DEV TOSSED AND TURNED FOR HOURS TO COME. Her mind was racing, guilt was racking her, and she knew the only way either thing would be satiated was if she spoke with Fred. Her relentless movements and efforts to get comfortable repeatedly awoke May beside her, but in an effort not to make her feel worse, May kept quiet.

When sunlight began peaking through the blinds to their room, Dev's mouth felt dry and her stomach heavy. It had been a few months since she'd gone without sleep, but the familiar sensation of heavy eyelids and effortless yawns was definitely not something she had missed. Breakfast would be in a few hours, and she assumed Dumbledore would take the opportunity then to explain where they go next. Had it all just been a misunderstanding, or was Cedric truly gone? Had You-Know-Who really returned? Would they be going home, despite having a week left of the school year?

Dev absently wondered if any of this had been addressed the night before, when the group of friends were stowed away in the Hogwarts grounds. None of them knew what happened in the time they were gone after the third task, or if Dumbledore had made any sort of statement. Some part of her knew that wasn't likely, that he probably would wait for ministry approval, but she had no way of knowing. Internally, she decided to ask her roommates once they awoke what she had missed.

May began to snore lightly beside Dev. Normally, she may have found the sound irritating, but in that moment, she found it reassuring. The sound helped her steady her breathing, which ultimately helped quiet her racing thoughts. The distant sound of birds chirping helped as well, until Dev realized the day was beginning as all do. It was as if nothing changed. As if Dev hadn't been forced to see her best friend's future death only 12 hours before, as if Cedric Diggory weren't lost forever. A father had lost his son, so many had lost a friend, and a girlfriend had lost her first love.

Oh no. Dev's stomach dropped as she realized that it was the first time she had thought of Cho since everything happened. If it hadn't been for her bloody vision, she would have ran to her immediately, to ensure she was okay. Now, she felt as if she were going to throw up, imagining what Cho must be going through. Although Cho wouldn't know, Dev could relate to the gut-wrenching, tear-jerking pain she was going through. The pain of seeing the death of your first love.

Dev suddenly felt too sick to remain in bed, so she slowly and carefully turned and placed her feet on the floor. She repeatedly checked to make sure she didn't wake May as she gathered her things and prepared to get ready for the day. It was a Sunday, and she wasn't really sure what she was preparing for. It was far too early for breakfast and she was certain people would be reluctant to venture out of their dorms. So, she decided to settle on embarking on the plan she had been mulling over for hours; talking to Fred.

Dev ran a comb hurriedly through her light brown hair and splashed her face with some water. Truthfully, it did little to make her look any more refreshed, but she couldn't find it in herself to care. After tugging on a jumper and a pair of jeans, she slid on a pair of shoes and quietly exited the dorm then her house as a whole.

The walk to the Gryffindor common room was eerily quiet, to the point that even the portraits lining the walls and the ever present ghosts seemed sullen. While she could simply write that all off as it being too early in the hours of the morning for people to be up and about, she knew it was more than that. It was the aftermath of a tragedy, the ever-present silence found in the wake of disaster. The dust had settled, but no one was quite sure how to talk about it yet.

As Dev neared closer to the Gryffindor house, she was struck with the realization that she was entirely unsure how she's going to get in. Most likely, she would just have to wait outside until someone let her in, which could be hours. Still, she knew she wouldn't be able to focus on anything other than speaking with Fred, so she resigned to wait as long as she needed to.

When the portrait of the fat lady finally came into view, Dev's brows furrowed when it almost immediately swung forward. Clearly, someone was exiting the Gryffindor common room, which was shocking for the current hour. Dev's movements slowed as she awaited whoever would approach, and she mentally prepared herself to ask them to let her in to the common room.

Upon seeing the flash of red hair and the lanky figure as the person stood to full height, Dev realized she wouldn't need to be asking to be let in. It was Fred. Even more peculiarly, Dev found he was alone as the portrait swung shut behind him with no sign of George. Fred spotted Dev a moment later, a similar look of confusion mirroring on his features.

"Huh," Fred coughed after a moment, his familiar grin appearing. "Funny, I was actually on my way to break into the Ravenclaw tower. You just made my task a whole lot easier."

"Why?" Dev took a few steps closer to him, stopping when they were at a familiar, comfortable distance.

"Well, to see Roger Davies, of course."

When Dev rolled her eyes and swatted lightly at his arm, he simply chuckled in response. After a moment, they both went quiet, their smiles turning small and sheepish. Although unspoken, it was clear they were both on the way to see one another.

"Is everything okay?" Fred was the first to speak.

"Oh yeah, I couldn't really sleep." Dev answered, and it wasn't exactly a lie.

"Ran out of the potion?" Fred furrowed his brows. He had just given her another not long before, so she certainly shouldn't be out so quickly.

"I didn't try to take any." Dev shook her head. "Just, too much to think about."

"Like what?" Fred cocked his head to the side. Almost immediately after the words left his mouth, his face paled and he straightened up. "Oh, right."

Dev assumed he was thinking about Cedric, and the air soon turned awkward. As awful as she felt about it, she realized she'd hadn't thought about him as much as she should. In any other circumstance she'd be wrecked with guilt about what happened to him, but currently Fred was at the forefront of her mind. She couldn't think of Cedric's death when Fred's was so clearly etched to her brain. It was haunting her.

"Not just that," Dev shook her head. "I, uh, actually wanted to talk to you. That's why I came."

"Yeah?" Some color had returned to his face, but it was clear he was somewhat nervous. It wasn't an emotion she saw often on him, and it only made her more anxious.

While Dev wanted to go somewhere more private to have this discussion, all of her emotions were bubbling too fervently inside of her. She couldn't hold off this conversation a moment longer, she needed to do it now. She had to tell him, before she lost the nerve to do so. Drawing in a deep breath, she took another step closer to him before forcing herself to meet his confused gaze.

"Yesterday, you said you would do anything for me—"

"—I would." He interrupted, sounding as if he'd never been more sure of something in his life.

"And you said you trusted me." Dev sighed, beginning to fumble with her fingers as her emotions grew even more overwhelming.

"I do." He nodded.

"You shouldn't." Dev barked out in a humorless laugh, letting her hands drop at her side. "I've kept so much from you, Freddie, and it isn't fair to you. I've been awful this whole year, and you've done nothing but be there for me, and—"

"Stop that." Fred cut her off firmly, placing his hands on her shoulders. "Stop doing that. You've been dealing with so much, give yourself some credit. I mean, I wish you had told me, but that was your choice to make. Don't beat yourself up over it."

"It's not just that, Freddie." Dev bit down on her lip, searching his face as his brows scrunched together. "I—." She stuttered, wanting nothing more than to slip from his grip and hide away. In this moment, she realized why she hadn't been put in a Gryffindor. She felt like the biggest coward. Still, she couldn't back out now. "I have to tell you something."

"Go on, then." Fred dropped his hands, shoving them into his pockets. It was clear he was trying to read her expression, and Dev wondered when he'd gotten so good at doing so.

"No laughing, yeah?" Dev mumbled, breaking the serious aura encapsulating them. Fred's lips curled upwards ever so slightly before he nodded.

In the early hours of the morning on that Sunday in June, Dev knew her life was about to change once more. Similar to the feeling she had that early morning on her first ride to Hogwarts, the sensation was overwhelming. As her anxieties muddled with her heightened perceptions, she found it was impossible to tell if this change was about to be for the better or the worse. Either way, it was time she told him. Fred deserved the truth.

"I... I think I may be in love with you?"

A beat of silence. Dev couldn't meet his eyes.

"Or, maybe not. I don't know. Maybe it's not love, of course I have no experience with that sort of thing. I mean, I've hardly dated, and it's not like I ever got to see my parents be in love." At the mention of her parents, she paused her rambling, if only for a moment. "Merlin, that was morbid to bring up. What am I on about?"

When Fred remained frozen and didn't immediately speak up, Dev drew in another breath and continued. Some part of her felt like she was digging herself into a deep hole, but she couldn't help but need to fill the awkward silence.

"I don't think I've ever really seen love, you know? Of course, your parents seem very in love, but I don't spend that much time around them. So I don't really know what it looks like, or feels like. But I do know that sometimes when you're around I get so many butterflies I can hardly speak. And, I know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you. And when I think about my happiest memories, they're always with you. If I could choose a memory to live in forever, it'd be when it was just you and me outside of the burrow, looking up at the stars. That must be love, right?" As she finally paused to take a breath, overwhelming regret filled her from the look on his face. "Or maybe it's just stupid."

"What about George?" His voice was a bit angrier than she'd expected and his words certainly weren't what she'd expected to hear.

"What about him?" Dev furrowed her brows, her voice coming out shaky as he'd had yet to really comment on her confession.

"You can't just fancy George a few months ago then love the other twin now. That's fucked up, Dev." He put the 'love' in air quotes with his fingers, his jaw clenched angrily as he spoke.

"I—," She groaned, throwing her face in her hands before pushing her hair back and forcing herself to look back at the boy. Of course she should have known that false confession would haunt her. She shuttered at how disgusted he looked at her. "I never fancied George, okay? It was always you, I was just too scared to say it."

"Then you lied, which I'm finding out you do a lot." Fred responded softly, clearly not completely believing her. "Why should I believe you now?"

Dev thought for a moment, before pulling all of her hair into a ponytail. She could almost hear May laughing in her ear, the one who had so often told her that her lies would catch up to her. Now, she gestured to her exposed ears, thinking back on the tell Fred had pointed out months before in the astronomy tower. If he could tell she wasn't lying, maybe she could convince him.

"Fred, I never fancied George," She stated calmly. "I've like you since third year." She paused, unsure if it worked. "If you still don't believe me, you can ask May or George—"

"You really mean it?" His voice was still soft as he stepped even closer to her, their chests now brushing against one another. He gazed down at her, his eyes shifting between her ears and her eyes. "All of it?"

"I do." Dev nodded. "I've been so stupid, about so much. And I understand if you're angry or if you need some time away from me. But I just didn't want to tell you and ruin our friendship, I mean it's okay that you don't feel the same way—"

Dev was cut off by Fred swiftly cupping her cheeks and pulling her lips to his own. The kiss was intoxicating, even more so than the strongest love potion. She melted into him, her eyes fluttering shut, unable to stop herself from smiling into the kiss.

Kissing Fred was like being on top of the world. Dev felt as if she were at the highest point on a Ferris wheel, or soaring through the sky on a broom. One of his calloused thumbs slowly stroked her cheek bone, being the only thing to keep her grounded. When he slowly pulled away, she thought she'd be disappointed, but she had a feeling she'd share plenty more life changing kisses with him. Fred lowered his hands to her waist, keeping her close to his body.

"Don't put words in my mouth, Bane." Fred grinned when he finally opened his eyes. "I never said I didn't feel the same way."

Devora beamed brightly at the boy, unable to hold in her happiness.

"I mean, I think I could have had a more smooth confession, but you captured the gist of it I suppose." He chuckled as Dev rolled her eyes and fought a deep blush.

"Shut it, you git." Dev swatted at him, a light smile still on her lips.

A moment of silence passed as they just stared at one another. Fred leaned a bit down, letting his forehead rest against hers. She let her eyes shut as she took in the moment, unable to believe this wasn't simply the best dream she'd ever had. A question rolled around in her mind, desperate for her to pose.

"How long?" Her voice was soft, but it was no matter, with how close they stood to one another. "How long have you felt the same way?"

"Merlin, too long." Fred sighed, looking up as if he was recalling a memory. "I reckon a lot longer than I realized. But I didn't really know until you told me you fancied George."

Dev gasped lightly and her blush deepened.

"I'm never going to live that down." She groaned as she leaned into his shoulder to avoid his gaze.

"Never," Dev could practically hear the grin in his voice. "It wasn't like I was jealous. But, when I told George, he started freaking out about how he was going to have to let you down and how bad he felt. And, of course, I told him he was being dramatic. And he said something along the lines of 'What? Like you wouldn't be freaking out if you found out your best mate fancied you?' And I realized if it was you fancying me, I wouldn't be freaking out. In fact, I couldn't think of anything that would be wrong with that."

Dev blushed, letting her eyes wander down towards her feet. She felt him lean his head down towards her ear, and a cluster of goosebumps arose as his breath fanned over the exposed skin of her neck.

"Then I remembered you 'fancied' my git brother, and realized I was fucked." He teased.

"I'm sorry, okay! I panicked when I said it!" Dev whined, finally raising her eyes to look at him.

"I'll make a note not to listen to anything you say when under pressure." Fred chuckled.

Slowly, they leaned back into one another, pressing their lips together in another kiss. This one was less urgent, but no less passionate. Their lips moved together slowly, comfortably. It was as if they had been doing this for years, rather than mere minutes. When they pulled apart, Dev couldn't help but grin at the drunken expression on Fred's face.

"So, no more secrets, yeah?" Fred inquired as he pressed a kiss to Dev's forehead.

"No more secrets."

Her fingers were crossed.

She had one secret she could never utter to him, and it wasn't the vision of his death. No, because she was certain that particular vision would never come to fruition. She wouldn't let it. Rather, the secret she now harbored from him was one she didn't feel guilty about keeping. It was the secret that she planned to be the one lying motionless beneath the rubble. And that was a secret she planned to take to her grave.

author's note !

ahhhhhh

I don't even know what to say really

even though they have now confessed, there is still so much to come. And it's going to be a lot more serious than the light storylines of 'does he like me, does he not' in the beginning. I am excited.

6th year is finished! let me know what you think :')

rose <3