III. 1919

TW | sexual assault

Vivian stumbled down the street, clutching her sleeves, pulling them down. She didn't know what time it was but she was sure the sun would rise very soon. She had a sharp headache and she kept leaning to them right causing her to stagger into the wall a few times. She had drunk way too much, and accidentally fallen asleep for an hour or so, which was the reason she was heading to the stables instead of home. It would be hard to make excuses when she could barely form sentences.

She walked around the corner, seeing the yard in the distance. As she walked on, it felt the yard was moving away from her and her vision began to blur. She groaned when she tripped over a curb. She watched her feet as she stumbled along. She was a mess.

She rubbed her eyes, before pulling out her pocket watch, three forty-five. She needed sleep, and a cup of tea, maybe a scone.

She snapped out of her thoughts when she ran her head into the gate, causing her to groan in pain. Vivian rubbed her head, hissing in agony after applying to much pressure. She had rammed her head into the wall near the gate. The crimson colour stained her finger tips, she sighed in annoyance, wanting, desperately, to escape the aftermath of alcohol as well as drugs and now this.

She pushing the gate open and sliding through the gap. She made her way to the stables, tripping over loose materials. She walked through, heading to the back, where no horse resided in. The smell was oddly comforting. She held her coat around herself, as she slid down the wall between the back wall and a bale of hay.

The silence was so loud. Her breathing felt as if it was quickening and it felt as if someone was poking her head constantly. She knew her head wasn't damaged badly or at all, it was just a little blood, a graze. She held her head, to keep it from swaying. She tried to lull herself to sleep, humming a tune that was stuck in her head for as long as she could remember.

"Get off the ground, you'll catch your death"

The voice hissed. It had been weeks since she heard her. She tried to open her eyes to see her or move but her eyes were to sore and her limbs ached. She gave up, "You're one to talk, jumping into the cut an' leaving your family." She whispered back, as she didn't have the will to speak louder.

"You need to take care of yourself, look at the state of you. You need to go home, clean up and sleep in your bed." She spoke to her, quietly, ignoring her statement

"I'm fine right here, with the horses." She whispered softly to her mum, continuing to hum her little tune.

She didn't reply, but she hummed along with Vivian. The woman would visit on occasions, at night, just before she drifted into a deep slumber. Whether she spoke of her youth or told her stories of the Shelby children. Or sing to her as she dozed off. Vivian was sure she was making it all up in her head, but she didn't care. It was comforting.

She thought that one day she would stop visiting, yet after years, she still visited. When she was younger, before the war, she used to stay awake, waiting to see if her mother would come see her but it was only when she least expected, so she stopped waiting and treasured the moments her soft voice would fill the silent room.

"My little dove" she heard before she fell into a dreamless sleep.

It felt as if she slept for two minutes, feeling the need to sleep longer but she had to get up. She knew her brothers were gone to the fair, leaving her behind, assholes. She didn't know the time and feared they'd be back before she was. She doubted they checked on her. One of them would be slowing the lot down, so they wouldn't have time to make sure she was home.

She pulled herself up, gripping onto the bale of hay beside her. She groaned loudly as she did so, earning the attention of Curley, who seemed to be close by.

"Vin? What are you doing?" He questioned, turning the corner to see the Shelby girl leaning her back on the wall, while fixing her jacket. "Are you alright"

"Just fell asleep." She spoke, a small smile appearing on her face, a sign of reassurance to the concerned man. He gave a small smile back, looking back for any sign of Charlie around.

"Will I get Charlie, Vin?" He asked as she pushed the hair out of her face, tying it up.

"No, I'm good, 'ave to get home." She spoke, "Tell Uncle Charlie I say hi." She spoke walking past him, which he followed before she left. Vivian heard her uncle call Charlie as she slipped out the gate. She walked out on the street.

She stumbled along the same path she did last night. But this time she heard shouts from men and cries of children, whistles blowing.

She turned onto Waterly Lane seeing coppers dragging men out of their house. Women were comforting their upset children. She watched, wide-eyed and confused. She walked faster, getting home quickly. As she ran to number 29, pasting the distressed families.

None of the coppers came near the Shelby household, which confused the girl but she ignored it. She knew someone would bring it up. She slammed the door open, "Aunt Pol, Ada!" Vivian shouted through the house. No answer. "You better fucking answer me if you are here." No answer again. She stood there, no knowing what to do.

Polly would be at the church, so she is fine, and her sister would usually sleep in. She made her way upstairs checking in case either were home and were asleep or something. No one.

As she came back downstairs and into the living room, she gazed out the window, seeing the men being pinned against the walls of their homes and beaten in front of their loved ones. Since when didn't they do shit like this. She wondered the reason behind it, thinking of the new copper and the meeting.

"To clean up the city" She remembered. Since when did that mean beating men in front of their loved ones. She thought about others she knew who'd be in this situation right now. Ryan and Kol, Isaiah and his dad, Scott and his sisters and mum, Polly and Ada.

Vivian thought about her sister, where she would be. Usually at this time, she'd be at the market or the shops or at home. Then it hit her. The boys were away for the day, no watching eyes, no questions, perfect time to sneak away to a man. Freddie fucking Thorne.

She knew Waterly Lane wasn't the only street being raid, due to the fact she heard the racket from all over. She knew Freddie was a known communist, causing trouble in the factories, so the coppers would take him away, easy and if Ada was with him, word would get around fast, to locals, to coppers, to the peaky blinders, and worst, to the Shelby brothers.

She could just go to Freddie's, but Vivian knew the raid started before she awoke so she would have the common sense to hide somewhere else, right?

She walked into the kitchen hoping she was right. She decided to make herself a cup of tea. Just as she was heating the tea pot, the door opened. Based of the footsteps and the silence she knew it wasn't the coppers, and Polly couldn't careless about making noise in her own house, it was Ada.

"Want some tea?" She called out as she waited for the water to boil. She heard her sister stomp into the kitchen.

"Where's Aunt Pol?" Ada asked, as she walked over beside her sister, watching her as she waited. Vivian took note of Ada's creased stockings under the waistcoat. Her hair was just as bad as Vivian, apart from the lack of hay tangled in it.

"Tea or not?" She still didn't turn to her as she ignored her.

"Fine, where's Pol?" She hissed back. The sisters stood in silence as Ada waited for an answer. Ada sighed as she stepped away from her sister, getting two tea cups.

Vivian poured the water out with the tea, "Church, maybe." She finally answered. Ada nodded to herself, listening to the sound of the spoon hitting the cup. The two girls were a mess. If anyone walked in, they'd have questions.

"What you doing today?" Her sister asked as they sat down together.

"Don't know, maybe sleep. You?" She sipped her tea.

"No clue."

The two sister enjoyed each other's small talk as they sipped their tea. Neither spoke of the other's appearance or whereabouts, both knowing to not talk of it. Vivian didn't bring up the Throne man, knowing her sister deserved some sort of privacy and secrecy.

Ada soon went to bed and it was just Vivian left in the kitchen. Vivian finished her tea and ended up falling asleep at the table.

"Pol?" The boys were home. Voices called out through the house, and the heavy feet made their way through the house. The boys came in, scanning the room until they landed on their sister.

"Pol's not here." The girl groaned, lifting her head. Finn was smirking at her appearance as the Arthur and John were looking at the space behind her.

"I'm here." Vivian's head snapped up hearing the voice behind her.

"Have you been there the whole time." As she stared at her aunt who took a drag from her cigarette.

"Yeah, you were asleep when I got here, 'bout an hour." She spoke to her niece, "Now, get the boys in here, go."

"Boys, in here, now!" Vivian shouted, earring a smack across the head. She hit her head against the table as she rested again and only raised it when the men entered.

She saw Tom giving a look, not at Vivian but at Pol. Vivian wondered what the look was. She had so many questions. All the men were in the kitchen waiting for someone to speak. They started getting beers, still waiting for actually answers. "Wha-"

"Arthur'd agreed to it when he was arrested. They said the peaky blinders had cleared out to the fair to let them do it." Polly interrupted John, who was about to ask another stupid question.

"I never said nothin' to that copper about smashing up bloody houses." Arthur ranted.

"All right. Which pubs did they do?"

"The Guns, the Chain, the Marquis, the Golden-"

"So basically all the ones the blinders protect," Vivian cut in, all eyes went to her but she didn't take notice as she stared blankly at the table, "except the Garrison." There was a short silence before Polly went on again.

"Make sure people think we were in on it. He's smart, this copper... So, go on. Drink your beers, get out. You'd better show people you are still the cocks of the walk." Polly spoke loudly.

"Hand out some cash to the landlords of the pubs. Pay some veterans to fix the places up."Tom spoke as everyone left.

"So what about you, Tommy?" Arthur questioned, looking down about something.

"I've to go to Charlies to stable the horse. She looked footsore in the box." Tom answered, getting a cigarette.

"Let them see your faces." Polly called out to the boys, as she shut the door. "Vivian, out"

"But, I was here first." She looked up for the first time in a while. Her aunt gave her a look before she turned to her brother but he gave her the same look.

She was sick and tired of having to find out things on her own. The one thing she knew was that Tommy knew something. Tom trusts Polly the most, more than all us, and they were both the minds of the business, so everyone trusts them.

—

The youngest Shelby was walking down the lane, collecting pictures of the King with his sister. What kind of fucking plan is this, Vivian thought to herself. Thomas was going mad. The two made their way to the Garrison, Finn jogging ahead of her. She had her cold hands shoved in her pockets. She wore a pair of grey trousers with a white shirt. Her cheeks were rosy red and her brunette locks that blew around in the Birmingham breeze, getting in her face as she continued to follow her brother.

It felt nice stepping into the warm pub. She grabbed a chair, helping Finn get up and walk along the counter grabbing the picture. "Finn, lad? What are you doin'?" Harry asked, as Finn leaped of the counter. "We're havin' a fire, Harry." Vivian responded, heading toward the door, following her young brother. Finn ran towards Waterly Lane while Vivian took her time. She had lost Finn but she knew he was going to the fire.

"Hello Vi, gettin' into any trouble?" Scudboat joked as she walked down the lane, "No yet, but I'll let you know Scud." She laughed. When she was younger Scud would alway be the victims in her little jokes, and there were occasions when she would get in a fight and Scud would fix her up, when she got badly hurt. But that's was only when she had snuck out to the horses while her family were unaware.

He had grown familiar with the sound of a little knock at his door in the early hours in the morning, but he always answered and helped her out, no matter who was home. When the boys went to war, she grew up and she stopped knocking for help when he came back.

She looked ahead at the fire, surrounded by blinders. She saw Finn and then John and then Arthur and Tommy. " 'Ello sister" Arthur called out, seeing Vivian approach. The five siblings stood at the fire, watching the picture burn and the whiskey spark the flames. She warmed up by the fire. "I hope to God you know what you're doing." Arthur mumbled to Tom.

John handed her a flask, "Go on then," he gestured to the fire, "won't say a thing" She took the metal flask from him took a swing, feeling the familiar burn in her throat. She looked at her three brothers realising one was missing. Tom got stood at the other side of the fire. He was talking to a man with glasses with circle frames and a round hat, "who's that?" She asked, her voice rasped out. Her brother who stood next to here. "Don't know, Tommy stuff." Arthur slurred. John reached for the flask but she held it away, looking at the interaction between Tommy and whoever this is, he looked like a William.

She walked through the crowd, but not before she heard John's protests about the stolen flask. She planned to hang onto it for a while.

She didn't take her eyes of Tom and William, trying to figure out what they were saying but she couldn't make anything out. She soon heard a cheer as the fire ignited.

"Hey boys!" She shouted into their ears, as she wrapped her arms around their necks. Ryan and Isaiah grinned at her state, laughing.

"God Vivian, the smell off your breath." Ryan turned away from her, as Isaiah laughed, "how much did you drink?" He smirked at her clumsiness.

"Doesn't matter, we need to catch up, gimme that." Isaiah shrugged her arms off him as he snatched her flask

"Hey, it is rude to snatch, you whore ." She glared at him, looking like an angry child. Ryan chuckled at her face, "what you laughing at, Mr. Jones?"

They drunk a little while and laugh around the fire. They had nicked a few bottles and shared it, making Vivian even drunker than the night before. She soon decided to ditch the two and have a wander around. She wobbled through the crowd, looking for her brothers or someone she knew but she didn't.

She got away from the fire and out of the crowd, catching her breath, but was soon lifted up and dragged into an alleyway. She tried to scream but her voice came out as silent whispers. She tried to push or kicked the man away but she couldn't. She was pushed against the wall harshly, and her tangled hair was covering her face. She squeezed her eyes shut. She didn't open her eyes as the man quickly leaned in, kissing her forcefully, ignoring her protest. His hands hold her upper arms, firmly. She had sobered her by now, realising what was happening.

Even when he moved closer and his grip tighten, she kept her eyes closed, wanting this to all be in her head. She tried to wriggle out of his grip, flailing her legs, attempting to kick him. "Stop, please." 'Shelby's don't beg', but she did. She felt helpless as she felt his hands roam her body through her dress and soon travelled under the fabric. She wasn't in control of her body as her legs gave out from under her, but the man held her up.

"No, no please." She whimpered quietly, as he sloppily kissed her neck. He didn't hear her. She shivered at the feeling of his hot breath against her neck. He squeezed her waist tightly before his hand moved down her body, making her gasp in pain. The stench of whiskey filled her nose. She tried not to cry but she still the warm tears rolled down her cheeks. She tried to pull herself together, this wasn't like her to not fight back, she thought. She let out a loud sob as she tried and failed to shuffle out of his grip. Vivian was exhausted.

She thought of all the stories that were burned into women's brains growing up. Her brother's protectiveness to keep her safe and not let it happen to her, her aunt's warnings about it. And now it was going to happen to her.

Vivian felt his grip loosen, "Are you not gonna look at me?" He whispered in her ear, pulling her head closer to his, roughly. His hands trailing up her torso toward her breasts. She froze at the words, at the voice. It was the first time she he had spoken, but she had her the same voice before, but not like this. Usually the voice would bring her great comfort and warmth, but her blood ran cold.

He momentarily loosened his grip, giving her the chance to push him away. Finally meeting the well known brown eyes. She was wide-eyed when she confirmed it was him. Vivian punched him in the chest.

"You fucking bastard." She cried out hitting him over and over again, "Are you that fucking stupid?" He chuckled at her, hold her arms up to keep him from hitting him.

"What's wrong with you? Calm down." Scott said as she tried to get her arms out of his grip, but instead he pulled her arms closer to him, pulling her into his chest, embracing her. She protested but he only chuckled into her neck.

She smelt his breath as he spoke. She wasn't any better but still, she thought she was getting attacked, "Let go of me!" She fought, pushing him away again. Before he came back to her, she spoke again, "Fuck off."

"V, come on. Don't be like that, I haven't seen ya in a while." He slurred, as he leaned against the wall.

"I thought you were some drunk idiot, tryin' to kill me or—." Her voice broke, unable to finish her sentence, looking at his awful state. There was silence between the two for a bit.

His demeanour changed, "You haven't even asked about the raid." He spoke, looking at the ground, as the crowd cheered again. She hadn't even realised that they were close by to the fire as well her brothers, and it would be so easy to get caught. "Me sisters were scarred shitless. Mum didn't know what to do."

She had no idea when the topic of conversation changed, "I'm sorry, I should've." Her voice broke as she apologised. For a moment she thought the whole thing was just in her head, that it never happened.

"How bad was the raid at your end?" He said, standing up straight and walking toward her, "'Cause I heard the Shelby house wasn't touched."  He whispered in her ear before walking out the alley and away from her. She looked to the ground, overwhelmed and confused with what had happened in the past few minutes. What she hadn't registered were the cuts and grazes on her arms from the coarse brick wall and bruises over her torso from his tight grip, her pounding head and the cut on her lip that bleed.

When she got home, no one was there. She ran a bath and sat in the water until it grew cold.

—

    The kitchen was quiet as Polly and Vivian sipped their tea. Polly read the paper while Vivian did the crosswords puzzles. She did half of them on her own and others with the help of her aunt. She didnt know why she bothered with them lately but here she was.

It had been a few weeks since the bonfire and she barely slept a wink. She hadn't spoken to Scott nor had she heard anything of him from Ryan or Isaiah. Vivian had been avoiding him and he seemed he wasn't making an effort of contacting her. The bruises faded slowly and the cuts healed.

The aunt and niece sat in comfortable silence, enjoying each other's company. "Where have you been all day?" Aunt Pol broke the silence as Ada entered the kitchen.

"In bed. Couldn't sleep... then I couldn't wake up. Then I was cold and then I had to go for a wee. Then I was with this bear on a boat but that was just a dream. Then I was hungry." Ada rambled, as she made some food, "Why are you reading the papers? And you- you hate those."

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I've never seen you read the paper. I've only ever seen you light fires with them." Ada said, stuffing her mouth with bread and jam. Polly was talking but Vivian attention was on her sister. She had a whole slice of bread shoved in her mouth. And not to be insensitive but Ada looking a bit different, she couldn't put her finger on why. She hadn't realised that Polly stopped talking. "What?" Ada stared at her sister and aunt.

"Stand up" Pol ordered.

"Why?" Ada asked.

"Just stand up." Her older sister stood up along with her aunt. "Side on" she ordered again. Polly looked her up and down before grabbing her boob, making Vivian burst out laughing, almost choking on her tea.

"Pol-What are you doing?"

"Ada... how late are you?" Vivian stopped laughing. Oh shit, Vivian thought. That's why she looked different and rambled on about god knows what and the jam and bread — Ada hated the sweet kind of jam — but oh shit was this bad. It was Freddie's, wasn't it, it had to be, she would cheat, definitely.

"One week"

"Well thats not bad" Vivian spoke up.

"-Five weeks. Seven if you count weekends. I think it's a lack of iron. I got some tablets."

"But they didn't work" Pol said, to which Ada replied 'no'.

The kitchen was quiet again, but this time it was awkward. The three sat there, thinking, Ada was probably thinking about Freddie and the boys reaction, Polly was probably thinking about the father and Vivian was thinking about five across. A eight letter word for uncomfortable.

'R I G H T N O W'

It fits.

—

NOTES
Chapter three!!! Hope you like it. Happy December. It is shorter than I wanted it to but it doesn't matter. I obviously miss last week's update and I apologise. I've had study and exams. If you want to see some edits and update, go to my TikTok, vvioletneklace.wp
and to listen to some music, there's playlists on Spotify for this book, vvioletneklace.wp
Anyway I hope you had a good week and good night x