I stuff my hands into my pockets. I told my parents I was gonna go for a walk.

It felt weird, their constant worried eyes on me asking if I was okay. I appreciated it, of course. It all felt weird.

I get to the park, happy it was empty. I settle for the bench, inhaling the crisp air and letting my eyes fall closed.

It was calm. I needed this. My mind needed this. To breathe and just be, without lurking eyes or whispers.

But it was cut short as I heard laughter in the distance, making me open my eyes. I didn't need to turn around to know who it belonged to.

I stand up and turn around, the group noticing me but I didn't acknowledge them as I begin to walk away.

"Jisung!" Minho calls me.

I ignore him like I've been doing. I continue to walk but I heard them walk behind me "Jisung!" Minho tried again.

I turn around "What?!"

They stood there, staring at me "We'll be at the bench" Chan says, walking away and Changbin follows him.

Minho stares at me, probably noticing how much of a mess I look. "Are you—Are you okay?"

I chuckle bitterly "Am I okay?" I shake my head and felt tears brim my eyes. "No" I throw my hands up in the air with a shrug "I'm not" I start. Letting out a long exaggerated breath "I'm not fucking okay. Everyone keeps asking me that! But I'm not. I can't eat and I can't sleep. I still feel his hands on my body and I feel his breath on my neck, he might not be here anymore but it's like he still found a way to fuck with me!" My hands shook and Minho stands there, listening to me.

"How are you?" I shake my head "How are you okay? How can you laugh and go about your day?" I look down and chuckle, looking at him "I know. It's because you don't have anyone suspecting you. They look at me like I did it" I cried and Minho walks up to me, engulfing me in a hug.

I hated it. I fucking hated that I felt the need to hug him back. That I felt like I needed his comfort rather than my parents. His warmth, his gentle eyes, his gentle voice—I hated that I needed it.

I wrap my arms around him and I hug him tightly. "I didn't know you were going through all this Jisung"

"I didn't tell anyone"

Minho pulls away slightly and looks at me "But you could of told me"

I shook my head "No I couldn't, I don't even know where we stand anymore"