just have to wait."

They park the van on the street just around the corner, and then sneak back to the museum, just before Tilly shuts the gate. They watch as she shuts the door and walks back to her shack, and the minute she falls asleep--which isn't very long--they hurry to the door.

Luna closes her eyes as the familiar feeling of the tablet coming to life washes over her: it feels like when you first step into a warm bath, familiar and comfortable.

"Did it work?" asks Larry cautiously.

Luna nods, opening her eyes. "He's awake." And she knocks loudly three times.

"I'm not an expert," Nicky whispers, slinging his backpack a little higher on his shoulder, "but this is feeling just really against the law."

"No, they have, like, a totally different legal system here," Larry replies, shaking his head. 

The door opens, and Ahkmenrah's there, smiling widely, tablet under one arm. Luna throws her arms around his neck, pulling him close. "Are you okay? How was the flight?" 

"Fine," he chuckles, kissing her temple. It still gives her butterflies, despite everything they've been through together. "Everything's fine."

"How we doing?" asks Larry, shutting the door behind them.

"All clear," says Ahkmenrah, nodding.

"All right. Let's go." Larry leads the way through the dusty conservation room, and Luna follows, holding Ahkmenrah's free hand tightly.

"Larry," Ahkmenrah says, almost hesitantly. "The others felt perhaps we could use some help."

"The others?" Larry frowns.

There's an explosion of packing peanuts, and Teddy appears out of the crate. "Lawrence!" He grins. "I couldn't sit idly by! Our very survival is at stake!"

"All right." Larry's processing. "Hey, Teddy, good. Good man to have in a crisis."

Another flurry of peanuts and Attila jumps up, spitting a few out of his mouth. He grins at Luna. "Lu-Lu."

"Attila. Okay, a little muscle." Larry nods. 

Sacagawea stands up, much more gracefully, and smiles gently. "Hi, Larry. Luna."

"That is a deceptively large box," Larry mutters, staring at the crate.

"Obviously, we came along too!" shouts a familiar voice, and two small men appear above the brim of Attila's hat. 

"You know you'd be lost without us, Gigantor," says Jed, shoving his hat back on his head. "You too, young lady."

"Are you serious?" Larry turns to Ahkmenrah. 

Dexter chirps sweetly, perching on the edge of the crate, as if to say, "Me too!"

"And the monkey." Larry sighs. "All right, basically everyone."

As if this wasn't enough, one of the Neanderthals came too--the one that was rumored to look like Larry. And he really does. Luna buries her face in Ahkmenrah's shoulder, trying not to laugh as the Neanderthal growls, "Dada!"

"Oh, no, no." Larry shakes his head vigorously. "No possible benefit whatsoever to..."

"Really wanted to come." Ahkmenrah shrugs, trying to hide his own joyful grin. 

"Uh, this is my son," Larry says, as the Neanderthal frowns at Nicky. "My actual son, Nicky. And this is Luna. Guys, this is Laaa."

"He's just tracking me," Nicky whispers, looking extremely uncomfortable. 

Laaa grunts unintelligibly, but he's definitely making fun of Nicky. Luna thinks he might even be a little jealous.

"Laaa." Larry looks done with this situation already. He points at Laaa warningly.

"So, Lawrence," Teddy says conversationally, climbing out of the crate and brushing packing peanuts off of his chest, "what's the plan of attack?"

"Uh, okay... We need to get to the Egyptian wing, find Ahk's father, and hopefully get the tablet fixed." Larry nods, thinking. "All of us."

And then Laaa dives into the packing peanuts, mouth open wide. Larry sighs. "Laaa, that's not for eating! That's not food! Don't--" He slaps his hand against the side of the crate, exasperated beyond belief. "All right, you know what? I got a job for you. Come on. Come on!"

He leads Laaa over to the doors, only after Laaa shoulder-checks Nicky arrogantly, and attempts--in vain, Luna thinks--to convince Laaa to "stand guard" against the doors, but surprisingly, Laaa gets it!

With a sigh, Larry pulls his flashlight out and joins them again. "Okay, listen up, guys," he says decisively. "This place is waking up for the first time and we have no idea what's out there, so stay together, all right?"

He and Nicky lead the way, followed by Attila, Luna and Ahkmenrah, and Teddy and Sacagawea, bringing up the rear. Ahkmenrah has the tablet in one hand and Luna's hand in the other, and very quickly, he shoves the tablet into Luna's backpack and takes her hand again. 

"Ahk, I just realized--" Luna leans up to his ear, her voice low-- "I'm meeting your parents."

Ahkmenrah's eyes widen and he grins happily. "Oh, they're going to love you!" And he whispers to her all about his mother, Shepseheret, and how her favorite color is sapphire blue and she always smells like lily flowers and she could never say no to dried dates; and about his father, Merenkahre, about his sternness and his power, but also his fondness for the lute and dancing, and especially his wonderful storytelling. 

Luna realizes with a pang that her own parents know nothing about Ahkmenrah. They don't even know she has a boyfriend! She's sure they suspect it--they probably think she's dating Nicky--but there's no way they could ever meet him, not plausibly.

Larry clicks his flashlight on as they turn into a particularly dark hallway, and Attila mutters something about how creepy it is in here. (In their downtime, reader, Ahkmenrah has taught both Larry and Luna Hunnish, and they're both extremely adept at it, to all of our surprise.)

"Yeah, I know it's spooky, big guy," Larry replies. "Just stay close."

Dexter chitters in response, somewhere near Luna's left foot. Ahkmenrah pulls her closer, his hand tightening around hers.

As they pass doorways into other exhibits, there's a clanking of metal and stone as statues and sculptures come to life, stretching and yawning. Larry turns into one in particular, full of Roman or Greek-looking statues, which all look very confused.

"What kind of haunted hootenanny is this, boys?" mutters Jedediah, hiding below the brim of Attila's hat.

Ahkmenrah scoops Dexter up onto his shoulder carefully, and Nicky breathes, "We're all finding this super creepy, right?"

"They're just a little freaked out," Larry replies, but even he doesn't sound so sure.

"First time we came alive, it took some getting used to," Teddy says calmly. 

As they pass a centaur with no arms, Larry waves half-heartedly. "Hey there. Just, uh--Just heading to Egypt."

Dexter leaps from Ahkmenrah's shoulder to Luna's, hiding his face in her hair as the centaur stands imposingly, watching their every move.

They move from the statue room into a hallway lined with heads of animals on the walls. Luna passes Dexter to Sacagawea, who murmurs in Shoshone, smiling, and Ahkmenrah takes her hand again. Neither of them feel like walking alone, and it's comforting to have his hand in hers, something like an anchor.

Larry slows, tilting his head to the side, and Luna slows down, too. It's so quiet that she can almost hear the pulsing of the tablet against her back, feel its warmth through the fabric of her backpack.

"Hear that?" Larry asks.

"Hear what?" Luna frowns.

And then she hears it: a thudding sound, like elephants or horses or--

A skeletal triceratops, loping into view, turning to face them with its empty eye sockets.

"That," Larry says quietly.

"We'll just be down here if anyone needs us," whispers Jedediah, and he and Octavius sink slowly beneath the brim of Attila's hat.

"We're not scared," says Octavius. "It's just more comfortable."

"Lawrence," murmurs Teddy. "I think it's safe to say we're in a bit of trouble."

"I know how to handle this guy." Larry walks over to the wall, where there's a large, unidentified tusk mounted to the wall. He looks up at the boar's head hanging over it. "Do you mind?"

The boar shakes his head vigorously.

"Thanks." Larry rips the tusk from the wall, brandishing it like a sword.

"Dad, what are you doing?" Nicky whispers, frowning incredulously.

"How do you think I tamed your pal Rexy?" Larry raises his eyebrows, then turns to the massive beast in front of them. "Hi there. I bet you're not so mean, are you? Huh? I bet you're not so mean. No, you're just a little puppy, right?"

Luna tucks her head into Ahkmenrah's shoulder as the triceratops leans down, its tail moving slowly from side to side, its head tilted slightly.

"You're just a little puppy who wants to play," Larry continues, waving the tusk. "You wanna play, huh? Wanna play fetch?"

Just like a dog, the triceratops whines, its massive tail wagging, and bends down, as if saying, "Yes, please!" Luna's jaw drops. "No. Way."

"Right?" Ahkmenrah whispers back.

"You wanna play with this bone?" Larry steps back, aims-- "Go fetch! Go fetch!"

The triceratops catches the tusk in its mouth--

Nicky and Luna look at each other, surprised grins on both of their faces--

And then the triceratops bites the tusk in half with ease, spitting the dust out.

"Lawrence," Teddy says uncertainly.

"Yeah?"

"May I suggest a different plan?"

"What?"

The triceratops roars, shaking the walls, and Teddy shouts, "RUN!"

Impulsively, Luna doesn't move, just closes her eyes, twists her fingers--

"Luna!" Ahkmenrah yells.

The triceratops freezes, mid-leap toward them, and the glow inside her thrums happily, glad to be used after so long. It's really like riding a bike; no matter how long it's been, it still comes naturally.

The others skid to a halt, and Larry sighs. "You know, I almost forgot you could do that."

"I don't know how long it'll last," Luna says, breathing hard. "But here--"

With one flick of her wrist, the triceratops is sitting like a dog against the wall. "That might be a little more confusing, buy us some more time."

"Come on!" Ahkmenrah grabs her hand and they run back the way they came, careening left and running straight through a pair of double doors.

"Close it!" Larry and Nicky slam the doors shut, and Luna stumbles, Ahkmenrah doing his best to support her as he runs himself. The glow flickers, the tablet's pulse stutters, and then there's a loud ROAR from a distance.

Larry slams the plank of wood down into the lock and steps back. Everyone holds their breath as the thundering sound of dinosaur footsteps grows closer, closer, closer--

Wait.

Nothing.

"Okay." Larry's breathing hard, too. "I think we're--"

And then the doors shatter into splinters as the triceratops shoves his head through. Ahkmenrah pulls Luna out of the way, behind one of the pillars and pushes her against it, shielding her with his body, the tablet between them. Luna's not sure if it's his heartbeat, the tablet's pulse, or both that she's feeling, but whatever it is, it's making her hands shake.

"Get back!" Larry shouts, waving his arms. "Everybody get back!" And he pulls a mace from a weapons stand and brandishes it at the dinosaur, while the others move against the wall.

Luna tries to stop the dinosaur, use the magic--but it won't come. The glow falters inside her for the first time, and Ahkmenrah's breath catches.

"Do you feel it, too?" she asks breathlessly, trying to force the magic to come.

He nods, struggling to stand. Luna pushes him against the pillar, reversing their positions, and closes her eyes, focusing on the glow. Imagines it as a circle. And then makes it bigger in her mind.

It's like there's an explosion inside her: the glow thrums back into rhythm, the tablet flares to life against her back, and the triceratops stops with its horns on either side of Larry, pushing him against a suit of armor. It's frozen, unmoving--but Larry's still stuck.

Just then, the suit of armor behind Larry comes to life. Larry ducks, and the suit of armor cracks its sword against the triceratops' horns, shoving it back a few feet. Luna twists her wrist to the left, and the triceratops, shaking its head, tucks its tail between its legs and runs out the doors, whimpering embarrassedly.

"Okay..." Nicky steps out from behind a pillar, eyes wide. "That was actually very cool."

The suit of armor whips off its helmet, revealing a very human head--a very handsome human head, one that looks oddly familiar--

"Sir Lancelot," says the knight, grinning at Luna. "At your service."

✦✧✦

this has got to be my favorite natm movie. i mean, so much ahk, so much lancelot, nicky, even hugh jackman (what a ridiculous name)--there's nothing not to love about this movie. i'm so happy rewatching it.

q: is hugh jackman a ridiculous name?

a: absolutely. it doesn't even sound real!