Note: FINALLY I AM BACK! lol. Sorry for the long wait, guys! After I got back from vacation, I got on this Riverdale binge and yeah...no regrets ;) Okay, enjoy! Also forewarning - a LOT of things change drastically from here on out for the trio. And the song at the end of this chapter you can play while reading towards the end if you want. Also I made this chapter super long but it all goes with the storyline lol. So yeah, okay enough of me talking - enjoy! :)

Episode: Season 8 - We Need to Talk About Kevin Pt. 1

"Take me down to the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty, oh, won't you please take me home?..." the Guns N' Roses song sang out lowly from the radio.

I rolled my eyes just as another swear word left Dean's lips, making me chuckle as I shook my head. Dark locks fanned out around my head as I leaned up against the backseat in Baby, the sun streaming through the smudged glass windows down onto my bare legs poking out of my jean shorts. Why my boyfriend picked one of the hottest days of the year to work on Baby is beyond me. A huff escaped my lips as I propped my feet on the back of the passenger seat.

"Are you done yet?" I sang out, frustration lacing my voice.

One loud bang, hiss of pain, and then another cuss word. Dean's head popped up from over the hood of the Impala, green eyes glaring at me through the windshield. I smirked over at him, waving sarcastically as I sat up straighter.

"You know, I could get this done a lot faster if you'd help," he arched his eyebrows over at me, emphasizing the last words.

A roll of my dark eyes made him mutter something under his breath before his head disappeared behind the hood once more. I grinned, leaning back into the soft leather seat once more. I loved him, don't get me wrong. But messing with him was still fun - even on a hot day such as this. I just couldn't resist. Sitting up and twisting my body around to where I was halfway in the front seat and half way in the back, my torso stretched across the two like Slinky Dog from Toy Story.

Extending my fingers as far out of the vehicle as they'd reach, I finally managed to hook my index and middle finger around the silver strut holding up the hood. Grinning to myself, I yanked on it hard and it released. A resounding boom came as the hood fell and a loud cry of pain followed by many, many cuss words.

"Ooh, those aren't nice words, Dean-o. But I bet Bobby has some soap you can-" I started to mock, a huge grin never leaving my face.

Suddenly, Dean was stalking towards the front door of the Impala and my eyes widened, giggling as I scrambled into the backseat like I was on fire. The guitar rifts of the song was playing now, matching the beat of my heart as it raced in my chest. And then, Dean was on top of me, straddling me while he pinned my arms to the seat as I squirmed beneath him, laughing like crazy.

"Let me go!" I said between chuckles, my eyes meeting his own breathtaking green orbs.

"Not until you say you're sorry," he demanded, a hint of teasing in his voice.

I heard a clap of thunder from outside then and finally, I noticed the sky had darkened around us. But Dean only grinned as he gazed down at me.

"Never!" I smirked up at him, arching my eyebrows briefly in defiance.

"Say itttt," he demanded again, trying to hold back his own laughter as he strung out the word.

"Nev-" I started but was cut off by the smash of his lips on mine as he captured them in a bruising kiss, the rain finally pelting the glass pane of the windows.

His touch was like velvet as his hands slid down my arms, releasing me as they moved to rest on my neck. Our lips melded to each other, fitting like puzzle pieces. I could feel his tongue dart out against my lips, demanding entry and I granted it as he deepened the kiss. My own hands tangled in his short blond hair as I kissed him harder. Soon though, all the air in our lungs had run out and we broke apart, panting. It felt like my heart would burst at how happy I was in that moment as I gazed up into those candy-apple green eyes that shone with such love. For me.

"Promise me this is forever," I said breathlessly, our faces still so close I could feel his warm breath on my skin.

Slowly, a grin split his face and he nodded, "I promise."

Biting my lip once before grinning myself, I crashed my lips back into his, feeling my heart soar in my chest as a new song began to play on, drowned out only by the sound of our lips meeting again and again.

"Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for, you can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for. You know it's true - everything I do, I do it for you..."

I woke up with a gasp, dark brown eyes flying open, seeing only darkness around me. For a second, I didn't know where I was or how I even got there. But then, it all came back to me in flashes as the sound of a baby's cry pierced the air. Eyes fluttering shut if only briefly, my head fell back to the pillow, dark hair fanning out around me. It had only been a dream. Just another dream...

Shaking my head, I finally lifted myself up off the bed and quickly pulled on the light blue housecoat on the nightstand over my short black nightgown. My head turned then and I caught sight of the other side of the bed - empty. I frowned, feeling a pang in my chest. But I didn't dwell on it, instead padding across the carpet towards the small nursery adjacent to my own room. It was painted just the way I had envisioned it ever since finding out I was pregnant - the walls a beautiful etching of tigers, lions, birds, and other animals surrounded by a jungle as well as baby toys scattering the floor. A smile found its way onto my face as I stepped up to the crib and picked up the small infant in my arms.

I gazed down at my child lovingly, feeling my heart swell with love. My eyes roved over the light caramel skin and tiny tufts of raven-black hair before locking onto those beautiful candy-apple green eyes, a carbon copy of my child's father. A cry left the infant's mouth and a soft shush escaped my mouth as I began to bounce the baby up and down gently in my arms.

"It's alright, Yasmin. Shh, it's okay, sweetheart. Momma's here now." I told her softly, cooing so as to calm her down.

And sure enough, it was only a couple of minutes later before she finally drifted off back to sleep. Smiling down at her, I settled her back in her crib before slipping out of the room and back to my own room. As I made my way there, I could just hear the faint sound of a song drifting in through my open bedroom window.

"I don't want to know who we are without each other, it's just too hard..."

But as I stepped back inside, the emptiness closed in around me. It was like being suffocated - being here without him. Just in knowing we would never see each other again. I swallowed the thick lump that had formed in my throat as I padded over to the closet.

"I don't want to leave here without you,"

In my mind, memories seeped in as I searched the boxes in my closet and it all came back in echoes.

"IT WILL NEVER BE OKAY AGAIN! DEAN IS GONE!... HE'S GONE!" The tears came out in heaving sobs then as I crumpled to the floor, doubling over as I let everything out in an ear-piercing scream...

Finally, my eyes rested on the cardboard box I was looking for and I pulled it out as I knelt on the floor in front of it.

"I don't want to lose part of me,"

Opening up the flaps, the scent of old clothes filled my nose. Carefully, I dug through it before finding the one I was searching for.

"Will I recover that broken piece?"

Hot tears pricked my eyes as I plucked it out of the box, fingers skimming over the worn, brown leather jacket lovingly.

"Let it go and unleash all the feelings,"

Bringing it up to my face, my eyes fluttered shut briefly as I breathed in the scent of Dean still lingering on it. Clutching it to my chest, I felt all the memories wash over me in waves.

"Did we ever see it coming? Will we ever let it go?"

If I'd known what would happen that day, I'd never let him go. I would have demanded we stay at the hotel, let Dick Roman live. A hiccuping sob escaped my lips then as I realized the tears had finally made their way down my cheeks and finally, I picked myself up off the floor to crawl back into bed, jacket still held tightly to my chest.

"We are buried in broken dreams,"

The sobs came out one after other then and I was unable to stop them as the tears soaked my pillowcase, holding onto that jacket as if it was a lifeline. And in a way, it was.

"We are knee-deep without a plea,"

The soft leather brushed against my skin but it wasn't the same. I could still remember the way it felt when he held me while wearing it...

"I don't want to know what it's like to live without you,"

Why?! Why had this happened?! Why was I living without him? Why was I forced to endure this kind of pain, this agony?

"Don't want to know the other side of a world without you,"

I didn't ever want to live a life without him. But it was too late to go back - I was already living the other side of a world without Dean Winchester in it. And it shattered every piece of my beating heart.