The bell chimed as we walked into the cozy little café, our usual spot after college. The place was buzzing with familiar warmth, and the smell of freshly made coffee and cakes drifted over us. Sidharth grinned, holding the door open for me with an exaggerated flourish.

"Your highness," he teased, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

I rolled my eyes, fighting the smile that always came so easily around him. "Thank you, kind sir."

We both laughed, and settled into our usual booth, the one by the window. He ordered his usual black coffee, and for me, he ordered a mocha-already knowing I needed something sweet today. When our drinks arrived, he slid a plate of chocolate cake in front of me without even asking.

"Figured you could use a pick-me-up," he said, smirking.

I tried to play it cool, but my heart was already racing. Every small gesture, every thoughtful act he did so naturally, made me fall even deeper. I took a bite of the cake, savoring the rich chocolate, feeling like each moment was sinking me further into a hopeless crush.

Did he have any idea how much this all meant to me?

"Probably not," I reminded myself.

"So," he said, leaning back with that familiar, easy smile. "How's life treating you, Miss Shehnaaz?"

"Oh, you know, the usual," I said, taking a sip of my mocha to hide my smile. "Nothing I can't handle." I winked.

His eyes sparkled with amusement. "Yeah? You sure you're not just putting on a brave face?"

I shrugged, deflecting. "A girl's gotta keep some secrets."

He chuckled, but his gaze lingered on me, searching for something. "Secrets, huh? Now I'm curious."

My heart skipped, but I laughed it off. "Don't get too nosy like those neighbor aunties, Sidharth." I teased him.

He frowned, "I might not be a aunty, but definitely your neighbor, Ms. Shehnaaz."

"Whatever, Mr. Sidharth." I smirked.

"You're crazy,"

We laughed together as we shared the chocolate cake, falling back into our rhythm.

"Remember when you made me that terrible birthday cake?" Sidharth teased, leaning back in his chair with that mischievous glint in his eye. "I thought I'd never forgive you."

I laughed, nudging him. "You ate every bite of it, though!"

He shrugged. "I couldn't let your hard work go to waste, could I?"

Our laughter died down, and I couldn't help but glance at him, the words caught on the tip of my tongue. How could he be so close yet so far? Was he really so oblivious? Or was he choosing to ignore it, because that was easier?

We continued talking, bantering as we always did, yet each laugh, each lingering glance, left me feeling like we were dancing around something unspoken. I knew I shouldn't read too much into it, but it was impossible to ignore.

Later that night, after completing my assignment, I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling, trying to silence the thoughts that refused to let me sleep. Memories of Sidharth floated around in my mind, each one confusing me more than the last. I wasn't sure if he even knew what he was doing to me. Every time I thought I had him figured out, he'd throw me off balance with something so... unexpected.

Like my birthday last year. I remember feeling a bit left out at the party, just watching everyone laugh and dance. Then, out of nowhere, Sidharth appeared beside me. He touched my shoulder, just a small gesture, but it felt like his whole presence was wrapping around me. And the way he looked at me-his eyes softened, his usual teasing smile replaced with something that seemed almost... tender.

"Happy Birthday, Shehnaaz," he'd said, voice low, as if the words were just for me.

I thought maybe, just maybe, he felt something deeper. But the very next day, he laughed it off. "That was just me being a good friend," he'd said, his tone light, like that moment hadn't meant anything to him at all.

And it wasn't just that one time. There was that day he'd brought me coffee out of the blue. I'd joked, asking if he was trying to impress me, and he'd just shrugged it off with a playful grin.

"I'm just keeping my best friend fueled," he'd said. But the way he'd handed it to me, the way he watched me take the first sip, it had felt like something more.

One afternoon at college, I stumbled on the stairs outside the library, too caught up in a daydream to notice the step. Before I could even react, Sidharth was right there, steadying me with both hands on my shoulders.

"Careful," he murmured, his voice unusually soft, his hands lingering as he looked at me with concern. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, my voice barely above a whisper. His hands didn't move immediately, his gaze holding mine for just a second too long before he cleared his throat and let go, quickly returning to his usual teasing smile.

"Jeez, I can't leave you alone for a second, can I?" he joked, rolling his eyes. "You'd trip over thin air if I wasn't around."

I laughed it off, but as I walked beside him, I couldn't shake the warmth of his touch or the way he'd looked at me-like he really, truly cared. It made my heart ache in that bittersweet way I was starting to get used to.

Then, another time, we were at the park, lying on the grass, staring up at the clouds like we'd done a thousand times before.

"Look at that one!" I pointed, trying to steer the conversation away from my lingering feelings. "It looks like... I don't know... a dragon?"

He tilted his head, squinting at the sky. "Maybe. But if it's a dragon, it's a really weird-looking one."

I nudged him with my elbow, laughing. "Oh, come on, use your imagination!"

He grinned, watching me with that amused expression he always got when I talked too much. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say, dreamer."

There was a pause as he glanced over at me, his face softening. "I like that about you, you know," he said quietly. "You see things in a way other people don't."

My heart fluttered, and I had to look away, fighting the smile that threatened to take over my face.

Did he even know how much words like that meant to me?

Probably not.

One evening, after we'd spent hours together working on an assignment, he insisted on walking me home. As we walked down the quiet street, he noticed I was shivering in the cool night air. Without a word, he slipped his jacket off and wrapped it around my shoulders.

"There. Better?" he asked, his gaze so warm it felt like another layer of comfort.

"Yes, thanks," I managed, feeling his scent surrounding me. It was a simple gesture, yet one that left my heart racing.

"Can't have you freezing to death," he added, shrugging as if it was the most casual thing in the world.

But the way he looked at me, lingering just a beat too long before turning away-it made me feel like there was more he wanted to say but he didn't.

Then there were the times he'd catch someone looking at me a little too closely, and he'd suddenly switch from his usual carefree self to someone serious, protective. Once, while we were at the college café, a guy from our class came over and started talking to me, leaning in a bit too close. Sidharth's jaw clenched as he watched, his fingers drumming against the table.

"Hey," he interrupted, his voice firm. "Do you need something?"

The guy quickly backed off, muttering something under his breath as he walked away. When I looked back at Sidharth, he was already pretending nothing had happened.

"Jeez, Sidharth," I laughed, trying to lighten the moment. "You act like you're my bodyguard."

I wanted to say boyfriend though.

He shrugged, smirking. "Someone has to look out for you."

There was a glint in his eye that gave me pause. Did he even realize how protective he was, or what it meant to me?

"No, I don't think so." I shook my head, smiling.

Another moment that stuck with me happened on a rainy day. We'd been caught in a sudden downpour, with only his small umbrella between us. Huddled together under the flimsy cover, we made our way back to his house, laughing and stumbling as we dodged puddles.

By the time we got to his doorstep, we were both soaked, despite our best efforts. I started to shiver, and he immediately took my hand, guiding me inside and offering me a towel.

"Stay here. I'll grab you something dry to wear," he said, disappearing into his sister's room to find some clothes for me.

When he came back, I took the clothes with a grateful smile. "Thanks, Sidharth."

"Anytime," he said, watching me with an unreadable expression before looking away.

Later, as I was drying my hair, he leaned against the doorway, his gaze soft as he watched me.

"You know, Shehnaaz... sometimes I wonder what I'd do without you around to mess up my life," he said, smirking to cover the sincerity in his tone. But I could see right through it.

"Oh, please," I teased back. "You'd be so bored without me, and you know it."

We shared a smile, one that lingered far longer than it should have. In that moment, I felt closer to him than ever, like there was an invisible thread connecting us.

But what did it mean? I thought as he looked away, returning to his usual carefree self. Was he just being a good friend, or was there something he wasn't admitting?

Finally, there was one evening when he found me alone in the college library, exhausted from studying. He pulled out the chair beside me, sliding a chocolate bar across the table without a word.

"Your brain fuel," he said simply, a gentle smile tugging at his lips.

"You know me too well," I replied, feeling the tension of the day melt away in his presence.

He leaned back, crossing his arms as he watched me unwrap the chocolate. "Of course I do," he said, almost defensively. "Someone has to take care of you when you forget to take care of yourself."

The way he said it, like he'd gladly take on that role forever, left me speechless. Because, that day, I was on my period and I was craving for some chocolate, and he got it for me.

Just a soulmate thing, I guess?

These mixed signals were driving me crazy. His words always said I was just his best friend. But his actions-they said something else, something I was too scared to put a name to.

It was the next day, and I was at his place, chatting with his elder sister, Arpita, while he was out running an errand. Arpita and I had always been close; she was like an older sister to me. She does a corporate job and seemed to have everything figured out, a boyfriend and all. They're even planning to get married next year. She'll be 26 and he'll be 28. Tarun, her boyfriend was her senior in college.

As we sat together, sipping tea, she gave me a knowing look. "You know, Shehnaaz, I'm not blind."

I blinked, caught off guard. "What do you mean?"

She raised an eyebrow, leaning in with a smirk. "You like Sid, don't you?"

My cheeks flushed, and I immediately tried to deny it. "Arpita, it's not like that. Sidharth and I... we're just best friends."

"Oh, come on." She laughed, giving me a playful nudge. "Trust me, Shehnaaz, my brother is an idiot. If he has feelings for you, he won't even know it until someone spells it out for him."

"Don't say that." I tried to defend him, even though a part of me knew she was right. Sidharth could be frustratingly oblivious.

She shook her head, chuckling. "No, seriously. Even if he has some feelings for you, he'd never acknowledge it on his own. If you want him, you might have to give him a push."

Her words lingered in my mind long after she'd said them. Was it true? Was he just too blind to see what was right in front of him? Or maybe... maybe he was scared to acknowledge it, just like me. The thought gave me a small flicker of hope.

That night, as I lay in bed, I replayed the conversation with Arpita over and over again. What if Sidharth did feel something but was just too afraid to risk our friendship? Or too clueless to realize it? And if that was the case, could I really blame him? After all, here I was, too scared to tell him how I felt.

But how long could I keep waiting, hoping he'd somehow wake up one day and see me in a new light?

I knew I couldn't stay silent forever. I had to try. For the sake of my own heart, I needed to know if there was even the slightest chance that he felt the same way. Otherwise, I'd never be able to move on.

••

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