𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟐𝟎
𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐈𝐦 𝐒𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲

Aurora lay on her back, hands on her stomach as she thought. It had been two days since finding the letters from her mother and questions were spiralling in her mind. She didn't tell anybody about what she had found.

There was a knock on the door and she sat up slightly. Finn peered into the room and flashed her a smile. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah." She replied. Aurora moved over to allow him to sit beside her before leaning her head on his shoulder. Finn looked down at her. "Is there something bothering you? It's just— the other day at the pub and.. you've been a bit quiet lately, y'know?"

She hummed and he stopped rambling. Aurora sat up. "I have something to tell you."

His eyes went wide with panic. She almost laughed at him. "But you can't tell anyone that i've told you—" she held her pink finger out, "pinky promise me that you won't."

Finn looked down at her hand before interlocking his pinky around hers. "I promise."

Aurora leaned down and pulled the box from under her bed. He sat up straight and watched her take the lid from it and take out a handful of letters. "What's this?" He furrowed his brows.

Aurora looked at him. "They're from my mum."

Finn picked one up and scanned his eyes over it. "Where did you get them?"

"In Polly's fucking candle box. She's been keeping them from me." Aurora scoffed, leaning her back against the wall. Finn shook his head in confusion. "There's at least.. twenty here. Why would Polly hide them from you?"

Rory shrugged.

He placed them all neatly back in the box and closed the box. "And.. what do you think about the letters— did you read any?"

"I hate her." She hissed. "How can she write to me, to Polly— about me, after just... abandoning me and Freddie. What kinda mother is that?" She flung her arms up into the air.

Finn thought for a moment. He could try and make her see the positive side or just agree with her. Neither of which were particularly good options. "Maybe she regrets it.. or maybe there's more to it than you think." He said.

She almost snapped at him but didn't because she knew he was right. "I hate her.." she whispered again, pressing her palms into her eyes angrily.

Finn grabbed her hand. "Listen— you don't know how long ago they were written.." he tried to say, "they could be from ages ago." He shrugged. Aurora glared at him. "She wrote of Freddie's death. I don't think they're that old, Finn." She huffed and threw her head back in frustration. Finn chewed on his bottom lip.

He didn't know what to say to her.

-

Aurora walked through the grass, the sky hanging dark above her. She hugged her arms around herself as the wind nipped at her skin. She stopped at Freddie's gravestone and looked down at it. She sighed and sat down.

"Hi Freddie." She spoke. "You probably aren't too happy to see me, hm?" She joked, laughing slightly. Aurora played with the hem of her cardigan. "I found some letters that mum wrote to Polly.. about me." She began, "I don't know how to feel about it." But of course, she just got silence. Who was she kidding? A dead soul could not speak back.

Aurora scoffed. "God— this is so stupid." She shook her head. "I don't know why I came here in the first place."

Aurora was tempted to stand and walk away but something stopped her. She stared at the engraved letters on the dark stone. "I think a part of me does miss you Freddie. I'll never admit it to anybody but I think it's true." She spoke. "It's weird.. y'know, the way people can just leave you. One moment they're there and then the next— they're not."

The wind whistled harshly as if it was some sort of response from him.

"Karl has grown quite a bit. You'd be proud." She smiled to herself. "And i've almost finished school. I like to think you'd be happy for me.." she paused, "i'm off the drugs now too. And—" she took a breath, "i didn't think i'd be able to do that. I thought i'd die from it."

Aurora found herself tearing up. "I wish you were here Freddie. I wish we could've gotten along. Because— now I have no one really. I have the Shelby's, yeah. But... that's different. They aren't blood. And even though we hated each other, you were still my brother. And I wish things had gone differently. I'm glad I told you that I loved you before you passed.." she ranted. Aurora stood and wiped her nose. "Goodnight, Freddie." She said quickly, wanting to get home, "I love you."

-

Aurora stood by the car as John and Arthur spoke with a few men. Finn stood with Isiah and watched Rory from a distance. "Have some English tea, go on." John taunted, tilting his cap over his eyes.

"We don't want fucking tea!" The man fired back. He then looked at Rory strangely and she shifted uncomfortably and looked away. "We want an explanation."

"Well, i'll have fucking tea." Arthur leaned forward and took the teapot.

"Explanation for what?" John sighed. "The little Venice restaurant on Forbes Street was burnt down—" the man began. "No, no couldn't have been us. We were at a wedding." John interrupted harshly. "You burnt it to the ground to stop my son being at the same wedding." He continued.

"He wasn't missed." Arthur grumbled.

John began laughing.

"You are such big boys now but once you borrowed clothes from us to look like men." The man was Italian, clearly. Aurora was watching him with caution. "How's the tea Arthur—" John hummed and Arthur chucked the remains to the floor. "Cold." He answered.

"Please tell Tommy that we pay him whatever he asks us to pay. We stay out of the city and off the tracks— but you tell him from me.. that my son will walk with any woman in this city— any woman he chooses. Even if that woman works for the emperor Tommy Shelby. My son is in love—"

John began laughing again and he looked down. "Sorry— sorry.. do excuse me. Carry on."

"If he wishes, he will walk with the woman he loves."

"Okay." John sniffed before leaning forward, "you know, it'll be hard for your son to walk anywhere with a bullet in each knee, wouldn't?" Everything fell silent. Arthur looked at John and said nothing. Aurora shifted her weight from one foot to another and her mouth fell open.

Finn looked at Isiah and Isiah winced.

"Too much.. you said too much. Sabini says suck and swallow but no.. too much. I spit." He then spat and began speaking Italian before smashing up one of the chairs.

John sipped his tea and began laughing.

"Isiah, put two extra men on our pubs in Nechells." Arthur instructed. John looked around with confusion. "What are you talking about, Arthur? We aren't scared of fucking eye-ties anymore." He huffed. Aurora walked forward slightly to stand beside Finn. "Don't tell Tommy about the chair and clean this fucking shit up." Arthur huffed and walked to the car.

"We aren't scared of fucking wops!" John shouted.

Aurora touched his arm to try and calm him and they watched Arthur walk off. "Arthur!" John tried. Aurora bit down on the inside of her cheek and winced. "Oh, John." She said. "What have you done?"

-

Finn and Rory sat in the den, both watching John and Polly through the window of the office. "Who was it— the man from today?" She asked quietly. Finn hummed, "Vincent Changretta. His son was supposed to join Lizzie at Tommy's wedding but.."

"Oh—" Aurora whispered. They watched John stand and shove everything off the table, a shout leaving his mouth. "This isn't going to end well, is it?" She asked Finn. He shook his head slowly and they watched John turn toward the door. "I'll take his fucking face, how about that?" He shouted, slamming it behind them

The pair turned away quickly and John stormed down the hallway.

"John— John!" Aurora rushed, practically jumping from her chair. "John, wait!"

He stopped abruptly at the front door and turned toward her. He watched her almost trip over the chair closest to her and grab onto the wall for support. With raised eyebrows, he shoved his hands into his pockets.

"Listen— I don't know what the fuck has happened today but.. please be careful." She swallowed hard, looking at him with pure seriousness. "I can't lose you. None of us can lose you, alright?"

John breathed through his nose. "Yeah." Was all he said before turning and leaving.

She stood, a slight feeling of defeat washing over her. At least she tried. Finn leaned over the table to look at her but she had her back facing him. The door closed behind John and a sigh left her mouth.

"He's a big boy now—" Finn tried to begin a joke.

"Shut up Finn." Rory quickly cut him off.

-

Aurora sat at the table, opposite Arthur. John slowly walked in, hands clasped before him. He looked guilty and was preparing himself for a scolding. Finn was behind him. "Alright, Finn. Thanks for coming— fuck off." Arthur grumbled.

Aurora snapped her head toward him. "Arthur—" she scoffed.

Before she could continue, Tommy appeared behind her. "Finn, you can stay." He said. Finn leaned against the wall. "Sit down John— sit down." Tommy ordered. John and Rory shared a glance as he sat beside her and she pursed her lips into a line, knowing what was coming.

"John, you cut Angel Changretta." Tommy began. "You did what?!" Aurora interrupted. John looked down and Tommy cleared his throat. "Even though Arthur told you to apologise and Polly told you to compromise. You chose not to listen to mr apologise or mrs compromise and now i've got an Italian walking round my back yard saying he's going to kill my brother. So what do we do, John? Do we apologise or do we compromise?"

"Jesus christ.." Aurora pinched the bridge of her nose. John stared at the table.

"Oh it was just something John said as a joke." Arthur. Aurora looked up. "Yeah but he's your brother as well, Arthur." Tommy reminded. "Yeah.. I didn't want to start a war over something John said without meaning it." Arthur added.

Tommy looked between the two.

"Well— it's happened now, hasn't it." Rory reminded them.

"So should he apologise in Italian or in English— or should we ask them which fucking language they would prefer. I'm not clear." Tommy hissed. Polly leaned forward. "You said whilst this business was going on in London you wanted peace at home."

"And the only way to guarantee peace is by making the prospect of war seem hopeless. If you apologise once you do it again and again and again like taking bricks out the fucking walls of your house. Do you want to bring the house down Arthur?" Tommy asked. Arthur shook his head. Aurora held in her laughs after locking eyes with Finn. "If you're soft on rebellion it'll grow."

"Bloody soft on rebellion." Arthur scoffed.

Aurora glanced at John who had a certain look in his eyes. She placed a reassuring hand on his arm and tutted quietly. He felt he had made the biggest mistake in the world — that Tommy hated him for it.. that they all did. He felt like a child again.. the same child that would get scolded by their father and meet with his hand colliding with his cheek.

John looked down at Rory and she offered him a light smile.

"You do the right thing John. Now we go on the offensive— take two of the Changretta pubs. We take them tonight. That's it." Tommy began walking away.

"Oh, for christ's sake, why?" Polly sighed.

Tommy spun around. "Eh?" He shouted. "Why?" Polly asked again. "Why? Because we fucking can! And if we can, we do! If we lift our heel off their necks now they'll just come at us. Remember these are the bastards that wanted Danny Whizzbang dead." He looked to Arthur, "you're getting soft brother. Soft and weak. Save the bibles for Sunday, eh? Finn.. i need to get to Hockley and home. It's been a long day."

Finn nodded and began walking away. Aurora got up and patted John's shoulder before following after Finn. He slowed down for her to catch up.

They didn't say anything. Just shared a look of cautiousness.