Book: Under A Shattered Sky
Author: Northwind000
Reviewer: Nikachu22
Chapters read: 3
Main Focus: None

Cover:
The cover is clear. I like that it draws me in with the cracks in the sky. Something that is usually painted as beautiful, this author uses that to help me understand the foreshadows of the book-- an emotional roller coaster. Covers help pull in readers, and I think this one is simple yet speaks volumes. I like how the title is visible even with such a strong background picture.

Title:
Again the title embodies and feeds off the cover, piquing my curiosity. First impressions matter, and I think with these two balancing each other out, the author has set the mood at first glance.

Blurb:
There are a few grammatical errors, I think running it through something like Grammarly can fix it. The blurb does well with explaining the book. Not too much information is withheld or told which gives me enough to know whether or not I choose to read it.

Plot:
Since the story is still in the early stages with only a few parts released, it's challenging to grasp the plot beyond the initial details provided. I enjoy more when a plot unfolds as the story progresses (More chapters published). The blurb and the prologue appear inconsistent, and confusing at the beginning. I am aware that they appear to be stand-alone, but I think there still needs to be a clear-cut transition. The blurb mentions Dust's encounter with Asher, aligning with the first chapter. However, Shadow Walker is not mentioned in the blurb, yet Dust's mother instructs her to find him at the prologue's end, leading me to believe that Dust's search for Shadow Walker, is a central plot element. This key detail is absent from the blurb, which is where the confusion originates.

The importance of the prologue to the story is unclear. There seemed to be two different reasons why Dusts was leaving.

Writing Style:
I suggest keeping the point of view consistent. The prologue is written in first person and chapter one is in third. If I had to choose which view, I would suggest third because the author plays around with a lot more description.

Word Building:
To help with word building, describe characters, the setting, and emotions. I'll use an example from chapter one.

Author's version: Silence stretched between them, broken only by the rustling of leaves.

Edited: Between them, a moment of silence falls. Dust finds herself in harmony with the warm breeze that stirs the trees behind her. The rustling leaves compelled her ears to perk up, darting toward the familiar sounds as though they were intruders upon the moment. She takes a slow breath, feeling the rise in her chest. As one season fades and another approaches. The subtle scent of rain beckons that cool temperatures are close.

The pacing in the prologue is pretty fast in terms of dumping a lot of information for readers to take in. The entire prologue can be slowly broken down into segments and placed in various chapters because I feel as though the prologue is just information. Some of that information is already told in the introduction/first chapter so it's repeating.

There is nothing to help show the introduction character portrayal or anything so significant to the plot that it has to be told at that exact moment.

I get that she is searching/planning to search for her friend who just vanished, but there’s not much in the prologue that’s given between the characters to help readers support their relationship or her drive to pursue her friend. All the author does is tell us repeatedly how the group is bonded with their little secluded pact.

We are given a little moment where Shadow Walker enters the crew, but then the information dumping starts.

I think what would help the prologue is to write a moment where the two friends are having a good time and they are emotionally connecting about what’s happening between the Bonds. Include maybe a promise being said to Shadow Walker by Dust that she hopes nothing ever happens to him or she will look for him and just simply have him smile back. He seems a little timid and lacking in confidence so play on that and get something going between them. As the moment ends then fill us in with some detail about the Bonds but not too much.

You want a clear and smooth transition. Maybe something in this order.

Lead the prologue off with Shadow Walker already in the group and he and Dust having a heart-to-heart. Harvest their personalities and show how much they’ve bonded. Let his timid personality shine and when Dust promises to him that she won’t ever leave him, have him smile. He won’t promise back. (Only cause he will leave later.)
This will set up the ending of the prologue nicely.
Then, fill us in about the history of the Bonds and why this little group has come to, but again not too much.

After that transition again into the character interaction. Maybe Dust feels uneasy about Shadow Walker's responses and suddenly asks him if will he come tomorrow. He nods and smiles. They talk a little before the day ends and Dust goes home. The next day, she gets up the next morning and goes to the hideout only to find he’s gone.

******* What will drive the scene of Dust and Shadow forward is the authors's capacity to authentically portray Shadow Walker. In the prologue, he is key to really revving up the first impression in my opinion. I only state this because of his personality. Mystery is an excellent tactic for captivating readers. Whether to love or hate him. Dust will be the icing on his cake.********

---After Dust finds that Shadow is gone freely tell us how each one of the other members started to disappear, which gives Dust her push to find answers. She goes home crying to her sickly mother in shambles and then eventually the rest of the prologue happens from this point out.

Once you begin Chapter One, maybe put some sort of time skip point at the top of the chapter or you could mention it in the beginning paragraphs. So that readers can understand how much time has passed. It'll help us as readers feel closer to Dust and sympathize with her because she's been without her friends for quite some time and that has to be devastating. Her only happiness is gone and now we will understand the personality/characteristics she shows. This will also set her up as the plot goes on. What she will become as she navigates through the story and finds the answers. Will her sadness stay? Will she still like her friends? All of these will be answered I am sure.

Chapter 1
I like the interactions between her and Asher. I think that with some word building/detail, it will just enhance the two, but I don't have any complaints about it. The only thing I can mention is that Asher's approach seems oddly similar to Sky Walker's. It feels like I'm reading Dust and Sky Walkers meeting all over again. He comes up slowly, unsure of himself. He has the same scar.

I'm not sure if this is a hint that he is possibly Shadow Walker. But even if he's not, when she first meets him why isn't Dust reminded of her friend/the pact and how Shadow Walker also distinctively had a jagged scar as well?

Is the prologue the past or the future? The only thing that supports the Prologue being the past is Dust's name change.

The small plot points I'm pointing out hinder the transitions of the story and I can't seem to grasp what I am reading as a whole. I understand what I am reading individually, but the pieces must also fit together in order for it to be complete.

Closing Comments:
The story is still fresh so there isn't much I could go on about. I think with a little clarity, smooth transitions, and more depth into the characters/plot, the writing will start to fall in place. I like the overall idea of the writing. The Bonds and Cats with Wings is original. I have never read anything like it. Refreshing to see such creativity and I wonder where the author will take the story. I can say that the author has a very creative approach to creating a book that is not only shrouded in a ball of sadness but there's a sense of hope, innocence, and serenity that's sort of cast over the characters. As if they will overcome their pain and not have to deal with too much hurt, but the level of hurt is necessary in the world they live in. Cats are resilient creatures and they're beautiful down to their tails. This book makes me reminisce on a movie I watched many years ago with my family called Watership Down about a family of rabbits navigating the harsh world. You're doing a great job Northwind. Keep writing.

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