hey!

before you guys panic, i am writing season 4. 

this random update isn't supposed to scare you guys (as someone who literally tweaks anytime she sees a title like this in a book). i actually just wanted to come on here and kinda talk

so i haven't updated in a hot second, and while it's usual for me to go on random breaks, i am sorry. obviously, i'm finished with s3 and it's not wrong to assume that this is just me plotting for s4 but if i'm being honest, i've done barely any thinking about s4. i haven't pre-written, let alone touched this book since i published the final chapter. 

for some i might be dramatic for acting this way, but as someone who's been consistently writing for this book since january of '23, not writing is something big. 

as known, s3 is my least favorite season for a multitude of reasons, so getting through this act has been enough work as it is. however, the ending of season 4 coming out right in the middle of this surely didn't help.

i'm not being dramatic when i say the ending of s4 genuinely killed my spark for writing this book. yes, i've had some fun moments writing chapters but starting with 74, i just haven't had as much fun writing for ss like i used to. every time i tried to write, especially scenes with jj, i honestly just started to ask myself what was the point? why put effort if i'm gonna have to write that ending. 

all the drama with the cast didn't help at all. watching the obx cast fall out in real time has actually been a nightmare. 

s4 just showed in so many ways that this silly little show isn't what it used to be anymore, and i know i'm not the only writer who was disappointed with what they were given to work with. this obx is certainly not the obx we all started to write fanfics for. 

yes, it's okay to mature characters and relationships as a show runs and grows but honestly the pates have fucked over each character personality and relationship wise it just blows my mind that they wrote the characters. (honestly, the cast drama is beyond me atp it's just the way that the writers and team handled all of it). 

yes, i will be writing s4. at the end of the day, obx is still one of my favorite shows and this book is still one of my prized possessions. eden bexley is one of my favorite ocs to write for, and i can't leave this book hanging by any means (especially bc i wrote by s3 ending to fit s4's e1 choppy style). i also enjoyed the first half and would be so refreshed to write s1 style chapters.

s4 is happening.

with that being said though, i have 2 things:

1). i am keeping the s4 ending the same.

do i want to write the finale? no. i've never bawled harder over a scene, and the last thing i want to do is give my sweet boy that ending in my own work, let alone have to write eden into all of it bc let me tell you now it's not going to be pretty. she'll freaking grieve. 

but, i am someone who hates going off cannon when i write, and honestly, i avoid it if i can. this is eden's book but it is still the obx plot and other than adding isla in, i've kept the plot relatively the same. i really don't plan on changing the plot now. 

so, i have to give the pates an ounce of faith that somehow jj's ending isn't entirely pointless and that it'll be relevant to s5. especially right now, when they've just now started filming for s5 and there's no real details. i have to keep the ending the same. 

since eden isn't his love interest (jjeden stans, it's time to retire), re-writing wouldn't do anything for her character other than spare her grief, so honestly, there is no other reason for me to waste my time re-writing. i don't want to make a choice i'll regret, and in no ways am i creative enough to re-write and add his character into s5. a ton of you are gonna re-write and that's amazing but it would drain me more to do that than to just keep the ending as it is and suffer.

i do have plans for his ending that include more eden, so i can at least give that scene some more justice. 

will i change my mind? maybe if there's any news about s5, but honestly, i don't think so. sorry to anyone who's upset.

2). i'm not rushing into writing for s4

as i said, act 3 slowly got less and less exciting to write for many different reasons. by the time i was finally writing the final chapter, i was doing it out of obligation rather than real motivation. i was finishing so i could leave this book on a finished note for the time being.

i've been consistently updating this book for the last 3 years, and it's honestly just left me burnt out? in between the last few chapters for this book, i took breaks and realized it was okay not to write. maybe even better. because, honestly, i don't like to publish chapters that i didn't have fun writing, and i don't think it's fair for you guys to have to read them.

that being said, i'm for sure taking a break before writing for s4. 

it's been nice to not feel pressured into writing for this book, and in the small break i've taken, i've also found time to write for some other fandoms (the hunger games, cobra kai, re-writing my stranger things fic, etc). i've been able to just kinda write whatever instead of being entirely focused on one book. 

i need to let my motivation for ss grow back, and honestly, i still have no clue how i even want to write episode one so i have to figure all that out away.

i'll try my best to write when i can, but with my little motivation, no promises. again, this is not me stopping this book, more so putting it to the side for a while. 

i love all ya'll so much. feel free to ask questions how i'll be writing s4 if you have any :) i'll be back soon TRUST