🍒·˚ ༘ ┊͙CHAPTER 008 !  ˊˎ
karma is my boyfriend
( real life, imessage )

༄✧ *:･3RD PERSON
chris and estella drove in silence to a small cafe that the two frequent. dark green walks with small yellow lights and fake fireflies sprinkled across the ceiling. it was still early, and chris was grateful there were people there, it would make it easier, and less possibility of a scene.

awkward silence lingered between the two. both knew what was going to happen. the anticipation had finally built up, distance and miscommunications from both ends had finally taken a tole on them.

they sat in a small booth, in the corner, soft music playing as chris glanced up at her. she did her best to keep her composure, she wouldn't be seen crying over him. she didn't want to.

"is this about vivienne." estella finally asked, breaking the silence. "what?" chris asked, although it came out guiltier than he expected it to

"ever since that day at the cafe you've been off, you're always deep in thought. which is already unusual for you.. is it about her? that's all i want to know" estella was civil. she was not going to get upset over something she anticipated to happen for a long time.

it was her karma for intruding on their relationship in the first place.

ever since her and chris first got together, they clashed. not in a way that gave them the happy ending like in the movies where fire and water find  a way to be together but in a way that resulted in arguments over petty things

who was friends with who, who followed who, what one of them wore and why they clashed outfits. why he drank pepsi more than water and why she hated red meat— stupid pointless things.

"..i miss her." chris finally admitted, and the promise that estella made to herself broke. tears swelled in her eyes as she nodded "i see.."

"i love you, stella. you have to believe i do" he grabbed her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. this was what she loved about chris, he never did allow her to doubt them.. even if it never worked

"i love you too.." she said softly, attempting to blink away tears, although more just appeared in her eyes

"thank you for being here for me, through these years, but." chris paused, he didn't even know what to say to her

"but we have to break up" estella finished the sentence, nodding her head. "yeah.."

her eyes met his "i know.." she whispered "but— thank you as well, for allowing me to be in your life. i'm sorry that it has to end like this" she continued and a small sad smile placed itself on her face

"to our last meal" chris said, softly kissing the knuckles of her hands. she was going to miss him.

"our last meal makes it sound as if we are dying chris" she laughed, fanning away her tears so they wouldn't ruin her makeup

"we aren't, but this-" he signaled between the two of them with his finger "this is dying.." he laughed softly as a waitress approached

the two spent their last meal in peace, in the dim light of the cafe, with laughs and memories.

in the end estella stood up, kissing his head as her friend pulled up outside. no more words were shared between the two of them before she went her own way, walking away the same way vivienne did when chris dumped her.

chris paid the bill, and sat in his car. he hadn't been single in a long time, especially with no one else in mind.

well, he did have someone in mind, but the thought of texting her so casually once again made him sick to his stomach. however, deep down he knew it was guilt, not fear.

he stared down at her number, switching between instagram and imessage. trying to decide the best
way to message her again.

"why the fuck am i so nervous about this? it's vivienne, the same vivienne, my vivienne" he said to himself, building his confidence while also trying to shake away the anxiety that build up in his stomach.

his eyes noticed the last messages sent to eachother, he hadn't deleted them.

viv

chris?
hey? are u okay?
i'm coming over.

that was two years ago, before she came over in the middle of the night and demanded that he tell her what was wrong

and that was before he broke up with her for no good reason. it was clear now that estella was never going to be the girl he ended up with.

he deleted the old messages, leaning his head backwards. banging it on the headrest and sighing, soft music on the radio played, and suddenly the song changed

her song. viviennes song, the melody brought a sad smile to his face.

chris was never one to believe in signs from the universe. you had to work for signs, but if he did believe in them. he would consider this one. a song about him FROM her.

somehow bringing himself to type a small message as the song continued, and  hesitating before hitting send.

viv

i know we haven't spoken in a long time
and i know you probably do not want to
hear from me, but i would really appreciate
it if we could talk in person? i'll fly out there
or anything i just. i need to see you

now he waited, driving home, nervously tapping his fingers on the steering wheel, waiting for the sound of a notification. something, anything.

he wanted to see her, no. he needed to see her again.

he needed to see the way she smiled as the first snow fell or the way she laughed every time chris fell on the ice.

he wanted to be in the crowd cheering for her the same way she cheered for him at all his lacrosse games, smiling and making posters with cheesy quotes that the two would make fun of.

a longing in his stomach arose as he remembered more and more of vivienne. like memories that you keep locked away knowing you would go back to them.

love like that doesn't go away.

she was a part of him, she was rooted into his skin.

chris stepped into his house, yawning as he placed the keys on the counter. "chris? is that you?" nick yelled

"yeah? i do live here?" chris answered sarcastically and opened the fridge, searching for something to drink, one thing about the cafe? it had gross drinks.

"great! would you happen to know the reason for a certain someone's freak out?" nick asked approaching his brother, holding up his phone revelaing a couple of messages between himself and vivienne

"she texted you?? about what!— i mean.. about what?" he asked lowering the range of his voice to seem nonchalant.

"don't act stupid, we both know about what" nick said "you asked to meet her? are you crazy?"

"i'm not crazy? is it so bad i wanna see her again?" guilt laced each word, and the eyes of his brother softened "it's not crazy, it's just weird and crazy for her, chris"

"how is it weird for her? we dated for two years and have known eachother since we were in kindergarten?" his eyebrow raised, sitting down at the kitchen table

"i know not even your that dumb chris." matt added walking in on the two of them. running his fingers through his hair

"i'm not dumb! can you guys please explain why it's so wrong? i just miss her"

"yeah, but she's done everything in her power to forget about the pain that you gave her, and now this is kinda like.. setting her back a bit" nick did his best to explain without hurting his brothers feelings— adding a joking tone in some of his words to protect chris's heart

nick knew the most out of the three of them everything vivienne had done to try and erase chris from her mind.

she wrote albums and had flings with guys older than her, but nothing would replace her first love.

maybe subconsciously she knew nick still followed her spam and was still on her private story. words may have never been spoken or shared between the two over the years that chris was with estella but they still watched over one another

he saw the pictures she posted with the british rapper and the actors. he saw the rants where she cried in the music studio as she wrote going under

"but why is it setting her back? if she misses me why can't we just go back to the way things were?" he groaned, leaning back in the chair

"chris it's not that simple—"

"yes it is, matt!" his brother sighed and lifted his hands up in the air as if guilty "fine don't take our advice" matt walked away, frustrated with his brother

matt also had his own special bond with vivienne, not like the one nick and her did. but like the sister he never had. secretly stalking her page from his secret secret spams and twitters, not wanting to break the no contact for his brothers sake.

nick looked between his brothers and nodded his head, understanding how stubborn chris was, and walked away

chris hadn't realized that vivienne had changed, grown, evolved.

that's when he finally got the answer he deserved

viv

nah. i'm good.