┗━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┛

Rafe calmed down eventually and suddenly, he was back to the boy who looked at Annabelle like she was the only girl in the world. He was gentle again, and she forgot why they were even fighting in the first place.

Now, everything felt numb. Her limbs moved on muscle memory as Rafe gently helped her out of her clothes, guiding her into the shower with a silence that somehow said more than all the shouting before. The water was warm, but it didn't reach her bones. Every muscle in her body struggled to fight back the river of tears that threatened to blur her vision. She couldn't help but feel like everything was falling apart as she was watching with helpless eyes.

Rafe didn't speak. He just moved slowly, running the soap over her arms, her back, rinsing her hair with careful fingers. His touch was feather-light, reverent. Like she might shatter if he pressed too hard. He wanted to wash away every tear and every tensed muscle along with the pain that rested under her skin. He wanted to wash away every word and insult that JJ had tossed her way. He wanted to wash away the shouting from the fight they had earlier.

Rafe turned the shower of and replaced the heat from it with a towel straight from the towel warmer before carefully pulling her damp hair back, his hands lingering on her skin. His lips met her forehead — warm and soft — and for a fleeting second, she felt safe. Just for a second.

"You're okay," Rafe whispered, his hands rubbing gently up and down her arms, his touch tender in a way no one else ever saw from him. Then he lifted her wrist to his lips, kissing the faded bruise there from the night with her father — the one she didn't talk about anymore but still lived inside her every day.

She stared up at him, but she didn't need to say anything. Her eyes said enough.

The girl stayed in the bathroom for a few beats as Rafe slipped out and into their bedroom. She stared at her reflection. Eyes puffy and red, skin painted with betrayal and her features numb. She didn't look like herself. She looked lost, like the ghost of someone who used to belong somewhere.

When she stepped into the bedroom, Rafe had laid out a pair of his gray sweatpants and his blue hoodie — the one that smelled like his cologne and saltwater. It tugged a soft smile from her lips for the first time that night. She changed, the fabric swallowing her up in warmth and familiarity. She didn't even realize how cold she'd been until the sleeves of the hoodie slid over her skin.

Moments later, Rafe came in with two sodas tucked under one arm and a chocolate bar in the other.

"Come on," He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and guided her to the bed but the girl was brought to a halt. He looked down at her, confused furrows appearing between his brows. "What's wrong?"

She wrapped her arms around herself, the sleeves falling over her hands. "I need to talk to Kiara."

His expression fell, even if he tried to hide it. "Seriously?"

"She's my friend, Rafe." Annabelle said. "She knows me better than anyone. She's known me long before all of this and-"

"You mean before me," Rafe's mutter cut her off. His voice had a hint of annoyance in it but mostly it just sounded raw.

"No," she said quickly, stepping toward him. "It's not like that."

"Then what is it then?"

The girl swallowed hard. She couldn't handle this blowing up into another argument. "She's my best friend. I have to try and solve this now."

His tongue clicked against his teeth. "I know. I know you're right." He let out a breath through his nose, taking a step closer. "I just hate seeing you like this. Seeing that they've hurt you."

She breathed out shakily. "I know. But I have to do this."

Rafe breathed out heavily through his nose, pinching the edge of it before nodding. "Right." He said after a short pause. "I'll drive you."

The boy was already reaching for the keys to his bike when Annabelle stopped him with a hand on his chest. "I want to walk. I need to clear my head."

Rafe's eyes darted to hers, his gaze hardening for a moment. He swallowed hard, suppressing the lump of words that wanted to refuse her to go before breathing out again. He placed his hands on either side of her face, tilting his head down to let his face hover just above hers. "Okay." he breathed, his breath warm against her face. He pressed his lips against hers, hard as if attempting to imprint the feel of them onto her lips. "Call me when you're done. I've got a surprise for you." He said once he pulled away.

The girl smiled up at him and nodded, pressing a kiss on his lips before disappearing out of the room.

•❃°•°❀°•°❃•

The girl had her arms tightly wrapped around herself despite the heat that lingered in the nights air. Her heart thudded like a war drum as if walking toward the chataue was like marching into a battle field.

But her pace slowed down as she got closer. Something was off. If it wasn't the eerieness in the air it was the many hanging string lights, stretching from tree to tree to the roof of the chateau. Red, yellow, blue and green lights slithered around every thick branch of the oaks around the area and it looked almost heavenly.

"Hello?" She called out weakly, following the whirring noises that came from the backyard. As she rounded the house her eyes fell upon the chaos of colors and lights. In the middle of everything sat JJ, relaxed and calm in a hot tub with a champagne bottle in his hand and a disco ball hanging over his head. Wine glasses were scattered around him along with ridiculous inflatable palm trees.

The girl slowed down in her steps, her eyes never leaving JJ. The boy took a moment to realize that she was there and when he did he lowered his sunglasses as if to make sure he was seeing right.

"JJ-" She huffed.

"What the hell are you doing here?" He muttered, his slurred words doing nothing to hide how intoxicated he was.

Annabelle's heart clenched. "JJ, what is this?"

"You should be used to this since you're all kook now," He chugged down what was left in his bottle.

"JJ," She repeated, her voice sharper now. "How much did this cost?"

"Well," He sighed. "With the generator, the petrol, and oh, hey, express delivery... pretty much all of it."

Annabelle's breath caught in her throat and she dropped her hands to her sides. "All of it?"

The boy simply shrugged. "I had a bad day."

"You had a bad day," She sighed, shaking her head.

JJ's features tightened. "Don't give me that shit."

"What shit, JJ?" She stepped closer.

"You! Acting like you're so much better than everyone else, like everything I do is wrong or a mistake." He glared at her, the euphoria from whatever he had been drinking transforming into rage with a hint of... hatred.

The girl's shoulders slumped and she swallowed hard, trying to push past the lump in her throat that restricted her from saying what she wanted to say. "That's.. that's not true." She exhaled. "But this, JJ, really?"

"Well, Annabelle." He stumbled over his words as he spoke. "I haven't even shown you the best part..." As he pressed a button on the side of the hot tub, lights in different colors flashed from the disco ball and the insides of the hot tub as well as water jets," Disco mode!" He flashed her a grin, leaning back with his arms stretched out.

"Are you kidding me?" Annabelle's face hardened. "You could've payed for your restitution."

"Well, I didn't-" JJ suddenly flew out of his seat, his upper body coming up from the water. Annabelle flinched back at his sudden move but froze instantly as her eyes attached to the bruises that marbled his torso, dark and large, stretching up his sides. The sight made her heart sink, her lips parting as the last huff of air left her lungs.

Her eyes widened, the fibers of her heart crumbling inside her chest as she stared at his injured body. She blinked as the familiar stinging of tears crawled up into her vision seeing the pain etched to his skin.

"I didn't!" He repeated, his voice breaking slightly at the edges. "I got a hot tub! For my friends."

Annabelle swallowed hard, her chest constricting tightly. She bit back the million things she wanted to tell him, knowing that no amout of words, apologies or comforting could heal him in that moment.

"JJ-" She breathed out, a single tear rolling down her cheek which didnt go unnoticed by him.

"No, you stop being emotional. It's fine, okay?" He said, but the quivering in his voice and the gloss that casted itself over his eyes betrayed his words. The boy inhaled ragged and hollow breaths as if not being able to fully fill his lungs and his gaze dropped down to the hot tub. "I mean, it's sweet right? Everything-"

The moment he looked down Annabelle stepped forward and climbed into the hot tub, the hot water resting at her knees. She didn't hesitate to wrap her arms around the boy and the moment she did, he crashed into the embrace sobbing. His head fell to her shoulder, trying to muffle his cries against her skin as his arms weakly encircled her waist.

She held him closely, allowing him to crumble in her arms. "I've got you," She murmured, feeling his weight against her, unsteady from the alcohol coursing through him.

"I can't take him anymore!" He gasped out sobs and Annabelle instinctively held him tighter, holding back the tears that threatened to spill seeing his pain.

"I know," She whispered, her voice croaky. She knew he was talking about Luke. That drunk who JJ was forced to call a father. It wasn't the first time she had held him like this after Luke got violent. She had held him through times when he didnt know he needed holding and he had done the same for her.

She bit her bottom lip to hold back the blur in her eyes, forcing herself to stay composed for JJ. Her hand slid up to the back of his head, her other caressing his shoulder gently.

"I was gonna kill him," JJ rasped out.

Annabelle held him tightly, pressing her face into the crook of his neck, doing everything to provide as much comfort and support for his swaying frame. Her jaw tensed, trying lay her focus on JJ but the truth was that only one thing occupied her mind - how much she hated Luke and how far she'd go to make sure he never hurt him again.

A cold nigh breeze brushed past them and Annabelle could feel the boy trembling in her arms. "Come on, let's get you inside." She whispered and JJ sniffled in response. She placed her hand on his arms, carefully guiding him out of the hot tub. The boy stumbled a little as she lead him inside, the effect of hours of drinking.

Annabelle assisted him up the porch and inside, carefully sitting him down on the couch. She hurried to get him a towel and wrapped it over his shoulders before sinking down beside him as her hands caressed up and down his arms hoping to warm him just a little. Her thumb traced small circles on his arm through the fabric of the towel.

JJ's eyes flickered up to meet hers at her touch and she offered him a soft smile but the boy's features remained tight. "You don't have to babysit me," he muttered. "I'm not exactly fun company tonight."

"I'm not here for fun," She spoke softly. "I'm here for you. Just like you have with me so many times."

JJ's eyes left hers, dropping to the floor as a small scoff left his lips. "That just seems like a fucking mistake now."

Annabelle blinked, stunned by his words. She let out a breath, her eyes raking his face. "JJ-"

The boy scooted back just slightly, shaking his head. "Don't do that."

"Do what?" She asked in a low voice.

His eyes shot up to meet hers. His gaze piercing as the muscles along his jaw tensed. "Pretend like you care."

Her brows pulled together and she turned to him fully. "I do," She said, her voice sincere and heavy. "JJ, I dont know why you would ever think I don't. I'm your best friend, that's-"

"Best friend?" He sat up straight again, his voice dripping with something raw. "Annabelle, best friends don't kiss each other."

The girl blinked, her voice caught in her throat, words halted mid-sentence. Suddenly, guilt was stabbing at her again.

"That night," JJ continued, voice quieter now, like he wasn't even talking to her anymore, just letting the truth bleed out. "You kissed me. Don't tell me that didn't mean anything."

She was choking on her own words. Her own desperate attempts to redeem how she had acted after that. How she had pretended like nothing happened and only two days later kissed Rafe and moved on. Moved on without even telling JJ what there was to move on from. There was nothing that justified the way she treated JJ, just the painfully lingering love that she had for Rafe. The love she couldnt seem to get rid off.

Her heart pounded in her chest. "JJ, that night—"

He shook his head instantly. "Don't say it was a mistake. Since it happened, I've been waiting for you to say that, but if you do, I swear to God..."

His words trailed off, the threat left unfinished—not because he didn't mean it, but because he couldn't even bear to hear it out loud.

Annabelle swallowed hard, her chest aching with everything that was left unsaid between them. "It wasn't a mistake.." She breathed, her voice dripping with the guilt of everything. "It wasn't nothing."

"It clearly wasn't enough." He muttered and met her gaze. His jaw ticked seeing the hurt in her eyes, like he was the one who had screwed her over. "Don't you get it? You kissed me and I though, finally, something good happening for me. But then you don't talk to me. You disappear from us and now... Now I find out that all this time you've not only been sleeping with Rafe Fucking Cameron but you've also been living with him. Do you know how fuck up that is?"

Annabelle bit the inside of her lip, clawing her tears back. She drew shaky and ragged breaths, her hands clutching to fists in her lap, her finger nails digging into her palms. "I didn't mean to hurt you," she whispered.

JJ's face scrunched up at her, scoffing out dryly. "Well, you fucking did."

Annabelle's fists tightened and she shakily breathed in. "I know.." She whispered. "And I'll never forgive myself for that-"

"The worst part of it," JJ cut her off, like he didn't even hear her talking. "I still love you,"

He met her gaze and she felt her skin involuntary prickle. And then, without warning, JJ leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers. It wasn't calculated or smooth—just a desperate, broken kiss. His hand found her cheek like he was afraid she might vanish if he didn't hold her there. For a second, just a second, Annabelle froze. His lips tasted like salt and whiskey, something that made her muscles momentarily paralyzed. The boy inhaled deeply as if trying to savor the feeling.

But then she pulled back, gently but firmly, her hands resting on his chest to stop him from coming any closer. His chest heaved under her palm and his breath hitched. Not in confusing but just pure hurt, as if something had just shattered under her touch.

"JJ..." she said softly, her breath mingling with his. "I can't."

The boy's eyes fell shut for a moment, as if trying to keep himself together. "It's fine," he muttered, standing up abruptly, the towel falling from his shoulders. "Forget it."

The girl stared up at him, his back facing her. She felt like the smallest thing in the world, sitting there with the guilt crushing her from inside. "JJ.. I'm sorry but I can't. I'm with Rafe.

The boy spun around, his face twisted in a storm of hurt and anger. "That's right. You're with him." He scoffed. "So go. You chose him."

The girl shot up, staring at him with only the coffee table to distance them but it felt like the furthest distance in the world. Like she had never been further away from her best friend. "That's not fair."

"Fair?!" He barked and the girl choked on her own breath at the raise of his tone. "You want to talk about fair?"

The girl blinked, hoping that the darkness in the room would disguise the gloss in her eyes. "I..."

"Just.. Get out." He muttered, swaying a little where he was standing. "I don't need your pity."

Annabelle stared at him, eyes pleading. The words caught in her throat as she was stuck between wanting to comfort him and not wanting to keep pushing him. She didn't know what to say. Every word that came to mind felt like it would only hurt him more.

"Go." He glared at her, a look she could have expected to see form everyone else but never from JJ. "You two deserve each other,"

Her jaw tensed as she fought back the aching burn of tears that rested behind her eyes. She breathed in shakily, her mind racing and making her almost dizzy.

"I mean, can't you see it?" He asked, his tone raised before she had any time to even try to speak again.. "He''s already changing you Annabelle. And here I was-" He scoffed, the noise lacking any humor. "-thinking that it was because of everything that you've been through lately but it's not is it? It's him."

His voice was strained, as if the words physically hurt as they crawled up this throat. "I mean, the lying, the drugs, the breakdowns, how you're acting..." As he took a unsteady step closer, Annabelle could see the glistering of tears, resting at his waterline. "I don't even know you anymore."

His words sliced through the thread that was holding her together, leaving her to crumble but not in the way that was visible. In the way that shattered whatever sanity or emotions she had left, that broke everything inside her and left her a aching shell of nothing. She huffed out a broken breath.

"Now, leave." his words were almost a threat and she swallowed hard.

"I won't leave you-"

"Go!" he shouted making her flinch back. She stared mindlessly at him, before exhaling deeply, the sound hollow.

"I'm not leaving you because I don't care." She breathed. "I'm leaving because I love you too much to stay here and listen to you hurting."

The boy's expression didn't flinch or even move and the girl hurried out, desperate for fresh air. Desperate for air that she couldnt find in that room, suffocating with guilt and the thing that pained her the most. The undeniable love.

𝟑𝟐𝟖𝟐 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬
┗━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┛

𝐀/𝐍
sorry for the wait but I have a lot in school plus work on top of that so I might have some irregular and uneven updates until summer at least

but yeah... Annabelle and JJ are making me wanna slide down my wall sobbing.