♡ ₊˚.༄

𝐒𝐇𝐄 ── ◦'𖥸'◦ ── 𝒮ℋℰ
𝖺𝗆𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗅𝖺 𝗃𝗈𝗇𝖾𝗌 𝗑 𝗍𝗈𝗆 𝗁𝗈𝗅𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽
𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝟵𝟳 ╱ ╱ ☁️🤍 ˚◞♡

─────── ❛ 閉鎖 ❜ ───────

〘 视频对话 〙
𝐌𝐎𝐕𝐈𝐄ㅤㅤㅤㅤ𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑
𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃ㅤ 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄ㅤ𝐓𝐎
𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄ㅤㅤ ㅤㅤ !
𐃆ི𖥾 𖧷𖥣𖡼𖥧 𖠣

𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗇𝖾𝖼𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀. . .

❨⠀dominic ─ tom ─ nikki ─ paddy ─ sam ─ harry⠀❩

"how was it?" tom breathes the second the call connects.

dominic raises his brows. "hello to you too, speedy," he replies, glancing at nikki.

"how is she?" tom asks, noticing his mum appearing in the frame. "mum, how's amandla?"

nikki looks at the camera and sighs. "it was rough. right now, she's asleep. we're at the dolan's house, we'll be staying a night and flying back tomorrow night."

at her reply, paddy pokes his head into the frame, his face taking up more than half the screen. "can you tell andie that i'm sorry for her and the dolan's loss and i miss her?" he pleads, grabbing the phone from his older brother.

"paddy, give it back!" tom calls.

dominic and nikki share small smiles. "we will."

suddenly, sam's head pops in as he takes the phone from paddy, ignoring his protests. "how are her and ethan? given they're broken up, i'd imagine things have been tense." he commented.

"hey! i was going to ask that!" harry shouts in the background. sam carelessly flips him off.

shaking her head, nikki takes the phone from her husband as he heads to the bathroom to take a shower. "things haven't been tense at all," the ginger-haired woman responds. all of her sons went quiet at her words.

"what do you mean?" tom questions, snatching his phone back and his face came back into view.

nikki sighs and gives him a pointed look. "i don't know if they're back together," she states.

"i-i wasn't going to ask—"

"yes, you were." she cuts him off, and the actor shut his mouth. "they don't talk a lot, but i suppose that's due to everything that's happened. they're glued at the hip though. it's the same with grayson and cameron. she's extremely close to everyone."

tom nods, sighing. his mum wasn't going to tell him anything else, he knew that. he'd just have to wait until amandla came home. "how's val?" he finally asks.

"quiet also. neither ri nor amandla have spoken really since the funeral. they're having to experience this again after only a year. it's a lot to process. your father and i are just doing our best to be here for them and provide emotional support." she frowns.

harry appears next to tom. "have you guys talked to ethan since you've been there?" a genuinely curious expression was written across his face. he was intrigued to know how it went meeting the youtuber.

nikki nods. "yes. we met at the funeral and talked a bit before and after the service. he's very kind and humble. i can see why amandla likes him so much."

tom's face drops and harry covers his mouth. sam could be heard chuckling. "thank you, mother. that doesn't make me feel awkward or anything at all," her eldest grumbles.

she laughs gently. "it's the truth. grayson and cameron are equally as kind and humble. it's been quite nice to finally meet lisa's children. you lot would like them."

paddy jumps in. "andie's shown me pictures of them. they have good genes," he remarks, and the twins bust out laughing. lowering his head, tom sighs heavily.

holding back her own laughter, nikki simply nods. "i'll be sure to tell them that."

𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝖽𝖺𝗒!
実生活 // 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞

     IT WAS THE NEXT NIGHT AND ETHAN DOLAN HAD JUST PULLED ON HIS SWEATS WHEN THE DOOR TO THE BATHROOM OPENED. Looking up as he grabbed the towel that sat on the sink, he saw through the mirror that Amandla had entered. She leaned against the doorframe and crossed her arms. Sighing, he rubbed the towel against his hair, attempting to dry it a little more.

     "What's up?" he asked, already knowing why she was there.

     Amandla gave him a knowing look. "Gray's downstairs with everyone else watching some home movies. Nik and Dom just left. I figured this would be the best chance for us to talk where we wouldn't be overheard or interrupted."

     Lowering the towel, he turned around and hung it over one of the glass shower walls. "All right, then talk," he replied coldly, walking back over to the sink.

     Scoffing, the brown-haired girl uncrossed her arms. "Me? All I've done is talk to you, Ethan, and every time you shut me down. You refuse to talk, yet want me to be your emotional support person at any and all times. Make it make sense," she snapped, growing frustrated. "You broke up with me. I don't know why you're acting as if it was the other way around."

     "Because it basically was," he exclaimed, half-laughing in exhaustion. Her brows rose. "The moment you moved to the UK, I lost you. We both know it."

     "Actually, no," she replied, walking forward. "The moment you lost me was when you said you didn't trust me. Not when I moved to the UK; it was then. And the moment our relationship ended was when you called me out for how I look at Tom. He was the first person I ever fell for, of course, I'm going to look at him differently! And yes, the romantic feelings I had for Tom came back, but why do you think that was? He just told me that everything I believed for that past year and a half was a lie! Everything came flooding back and I should have told you. That's on me and I'm genuinely so sorry, but my feelings for you—how I feel about you—never changed. Not once. I was just as in love with you as I ever was.

     "And the fact that you didn't and don't believe me reflects that lack of trust you have in me. I love you, Ethan. I didn't want our relationship to end. I chose you over Tom! Despite how I felt, I chose you because even though I love Tom, I also love you. You were the one I decided I wanted to spend forever with. You were the person I'd grown with. I wanted us to be able to work through this, but it wasn't mutual. You let your insecurities concerning Tom get the best of you and ended things rather than fighting. You decided not to trust me after I truly hadn't done anything to warrant your mistrust. If you want me to talk, then fine. I'll talk.

     "I'm currently trying to figure things out with Tom, but I haven't been able to because I still love you. I am still in love with you and haven't been able to fully move on. It's why I can't tell Tom that I'm in love with him the way he is with me because I'm not. At least not in the way that I am with you. What I have with him goes deeper than love, but it doesn't change how I feel about you. It never has and I just wish your stubborn ass would fucking realize that. I'm tired of having to repeat myself and feel as if I'm talking to a brick wall! You're listening but you're not hearing me!

     "For one second, can you abandon your premeditated beliefs about Tom and I and just hear me? Stop acting like an ass just because I'm trying to talk to you. All I'm asking for is this: hear me. Please." Amandla gasped, her eyes glossing over with tears as her voice died down.

     Inhaling sharply, Ethan briefly held his breath. "I hear you," he finally said, leaning against the counter.

     Blinking, a tear trailed down her cheek and she quickly wiped it away. "Do you?" she challenged, her voice cracking. "Because I am tired, Ethan. I am tired of explaining myself to you."

     He nodded. "I made a mistake," he admitted, glancing down at the floor. "And it was a stupid one. I didn't realize it until it was too late. The damage had already been done; we were over. I let my insecurities and ego get in the way of us. I didn't and don't deserve you. You deserve better."

     "I don't care! I wanted you!" Amandla asserted; her voice echoing off the bathroom walls. "I wanted you," she choked out, looking away as more tears fell. "You were all I wanted, Ethan. That's it. I was all in. It wasn't until Tom came back that things changed, but it didn't change my mind. I wanted you."

     Their eyes met and Ethan pushed down the lump in his throat. The guilt living in his heart was eating him up and he just wished that he could rewind time—take back everything. "I never should have doubted you and us. I should have trusted you from the start, but I didn't and I'm so sorry. I think I was always scared of Tom coming back. He was the first person you loved and he was a movie star; he was older and I'm just a kid from Jersey who makes videos with his twin brother for fun. I felt like I could never compete with that or him.

     "If he came back, who would you choose? A movie star or me? And I know that's my insecurities talking, but it didn't change how I felt. I let that part of me take over and get in the way. I should have talked it out with you and lowered my walls, but I didn't and I'm so sorry. You were right: I was only listening. I wasn't hearing you because I didn't want to. I didn't want to admit I was wrong and that was my ego getting in the way." Ethan acknowledged, a heavy breath leaving him.

     Sniffing, Amandla nodded, licking her lips as she brushed away more tears. "If you had just asked me to choose between you two, you would know that I would have chosen you."

     Noticing the words would have, he frowned. "You wouldn't choose me now, though," he pointed out.

     "No, I wouldn't." Amandla shook her head. "But that doesn't mean that I'm not still in love with you. It just means that I've realized that I was trying to hold onto something that had ended weeks ago because I was scared of having to see Tom and finally confront everything I'd suppressed for over a year. I didn't want to have to face that heartache and pain, but I did. I faced my fear and now I'm trying to figure things out with you. I've been trying to figure things out with you ever since I saw you at the hospital."

     Tears glistened in the YouTuber's eyes as he forced himself to break eye contact. "I'm sorry about yesterday. I'm sorry for pushing you away. I'm so sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for ending things and I'm so, so sorry about all of this. I just," his voice broke off and he inhaled sharply. "I screwed up really badly and would do anything to take it back, but I know that I can't. I don't know where to go from here because I don't want to lose you—romantically or platonically."

     Nodding, the brown-haired girl sniffed. "Thank you. I don't want to lose you either." Their eyes locked. "And I don't know where to go from here either," she confessed, throwing her arms out to her sides.

     "Where do you want things to go with... Tom?" Ethan asked, forcing the actor's name out of his mouth.

     Where did she want things to go? Amandla furrowed her brows and swept her gaze to the ground. "I'm not sure, but I know that I need him in my life. I know that I love him and am slowly starting to fall again, but I haven't let go of you. We broke up over the phone, E. That's a shitty way to end a relationship and I think we both need closure." Her eyes had once again locked with his and he frowned.

     "When do you leave?" he randomly questioned, and she tilted her head, puzzled.

     "I-I don't know. I haven't booked a flight yet, I was sort of playing this by ear. When I leave depends on how this conversation goes," she breathed.

     Ethan bit the inside of his cheek. "Can I propose an idea?" he asked, and she nodded. "For the next few days, can we go back to how things were?"

     "You mean when we were together?" she checked, shifting her footing.

     "Yeah," he muttered, and Amandla crossed her arms, brows scrunching in thought. "I just want to be able to do everything with you one last time, you know? The last time we were together, we didn't know that the next time we saw each other it would be as individuals, not a couple. This time, we know it's the last. I don't know, I thought that it could bring things to a collective end. We could do or say whatever else we need to and when you leave, we go back to being... just friends. It's up to you; you don't have to say yes. I don't have any expectations."

     Did she want to do everything one last time? Her answer was yes, she did. She wanted to feel everything—be with him for the last time. She wanted to keep talking things out. The next few days could bring the closure both of them needed. Then, when she left, it was over.

     "Okay. Yeah. We can go back."

╰┈ ⊰ 𝒈𝒓𝒂𝒚 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒂𝒌𝒔 ❞ ⑊ ⎯⎯ : ⊱˒ ♡

⌇ 𝘯𝘰 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯⠀|⠀𝑛𝜊 𝑓𝑙𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑠⠀꒱
˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙ ˙

     hey everyone!! i hope you all enjoyed the ninety-seventh chapter!

     this is the first time i've written a proper argument in this book between amandla and another character that was in person. i really like it and being able to portray this broken and frustrated version of our best girl was fun. the chapter was originally going to be much longer, but i didn't want to draw it out further than need be, and i wanted to get straight to the point.

     btw, if anyone has any questions regarding #ethandla (r.i.p.), feel free to drop them here and i'll answer! or questions in general.

     this book is ending in less than two weeks and i'm emotional. since i edit all my chapters in real-time, right before i update, i'm willing to change or add some stuff for everyone. if there is ANYTHING YOU WANT TO SEE IN THIS BOOK BEFORE IT CONCLUDES, COMMENT IT HERE!!!

     that being said, there might be particular scenes or scenarios i can't incorporate given how this book ends. however, i will do my best to give back to all of you. i'm so grateful for all the love and support on this story and want to share some of that appreciation. <3

     𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐋𝐘 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑: thank you all for taking the time out of your days to comment on this story. it means a lot and helps the story be spread to a wider audience &&& gives me the opportunity to grow as an author. all i ask is that people vote on each chapter, please. as a creator, it takes time to write and develop stories. especially social media-based ones because there's so much to take into consideration and the amount of time i've dedicated to finding graphics, screenshotting everything kelsey simone (and other characters) posts, making graphics, etc., is ridiculous. so please, vote on every chapter. it means a lot more than i could ever express.

     don't forget to vote & comment!