chapter twenty-five:
❛ finding yourself ❜

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tw: mention of eating disorder

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Sunny took a deep breath as she stepped into the hospital room, the sterile scent of antiseptic hanging in the air. She had been trying to prepare herself for this moment, but nothing really prepared her for the sight of Martiza, her best friend, sitting up in the hospital bed with a quiet, distant look in her eyes. It had been weeks since the accident, and Sunny had visited Martiza every day, but this goodbye-this final moment before Martiza left for New York to see a specialist-felt different. Martiza wasn't the same person anymore. Not completely, at least.

Martiza's memories had been stripped away in the fall. Some things she could recall-bits and pieces of her life-but so much was lost. And now, Sunny had to say goodbye to the person who had been her closest confidante, the one person she could always rely on. Martiza would leave, and everything would change.

As Sunny walked closer to Martiza's bed, she saw that Miguel was already there, standing quietly by the bedside. His back was to her, but his slumped posture was unmistakable. Miguel, despite everything, was still here for Martiza, and Sunny knew how hard it must've been for him. Martiza's ex, the guy who had been there through the highs and lows of her life-now he was here, too, saying goodbye.

Sunny couldn't ignore the way the air shifted as she saw Miguel in a wheelchair at the door, ready to leave. There was something sad in his eyes, a deep sorrow she hadn't seen in a long time. She walked toward the door just as Miguel was about to wheel himself out, his expression clouded with defeat.

"Wait," Sunny called out before Miguel could leave.

Miguel turned, his face showing a mix of surprise and exhaustion. He didn't speak, just looked at her for a long moment. His eyes were heavy, like the weight of the world rested on his shoulders, and maybe, just maybe, that's how he felt.

Sunny gave him a small nod before she turned back to Martiza. "I'll be right back," she said softly to Miguel before walking up to Martiza's bed.

"Hey, Mars," Sunny said, her voice gentle. She pulled up a chair beside Martiza's bed and sat down. Martiza blinked at her, her eyes soft and confused as she looked up at her best friend.

"Sunny," Martiza said quietly, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. It was a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes, but it was the best she could do for now. Martiza's memory wasn't what it used to be, and even the simplest things felt like struggles.

Sunny smiled back, even though her heart felt like it was breaking. She leaned down to give Martiza a hug, wrapping her arms tightly around her.

"I'm gonna miss you so much, Mars," Sunny whispered, her voice thick with emotion. Martiza's arms slowly came around her, hesitant at first, but she hugged her back.

"I'm sorry," Martiza said softly, her voice shaky. "I don't remember... I don't remember much. I don't even remember... I'm so sorry."

Sunny pulled back a little, cupping Martiza's face in her hands and looking her in the eyes. "Mars, never apologize," she said with a soft, steady voice. "This isn't your fault. It's just... part of life now. And we'll get through it. You're still you, and I'll always be here for you. No matter what you remember, I'll be here."

Martiza's eyes filled with tears, and she blinked rapidly as a few slipped down her cheeks. She looked down, the weight of everything too much to bear. "I feel like I've lost so much... and you... you're all still here, and I'm... different."

Sunny's throat tightened, and she hugged Martiza tighter. "You're not different. You're still Mars, the girl who knows how to make everyone laugh, the girl who always has my back, the one who can dance her way through any awkward situation. Don't ever forget that."

Martiza cried softly, her shoulders trembling in the embrace. Sunny held her for a while longer before pulling away gently, brushing a tear from Martiza's cheek.

"Hey," Sunny said softly, trying to lighten the moment. "You better not forget me when you go off to New York, okay?"

Martiza gave her a weak smile. "I won't forget you, Sunny. Promise."

"Good," Sunny said, her smile faltering for a second. "Now go get better, okay? Get your memories back and come home. We'll figure it all out, I promise."

As Sunny stood up to leave, she gave Martiza one last hug, whispering, "I love you, Mars. Always."

She walked out into the hallway, her steps heavy with the weight of what she had just said, what she was leaving behind. But there was no time to dwell on that, not now.

Miguel was still sitting in his wheelchair, looking out the window, his fingers gripping the armrests like they were the only thing holding him together.

"Miguel," Sunny said as she approached him.

Miguel slowly turned to her, his face pale, the exhaustion in his eyes evident. He opened his mouth to say something, but he didn't get the chance before Sunny spoke.

"I can't believe this happened," Miguel said quietly. "I tried to keep her from getting hurt when we fell. Me? I'm paralyzed from the waist down... and her? She's lost so much of herself... all of her memories. All she remembers of me is the koala we got on our first date, and... that's it. That's all."

Sunny stepped closer to him, her heart breaking at the pain in his voice. She knelt down beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder, her voice soft. "Miguel... it's not your fault. You did everything you could. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. But Martiza's strong. She's going to get through it. And so will you."

Miguel let out a ragged breath, his eyes brimming with unshed tears. "I don't know how, Sunny. I don't know how we both can get through this."

Sunny squeezed his shoulder gently, offering him a small, understanding smile. "You don't have to do it alone, Miguel. You have people who care about you. And Martiza, she's gonna fight. She's got this. And so do you."

Miguel gave her a small, grateful nod, the weight on his shoulders not quite as heavy as before. Sunny stayed by his side, offering him comfort in the quiet moment, knowing that, somehow, they would both make it through.

The sun was just beginning to rise as Jameson pulled up to the front of the school, his old sedan humming softly as it came to a stop. Sunny yawned and ran her fingers through her hair, still groggy from the long night. The car door opened, and her dad shot her a warm smile.

"Have a good day, sweetheart," Jameson said, leaning over to give her a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Thanks, Dad," Sunny replied, offering a tired grin. "See you later."

As she stepped out of the car, she waved goodbye and adjusted the strap of her backpack, taking in the sight of her high school. It felt surreal walking into the building each day, as if she was navigating a different world, one where things never quite felt as simple as they used to. Today, though, Sunny was hoping for a fresh start.

Sunny spotted Moon and Yasmine standing by the entrance. Moon, her twin sister, was rocking a relaxed, artsy look-vintage jacket, ripped jeans, and a pair of Converse. Yasmine, on the other hand, was always a vision of confidence, her expression hard to read but her presence undeniable. The two were talking in hushed tones, but when they saw Sunny approach, they both straightened up.

"Hey, Sunny!" Moon greeted with her usual bubbly energy, her grin stretching across her face.

Sunny smiled, feeling the familiar warmth of her twin's presence. "Hey, Moon. What's up?"

Moon's eyes flickered over to Yasmine, who stood with her arms crossed, her posture a bit defensive. Moon raised an eyebrow, leaning toward Yasmine slightly. "Yas," she said with a teasing smile, "don't you have something to say to Sunny?"

Yasmine, usually the type to brush things off with a smirk, let out a long sigh. Her lips tightened for a second before she exhaled deeply, her shoulders dropping slightly as if she was mustering up the courage for something difficult.

"I... uh... I wanted to apologize," Yasmine began, her voice uncharacteristically soft. "For what I said... before. About your body. I was being a complete jerk, and... I really didn't mean it. I've been thinking about it for a while, and I want you to know I'm sorry."

Sunny blinked, stunned into silence. Yasmine, apologizing? That was... unexpected. Yasmine wasn't exactly known for admitting when she was wrong. In fact, the whole idea of her apologizing was so rare that it felt like a foreign concept. Sunny's mouth opened and closed, her mind struggling to process what was happening.

"Wait, what?" she finally managed, her voice a little higher than usual. "Yasmine, you're actually apologizing?"

Yasmine ran a hand through her hair, the usual edge to her demeanor still lingering but mixed with something a little more vulnerable. "Yeah," she muttered, eyes avoiding Sunny's. "I've been an idiot. I shouldn't have said what I said about you... and your body. It wasn't cool. I can be a better person than that."

Moon, always the one to lighten the mood, grinned and gave a playful nudge to Yasmine's shoulder. "See? I told you it wasn't that hard."

Yasmine rolled her eyes at Moon's teasing but didn't argue. She turned back to Sunny, and for a moment, her gaze softened. "Look, I know you're probably not gonna just forgive me right away, and I don't expect you to. But I wanted to say it. I'm sorry."

Sunny, still processing the sudden shift in Yasmine's behavior, felt a knot form in her stomach. Part of her wanted to believe it, wanted to let the apology wash over her, but another part of her felt the weight of everything that had happened before. The hurt. The shame. The way Yasmine's words had lingered in her mind.

After a long pause, Sunny sighed and shook her head. "I don't know, Yas," she said, her voice quiet but steady. "I mean, it's... it's hard to just forgive like that. You know?"

Yasmine nodded, her expression earnest but understanding. "I get it," she replied. "I just wanted you to know that I see it now. And I know it was wrong."

Moon watched the exchange quietly, sensing the heaviness in the air. She knew how much this meant to both of them.

"Maybe you can forgive her a little," Moon suggested gently, nudging Sunny's side with her elbow. "I know it's not easy, but Yasmine's trying. She's trying to be better, and that counts, right?"

Sunny glanced at Yasmine, who looked down at her feet for a moment, clearly feeling the weight of her actions. There was something about her that seemed more genuine now, less guarded. Maybe there was room for growth.

With a sigh, Sunny stepped forward and put a hand on Yasmine's shoulder. "Okay... I forgive you. But you have to know that it's gonna take some time. I'm not just gonna forget what happened."

Yasmine's face softened, and for a brief moment, a smile tugged at her lips. "I understand," she said quietly, her voice thick with sincerity. "I won't take that for granted."

Sunny nodded, the tension in her chest easing slightly. "Thanks for saying it. I... I appreciate it."

Before they could say anything else, the bell rang, signaling the start of the school day. The three girls shared a quiet, understanding look, and then began walking toward the entrance together, ready to face whatever came next.

As they neared the door, Sunny turned to Moon and gave her a grateful smile. "Thanks for nudging her, Moon."

Moon grinned back. "What are twins for, huh?"

Yasmine, still a little unsure but relieved, added, "I'm gonna try. I'll be better. Promise."

Sunny glanced at her, feeling the weight of her words, and though the scars from the past still lingered, she realized that maybe, just maybe, this was a step in the right direction.

"Let's get through today first," Sunny said, grinning slightly. "One step at a time."

Sunny, Moon, and Yasmine were seated at their usual table, chatting and eating their lunch when Demetri and Jade walked in, carrying their science project between them. Jade's excitement was palpable, practically radiating off her as she kissed Moon on the cheek, greeting her with a bright smile. Demetri, who was walking behind with the project covered by a tarp, waved at the group.

"Hey, Moon," Jade greeted, practically bouncing with energy. "Are you ready to rock... our Earth Science presentation?" she asked, her eyes shining with enthusiasm.

Demetri set the project down on the table, lifting his eyebrows with a confident grin. "This is it, folks. The culmination of our hard work. Are you ready to be amazed?"

Jade practically jumped up and down. She and Demetri had worked incredibly hard on the project. They were both proud of it-especially Jade, who had poured a lot of her energy into it.

Sunny could already tell how excited Jade was, and it made her smile. Despite the tension Yasmine sometimes created with her sassy comments, it was hard not to enjoy Jade's energy.

Yasmine, however, did not share the same level of enthusiasm. "I'm ready to go back to a world where we don't have to talk on a regular basis," she deadpanned, leaning back in her chair and looking somewhat uninterested.

Jade gave her a pointed look. "Come on, Yasmine. It's not that bad."

Demetri, with his usual playful sass, joined in. "Hey! My popularity's on the rise while yours is steadily declining," he teased, crossing his arms with a smirk.

Yasmine rolled her eyes but didn't respond.

Sunny glanced at Yasmine, unsure about how she felt. Despite everything, Yasmine had apologized for her past behavior, and Sunny had accepted it. But there was still something that bothered her. Demetri was clearly into Yasmine now, despite his previous obsession with Martiza, and it seemed odd to Sunny that Demetri didn't seem more upset about Martiza leaving for help. It was like he'd moved on too quickly.

But Sunny wasn't about to voice her concerns right now. She had more important things on her mind-like the awesome project in front of her.

Yasmine looked skeptical but raised an eyebrow. "So, what's under the sheet?" she asked, clearly wanting to move on from the snarky banter.

Moon, leaning forward with curiosity, joined in. "Yeah, show us, Metri!" she urged.

Sunny nodded eagerly. "Yes, please! I'm on the edge of my seat!" she exclaimed.

Jade squealed, her excitement building. "I'm glad you asked!" Demetri grinned, and then he began drumming his fingers on the table dramatically, as if preparing for a grand reveal.

"Behold... what scientists believe to be the Valley when dinosaurs roamed the Earth!" Jade exclaimed with a flourish, pulling the tarp off the project.

The group stared at the intricate Lego diorama in front of them. It was impressive-dinosaurs, trees, and a valley that looked like it came straight out of a science textbook, but with a playful, creative spin.

"Not bad! My parents may not have to pay for my A this time," Yasmine commented, giving a rare smile as she inspected the project.

Sunny raised an eyebrow, glancing at Demetri. "Your parents will never have to pay for an A again," he quipped, not missing a beat.

Jade and Sunny shared an amused look, and the two burst into laughter. It was just one of those moments that felt good-like everything was right in the world for a few minutes.

But then everything changed.

Before Sunny could even catch her breath, a loud thwack echoed through the air, and the project was hit by a flying soccer ball. The Lego dinosaurs and trees went flying in every direction, and the carefully constructed model was obliterated in an instant.

Jade and Sunny jumped up in shock, eyes wide, as the cafeteria fell silent for a moment. Then, as if to confirm who had caused the damage, the group looked over to see Hawk smirking at them from across the room.

Sunny's stomach churned with a mix of anger and disbelief. "What the heck?" she muttered, eyes narrowing at the blonde boy who had ruined something they had worked so hard on.

Tears sprang to Jade's eyes, and she stood up suddenly, her face flushed with frustration. "That took us three weeks!" she muttered through gritted teeth, before storming off, leaving the table behind.

"Jade!" Moon called after her girlfriend, her voice tinged with panic.

Sunny immediately stood up and glanced at Moon. "I'll talk to her, Moon," she said, her voice firm, and gave Hawk one last glare before hurrying after Jade.

As she left the cafeteria, Sunny could feel the hot rush of anger in her chest. What was wrong with Hawk? He'd ruined their hard work for no reason.

She caught up with Jade outside the cafeteria, her heart heavy with sympathy for her friend. Jade was pacing back and forth, her hand wiping away the tears that were already starting to fall.

"Jade, wait," Sunny said, catching her by the arm. "I know you're upset, but don't let him get to you. He's not worth it."

Jade stopped pacing and turned to Sunny, her face crumpling in frustration. "I just don't get it! We worked so hard on this, and he... he just ruins it like it's nothing!" she said, tears spilling down her cheeks. "It's not fair."

Sunny pulled her into a hug, squeezing her tightly. "I know, I know," she whispered. "But you're better than him. You always have been."

Jade sniffled but didn't pull away from Sunny's embrace. After a long moment, she pulled back and wiped her eyes. "Thanks, Sunny. I just... I needed to get it out."

Sunny nodded, offering a small, understanding smile. "Let's go get him back, though," she said, her voice steady. "He's not going to get away with this."

Sunny sat on the edge of the soccer field with Jade, both of them watching as Hawk and the rest of the Cobra Kai group swaggered past. Hawk, ever the self-assured jerk, gave Sunny a little nod and a smirk as they walked by. Sunny rolled her eyes and shook her head in response, not in the mood to entertain his nonsense.

Jade, still fuming over the destruction of her and Demetri's science project earlier, wasn't nearly as composed. "Screw you! You destroyed my project!" she yelled after Hawk, her voice sharp with anger.

Sunny nudged Jade gently with her elbow, trying to keep her from escalating things further. "Hey, calm down. Don't give him the satisfaction," she said quietly, keeping her tone neutral but firm.

Jade's eyes were still locked on Hawk's retreating back. Her fists clenched at her sides. But after a beat, she sighed, her shoulders slumping. "I can't believe that idiot. He just walks around like he owns everything, doesn't he?" she muttered, shaking her head in disbelief.

Sunny glanced back at Hawk for a moment, watching as his smirk faltered when he noticed Jade's angry words. For a second, there was something almost vulnerable in his expression, but it was quickly replaced by his usual smug demeanor. He didn't stop walking, though, as if the confrontation never happened.

"Ignore him," Sunny said, her voice a little softer now, though she couldn't hide the annoyance in her own expression. "It's not worth your energy."

Jade huffed, finally turning her attention back to Sunny. "Did I ever mention how arrogant your ex is?" she said with a bitter laugh.

Sunny chuckled softly, even though she wasn't sure how she felt about calling Hawk her ex. "Like ten times today," she replied, giving her friend a teasing smile.

But their lighthearted moment was quickly interrupted. Both girls' heads snapped up in surprise as they saw a group of Miyagi-Do students, led by Sam, face off against the Cobra Kai team. It was as if the soccer field had become a battleground, with the ball serving as the weapon of choice. The intensity in the air was palpable, and Sunny couldn't help but sigh, the familiar weight of tension settling over her shoulders.

Jade let out an exasperated groan. "Great. Just what we needed-another showdown between Miyagi-Do and Cobra Kai," she muttered, crossing her arms over her chest.

Sunny's gaze flicked from the confrontation to the teacher standing on the sidelines, watching it unfold with a wary expression. Before things could escalate any further, the teacher blew her whistle sharply, the sound cutting through the air like a knife.

"Everyone off the field! Principal's office, NOW!" she barked, her voice stern and commanding.

Sunny and Jade exchanged wide-eyed glances, both knowing exactly what that meant. "Shit," Sunny muttered under her breath.

"I'll be back..." Sunny said quickly, standing up from the grass and brushing the dirt off her legs. "Gotta go save Demetri and Sam's butts from getting in even more trouble..."

Without waiting for Jade's reply, Sunny jogged toward the group of students, her heart pounding in her chest as she moved quickly across the field. She spotted Demetri standing near Sam, both of them looking a little guilty and more than a little anxious. They had clearly been involved in the confrontation, and judging by their expressions, it wasn't going to be pretty when they faced the principal.

As she reached them, she planted her hands on her hips and stopped in front of them, her eyes narrowing slightly as she gave them a pointed look. "What the hell was that?" she scolded, her voice a mixture of concern and frustration.

Sam, ever the leader in moments like these, was the first to speak. "We were just... fighting back," she said, her voice calmer than Sunny had expected, though there was still a touch of guilt in her eyes.

Sunny shifted her focus to Demetri, who stood there with his hands held up in a mock surrender. "And you? You decided to throw a soccer ball at their faces?"

Demetri flashed a grin, clearly trying to defuse the situation with humor. "Hey, hey, I was just defending myself. You know how it goes."

Sunny raised an eyebrow, not entirely buying his excuse. "Defending yourself by starting a soccer war? That's not exactly what I had in mind when I told you to lay low." She crossed her arms over her chest, giving Demetri a pointed look.

Demetri winced, clearly realizing he might've made the situation worse. "Okay, maybe that wasn't the best call... but it felt right at the time."

Sunny let out a sigh, shaking her head but unable to hide the small smile tugging at the corner of her lips. "You guys are unbelievable, you know that?" she muttered, more amused than annoyed. "If the principal doesn't make you clean the entire school for the next week, I'll be shocked."

Sam and Demetri exchanged a glance, neither of them looking particularly worried about the punishment that awaited them. It wasn't their first trip to the principal's office, after all.

"We'll survive," Demetri said with a half-grin, his usual cocky attitude returning.

Sunny shook her head again but couldn't help but laugh. "You've got more confidence than I do. Just... try not to make it worse, okay? We don't need more attention from Cobra Kai right now."

Sam nodded, her face more serious now. "You're right. I'll keep it together. Promise."

Sunny gave them both a stern look before turning back toward the rest of the students who were now filing off the field. "Well, come on then. The longer we stand here, the more I'm sure the principal's going to have a field day with us."

With that, Sunny led the way toward the school building, her heart still racing from the tension of the fight, but feeling a little better now that she had gotten her friends to calm down. She wasn't sure what kind of trouble they were about to walk into, but one thing was for sure-they were going to face it together.

"Caldwell, Johnson, Rickenburger, Reynolds, the four of you and Eli are free to go," Sunny's heart pounded as she processed Counselor Blatt's words. Reynolds. Her last name echoed in her ears as if it was some kind of punishment she hadn't signed up for. She stood frozen, crossing her arms over her chest as her gaze shifted from the counselor to Hawk, who was smirking with his Cobra Kai friends. There was no way she was going to let this slide without some sort of explanation, but her anger simmered as she noticed how casually Hawk was brushing this all off.

"Unbelievable," Demetri muttered beside her, clearly just as baffled by the whole situation.

"You gotta be kidding me! What about us?" Sam demanded, her voice rising in frustration.

Counselor Blatt didn't seem phased by any of their protests. "The rest of you will be receiving rehabilitative, not punitive, Saturday detention." She gave a quick, dismissive wave, as if her decision had already been final.

Sunny felt the frustration bubble in her chest, her jaw tightening. "Rehabilitative detention? What, like we need to be 'fixed'?" she muttered, more to herself than anyone else. The counselor's suggestion only made her feel more like they were being punished for something that wasn't even their fault.

Her gaze returned to Hawk, and for a moment, their eyes locked. He smirked and then, without another word, walked off with his Cobra Kai friends, their laughter echoing down the hallway. But Sunny had had enough of this. She wasn't going to let him get away with this, especially not after everything that had happened between them.

She couldn't even remember the last time she had really talked to Hawk. Things between them had become so strained, so... tense. Their breakup was a slow unraveling, but that last fight-when everything had blown up-was still fresh in her mind.

Sunny pushed through the school's main doors, her frustration making her walk faster as she stalked toward the parking lot. She found Hawk leaning against his motorcycle, still chatting with his Cobra Kai friends, but he looked over at her as soon as he sensed her presence. He raised an eyebrow, his smirk returning.

"You really following me now, Sunny?" Hawk said, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

Sunny's chest tightened with all the things she wanted to say, but she could only start with one: "You really think it's funny, don't you? Watching my friends get punished for something they didn't do?"

Hawk rolled his eyes, clearly uninterested in her emotions. "Oh, please. You should be thanking me. I could've told them you were involved in that stupid soccer fight with Sam and Demetri. I could've thrown your name in there and made it sound way worse. But I didn't, did I?"

Sunny's blood ran cold at his words. "Oh, yeah, that's really generous of you," she spat. "What, you want me to thank you for not framing me? Is that it? For not turning my life upside down like you already did to everyone else?"

Hawk's smirk faltered just for a moment before he tilted his head, eyeing her with a look of indifference. "It's not my fault your friends can't handle their own problems. If they weren't so weak-"

"Stop!" Sunny interrupted, her voice rising. "Don't you dare say that! You're acting like this is some game. Like I'm just supposed to sit back and watch you destroy everything I care about. You don't get to act like you're above all of us-"

"I'm not," Hawk cut in sharply, pushing off his bike and taking a step closer to her. "But you need to understand that I'm not the same person anymore. I don't care about your little Miyagi-Do group or whatever they're doing. I don't owe you anything, Sunny."

Her chest tightened with frustration. "No, Hawk. You don't owe me anything, but what about Jade and Demetri? What about the project you destroyed that they worked so hard on?" She pointed an accusatory finger at him. "Jade cried, Hawk. She was so upset because of you. You didn't just ruin the project, you ruined something she was proud of. And you didn't even care."

The words hit him harder than he expected. His expression faltered, and for a moment, he looked almost guilty. But it was fleeting, gone as soon as it appeared. Hawk stood there silently, staring at the ground, as if trying to collect his thoughts. When he looked back up at her, the smirk had returned, but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"You really want to make this about Jade's stupid project?" Hawk's voice was low, but the sarcasm still laced his words. "I didn't mean to break it. But you know what? Maybe you all should stop playing the victim for once. Life's not always fair. If Jade can't handle a little setback, then maybe she shouldn't be so sensitive."

Sunny's hands were clenched into fists at her sides, the urge to shout at him almost overwhelming. "You've got no idea, do you? It's not about being sensitive, Hawk. It's about the fact that you've gone so far out of your way to make everyone's life miserable, including mine. You've changed. And not in a good way."

Hawk's gaze shifted, the anger in his eyes flickering for a brief moment before he quickly masked it with his usual apathy. "I'm not the same person you knew," he said, almost as if that was supposed to justify his actions.

"No," Sunny shot back, her voice thick with emotion. "You're not. And I don't know who you are anymore. Maybe I never did."

For a moment, there was nothing but silence between them. The weight of all their unresolved feelings hung in the air like a thick fog. Sunny looked at him, trying to see the boy she once loved, but all she could see was the person he had become-someone she didn't recognize.

Finally, she broke the silence. "I don't know if I'll ever forgive you for what you've done, Hawk. Not just to me, but to everyone you've hurt."

Hawk didn't say anything in response, his face unreadable as he climbed onto his motorcycle, revving the engine without another word. He didn't look back as he drove off, leaving Sunny standing in the parking lot, her heart heavy with the weight of the argument.

She didn't know what to think anymore. She had tried to hold onto the good in him, but it felt like he was slipping further and further away. And maybe it was time to let go, even though it hurt more than she was willing to admit.

After the heated exchange with Hawk, Sunny stood still for a moment, trying to collect herself. She had hoped, even if just for a second, that Hawk would somehow snap out of whatever fog he was in and return to the person she once knew. But now, she was left with a lingering sense of anger and confusion, the sting of his words still fresh in her mind.

Without thinking, she turned on her heel and marched back toward the group. Demetri was standing near the bleachers, talking with Sam, looking a bit out of place now that the tension in the air had settled. Sunny's eyes narrowed as she approached him, her mind racing with questions she had been holding onto for far too long. She couldn't stay silent anymore-not about this.

"Demetri," she called out, her voice sharper than she intended. He looked up, catching her glare.

"Hey, Sunny," Demetri said, his tone a little uncertain. "You good?"

"No, I'm not good," she snapped, crossing her arms tightly across her chest. "What the hell is going on with you?"

Demetri blinked, caught off guard. "What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb. I've been watching you, Demetri. Ever since Martiza left to get help, you've been acting like you two weren't even friends," Sunny continued, her frustration growing. "You barely talk about her, you don't visit her, and you're acting like you're not even upset."

Demetri opened his mouth to defend himself, but Sunny raised a hand, cutting him off. "I don't get it. Martiza was your friend, Demetri. She was there for you, and now that she needs help, you're just... ignoring her like it doesn't matter. Why haven't you visited her? Why aren't you showing any emotion about it?"

Demetri shifted uncomfortably, his eyes darting away from hers. "I've... I've been busy, okay? I've had a lot going on with school, and... I don't know, it's complicated."

Sunny's eyes narrowed. "Complicated?" She took a step closer, her voice rising with the anger she could no longer hold back. "It's not complicated, Demetri. She's your friend. She's struggling, and you're just letting her go through it alone. You're acting like you don't care, like it doesn't matter."

"No, I care! It's just... it's hard, alright?" Demetri's defense sounded weak, even to him. He ran a hand through his hair, visibly frustrated. "I don't know what to say to her. I don't know how to help her. I... I didn't want to make things worse. I thought giving her space would be better."

Sunny's eyes burned with frustration. "Space?" she echoed incredulously. "You think giving her space is the answer? Martiza needs her friends, Demetri! She needs you. Not this cold distance you're putting between you two like it's no big deal."

"I'm not putting distance between us on purpose!" Demetri snapped, his voice rising. "It's just... it's complicated, okay? She left without telling me, and I didn't know what to do! I didn't know how to... how to be there for her without making things worse. Maybe I'm not handling it the way you think I should, but I am upset, alright? I just... I just don't know what to do."

Sunny clenched her fists at her sides, the frustration building in her chest like a pressure cooker about to explode. "You're telling me you don't know what to do, but you're standing here acting like everything's fine, like you've just... moved on. That's not how it works, Demetri. You don't just move on from someone you care about when they're in pain!"

Demetri opened his mouth to argue again, but before he could, Sunny held up a hand. "I get it, okay? You're scared. You don't know how to fix things. But you know what? Martiza doesn't need you to fix her. She needs you to be there. And you're not, Demetri. And it's pissing me off."

For a long moment, Demetri stood there, silent. His gaze shifted uneasily, his face a mixture of guilt and confusion. "I... I didn't know what you wanted me to do, Sunny. I didn't think I could help."

Sunny shook her head, her anger still simmering but her voice quieter now. "You could've tried. You could've at least made an effort. But instead, you're standing here, acting like she's some distant memory. It's like you don't even care anymore."

Demetri took a deep breath, his shoulders sagging as he seemed to process what she was saying. His expression softened, a flicker of realization crossing his face. "I'm sorry," he murmured. "I didn't mean to act like I didn't care. I'm just... I'm messed up about it too, okay? I don't know how to deal with it."

Sunny's frustration began to ease, but there was still a tightness in her chest. "You don't have to deal with it alone, Demetri. You have friends. I'm here. But you have to stop pretending like nothing's wrong. You need to show her that you care. Because if you don't, then I'm not sure what to say anymore."

Demetri nodded slowly, looking down at the ground. "I... I'll try. I know I should've done more. I just... I didn't know what was right."

Sunny gave him a small, exhausted sigh, feeling a little better, but still frustrated. "You don't have to know everything. You just have to be there when she needs you. That's the only thing that matters."

With that, Sunny turned on her heel, walking away from Demetri as she felt the weight of the conversation still pressing down on her. She was still upset-about everything, about Hawk, about Demetri, about the way things seemed to be falling apart around her-but at least, in this moment, she knew she'd said what needed to be said.

The soft hum of music filled the air as Sunny stepped into the dance studio, the familiar scent of wood, mirrors, and sweat immediately enveloping her. The space felt different now, quieter, emptier than the days when it had been a constant presence in her life. But it still felt like home.

She hadn't danced in months. Between everything with school, the drama with Hawk, and the turmoil she felt inside, dancing had fallen to the back burner. But now, standing in front of the barre, she felt the urge to move, to escape into the rhythm, to lose herself in something that felt like her again.

Sunny took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment, and as the music began, her body started to move. It was slow at first, tentative, like she was testing the waters again. But then the beat hit harder, and her body responded-fluid, instinctual. She wasn't thinking anymore. She was just moving. Each pirouette, each graceful extension, felt like an act of defiance, as if her body was telling the world she wasn't giving up on herself just yet.

Her mind faded away, and it felt like she was on another planet-like nothing existed outside of the space between her and the music. The mirrors, the floor, the walls of the studio, all blurred into nothingness. It was just her, the beat, and the movement. The weight of her past, of everything that had been suffocating her, lifted with every step she took. The freedom she felt in the dance was something she hadn't realized she'd been craving.

As she leaped and spun, it was as if her body was flying, weightless. She imagined herself dancing through a starry night, each movement sending ripples through the vastness of the cosmos. The lights above her became distant stars, and the floor beneath her felt like a cloud. In this moment, there was no drama, no heartbreak, no confusion. Just her and the dance.

But the sound of the studio door creaking open broke through the trance. Sunny's eyes fluttered open, and she stopped mid-spin, her breath catching in her throat. She turned to see a familiar figure standing in the doorway.

Ms. Mara, her old dance teacher, was watching her with an affectionate smile, her arms crossed in front of her as she leaned against the doorframe.

"Wow," Ms. Mara said softly, her voice full of warmth and admiration. "I've missed seeing you dance, Sunny."

Sunny chuckled, a small, self-conscious smile pulling at her lips. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

"I thought you'd abandoned us for good," Ms. Mara continued, stepping further into the room. "You were always such a natural. This place... hasn't felt the same without you."

Sunny's smile faltered just for a moment, a pang of guilt creeping into her chest. "I-I kind of lost my way, I guess," she admitted, feeling the weight of her own words. "I thought karate could help me, but... I think I just lost myself more."

Ms. Mara tilted her head, her gaze soft but knowing. "You can't replace dancing with anything else, Sunny. It's a part of you. I can see it in the way you move, the way you lose yourself in it. That's not something you can walk away from."

Sunny let out a breath, her shoulders sinking. "I know. I know. But for a while, I felt like I needed to be something else. I thought if I kept fighting, I'd find something to hold on to. But it just... didn't feel right."

Ms. Mara smiled warmly, walking toward her with gentle steps. "And now you're back. That's what matters."

Sunny looked down, her heart heavy but lighter at the same time. "Yeah," she murmured, a small laugh escaping her. "Dancing... that's my passion. Always has been."

Ms. Mara reached out, placing a hand on her shoulder. "I knew it. I'm so glad you're here. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, Sunny. Just be yourself. And if that means dancing again, then that's what you should do."

Sunny nodded, a new determination rising within her. She felt like a weight had been lifted, and for the first time in a long while, she knew she was on the right path. The music played on softly in the background, but this time, it felt like her next step was already written in the rhythm of the song.

"I think I'm ready to come back," she said quietly, a soft smile on her lips.

Ms. Mara's eyes lit up. "Then let's see what you've got, Sunny."

With those words, Sunny felt the familiar thrill of the dance course through her once more. She wasn't just moving anymore; she was living, and that felt better than anything else she had tried to hold on to.

Sunny sat on the familiar couch in the therapist's office, her fingers nervously twisting the hem of her sleeve. The room was quiet except for the faint hum of the air conditioning, and the soft ticking of a clock on the wall. Her therapist, Dr. Halloway, sat across from her, her gaze steady and compassionate, as usual.

"So, Sunny," Dr. Halloway began, her voice calm and soothing, "How have you been feeling since our last session?"

Sunny hesitated, staring at the floor for a moment before meeting Dr. Halloway's eyes. "Honestly? I've been... trying to stay busy. Keeping myself distracted. There's a lot going on, you know?" She shifted uncomfortably, tapping her foot on the floor. "School, the whole mess with my ex... everything just keeps piling up."

Dr. Halloway nodded, her expression understanding. "It sounds like you've had a lot on your plate. And it's important to acknowledge how hard that can be. But, Sunny, I also want to ask how you're doing with something we've talked about before." She paused, choosing her words carefully. "How have you been managing your eating habits? Your eating disorder?"

Sunny stiffened at the mention of her eating disorder. She had been avoiding talking about it, pushing it to the back of her mind. But hearing Dr. Halloway ask about it so directly made it all come rushing back. She let out a quiet sigh, and for a moment, she wished she could just disappear into the couch. She fidgeted with her hands, feeling a lump in her throat.

"I don't know," Sunny muttered, her voice barely above a whisper. "I've been... trying. I guess I'm just... not really hungry a lot of the time. It's like my stomach is always full of knots. And sometimes, I just-" She cut herself off, swallowing hard. "Sometimes, I don't really eat. I can't bring myself to."

Dr. Halloway's expression softened, but she didn't look surprised. She'd known about Sunny's struggles before, but hearing her say it out loud was different. "Sunny, it's okay to feel conflicted about this. It's not uncommon to feel disconnected from your body when things feel overwhelming. But not eating, or restricting yourself, is not a healthy way to cope. Have you noticed any patterns? Like times when it's harder for you to eat, or things that trigger those feelings?"

Sunny closed her eyes briefly, trying to pinpoint when it was the hardest. "It's... when I'm really stressed out. Like, when I feel like I don't have control over anything else in my life. School, my friends, my family... it all just feels like too much sometimes. I start to feel like, if I could control this one thing... my body, my food... maybe everything else would be okay."

Dr. Halloway nodded thoughtfully, jotting something down on her notepad. "I understand. That sense of control is something a lot of people struggling with eating disorders experience. It can feel like the one thing you can manage when everything else feels chaotic. But the reality is, it often makes things harder, not easier. Your body needs food to function properly, Sunny, and not feeding it, especially when you're already under stress, is only going to make it harder for you to feel good, physically and emotionally."

Sunny clenched her fists in her lap. "I know. I know all that. But it's not that simple, Dr. Halloway. Sometimes it feels like... I'm not even me anymore. I'm just... fighting with myself every day. And when I look in the mirror, I don't know who I see. I feel like I'm just... floating through everything, not really connected to myself."

Her therapist took a moment before responding, her voice gentle but firm. "I hear you, Sunny. And I know it's not easy. But you're not alone in this, okay? We've talked before about finding healthier ways to manage your stress and emotions. I want you to remember that taking care of your body is a crucial part of that. We'll work through this together, one step at a time."

Sunny nodded slowly, her eyes dropping to her hands again. It felt like she was constantly taking one step forward, only to take two steps back. But maybe, just maybe, it would be worth it.

"I don't know if I can stop doing it," she whispered, her voice cracking slightly. "I don't know if I can stop trying to control it. It feels like it's the only thing I have left."

Dr. Halloway leaned forward, her expression sincere. "Sunny, you don't have to stop on your own. That's what we're here for, okay? To work through these feelings together. It might be a slow process, and there may be days when it feels like you're not making progress. But healing isn't linear, Sunny. It's okay to take it one day at a time. And you have people around you who care about you and want to help you through this. You don't have to do it alone."

Tears welled up in Sunny's eyes, but she quickly blinked them away. She wasn't ready to cry yet-not here, not like this. But hearing Dr. Halloway's words, seeing the genuine concern in her eyes, made something inside her stir. It was a glimmer of hope, one she hadn't felt in a long time.

"Okay," Sunny said quietly, her voice soft but more determined than before. "I'll try. I'll try to take it one day at a time."

Dr. Halloway gave her a small smile. "That's all I'm asking. We'll take it slow, together."

As the session drew to a close, Sunny felt a weight lift off her shoulders. Maybe she didn't have all the answers, and maybe the road ahead would still be tough. But for the first time in a while, she felt like she had a way forward. And that was enough for now.

ASH SPEAKS!!

i hope you enjoyed this super long chapter :)

i feel bad for sort of writing martiza out... BUT SHE'LL BE BACK!! she will come back at the end of s4 :)))

i changed sunnys therapist name again... SUE ME. HAHA

i love jade!!

the angst between sunny and hawk🤭

PLEASE DONT BE A GHOST READER!
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