May 13, 2023

Queen

Wow. I walked toward him, crossing my arms. "How long have you been here?"

"Well, I was planning to go as far as I could...but I heard you scream. By the time I got here, you seemed to have it under control."

"And at what point exactly did you get here..." I asked cautiously.

"Mmm." He looked up at the sky in thought for a moment before looking back at me. "When they were messing with you, maybe."

"And you just watched?"

"As I said, you seemed to have it under control." He shrugged. "I stayed here in the very slight chance I was wrong, but I'm never wrong. You handled it."

"What if I didn't?" I questioned, irritation bubbling up inside me. Sure I was able to figure it out myself, but what if I hadn't? The situation could've easily gone left.

He sighed. "If you had half as much of the faith I have in you for yourself, you'd be unstoppable," he said. "You don't need me. And as scary as that is for me, it's the truth. We both know if you wanted to you could take me down- okay that part was greatly exaggerated, but you get my point."

"Pfft, I wouldn't say exaggerated. I'm sure I could."

"We'll see." He blew out smoke, his eyes trailing my body like they always did. I rolled my eyes at his lack of discretion and he smiled. "You don't get to be mad at me right now, it's my turn. Be fair and save the eye-rolling for later."

There was yet another shift in his emotions and he seemed a lot happier. Either that or he was conversing his despair with teasing and jokes. Knowing Syn as I did, I went with the second option and sighed, walking towards him, the smell of his cologne and the cigarette smoke filling my nose and reminding me of memories long ago.

"Syn," I said softly, looking up at him. "I'm sorry." He looked away from me, continuing to smoke as his joking act slowly disappeared and his true emotions came to the surface. "You're right, it took me way longer than it should've. I know that. I wasn't thinking about how that would hurt you, and I'm sorry. But I promise you it wasn't because I don't love you, I love you more than I love myself.  I just got caught up in my own...shit inside my head, which now that I think about is completely unfair to you," I told him. "I'm truly sorry."

He sighed, his body relaxing against the street lamp as he looked down at me. "It's okay."

"It's not," I said. "But I'll do better, you deserve more."

He winced. "Don't say that shit."

"It's true," I said. "I can be... self-involved sometimes," I muttered, looking down at my hands. "And you- you're nothing like that." I sighed, at a loss for words as the realization set in more and more. "I'll just do better."

When I looked back up at him, his eyes were focused on me, a studious gaze fixed onto his emerald eyes. I stayed quiet, patiently waiting for him to say anything at all. If that wasn't enough and he was still upset, I'd understand. I'd do what I needed to gain his forgiveness. Even if he did forgive me I'd spend forever trying to make up for all the times I was too focused on myself to see what was wrong with him.

"You talk a lot sometimes," he finally said, leaning off of the lamp and walking toward me. My mouth dropped and I got ready for my rebuttal but he placed a hand over my mouth. "Shh." He hushed me, looking deep into my eyes with a small smile on his face. With his hand still over my mouth, he took another hit from the cigarette and slowly blew it out into the sky. "I love your voice, Princess. And I adore the way you can go off on these tangents...but I've had a headache for the past few hours," he admitted. "So would it be okay with you if we could just...stay silent together for a bit?"

My heart ached for him as he mentioned his headache. His wanting to be alone made sense if he was in pain. He wanted to be alone somewhere quiet and I had messed that up.

I nodded and the corner of his lip curled up into a sexy smile that made my chest warm. He slowly dropped his hand, raising his brow to see if I'd disobeyed his wishes. When I stayed quiet, surprise filled his features and I rolled my eyes. I may have ranted quite a bit, but he didn't need to seem so shocked.

"Hmm." He hummed, eyeing me. "Smoke?" Between his fingers, he flipped the mouth of the cigarette to me. Why not? I reached out for it and he immediately moved it away before shaking his head and putting it back between his lips. "You're supposed to say no."

I crossed my arms, shaking my head at him and he held a hand out for me. I looked at it, my annoyance rolling off of me as my palm touched his. "I saw something I wanted to show you."

He walked onto the trail, pulling me along with him gently. I winced involuntarily after a few steps and Syn completely stopped walking and turned to me, rolling his eyes. "You realize I can smell the blood on your ankles, right?" He let go of my hand, kneeling in front of me. "I don't know why you even attempt to hide these types of things."

Because I don't want to hear that mouth- especially when I knew he was right. He'd always just tell me to stop wearing heels, but that could never happen. So I'd just continue pushing through the pain and he'd have to live with scolding me whenever I got caught getting hurt.

Beauty was pain. And although I had stripped myself of almost all the lessons my mother and sister had taught me, that one stuck with me. I didn't ever see that changing.

"Bend over my shoulder," he instructed, looking up at me. I gave him a strange look, not knowing exactly what he meant and he rolled his eyes before looking at me seriously. "Bend over, Queen."

I laid a hand on his shoulder, slowly and unsurely doing as he said. I bent over and when my hip his shoulder, he wrapped an arm around the back of my thighs and stood up, making me yelp. He adjusted me on his shoulder and I laughed in surprise. No one had ever carried me like this except him. And even though the blood always started to rush to my head after a few minutes, I liked how effortless it was for him.

He removed the heels from my feet and when I heard them clatter to the ground, I gasped. "Syn, those were expensive!"

"I'll buy you new ones," he mumbled. He continued walking with me still thrown over his shoulder and I watched in terror as he passed my heels.

"No, no, no, please—"

He smacked my ass making me curse out loud. I felt the rumble of a chuckle leave his mouth and my cheeks heated as my butt cheek stung. It hurt, it really did. But I was more turned on than anything...

"Oh," he said, continuing to walk as he rubbed the spot he struck. "Is that all it takes to silence you?" I stayed quiet, my face burning with embarrassment as he continued laughing.

I could only look at the floor as Syn continued to walk. After a few moments, Syn turned to the left- off the trail ahead, and into the forested area. He carefully walked past rocks and maneuvered past countless trees until he made it to a place with green grass. "Here we are," he said.

He placed me down on the ground and the world tilted as my head became dizzy. "Woah." Syn held me still. "Be careful." I blinked a few times, rubbing my eyes a bit before looking at where we were. Behind us was the woods we came from, but in front of us was a lake. The dark water reflecting the scarce stars in the sky. Grass and overgrown plants bordered the destitute waters and trees surrounded the area.

There was a small wooden dock ahead of us but from what I could see there were no boats. Meaning this was yet another forgotten stream into a larger body of water. I didn't know how I never discover it. It was beautiful- especially right now as I watched Syn looking at it.

"I found it a couple of weeks ago," he said, glancing at me. "I was in the area..."

Stalking me.

"It reminded me of you," he added.

I smiled, raising a brow. I couldn't decipher a comparison between this place and me so I was left a bit perplexed as to what he meant. He rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, crossing his arms as he took a look around. After a few moments of silence, he looked at me. "Okay, I've had enough quiet—"

"Finally." I breathed out.

He smiled at me. "Was that too hard for you, Princess?"

I walked past him, heading to the dock, and paying no mind to the cold, wet grass below my bare feet. "A little bit. I'm still upset about my shoes."

"You'll be fine." He followed after me.

I stepped onto the dock, the faint running of the water flowing beneath it. I heard the sound of Syn's shoes hitting the wood as he came closer to me and I smiled as memories of the last time we were at a lake floated through my mind. I wondered if he still had that place.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked me.

"Hmm." I looked at him, trying to hold back a smile. "Nothing."

His eyes moved to my lips before roaming back to my eyes as he smirked. "Yes, the hidden lake is still in Juva." He shook his head. "I go there sometimes to clear my head."

"Mmm." I crossed my arms. "You better not have been there with anyone else." He laughed at my statement, making it seem like it was absurd, but we hadn't been together in a long time and that place was a fucking good place to get a girl to fall in love.

When he saw that I wasn't laughing, he stopped but his smile spread. "You're serious..."

"As a heart attack."

"Why would I take anyone but you there?"

"I was just curious."

He folded his arms across his chest. "Curious and jealous, aren't we?"

I shook my head and looked away from him, fixating my eyes on the water. "How could I be jealous? We weren't together."

"The same way I'm jealous when anyone so much as looks at you," he said. "Jealousy doesn't stop or begin at a relationship status. I was jealous of everyone who was even able to speak to you, and that was long before you and I even kissed."

"Mmm." I smiled to myself, butterflies floating through my body. "You should work on that."

"You first," he quipped. "I know you were fuming back then when I spoke to any woman."

"Yeah, right!" I laughed. "I was not."

"Lie again."

"Whatever." I giggled, shaking my head. He was right, but he didn't need to know that. I bit my lip, looking at him before looking at the water and I tilted my head up at him. "Do you want to go for a swim?"

"Right now?"

"Mhmm." I nodded, lifting my shirt above my head and tossing it to the floor.

Syn took a step toward me, looking around as he attempted to shield my body from whatever secret creatures had to be watching us in the night. I grinned, slightly blushing at his concern as I unbuttoned my jeans. At the sound of my zipper opening, Syn's head snapped back down to me and I watched as his breath hitched.

His gaze softened at my body as he slowly let his eyes travel, and I bit my lip to hold back my ever-growing smile. "Princess..." he said breathlessly before opening his mouth to say another word, but his words failed him.

I laughed softly, lowering my pants to the floor before stepping out of them and standing in front of him in only my bra and panties. "Yes, Syn?"

"I don't want anyone but me seeing you...like this," he said lowly.

"No one is here, Syn."

"And if someone happens to come?"

"Well then." I shrugged, unclipping my bra and letting it slide down my arms. His eyes fell to my chest and I watched his body tense- almost as if it was painful to see me yet not be closer. "Give them something to watch."

"Queen..." he swallowed.

"Syn," I whispered, walking in front of him and placing my arms around his neck. "What are you so afraid of?"

He looked into my eyes, his hands hesitantly touching my hips as he took a deep breath. "I don't want to hurt you. It's not easy for me to control myself around you these days..."

"Okay." I nodded. "So stop."

"Stop what?"

"Trying to control yourself so much...

...I can handle it. I promise."

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Author's Notes
Ohhh to be a fish in that water for what's about to happen😩

Oh em geeee I'm excited hehe. I hope y'all enjoyed the chapters❤️ I will do random uploads like this sometimes hehe. HAPPY HALLOWEEN HOEZ!!

✨lmk your thoughts✨

*next upload date is on my message board*