John B: Don't worry, I know exactly what I'm doing. Everything is going to be fine!
Pope: How can you still say that?
John B: Because sometimes, when things get tough, denial is all we have.

Kiara: But Kaia, she's like JJ.
John B: So she's an idiot.

Pope: Okay, so I've left you all a detailed set of instructions to follow while I'm away.
JJ: Mine just says "JJ, no."
Kaia: Mine also just says "no."
Pope: And I want you to apply it to every possible situation.

Caleb: Sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail.
JJ: No, it's my fault. I shouldn't have used my one phone call to prank call the police.

John B: Help! I told Sarah I'd cook dinner tonight, but I can't cook!
JJ, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

Pope: Do you take constructive criticism?
JJ: I only take cash or credit.

Kiara: EAT THE RICH.
Kaia: Kie, you literally come from a rich family.
Kiara: That's fine, I'm a snack anyway.

JJ: What goes up but never comes down?
The Pogues: The amount of stress you bring us.

JJ: What do IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean?
Kaia: I don't know, I love you, and talk to you later.
JJ: Okay, I love you too. I'll just ask Pope.

JJ: Who thinks I can fit fifteen marshmallows into my mouth?
Sarah: You're a hazard to society.
Kaia: And a coward. Do twenty.

JJ: Change is inedible.
Pope: Did you mean inevitable?
JJ, spitting out coins: No, I did not.

Kiara: What do you think JJ will do for a distraction?
Kaia: He'll probably make a noise or throw a rock. That's what I would do.
*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*
Kaia: Or he could do that.

JJ: In my defense, I was unsupervised.
Pope: Wasn't Kai with you?
Kaia: In my defense, I was also unsupervised.

JJ: My biggest talent is being stress.
Sarah: Don't you mean stressed?
JJ: No.
The Pogues, very tiredly: No.

Kiara: Being a mom is so difficult sometimes.
Kiara: I got eight hours of sleep. It took me four days though.
John B: Kie, you're talking to the wall.

John B: How is the most beautiful person in the world doing?
Sarah: I don't know, how are—
JJ, from the other side of the room: I'm doing great.

John B: If there's gonna be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back.
JJ: Of course. I can't flip this table by myself.

Kaia: What's a word that's a mix between sad and mad?
Pope: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated—
JJ: Smad.

Pope: Hey, JJ, can I get some dating advice?
JJ: Just because I'm with Kai doesn't mean I know how I did it.

Kaia: JJ, I need to talk to you about something important.
JJ: The building was already on fire when I got there.
Kaia: What?
JJ: What?

Sarah: What does "take out" mean to you?
John B: Food.
Kaia: Date.
Pope: Homicide.
JJ: All three if you're not a chicken shit.

JJ: This is the best vanilla pudding I've ever had.
Kaia, deeply concerned: That's butter, JJ...

Kiara: It's a war zone out here. What happened?
Pope: Well, JJ—
Kiara: Say no more.

Kaia: I have an empty sketchbook but I don't know what to put in it.
JJ: Put spaghetti in it.
Kaia: I'm not taking suggestions from you.
John B: Put spaghetti in it.
Kaia: I'm taking suggestions from anyone but the two of you.
Pope: Put spaghetti in it.
Kaia: I'm no longer taking suggestions.

Kaia: I need to talk to you.
JJ: Okay, but in my defense, John B bet me fifty cents that I couldn't drink all that shampoo.
Kaia: That's not—You drank shampoo for fifty cents?!
JJ: Do you think I could've gotten more?

JJ: I am the most responsible person in the group.
Pope: But you just set the kitchen on fire.
JJ: Yes and I take full responsibility for that.

Sarah: What color are JJ's eyes?
Kaia: The crystal blue shine of ice when it's melting on a warm summer's day.
Sarah: What?
Kaia: I said blue.

Kaia: I'm holding the entire world in my hands.
JJ: You're holding my face.
Kaia: I know.
JJ, holding back tears: Oh.

JJ: You're the love of my life and I would do anything for you.
Kaia: I want you to eat three meals a day and have a decent sleep schedule.
JJ: Absolutely not.

JJ & Kaia: Hey can we bother you for a second?
Bea: You always bother me but go on.