LIKE YOU MEAN IT
CHAPTER SEVEN !

HAZEL CALLAHAN HAD A PLAN! She was going to get Nell to talk to her even if it killed her! Well maybe not kill, she'd prefer not to die so early in life especially if her plan worked out but she'd definitely try her fucking hardest.

            The day after the kiss, the kiss that beat all other kisses, (not that she had much experience in that area) when she realised that Eleanor wouldn't just come up and talk to her but instead pretend it hadn't happened and that they suddenly weren't all that close, Hazel knew she needed a plan. So that's what she did. In her first free moment of the day, Hazel had whipped out her notebook which was usual designated for club activities, flipped all the way to the last few back pages and began to plan.

           Different coloured pens were used, vibrant highlighters that decorated the pages. Important things were underlined and given multiple exclamation marks. Titles were written in bubble letters and points had been bulleted. Hazel meant business!

            Multiple plans, all filled with potential had been run through and tossed aside. Call in a bomb scare and force Nell into a classroom and make her talk to her? Bit too extreme Hazel had rightly decided. Get into another one-on-one with the girl and take a bunch of hits and force Nell to care for her? Again, a little intense plus her busted bottom lip had only just begun to heal.

Finally, after going through a few different plans and weighing up the pros and cons, Hazel came to a decision. She was simply going to invite Nell over to her house. If the Hewitt girl wished to pretend things were normal between them, if she wished to pretend the kiss hadn't happened then that is exactly what Hazel would do. She would invite her over...of course, an ulterior motive was attached but Nell wouldn't know that until after she agreed.

            The only thing she still needed to figure out, was when the best time to ask Nell over would be. She'd initially wanted to ask her right away when they all showed up for the club but had to fight her desires when she noticed Nell heading over towards the bleachers to sit next to Josie. At one point, the two seemed to be deep in discussion though random chuckles filled the air between them. If Hazel hadn't been aware of Josie's painful, jaw-dropping and extremely obvious crush on Isabel, she might have found herself jealous.

            Before the club meeting began was a no go. After would be her best option. And so she waited patiently. Gave her entire focus to the meeting that this time consisted of all the girls being open and honest with one another.

            She watched as all the girls and Mr. G moved to sit down in a circle in the middle of the gym floor, her eyes practically glued to Nell as she began to lower herself to the floor. On one side of the Hewitt girl sat PJ while the other side was still empty. Before anyone else could push their way in and sit there, Hazel rushed forward, the girl almost sprinting before she tumbled into the spot, grinning sheepishly at the others as they watched her fumble.

A large, toothy smile was sent over at the Hewitt girl when she got settled into the spot. Nell smiled back which was a plus in Hazel's book. Maybe her plan would actually go off without a hitch.

A deep sigh caught her attention causing her blue eyes to shift over to a crossed legged Josie. "So, we know that the club has been a place where we can feel empowered physically but we also thought that it could be a safe space and a place we can open up and talk about our feelings."

Though it wasn't verbally expressed, many of the girls felt appreciation towards the girls. They appreciated just how welcoming and comforting a place the club had become for them all. Despite the fact that Hazel was aware of the original reason for the club's formation, she still enjoyed the opportunity she had gotten to form some real friendships.

"Okay, so, who's been raped?" PJ then inquired quite obnoxiously from them all. Hesitant glances were exchanged between many of the girls as the striped shirt clad PJ continued. "Just you know, raise your hand. Grey area stuff counts too."

At once, hands raised in the air. Every single girl in the room had experienced some form of sexual harassment, whether in the last year or as a young girl. Inappropriate behaviour towards women was still far too prevalent in this day and age.

Slyvie tapped her fingertips in an odd rhythm along the floor as she spoke up. "Everybody knows the situation with my stepdad. He's just—obsessed with Friday movie nights. I mean, god I get it, you're my new stepdad but...fuck whatever you know?" She was pissed off, something that was evident by the irritation that dripped from her voice.

"Every time I call the police about my stalker, they tell me to fill an online form and then the form tells me to call, so I call and they say they can't get involved until he tries to kill me." Stella-Rebecca admitted. She sounded unbothered by the shake of her pupils and the deep gulp she did told a different story. "And he keeps saying he's going to but that doesn't count, so it's just like annoying."

"Been there. We've all been there." PJ uttered with a nod of her head. She most certainly hadn't been in that situation. No one had ever stalked her, much less threatened to kill her. It wasn't until the club started that anyone really noticed her.

Unless you count someone writing Faggot #2 on her locker as being noticed.

From beside her, Hazel heard a throat clearing. She glanced over to see Nell's gaze glued to the floor as she slowly began to talk. "I was attacked by Huntington players the day school started up again. They like, cornered me in the park that I usually would take as a shortcut. Got me down on the grass and like, leaned themselves on me in a really gross way."

Hazel remembered that day. Nell had been covered in mud. Her face had been caked in dried soil and her clothes stained green from the grass she had been forced into. A comment on whether it was a fashion statement from Hazel had brought a smile to Nell's face, something that the Callahan girl had prided herself on, long before her understood her feelings for Nell.

She hadn't really known the extent of Eleanor's experience with the Huntington players until now. She found herself wishing she had expressed more concern that day.

An audible hitch in Nell's breathing was heard by the group as she attempted to keep herself composed. "Anyway, I don't go through that park anymore just in case they come back."

Everyone seemed to wait with bated breath. No one wanted to break the silence that had enveloped them. Some pretty heavy information had been dropped on them from the three girls and no one really knew how to deal with it.

Desperate to discuss her own issues, Brittany heavily sighed, breaking the quite and pulling the attention away from a somewhat stressed Nell. "Well, I've been assaulted like, a million times. But I'm more annoyed that everyone knows me for being beautiful and popular and no knows that I'm actually smart and super driven."

"Like I literally own a jewellery business and no talks about it." Confused looks were exchanged between the group. None of them had been aware of this jewellery business until Brittany mentioning it in that moment. This annoyed the beautiful cheerleader who scoffed. "See?"

"Well, ever since my parents divorce, my mom has been doing this like, midlife crisis. I don't know how that's really sitting with me, you know?" Hazel softly spoke. A deep but wavering breath was taken by the girl as she felt her emotions beginning to well up. "It's been really, really dark. This has just been really meaningful to me to like, get to know some new people who actually want to like, get to know me."

A shudder ran through her body as she spoke honestly. It felt amazing to get that out in the open.

Ignorant to her friends sadness, PJ quickly spoke up. "I just wanted to bring it back to Brittany for like one second." She seemed totally unfazed by the emotional rawness that Hazel had just experienced, instead all she wanted was to move back to Brittany.

Before Brittany could even consider beginning to speak again, Josie spoke up, almost cutting PJ off. "I can go next, if that's okay." She questioned the group.

Hazel was left feeling even worse than before. Her very really feelings had been basically stomped on and tossed aside by PJ, who didn't even seem to care. A frown formed as her stomach churned from rejection.

As Josie began to speak to the group, a muffled voice from her left caught the Callahan girl's attention. "Brittany's not gonna want you if you keep being a dick." She heard Nell aggressively whisper to an affronted PJ.

These words brought the softest of smiles to Hazel's lips, replacing the frown from moments ago. Even when they weren't exactly on the best of terms at that moment, Nell didn't hesitate to stick up for her.

"I don't really like talking about Juvie and everything that happened this summer. You know, obviously we get a lot of props or whatever cause people think it's so badass." Josie's voice displayed only the most sincere of tones. "But, it really wasn't. I mean, unless you consider getting hazed horrifically every single night 'badass. Obviously, you know we had to survive the Tributes and you know, I did have to like, fight people basically every single night."

Everyone was gripped, trailing along to every little word that tumbled free from Josie's lips. "People were like, betting on us and we were given like shivs and rusty pocket knives and splintered wood and uh, pipes as well. And we have to just like fight people sometimes to the death. And I sometimes still hear their screams at night and that guilt probably will, like always shackle me forever."

Nell was well aware this story was bullshit but even she had to admit this story was extremely enthralling. She found herself hanging on to every word. She wondered if Josie had ever considered a future in creative writing.

Josie continued on. "I realise now, I don't have to be that person anymore. Like I don't have to just let things happen to me cause of you guys. And um, I am like really grateful for what the club had become and just especially from where we started so, yeah sorry." A sheepish grin suddenly formed on Josie's lips as realisation set in.

Embarrassment washed over the girl while she stuttered out, "I feel like I kinda killed the vibe. I've never really, I guess said that to anyone before, sorry. People gonna like wrap up, maybe or—"

"I'm going through a divorce." Heads turned to the man as he spoke up. The room had fallen so quite, if you listened carefully enough you could sure hear the sound of the clock in the classroom next door. A broad, almost Cheshire Cat like grin appeared on the man's face. "Whoo! That shit felt good to say. Ooh, I'll tell y'all. Men need therapy."

            A now happier Josie chirped back up. "I think that's a good place to maybe wrap up."

            Satisfied with the club meeting that day, most of the girls began to rise to their feet, heading over to their backpacks to gather their belongings. Nell was one of those girls. As she stood off by the bleachers, hands gripping onto the straps of her backpack, she glanced back at those still on the floor. The corners of her mouth turned up at the sight of Hazel comforting Mr. G. A low chuckle fell from her lips as the girl patted him on the back.

Unconsciously, Nell found herself lingering behind as the others began to file out of the gymnasium. Only moments later, the empty spot beside her was filled by the body of Hazel Callahan, who reached for her own backpack but not before glancing over and smiling at Nell.

Nell watched on as she moved. "I saw you comforting Mr. G." She commented with a smile of her own. She found the action taken by Hazel to be really sweet.

Surprisingly, the atmosphere between the two wasn't all that awkward. Both seemed to be trying very hard to keep the mood stress free.

"Yeah, the guys more emotional than I thought he'd be." Hazel admitted with a chuckle. As she swung her backpack onto her shoulders, she brushed a small strand of hair that poked at her eye away while asking, "Hey, speaking of Mr. G. You wanna come over and study for his 'women murdered in history' test?"

She wondered if Nell would agree. She hoped Nell would agree. She had a plan and asking if the Hewitt girl wanted to study together was only the beginning. If she disagreed then—well, she was fucked cause that was her only plan.

"To your house? Isn't your mom still in her midlife crisis?" Amusement painted itself across Nell's face as she spoke. Her eyes glinted with humour. "I don't think I wanna hear your mom having sex while I research all the different women who've been murdered in the past."

The two shared a laugh, those Hazel's was laced with dejection, before Nell then said, "You can come over to mine though?"

This response Hazel had not been expected. Rejection had been assumed almost immediately after Nell turned down heading to the Callahan residence but an invitation to her house instead? Her heart raced and her palms moistened at the thought.

"Yeah, okay. I, uh, have to get my books from home but I-I can be over around, I don't know five?" Hazel clumsily stated. She fought the urge to scrunch up her eyes and groan in annoyance at herself as she fumbled.

"Cool. See you then, Hazel." Nell uttered her farewell, sending a quick wave and a simpering smile to the Callahan girl before spinning on her heel and making her way towards the exit.

"Bye." The word fell from Hazel's lips in a breath as she stared after the retreating Hewitt girl unabashedly, her jaw practically on the floor. Part one of her plan had actually gone through without a hitch. Who would have thought?

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jamielee's thoughts.
chapter seven. not proofread.
so yeah, this chapter is more hazel than nell but trust me, you're gonna like the next chapter cause i already know what's gonna happen. hope you enjoyed :)