May 6, 2023

Queen

My eyes landed on Syn standing in front of the elevator and my mouth dropped. He looked fine. In fact, he looked more than fine. His dark suit clung to his body and the top button of his dark shirt was unbuttoned, exposing the top of his tattoos. His fresh cologne lingered in the air in front of me and it didn't smell like death...

This fucker was absolutely fine!

"You're not dead," I said slowly.

"Why would I be dead, Princess?" He grinned.

"You haven't been answering your phone."

He patted his chest and pant pockets before frowning and I raised a brow. "I think I lost it...but what's the big deal? I just saw you yesterday..."

"Yesterday?" I asked in surprise. "It's been three days, Syn."

"What?" He furrowed his brows. "I could've sworn..." He squinted his eyes, taking another sip of his drink and I crossed my arms. Taking my eyes off of him, I looked behind him to see the dark and crowded living room. Music was blasting in the background as they danced and I grimaced at the scene of a naked girl laying on the counter with alcohol being drunk off of her body.

"You're partying right now?" I asked. "It's two p.m."

"Well, it's midnight somewhere in the world," he gave me a sly grin.

"You don't even like parties, Syn..."

"Says who?"

"You," I reminded him. "This isn't your thing."

"Maybe not." He sighed. "But life is a lot better this way." I opened my mouth to say something else, but Stella interrupted and wrapped her arm around his. The worst part was Syn didn't even flinch while she did it. They stood in front of me like some power couple and I wanted to throw the fuck up. I hated that they looked good together. Syn was...Syn and Stella— she was a damn bombshell.

"Queen, it's so nice to see you," she greeted me. "I couldn't help but overhear and I'm so sorry he's been radio silent. I've been keeping him a bit too preoccupied." She giggled. "Would you like to come in?"

I wasn't in the mood to party, but I didn't want to leave without knowing what was going on.

"Umm, sure." I nodded. I stepped into the condo and followed behind Stella and Syn as they headed towards the sitting area. They sat down on a loveseat where Stella made herself comfortable on Syn's lap and I ignored the pain in my chest as I sat across them.

"Are you alright, Queen?" She asked. "You seem a little tense. Relax a bit, we're just all having fun here."

"Right." I nodded slowly. Syn's eyes remained on me as if he was studying me and under a different setting I would've lost my composure, but right now I just wanted to prod his mind and knock some sense into him.

I sat in boredom as everyone socialized. I didn't even bother introducing myself and I knew I was being rude, but the people here weren't people I wanted to know. I was concerned why Syn was even with them in the first place. After a few minutes, Stella waved her hand to get my attention.

"Do you want a drink?"

"No, thank you."

"Oh?" She raised a brow. "Something stronger?"

"No," Syn finally spoke up. For the first time since I got here, his senses seemed to be back as he glared at Stella.

"Oh, come on. Don't be a party pooper," she said. "Queen, do you?"

"Stella," Syn said in a low and grave tone. "Shut the fuck up."

"Ugh." She rolled her eyes. "Fine." She ran her hands through her long hair before smiling at me once again. "So that double date we talked about the other day—"

"It's not happening," Syn said lowly.

"But—"

"Stella, please," he said in annoyance as he rubbed his temples. "Just drop it."

"Okay, I'm going to get you a drink because you're kind of being an asshole right now," she said with a huff as she stood up.

"I don't think he needs another—"

"I think I know what he needs, okay?" She snapped at me. My brows raised in surprise at her reaction and she sighed before shaking her head and smiling. "Sorry, I'm a little out of it." She swallowed. "I'll be right back."

Slightly unsettled by what transpired, I looked back at Syn. "Where have you been?"

He shrugged. "I've been here."

"Yeah, obviously," I scoffed. "But you haven't come over and I figured that since you came to New York for your son in the first place that you wouldn't let three days lapse..."

"I didn't realize three days had passed," he said, running a tired hand through his black hair. "I promise I'll come tomorrow."

"Are you sure that's a promise you can keep?" I asked, looking around. "From the way things are looking right now, you may be strung out for the week."

"I promise, Queen."

"Okay..." I nodded, standing up. "So I'll just leave you guys be then." My voice unintentionally lifted in a question, making my uncertainty evident. He was a grown man and was more than capable of taking care of himself, but I didn't like seeing him like this. I'd only seen him drunk once in all the years I knew him. This was never a habit.

The fact that it was happening right now made me wonder if there was something I was missing. I knew this past year wasn't easy for him, but he'd tell me if something serious was going on, right?

"Okay," he whispered.

I bit my lip, turning on my heel to head towards the elevator. The closer I got, the stronger a tug in my stomach urging me to stay got. I tried to ignore it, pressing the button as I crossed my arms. Eyes forward, I told myself. Syn wasn't mine anymore. Whatever he did wasn't my business, no matter how badly I wanted it to be.

Failing at the simple mission I had set for myself, I looked over my shoulder. Stella was back next to Syn, pressing her body against him as she held a drink to his lips. My eyes drifted to Syn who seemed to be struggling to keep his eyes open and I frowned. Did I miss that?

Seconds ago when I was in front of him he wasn't fully alert but at least he was aware. Now it seemed like all the effects of alcohol were hitting him and he couldn't keep himself up. Either I missed it or he was one hell of an actor.

I watched as Stella tried to urge him to take the drink and disgust suddenly steered my feet into action. I marched back to the couch, snatching the drink from her hand and tossing it to the floor. The shattering noise ring throughout the room, making everyone's eyes turn to me, but I didn't pay them any mind.

"Move," I snapped at Stella as I grabbed Syn's arm. His eyes fluttered open as he looked up at me with a confused look on his face. Stella tried to take his arm and keep him on the couch but with one threatening glance from me, she pouted and let go. With him now free from her grip, I helped him stand up and placed his arm over my shoulder. "Come on," I urged softly as we walked towards the stairwell.

"Where are we going?" He asked, slightly stumbling as we walked.

"To bed."

"Oh?"

"To sleep, Syn. You're going to sleep."

"I'm not tired," he said as we carefully climbed the steps.

"I don't care."

"How rude."

Remembering where his room was the last time I was here, I navigated through the dark hallway until I reached his door. I pushed it open with my free hand and locked the door behind us before guiding Syn to the bed. He dramatically fell on his back onto it, making me fall in turn and I tensed as I landed on him.

After a few moments of quiet, I peeked up at him. His eyes were closed and his chest rose and fell slightly as the seconds passed. I gently moved to lift myself off of him, but his arms wrapped tighter around me. "Queen."

"Yes?"

"I need to pee."

"Then let go of me and go." I wiggled in his arms but barely budged as his arms stayed around me. "Syn—"

"Come with me."

"What? No. Why?"

"If I let go of you you're going to leave."

"What if I promise I won't?"

He remained quiet, the faint music from the party being the only sound to float in the air. I would've thought he fell asleep if it weren't for the slight movement of his thumb on my back. Given how out of it he was, it would surprise me if he didn't hear what I—

"I couldn't trust that."

His response pinched at my heart and I frowned. I wanted to ask him what he meant, but this wasn't the time for such a loaded conversation. Besides, I'm sure I wouldn't be able to focus with the strong scent of alcohol he was emitting. His shirt was docked with it after Stella tried to make him drink whatever concoction that was.

I cleared my throat. "Okay, come on. You need a shower too while you're at it." His chest rumbled with laughter as he let go of me and I raised myself to my feet. Kneeling at the foot of the bed, I removed his shoes and socks. When I was done, I grabbed his hands and pulled him up until he was sitting at the edge of the bed. He groaned as I did and I sighed. "You're going to need to help me a little bit."

"Mhmm."

I pushed his suit jacket over his shoulders and he weakly pulled his arms out. I tossed the jacket to the bed and he attempted to unbutton his shirt, but when he kept fumbling I moved his hands away and tried to do it myself. "No." He covered my hands with his, stopping me. His bright green eyes looked up at me as he shook his head and I gave him a confused look. "I'm shy."

"Syn, stop playing." I laughed softly.

"Turn the lights off...please."

"The lights aren't on." I pointed at the large window near us. "It's daytime outside." If I was trapped downstairs in that party I would've thought it was nighttime too."

"Close them," he whispered.

"You're being so weird." I smiled before shaking my head and removing my hands from his. I walked to the windows, pulling the thick black curtains over them until not an ounce of light was in sight. "Better?" I turned towards the direction of the bed, not being able to make out anything.

"Mhmm," he hummed deeply.

"Syn, you're the only one of us who can see in the dark so you're going to have to help me here," I said, squinting my eyes and taking slow steps to where I thought the bed was.

"Walk three steps left." I did as he said, but instead of another direction, I heard the click of his tongue. "No, the other way."

"You mean right?"

"Right," he said. "That one."

"You are absolutely no help."

With a gust of wind flashing past me, I felt his warm breath on my neck. "Where do you want to go?"

I swallowed a lump in my throat. "I was trying to go to you, but since you're here." I took a step forward to get some distance between us. "Let's go to the bathroom."

I felt a hand on my lower stomach as I was pulled against him and my breath hitched at the feel of his body behind me. "Are you okay?" He whispered.

"Y-you're the drunk one, Syn. I'm fine."

"Do you want to dance with me?"

My face scrunched up at the randomness of his statement and I removed his hand from my lower stomach. It was a move so I could turn and face him, but it was also to provide me with some peace of mind. He may have had no problem laying a hand on the part of me I was most insecure about, but I felt like I was going to die.

"Don't you need to pee?"

"I can hold it."

"Syn—"

"Dance with me."

"You don't even dance!"

"I want to right now," he said softly. "Please?"

"Okay." I sighed. "Are you going to turn on music or...?"

"Fuck the music."

He pulled me against me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, catching me off guard. He began swaying slightly and after a few moments of getting used to the movement, I wrapped my arms around his torso. Whatever we were doing wasn't even close to dancing, but I'd take whatever I could.

It felt nice being in his arms like this.

His chin rested on top of my head as he hummed an unrecognizable tune and I smiled to myself. Syn SinClaire; an enigma is what he would continue to remain. After all these years I still hadn't figured him out. One moment I'd feel like I knew him more than anyone, then in the next, the carpet would be pulled from under me and I'd meet a side of him I never knew.

I was certain I'd love the him deep down as much if not more than the one he showed and controlled, but he was adamant on never opening up. What hope was there for us if that remained the case? Did Stella know the things he so desperately tried to keep from me?

My eyes watered as my thoughts went wild, but I pushed them down as best as I could. Now wasn't the time for me to be so negative.

"Okay, now I really need to use the bathroom," he said.

I giggled. "Okay."

He led the both of us there and I made sure he didn't fall with a steady arm around him. Once we were inside, I flipped the light switch on and we both winced at the sudden brightness. "Fuck," he groaned, letting go of me as he rubbed his eyes. He swayed slightly in his spot and I reached an arm out to steady him.

"Be careful, Syn," I said as we walked to the toilet. "Uh, do you need help with...umm—" I pointed down nervously and he smiled down at me with a lazy smile.

"Pulling my dick out?" He said simply.

"Syn..."

"I assure you I can manage," he said. "Unless you're just into that—"

"I hate you." He laughed and I turned away and headed to the shower to give him his privacy. I slid open the walk-in shower and stepped to the side where the stream of water wouldn't hit me before looking at the dials. There was no indication of which one was hot or cold so I just flipped the one on the left.

Immediately, freezing cold water hit me from all angles and I screamed as I was attacked by the streams. They hit my face from every direction I turned and in an effort to turn it off, I slipped and fell on the wet marble floor.

"Hey, hey." Syn rushed into the shower and lowered himself in front of me. "Are you hurt? What happened?"

"What do you think happened?" My lip quivered as I tried to hold back a cry at the pain in my wrist and knees. He unzipped my boots and pulled them off my legs. His eyes roamed across my skin and when he saw a bruise, his fingers gently roamed across it and I winced.

"You'll be okay in a few seconds," he said softly, taking my hurt hand into his. "Just breathe, okay?"

I nodded and he sat with me quietly, letting the water soak his dress shirt and pants. The pain began to fade along with the dark bruise and after a few seconds, I was completely fine. There was a faint lingering pain reminding me of what occurred only minutes ago, but I was okay.

My attention was now on Syn who was still silent and staring off at the floor. Seemingly feeling my eyes on him, his head swung in my direction as he leaned his head against the wall. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Not doing this before..." he said, his eyes solemnly looking into mine with sadness and another emotion I couldn't place. It looked like some sort of longing...

"I don't..." I shook my head. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Ignore me." He shook his head.

I studied him and his expression, trying to figure out what was going on. His fingers rubbed circles onto my knee soothingly and I looked at our place in the shower. It was then that I realized what I had seen in his eyes wasn't longing...

It was regret.

Regret at what happened between us.

꧁꧂

Author's Note
*Stella after seeing Queen take Syn upstairs*

Lmfaoo I missed these😭but on a serious note, WHAT. THE. FUCK. That shit that sis tried to pull was kinda twisted...but ok.

What do y'all think about this chapter because I'm not sure what to even say right now? Did Syn really lose his phone? How did he miss three days?? What was up with him at the end?👀

So many questions and no answers as of yet😮‍💨

Lmk what y'all think✨❤️