The next time I woke up, I was not in a box that sent me straight into the unknown. But I was lying on a bed, at least that's what it had to be.

My head wasn't throbbing as much as the last time I felt this pain, but it was still present. I propped myself up with my hands and could now see exactly where I was. It was a kind of hut, one of those I had seen outside. A blanket that had slipped when I stood up was lying on top of me, giving me warmth.

I flung it back and swung my legs over the bed. As I vaguely recalled what happened, just at the thought alone, I grabbed my head and was surprised to find that there was a large plaster stuck over the wound.

Slowly I dropped my hand and stood up cautiously, but before I could even take a step forward, the door opened and three boys entered the room, including Alby, the only one I had met so far.

"She's awake," one of them stated. He looked young; I personally would guess him to be fourteen, but again, I didn't even have a clue how old I was. The boy had dark hair and ice-blue eyes, which were not easy to forget.

"How are you feeling?" Alby folded his arms in front of his chest.

Overwhelmed with the situation, I let myself sink back onto the bed, my hands nervously finding their way to my lap. Under the boys' gaze, I felt uncomfortable.

"I'm fine," I breathed softly, my voice lost in my uncertainty.

I lifted my head and noticed some dark strands falling into my face, blocking my view for a brief moment. I quickly brushed them back and looked at Alby, who returned my gaze.

It was uncomfortably quiet for a while; the three boys looked at me, not saying a word. I wanted to know what was going on.

One of the boys, standing in the middle, cleared his throat. My eyes flicked to him and took a closer look. He was tall, had light hair that almost looked red in the light and was wearing a white top. There was a slight smile on his face.

"Sorry, we're not used to having a girl here with us," he said, scratching the back of his neck. "I'm Newt. And this here is Alfred." He pointed to the young one next to him, who smiled at me.

I tried to return it but all I got out was a nod.

"I'm the only girl?" That explained why I had only been surrounded by fifty teenage boys earlier, all of whom had stared at me with wide eyes.

Alby nodded immediately as he slowly slid onto one of the chairs that were here in the room.

"Yeah." He shook his head thoughtfully before turning to me and leaning forward. "Listen, this is all quite a lot for today. You should get some rest, you took quite a beating."

He stood up, I did the same. "Wait!" Alby looked perplexed as he turned and raised his eyebrows.

"You can't just leave without telling me where I am and who the hell you are!" I tried to calm down, but the fact that these guys were going to make me wait a night to tell them what was happening, where I was and why I couldn't remember a damn thing was absolute bullshit.

Newt, who had just introduced himself, held out his hands and gestured for me to calm down. "You can ask us anything you want tomorrow. You'll be safe here; Alfred our former Greenie will show you around."

He put his hand on Alfred's shoulder, who nodded in agreement. "Exactly! Soon you'll understand everything. I felt exactly the same way as you a month ago. We all felt that way," he explained calmly.

I shook my head, closed my eyes and breathed in and out deeply. "We're trapped here, aren't we?" I opened my eyes and looked at the boys. I felt my hands start to shake. It was a horrible feeling.

"I don't think she understood about the questions," Alfred whispered, to Newt. I couldn't help but roll my eyes and get up again to walk towards the door, even though I had absolutely zero idea what I was about to do.

"No, no. I understand perfectly well, Alfred. I have a good right to know what situation I've been thrown into by complete strangers!"

Alby shook his head with a sigh.

"We're more or less locked in here, yes, but maybe not for long. We call this place the Glade and ourselves Glader. You'll get the rest tomorrow on the tour. Until then, stay calm." Alby walked past me and opened the door before nodding to Newt and disappearing.

I blinked a few times, trying to process his words quickly. But I couldn't.

Newt cleared his throat and stroked the back of his neck. "Are you hungry?"

I shrugged and looked at the two boys in front of me.

"Not really, but anything's better than spending all my time in here."

Alfred clapped his hands together. "Great! I'll go tell Fry," he said, but by then he had disappeared through the door.

I didn't think twice, turned around and followed the boy outside. It was relatively quick, there I stood on the lawn and now had a direct view of the walls ━ rather, the big opening, the only opening.

I walked towards it like an attractive magnet, ignoring the glances of some of the boys. This opening...was it a way out? Why the hell did everyone live here instead of going out there.

Every step I took, every breath I took, it still didn't feel real. The only thing that convinced me I wasn't dreaming was my pain and the sun, which left an unpleasant warmth on my skin.

Only a few metres separated me and this opening; my eyes widened as I looked up ━ These walls were even bigger up close and as I looked into this exit my breath caught. All I could see was a straight path that immediately stopped and split into two directions. What the hell was that?

"Hey!"

I flinched as a loud voice rang out. Turning to face the person, I realised it was another boy I hadn't known until now.

"What do you think you're doing, Greenie?" He stopped immediately in front of me and put his hands on his hips.

I had to lift my head to look at him. The boy was tall, definitely taller than the rest of the boys I'd encountered so far. He was wearing a dark sweatshirt and light-coloured trousers, while his dirty blond hair, which almost looked dark brown, lay tangled on his head. His eyes pierced me and an intimidating aura surrounded his body.

Confused, I blinked and glanced at the opening before looking back at the boy.

"W-what?"

He rolled his eyes and snorted.

"You're not supposed to be here," he merely said.

My head shook from side to side as I, as if of my own accord, took a step back.

"No, I...I wasn't planning on running in there," I clarified, closing my hands into fists as I noticed more and more boys gathering around us. My gaze passed nervously through the crowd, my eyes meeting Alfred's as the younger boy ran to us.

"Gally, what's wrong?" He arrived at us out of breath and stood beside me.

"Nothing. Just wanted to make sure our lady, knew it wasn't allowed to just walk in there blind," he explained, his eyes not leaving me for a second. "Unless she has a death wish."

I furrowed my eyebrows, my lips pressed into a thin line. My patience was wearing thin until I had none left.

"You know what, Gally, I might have even walked in there just now because none of you idiots will tell me where the fuck I am and why I can't remember anything!" I shouted angrily, feeling my lips and chin start to quiver. So either I was going to burst into tears any second, or scream at someone.

"Woah, language! What's going on?" 

Newt came to a stop by Gally and looked at me out of worried eyes. I turned away for a moment and took a shaky deep breath in and out, although that didn't help at all, because if I had to speak again at the latest, I would burst into tears like a baby, in front of all the boys.

"I just want answers," I breathed softly and felt my eyes getting wet. I closed them and tried to calm myself.

Alfred, who was a little shorter than me, put his hand on my shoulder and stepped more towards me so that I could see his face. "And you will get them. Tomorrow. I promise."

I heard one of the boys sigh behind me, but couldn't yet tell if it was Gally or Newt.

"Come on, Greenie, we were going to eat, right?"

I turned to Newt and met his gentle smile. My gaze jerked to Gally, who was now looking at me less with hatred and more with regret. But what did I know? I didn't even know why I was here, let alone my name.

I finally nodded and followed Newt, but we didn't get far, as there was a loud noise, so loud that I covered my ears in panic and turned towards the opening. The walls to the right and left moved slowly towards each other, while suddenly a heavy gust of wind hit us all. My hair flew wildly around my face while the clothes on my body rose and fell briefly.

And then I saw it.

Two boys ran out of the place, which was behind the walls, into the Glade. The one in front caught my eye first; Slightly, still intimidated I lowered my arms as one of the two boys stopped at Newt, making him even closer to me. As a final loud noise rang out, I turned my head again to the walls, which were now completely closed; My mouth however, was still wide open.

"A girl?"

The Asian boy who stood in front of me and Newt looked at me out of big dark eyes. His black hair lay perfectly on top of his head, as if he had glued it there. He was wearing a light blue shirt, over which he wore armour.

"She's our greenie. And...a girl," Newt introduced me.

"No shit," he marvelled. "Seems like we got some female company," the boy laughed, holding out his hand to me. "Minho."

I stared at his hand for a long time before deciding to gently put mine in it. He grinned as he shook it. His hands were rough and yet partly soft. But the warmth he radiated was even more remarkable.

"Uhm..." I bit my lips hard when I couldn't say anything back. No matter how much I wanted it, no matter how much my body wanted it ━ My head had completely different plans.

It was so incredibly frustrating. It was like something was on the tip of your tongue, you could almost say it, but no matter how much I wanted to remember it, I couldn't.

"It's okay, Lady Shank, we all took a while."

I removed my hand from his and looked at Newt in confusion. "Lady Shank? Greenie? Is that your secret language or can't I even remember my own language?"

Minho laughed, causing his eyes to narrow and little lines to form on his eyes.

I bit my lip to keep from smiling too; It was too contagious. But I didn't want to laugh. There was nothing funny about this situation.

"It's some kind of slang, we're using."

I formed my mouth into an 'O' and nodded in understanding. Made sense.

"Man, I'm hungry," Minho whined, stretching.

"Well, since you were here later than usual today anyway, you arrived perfectly for dinner," Newt said. I noticed he had a strong British accent, which made me grin inwardly. It sounded beautiful and suddenly it felt like I'd heard it somewhere before. Like I'd had the exact same thoughts before.

"Let's put it this way...there were some complications when it came to communication." Minho shrugged and now walked away.

Newt sighed and ran off too, thus forcing me to run along quickly. My tongue was burning to know why those walls were closing. Would they open again?

"You wanna ask somethin'." Astonished, I turned to Newt, who looked at me knowingly, a slight smirk on his lips.

"Can you blame me?"

He shook his head.

"Of course I can't. But save your curiosity for tomorrow, Alby's not much of a nosy type, like you."

"Are those walls opening up again? And why were Minho and that other boy inside, I thought no one was supposed to run in there?"

Newt stopped abruptly, I did the same.

"Really, I'm being serious. Save your questions for tomorrow. You'll get a detailed tour and if you still have questions afterwards, you can ask anything that's on your mind. But now," He gently slid his hand up my back and pushed me in the direction where many of the boys were sitting and eating. "Now we eat."

He led me to a picnic table where Alfred sat, poking at his food.

"I'll be right back," Newt said and walked away. I sighed and settled down on the bench where Alfred was sitting. As soon as he spotted me his eyes lit up and a smile crept onto his lips. I had a feeling he hadn't been as happy before as I found him now in front of me.

"Hey!"

I smiled. "Hello."

"How are you feeling?"

I shrugged and let my gaze wander over the large square. One or two boys were still working, at least it looked that way, while others were gathering in groups and eating. This place, was like a small community surrounded by a wall...was it a prison?

"I don't know." A sigh came over my lips as I put my arms on the table in front of me. I was only wearing a black t-shirt so I could now look down at my exposed arms.

"That's okay. Once you've had your tour and you can remember your name again, you'll be able to settle in here."

I looked at two scars on my arm, which had already faded to white. They were two very thin lines that were completely independent of each other on my forearm. One was longer and adorned my arm horizontally, while the other was much shorter and almost looked like a scratch. Lost in thought, I stroked it.

"I don't think I can get used to all this so easily," I admitted.

"Why not?" Alfred returned, popping his spoon with the food on it into his mouth. "It's not like you could remember anything else you're used to."

I lifted my head. He was right in a way, but admitting it so openly hurt me somehow, even if there was no reason to. Obviously everyone is going through this process.

"I guess you're right," I muttered in reply and looked at Newt, who was holding two bowls in his hands with Minho in tow.

"Here, got you some food." Newt put the bowl down in front of me and sat down next to me, while Minho took a seat across from me.

"Thank you," I breathed and picked up the spoon, which was next to me.

It looked like a stew and even though I really wasn't hungry, I silently forced myself to stuff a spoonful into my mouth little by little. The boys were talking about where I could stay and after a while Alby joined them.

"We could let her sleep in the Homestead for the time being and tomorrow we'll prepare something for her," Newt suggested, pointing at me with his spoon.

I lifted my gaze and looked past Minho to the sleeping quarters, which could be seen openly from here.

"Why should I sleep with you? What about the places out here?" I hated my voice. I hated how weak it sounded.

Alby cleared his throat uncomfortably and leaned forward a little. He sat next to Minho and was able to maintain eye contact much better that way.

"Let's just say I don't want to leave you out there with all those boys...some of them are very-," he tried to find the perfect words, but I seemed to understand.

"I understand," I said, smiling softly. "Thank you. That's really thoughtful of you."

Minho grinned. "Only the best for our  Lady Shank."

Amused, I shook my head as I picked up my bowl. "Where's the kitchen?"

Newt pointed his finger at a place a little way away.

I nodded and grabbed my bowl before walking to the kitchen.
Even if I wanted to, I couldn't for the life of me ignore all those stares. The feeling of those boys' prying eyes piercing me made me feel even more uncomfortable than I already was.

Arriving at the kitchen, a dark-skinned, tall boy was standing at a board, just washing it with some water.

"Uhm, hey."

The boy startled and dropped the board. "Dude, don't sneak up on me like that."

He raised his eyes and faltered. "No Dude."

I laughed and shook my head. "No, not really."

"Sorry. I'm always just surrounded by all my boys, it's strange to get used to a girl."

Waving it off, I raised my hand. "It's okay, I get it. You must be Frypan, right?"

"Yep. The one and only. You certainly won't find a better cook here than me."

I laughed again and set the bowl down on the table. I took an instant liking to Frypan. He was kind, and very caring.

His eyes fell on my half-full bowl. "Didn't you like it?"

"Yes, of course I did. I'm not very hungry though," I confessed.

"Oh, okay."

He took the bowl and put the rest back in the big pot. I looked around here a bit and spotted lots of vegetables. It looked like they were growing it themselves, at least because of all the soil that was still attached to it. Once again, many questions gathered in my head, but I forced myself not to chew them out. I would rather wait until tomorrow. I could hardly wait to ask the questions that had been on my tongue for hours.

I said a quick goodbye to Frypan before walking back to the boys. It was getting dark and I wanted to rest. My first day here had been a nightmare and my head still hurt a lot.

"Could you maybe show me where I'm supposed to stay?"

The boys' conversation fell silent. Newt nodded immediately and jumped up from the bench.

"Of course. Come on."

I followed him.

We walked to a building that was a little further away from the other sleeping places. "Why are you sleeping separately from the others?"

Newt turned his head gently towards me. "This is where the Keepers sleep."

"Keepers?"

As we ran up the stairs, Newt stopped at the base of the stairs. "The Leaders."

Understanding, I nodded.

"Alright, we've decided you'll sleep at Minho's for now," he said, opening a door and stepping into the room. Curious, I did the same and listened carefully to what he said. "He is a Runner. He leaves early in the morning and also, as you saw, comes back relatively late. So there shouldn't be any problems. He's not that particular about his privacy."

"And he's okay with that? I don't want to put anyone in an awkward position."

"He's fine with it and since it's only for one night anyway, there's no problem."

I looked around the room where there was only a homemade cot, with bedding on it, a chest of drawers and otherwise a lot of boxes and a...mirror? Where did they get a mirror?

"Just give us a sec, we'll bring something up for you to sleep in."

I raised my eyebrows and nodded gratefully. "Thank you."

Newt nodded at me and was about to leave when he stopped again and gently put his hand on my shoulder. "Everything's gonna be okay."

I didn't believe him and I was almost sure he didn't even believe himself. He left the room and closed the door, leaving me completely alone in a completely strange room.

My legs carried me almost by themselves to the mirror, which sounded so tempting at that moment. I had the feeling that I was aware of how I looked, but at the moment I had simply forgotten.

The moment I stood in front of the mirror was the moment my eyes almost instantly began to fill with tears. Pale. I was so incredibly pale that I was afraid it wasn't healthy. My dark circles were so present that I could already resemble a dead person. My long dark brown hair had knotted several times, was completely broken.

Meanwhile, the patch on my forehead had unravelled a little at the sides, so that it lay loose in the air in some places. Shakily, I raised my right arm; slowly, I pulled the patch from my wound with my fingers. I hissed as it stuck to it and now pulled at my skin as I tore the piece off completely.

Wide-eyed and breathing heavily, I looked at the wound. It was a spot on my head that had burst open. It was bright red and a few purple and blue marks adorned it. I stroked it carefully and let a tear run down my face as I wondered where it had come from.

I wanted to know so badly, I could hardly breathe. Did I have a family? Did they miss me right now?

Averting my eyes I looked down at my hands. They were so delicate and small...had I done something bad with them and all this was punishment for it?

I tore my gaze away and slowly let myself slide down as more and more tears gathered in my eyes. I felt so empty and so damn lonely. A loud sob escaped my throat as I buried my head and cried silently to myself.

I cried until there was a knock on the door. I stood up, wiped my tears away and forced myself to walk towards the door and open it.

Maybe it's gonna be harder, than I thought.

__

the first chapter is quite long, almost 4k words !

your opinion up to here? feedback, comments and votes would help me a lot to motivate myself!