Syn

You belong to me.

"W-what?" It caught me off guard. Threw me off- kilter more like as I lost grip of my anger and stumbled over my previous train of thought. I had never belonged to anyone before, much less wanted to. But there was something exhilarating and addictive in the way the proclamation fell from her glossy lips.

I was hers. And suddenly it was as if there was nothing else in this world I cared or wanted to be.

I closed my eyes for a brief moment and shook my head. No. This wasn't the time to lose focus.

"What the fuck is this, Queen?" I gestured around before looking back at her.

She picked up a croissant from the tray and looked around the space. "A cell," she answered before taking a bite.

"You know that's not what the fuck I'm talking about." I let out an exasperated huff of air before running a hand through my hair. "What the hell am I doing in here?"

"Ah." She nodded. "I put you in here."

"Why?"

"Well." She set the food down and wiped her hands. "If it makes you feel any better, this was an almost last resort. I didn't want things to come down to this but you really didn't leave me a choice."

"You weren't meant to have a choice in this."

She snapped her fingers and pointed at me. "And that's where I feel like you're wrong." She hopped up from the bed, her heels echoing off the concrete floor. "I think I should have all the choice in it."

"Queen-"

"You know," she walked toward me, "there was a long period after you died where I did exactly what the fuck I wanted, and...it worked for me. Did people disagree? Yes. Were there casualties?" She considered her question before slowly nodding. "Obviously. But at the end of the day, I did what I thought was best- no disrespect to you or your father, of course, but I got a lot of shit done."

"Well, with no disrespect to you..." I began. "It wasn't exactly like you had much to lose."

"Ouch." She scrunched her brows, feigning hurt as her smile gave her away. "But no, I didn't. War with Heaven became a numbers game and I was fueled by my hatred of what they took from me. I started measuring people by their value to me and anyone who tried to stand in my way was immediately an enemy."

I tried to ignore how familiar that thought process felt. It was just what war did to a person. It desensitized you- clawed at your soul until you were a shell of a person. I never intended for it to happen to her. My father was supposed to be the one to bear it, not pass it on to her.

She tilted her head from side to side. "I can admit now that my thinking back then may have been a smidge unhealthy," she said. "But I think there's value in finding a balance between who I was then and who I am now."

"And who is that?" I asked her. "A maniac who kidnaps her fiancé?"

"Well, your point of view just puts a damper on things, doesn't it?" She asked me.

"I won't apologize for reality bursting this impulse bubble of yours," I said to her, taking a step toward. "And this was an impulsive decision that you've made here. I refuse to believe you spent longer than a second pondering this before you decided to put it into action."

I looked down at her but she kept my gaze, defiance still swirling in her eyes. "You're a little naive here and there, but you're not a fucking idiot. I understand that this grand gesture of yours has come from a place of desperation and as endearing as it may have been for the first few minutes, I'm done with it. I have shit to do now. Open the door."

She took a step back and relief flooded me for an instant as I thought she heard me and was going to obey. It must've slipped my mind that this was Queen I was dealing with after all.

"Wow," she whispered before clapping her hands slowly. She laughed a bit and held up her arm. "Look, actual fucking chills. You're really good at threatening people, baby. If it weren't for the fact that you're practically powerless in here...then maybe that could've worked."

"Queen, open-"

"I'm not opening anything and you're not leaving here yet."

"Open the fucking door!" I finally snapped at her.

"Don't raise your voice at me."

"Queen, I fucking swear on everything I'll--"

"You'll what?" She crossed her arms, a smile creeping its way onto her lips. "What will you do to me, Syn? I'm dying to see any type of fight from you at this point, honestly." Her last word dripped from her tongue like venom, patronizing and beckoning a reaction from me.

"Is that what this is then?" I asked her. "You plan to hold me here and piss me off to the point where I'll say fuck it and do what you want me to?"

"Hm." She tapped her chin. "I never considered that one- I considered a lot. But not that," she said. "Full transparency this entire thing could've gone differently. I almost paid to have myself kidnapped instead because certainly you'd give your life up but not before making sure I was safe." She thought out loud and my shock was evident.

Was she always a lunatic or was this a new development? Maybe there was a break in her psyche after finding out I'd be dying because nobody just did this. Nobody just thought about these things...

"Ultimately, this was the best plan," she said. "And I see how you're looking at me, Syn. I must seem like a truly different person to you." She sighed. "Truth is, this is more myself than I feel like I've ever been. I'm tired of things just happening to me- of all the fucking monsters that we have to deal with. I don't want you to be my hero anymore. And I don't want to be some damsel in distress, it's crippling. I want..."

She paused and for the first time since coming in here, I could see that bit of vulnerability seep through. She seemed hesitant, reluctant to speak her mind almost.

What could it be?

"I want to be the monster," she finished with a nod before looking up at me. "And if that turns me into someone you can hardly recognize or bear to look at, it'll hurt but I want to be authentic to myself. I can keep you alive, Syn. It'd be easier to do if you were on my side, but I will do it without you if I need to."

She was...truly something. The first and foremost being a fucking idiot, but the rest...I didn't know what to make of it.

I loved her. Everything in me knew that I engrained that very singular thought into her mind and soul but clearly, she had memory lapses.

"Stop speaking," I finally said to her. "You're pissing me off. Incomprehensibly."

"Me not wanting you to die--"

"No, just fuck that for a minute." I waved it away before taking a deep breath. "Your mind, as complex and intriguing it is to me daily may also harbor a brain that just fails to understand depth and continuously just thinks itself into these circuitous ruminations."

"You're saying words and I have no idea what they mean..." she whispered.

"You drive me insane. This search for clarity that you always try to do, yet fail at every day. If you're trying to find a singular thing I love about you then you'll be searching forever and if you're able to find a reason as to how or why I'd ever be able to stop then it is simply a figment of your imagination. The clarity you're searching for-- I've seen it in you from the moment we met.

"You are perfect, just as you are- however you are. Rambling freak, deranged kidnapper, or tyrant queen- I don't care. Quite frankly, I have no idea why you think I would for fuck's sake, the bar is in hell. Be a monster if that's what you feel like being, you already scare me every day. But if that's what you want, I will be one with you. All I ask is that you stop overthinking me. I'm fucking simple. If I were a build board it'd read 'I love Queen'. That's it and that's all. So long as you are you- whatever variation, I will cherish and admire you."

She stared at me in astonishment before dropping her head and letting out a huff of laughter. "You're making a lot of promises that you have no intention of keeping, aren't you?"

"What do you-" My words fell flat as I remembered our current predicament. The words just spilled out and I was too frustrated to catch myself. I uttered so many 'I wills' yet there was one big fucking 'can't' that still lingered in the air. It had to be less than twelve hours away. "I'm sorry."

She sighed before standing up and lifting something from the tray. "For a second there I thought you had changed your mind. Here," she held out a manilla folder from me. "Since you've already given up, might as well sign it and seal it."

I took the paper from her hands, my eyes still on her as our fingers grazed. "What is this?"

"I was pretty busy while you were asleep," she said. "The council was already aware of this predicament of yours because of your meeting yesterday- I was pretty pissed hearing how definite you made it all seem, but in the end, I guess it helped me out."

I pulled out the stack of papers from the envelope and looked down, curiosity stealing my gaze. Anger flared as I read the emboldened letters at the top of the front page and the papers were instantly crushed into my fists. "What the fuck is this shit?"

"What?" She shrugged innocently before crossing her arms. "You planned on stepping down anyway, might as well make it official before you jump ship, no?"

"No."

"No?" She raised a brow.

"I'm not signing this shit." I shoved the papers along with the envelope back to her and when they made contact with her chest, she let out an amused huff. This shit was funny to her? I was losing everything and she was laughing...

"O-kay." She clicked her tongue with a slow nod. "So you'll tie every loose end but this one."

"I will take care of it on my own. This is not how I am going to do it." I had already planned for Queen to take over the throne when I was gone but I didn't want to do it like this. Signing these papers would make it too real that I was no longer going to be around to rule. I had just hoped I'd be the Devil until my last breath and they'd figure the rest out after I was gone.

But she had different ideas. She was trying to erase me already. I wasn't some fucking marker on a whiteboard that could be snuffed out by an eraser- Felix? Perhaps. But with my reputation, I'd deduce my existence to wine on a white rug, if that. Blood on concrete would be more fitting.

I couldn't just be gone like that.

Yet here she was, the woman I had just professed my love to for the umpteenth time, attempting to use some rag and chemical agent to lift my stain from the universe. It hurt, but more than that, it infuriated me. It sent a hot rage through my skin that threatened to tear everything in this room apart. Including her.

"You lost the opportunity to decide how you wanted to do things when you started making all of these outlandish decisions," she spoke, easing the papers into the envelope. As if the funniest thought appeared in her mind, she paused, a laugh bubbling its way out of her, "Giving yourself to Heaven...please. It was a really cute idea though, I appreciate the sentiment."

I shut my eyes and took a deep breath to keep my temper at bay. Under different circumstances, I'd have applauded my restraint. "Queen," I finally spoke. "You can't do this."

Maybe I could reason with her.

"That's where you're wrong," she chirped with a smile before dangling the folder in front of me. "These were a formality really. Not only did I meet with the council where they informed me of how your last meeting went, but we had another vote for the throne."

"Queen..." I warned her- or myself. I didn't even know anymore. The only thing I knew was that my resistance was wearing this and I was a hair away from snapping.

"Yes, exactly that." She grinned. "I am quite literally the Queen again now."

I lost it. My hand was at her throat the moment the words escaped her mouth and her back was against the wall. She winced at the impact but there was hardly any fear in her eyes as she held my gaze- just that maddening flicker of challenge dancing in a pool of amusement.

"You know usually a 'congratulations' are in order," she choked out, placing a hand over the one at her throat. "And you should've told me sooner that all I had to do to get you to choke me was piss you off- I'll do it more often."

The dark thoughts that filled my head at her words had little to do with what she had done and more with her sexual suggestion. This was the woman who cried at every sappy moment in a rom-com-- hell, I'd even seen her fucking cry during one of Saint's cartoons. Aside from that, she had been through a lot...rough and sex in breathing the same air in a sentence where she was concerned did something I didn't like.

I was far from vanilla so this shit was fucking with me in more ways than one- my hard-on pressing against her serving as evidence enough...but I cared more about her comfort than my kinks. If there was something more she was into...she had never told me.

Would she tell the man who'd take my place next?

Fucking hell she was making me lose my shit. Only she could piss me off- pushing me to the brink of insanity yet pulling me in at the same time. I wanted to hurt her yet protect her at the same time. Kill her yet bring her back to life with my fingers and tongue- my thoughts and feelings were jumping from one violent extreme to a sexual one, my mind and body begging me to find some medium between the two for relief.

But this was depraved.

This place had to have hosted some serious torture sessions. I could see the pool of old blood in the far corner of the small room. The bed was a nice touch, but it couldn't cover a stain that big.

Regardless, I couldn't have her here. She was a candles, roses, and silk sheets girl. The best I could offer her here was a hard concrete wall or an icy metal door. I don't know why the thought of that didn't dissuade me more.

"It's taking everything in me," I gritted out, forcing my fingers to loosen their grip on her soft skin. I wouldn't do that to her- a few years ago I could've fucked any woman where I pleased but I couldn't reduce her to them. She meant more than that to me. No matter how fucking angry I was. "I will hurt you, Queen. I need you to either open the door or leave before I do something we'll both regret."

I dropped my hand and forced myself to take a step back. I could already see how this was going to go. She had no intention of letting me leave just yet. Letting me. I almost scoffed at that. It was bullshit and if she were anyone else, her neck would be snapped, freedom for the both of us be damned.

"I'll go. I have queen business to handle now." She pushed off the wall, rolling her eyes and that did me right fucking in. The last straw keeping any humanity I had in place was plucked by her delicate fingers. I was done.

Fuck. It. All.

꧁꧂

Author's Note

Hehehe, welcome to another week of "What has Ayisha's dark and twisted- yet beautiful and perhaps sexy mind conjured up?"
Stawppppp.
I'm blushing, even though you can't see it- not because I'm black but because we're over a computer phone🧍🏾‍♀️. Ignore me, I've been up since three a.m. and I'm SICK and exhausted.

I put my booty in these chapters and I hope y'all like how it taste🥹❤️Let me know, I can take it all✨