❛ SURVIVOR'S HEART ! ❜
chapter twenty ―― i don't leave people

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ IT FELT LIKE IT HAD BEEN FOREVER. Charlie had tears in her eyes but she kept the back of her hand – the hand that was injured – pressed to her mouth to keep herself from making a noise. She could no longer make out the sounds around her, she wasn't sure if the walkers were gone or not, but she refused to move. Her head had begun to pound as she squeezed her eyes closed. Then she jumped when the tarp was pulled back, swinging her arm out a little as she squinted against the sun.

"Damn, princess." Daryl huffed upon seeing the state the brunette was in and she let her arm fall when she heard his voice. "Charlie? Hey, you alright?"

"Can't. . . breathe." She shook as he sat her up before lifting himself into the bed of the truck. He squatted down beside her, his blue eyes concerned as she reached for him.

"Charlie?" Mason rushed over, stopping when he saw the way she shook, even as her hands fisted around Daryl's vest. "Hey, hey, hey. You're okay." He rushed over and let the tailgate down before he lifted himself up into the bed with the other two. "Charlie." But she didn't pull away from the man in front of her.

"Said she can't breathe." Daryl told him, holding her to him because he wasn't sure what else to do or how to help her.

"She has panic attacks." Mason told him. "Uh, get her to count to ten."

"Me?"

"Can you not count that high?" He mumbled. "Just do it." Mason told him and he nodded. "I'm gonna get Shane." He jumped down and went off to find the oldest Walsh as Daryl looked down at Charlie – he wasn't sure what to do or how to get her to count to ten.

"Hey, princess, I need you to count." He spoke and she nodded, not lifting her head from his chest. "One."

"One." She repeated, her eyes closed, her fists still gripping his vest.

"Two."

"Two." She took a breath. "Three. Four." Another breath. "Five. Six. Seven." She took another breath but it was less shaky. "Eight. Nine. Ten." She relaxed against him, her hands shaking slightly but she had visibly calmed down. "Thank you." She breathed out and he patted her back a little.

"Course." He told her, his voice gruff. "Let's get you down." He pulled back and she let her hands fall from him.

"Wait." She stopped him. "T-The tool box." His brows creased as he looked over at the metal box. Then he pushed himself to his feet and moved across the truck bed, bending over to dig through the arsenal. He looked from the weapons to her, her eyes were red and she had tear stains on her cheeks and her smile wasn't as wide as he had seen it get. He could tell it was still taking a toll on her.

"Charlie, what happened?" Shane asked as she rushed towards them.

"I'm fine." She told him, holding her hand out to Daryl and he pulled her to her feet. "Had a small panic attack."

"I thought-"

"Small spaces." She mumbled. "I'm fine now." She shrugged. "But, uh, I found these." She bent over and pulled out two hunting rifles before putting them back. "And there's some knives. Got some bullets, too."

"Alright, you go sit down somewhere, take a breather, and we'll get these." Shane told her and she nodded, reaching for her bag but Daryl picked it up before she could, then he jumped down and waved her forward but before she could jump down, he grabbed her waist and lifted her off the tailgate, putting her on her feet as Shane and Mason climbed into the bed of the truck to get the weapons she had found – two Smith and Wesson hunting rifles, a few assorted hunting knives, and three green, metal boxes filled with ammo.

"I'm fine, Daryl."

"Just making sure." He told her and she smiled up at him, nudging him with her elbow.

"I appreciate it." She hummed. "Can you hand me a water out of my bag?" She asked and he swung the bag around so he could dig through it, he stopped and looked up at the girl as he pulled out the knife she had been playing with before. "That's my That's not a knife, that's a knife knife." She told him, using her best Australian accent – it wasn't that great.

"Alright, Dundee." He chuckled as he put the knife back and handed her a bottle of water – she wished it was cold but any water was a luxury. She smiled a little, glad he had gotten her reference to one of her favorite movies. "How'd you find all this?"

"I, uh, was looking for tools, thought they'd be useful eventually, when I found that stash. Gotta love rednecks." She mumbled the last part mostly to herself as she twisted off the top and raised the bottle to her lips and he chuckled a little.

"Let's get these back to the rv, wait for Rick and Sophia." Shane said as she walked by them, Mason followed after him.

"Where are Rick and Sophia?" The brunette asked, her eyebrows pinched as she looked over at her brother.

"Sophia got chased into the woods by a couple of walkers and Rick went after her." Mason told her and her face paled slightly. "They'll make it back." He nudged her with his elbow and she nodded as she and Daryl grabbed the few knives they had left on the tailgate then they joined the others by the rv.

"What's all this?" Dale asked, looking over at them – Shane had the two rifles hanging from his shoulder and a few knives in one hand while Mason carried the ammo boxes.

"Charlie found the mother load." Mason told him before taking the ammo he held to his truck. He sat them in the back floorboard while Charlie pulled her knife collection out of the glove box.

"I may need a bigger box." The girl mumbled as she put the knives she held in the seat next to the box of pocket knives she had been collecting since she was ten. "Oh, and I found this." She fished the small pocket knife from her pocket and added it to her collection.

"Hey." Mason nudged her a little once they were alone, his voice low so the other didn't hear. "What brought it on?"

"I was under the tarp, couldn't see anything, I didn't see you before the walkers came through. And I. . . it all just added up. It was dark, I couldn't see, I could barely hear anything. The walkers kept hitting the truck, it was getting harder to breathe. I couldn't stop it. When Daryl pulled the tarp back, I thought it was a walker."

"It's okay." He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "You're okay now." He kissed the top of her head and she nodded as Rick made his way up to the road . . . without Sophia.

>>>>> • <<<<<

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ WHILE RICK, SHANE, GLENN and Daryl went out to look for Sophia, Charlie and Mason got Carl to help them dig through a few more cars. It was better than just sitting around and waiting and they had managed to find a decent amount of food, water and blankets. Charlie walked over to an old, orange mustang. The car was nice aside from the dust, and she heaved the door open and slid into the seat, checking the glove box and the floorboard for anything. When she didn't find anything, she popped the trunk and made her way to the back of the car. She found a suitcase and she opened it, smiling as she pulled out a pair of converse – they were her size, she put them to the side and dug through the suitcase. She found a few shirts and even some shorts, she put the shoes back and closed it up before pulling it out of the truck and dragging it behind her as she made her way back to the rv. She added the food and water she had found to the pile they had collected then she took the suitcase and hauled it into the back of Mason's truck.

"What's with the suitcase?" Josh asked, his hands in his pockets.

"Clothes." She answered. "May need some eventually."

"Makes sense." He nodded and she turned to walk away from him but he grabbed her elbow to stop her. "Why are you avoiding me?"

"Because it's easier."

"Then what?"

"I feel awful, okay." She huffed. "I'm not a one-night stand kind of person. I was really drunk-"

"So was I."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"You're not. Well, it sucks that you're avoiding me. And it's not fun when you're always yelling at me."

"I'm sorry. It's just. . . the last couple of days have been hectic."

"I get it." He nodded. "Can you stop avoiding me now?"

She chuckled a little, pushing her hair out of her face. "Yeah. I'll stop avoiding you."

"Good, cause Mason is driving me insane. He keeps singing the same two songs over and over again, and he can't sing." He told her, his voice low so the boy they were talking about couldn't hear, and she laughed. It was true, Mason couldn't carry a tune and he only really knew two songs by memory. "So, you gonna join us in the truck?"

"I don't think so." She shook her head, giving him a small smile. "I'm gonna stick with Daryl. Been a little extra sensitive to small, enclosed spaces lately."

"Okay." He nodded. "Just don't start avoiding me again."

>>>>> • <<<<<

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ CHARLIE HAD A FEW people with her as they scavenged through cars again, she couldn't sit and wait and she figured it was best to find what they could since they had time. She jumped out of a gray pickup, a smile on her face with a small pistol crossbow in one hand and a sheath with a few arrows in the other – she had found it tucked under the seat in a box.

"What'd you guys find?" She asked, making her way over to the car Mason and Carl dug through.

"Flashlights, batteries, few things of canned food." Mason told her.

"I found some sleeping bags." Carl added, pulling them out of the car, all three were rolled up.

"That's good." He patted his head. "Winter's not too far off."

"Any word on Sophia?" The little boy asked, looking up at her and she sighed as she squatted down, laying her new found weapon on the pavement.

"Shane said Daryl and your dad are still looking." She told him. "That's all I got at the moment, sorry, kiddo."

"That's okay." He gave her a small smile. "I'm gonna take this to the truck."

"Okay." She nodded, patting his back and he walked away, the sleeping bags in his arms. She sighed as she stood up, leaning down to pick up the pistol crossbow.

"Whatcha got there?" Mason asked as she situated his bag on his back.

"Tiny crossbow." She grinned as she held it up. "May be easier to learn how to use than a regular bow."

"Ture." He hummed, then he looked around. "Let's hit a few more cars, see if we can find some medical supplies. Think that's the only thing we haven't found. And if we don't keep that hand of yours clean, it may get infected."

"I'm more worried about T." She told him and they separated, never getting too far from each other as they dug through cars collecting what they could.

They met back at the truck, the tailgate down and they dumped out their bags and started sorting through it – they separated out the food and the water from the few band aids and first aid kits they had managed to find, it wasn't a lot but it was a start. There were a few gauze and tape, she grabbed them then made her way over to T-Dog. He let her wrap his arm up, but it was clear that he felt awful.

>>>>> • <<<<<

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ "YOU TALKIN' TO ME NOW?" Shane asked as Charlie leaned against the car he was loading up.

"Why are you being a dick to Carl?" She crossed her arms over her chest as she looked over at him. "That kid loves you, he looks up to you."

"Yeah, well, he's gonna have to get over it." He muttered.

"You're a dick." She huffed as she pushed herself off the car and turned towards him. "Why are you fixing this thing up anyways?"

"I'm leaving." He told her. "And I want you to come with me."

"What?" Her brows creased and she let her arms fall to her sides. "You wanna leave?"

"Yeah." He nodded, stopping to look at her over the car door that was between them. "I can't be here and I want you with me."

"I'm not leaving the group." She shook her head. "I don't leave people."

"I'm your brother."

"Then you know that what you're asking me to do is never gonna happen." She told him, tears in her eyes. "Mason's here. Carl's here. I'm not going anywhere."

"Okay." He nodded, but she could tell that he was pissed as he went back to loading stuff into the car and she turned away from him. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand as she made her way over to Mason's truck. She lifted herself into the bed and sat down, pulling her legs under her as she arranged the six huge water bottles – the jugs Shane had found – and the rest of the stuff they had collected.

NOVA SPEAKS !

it feels so good to be writing again!
i have missed it and i'm excited to be back.
i miss all of you and my characters!!

i will slowly be getting back to all of my books
and i have posted a book of my drafts because i'm having a hard time figuring out what i want to work on and if you would, can you please give it a look and let me know which book/books you are interested in!! i'm hoping it will give me a motivational boost that can help me write!