You were there, lying awake in bed, unable to sleep once again. It's been a month now and still you weren't able to get a proper rest. Dark circles were starting to form around your eyes. You body was tired but your mind was wide awake, thoughts of that day stuck in your head.

I'm sick.

His words were running through your mind, unable to leave.

I need you.

**Flashback to Sunday** 

"I'm sick,Y/n," said Jimin.

You couldn't function for a moment. You felt as if your world just stopped and everything was crumbling down. "S-sick?" You managed to ask.

Jimin looked like he had just come to his senses and quickly looked at you with concern. "I'm sorry... I wasn't ever going to tell you this. I'm just... I'm a very selfish person, Y/n. I'm not usually, but deep down I am. And right now I want you-- no, I need you. More than anything. So Y/n, just let me have you; be like we were before."

**End of flashback**

His words never left your mind. Jimin told you he was diagnosed with a rare disease. He only broke up with you and hid it from you because he didn't want you to suffer more than you already were.

You started patting your cheeks. "Come on, Y/n. Just fall asleep," you wined to yourself, rolling around in your bed. You hated that you couldn't sleep.

You looked at the time on your phone and saw it was already 5am. You also saw ten new messages from Jhope, all calling out your name: Y/n? Y/n?. The last message was something different: Y/n, why are you ignoring me? What's wrong? Please tell me. You're making me worry...

You sighed and gave up on trying to sleep. You got up and decided to take a long shower and then eat some breakfast before going to visit Jimin at the hospital again. A few days ago he had just been in surgery so he's been at the hospital for a while now and you've secretly been going to see him every day.

Once you were done getting ready, you headed for the door and just as you were about to go out, someone stopped you.

"You're going again?" Jin asked. He stood beside the door.

"I'll be back soon," you said simply.

He blocked the doorway so that you couldn't leave. "Are you going to the hospital again?" Jin asked seriously.

Your eyes shot open. "You were spying on me?!" You said, angrily.

"Are you using it as some sort of cover up for you to see Jhope? Before that you've been going to see someone's house too. Is it Hoseok's?"

"Are you serious?" You snapped. "How can I even think of Jhope at a time like this when Jimin--"

You immediately stopped talking. You forgot you weren't supposed to tell anyone. You couldn't even talk to Jhope lately because if he saw you, he'd know something was wrong and want to be there for you. And knowing yourself, you wouldn't be able to hide your feelings from him.

"Jimin?" Jin repeated.

"Just don't tell anyone. And stop spying on me. It's getting old." With that, you left the house and went to the hospital.

You arrived at the hospital and silently opened the door to Jimin's hospital bedroom. You saw that Jimin was already awake and watching you as you entered the room.

"Hey. How are you?" You asked Jimin.

He smiled at you. "A bit better than yesterday but it still hurts on my side," he said.

You smiled back at him. "That's good," you said.

He looked at you, pretending to be hurt. "Good? Me still hurting is a good thing?" He asked, offended.

You laughed a bit. That's obviously not what you meant but you went along with it. "Yes. You deserve it after breaking up with me and hurting me," you joked.

He went serious. "Y/n. I told you. I had to do it so that you could hate me and move on more easily," he said with sad eyes.

You laughed, trying to loosen him up. "I know, I know. I was kidding. It's okay," you said, but deep down it wasn't okay. He caused you a lot of hurt and no matter how much he hurt you, you couldn't hate him and that only caused you to hurt more. But you understood why he did it so you let it slide. He was suffering and needed you. The least you could do was be there for him.

He took your hand as you stood next to his hospital bed where he lay. "But I guess I did deserve it," he said, smiling slightly. His smile faded and he kept staring down at your hand and his together. You almost felt a bit uncomfortable. He was about intertwine his hand in yours when, to your relief, a nurse walked in and you took the opportunity to pull your hand away from his. Hopefully he had not noticed you were uncomfortable with it.

"Sorry to interrupt, but would you like to have breakfast now?" The nurse asked Jimin.

"Yes, please. I'm starving," Jimin said.

Soon Jimin's breakfast arrived and you sat on the chair next to his bed as he ate.

"Um, sorry, I may have blurted out something to Jin about you being here," you said while looking down. You felt bad about it. Jimin really didn't want anyone to know and worry too much about him. "I found out he was following me," you said.

He laughed. "Is he following you this time because of Hoseok?" Jimin asked.

You looked up at him, confused. "This time? You knew he used to follow you?" You asked.

He laughed again. "Did you only find out about it now? Yeah, I noticed," he said. "Don't worry if Jin knows, okay? It's okay," Jimin said while giving you a reassuring smile. He then continued to eat.

As you watched him eat, you started dozing off and eventually fell asleep. After a while you woke up to find Jimin staring at you. He was admiring how peaceful you looked while sleeping.

"Oh, you're up," Jimin said. "Did you sleep well?"

"It was a bit uncomfortable but it was nice to sleep for once," you said.

"You could've lied on the bed next to mine," he said.

You looked on the other side of the room and noticed for the first time, the empty bed on the other side of the room. "Oh. I didn't notice it."

"Still clueless as ever, I see," he smiled.

"Hey, Jimin, you idiot," you heard a familiar voice say from outside the door. He then stepped in. It was Taehyung. He walked in smiling at Jimin, showing off his box smile. "You want to get rid of us that much?" He joked. "It's gonna have to take a lot more than that for us to leave."

As Tae walked in, he was followed by Kookie and Jin.

"How could you keep this from us, Jimin?" Kookie asked, rushing to Jimin's side along with Taehyung. Tae ruffled Jimin's hair and Jimin laughed. "We missed you," Jungkook said, laughing. Jimin laughed too. He looked happy to be seeing the familiar faces he missed seeing the past few months.

Jin then walked in and when Jimin saw him, Jin smiled to him. When you saw Jin, you almost wanted to tell him he wasn't supposed to tell anyone. But then you saw Jimin's face. He was happy seeing them all. "The nurse told us about you're condition. You could have told us, you know. What good are friends if we weren't there for you during your toughest days," Jin said, smiling sympathetically to Jimin.

You looked to them all and smiled. You were happy they were all here to support him.

Jimin laughed, his eyes tearing up just a little bit. "I was being an asshole to you guys for a reason, you know," Jimin said. "Why are you guys here?"

"Well, I don't know why but Jin called us here... but we're here for Y/n," said Namjoon, who was standing in the doorway with Yoongi.

Yoongi then spoke. "We don't know you that well. But from what I've experienced is that you were mean to Y/n and not exactly someone I'm too fond of... But we do know that Y/n really cares about you so we're here to support you both."

"Jin, did you tell everyone? They don't even know Jimin," you said to Jin. 

Jin laughed nervously. "No... Just them," he said, giving an apologetic smile. "I didn't really know what to tell Hoseok, so I left him out..."

Jimin laughed. "It's okay, Y/n. They came to be here for you. You've made really good friends," said Jimin. He then turned to Yoongi and Namjoon. "You and I may not have gotten onto a good start. I'd like for us to begin again. I'm Jimin," he introduced himself.

They greeted back and you all soon started talking normally and catching up. After a while Jimin's parents came to visit too and the guys left but you still stayed with Jimin. You felt guilty whenever you had to leave his side.

"Y/n, you're dozing off again. I think you should go home and rest now," said Jimin. It was already four in the afternoon now.

"No, I want to stay here with you," you said. "I'll even stay over for the night. I'll sleep in that bed over there," you said, rushing the bed on the other side of the room.

"No, Y/n, you can't," Jimin said. "Jin will get worried. Plus tomorrow's school for you. You can't visit me after school again."

"Okay, I'll go," you said. "I'll see you tomorrow. I hope you feel better soon," you said and smiled.

You left and were on your way home. The hospital was near your house so you could just walk home. You really didn't want to go home. The truth was that you hated being alone nowadays because that was the time when all of your deepest thoughts swallowed you up. You hated it so much. And you kept feeling guilty whenever you left Jimin's side.

"Y/n!" You heard someone call out. You looked up and saw you were already in front of your house. Jhope stood at your front door. It seemed he had been waiting for you there.

You wanted to just walk away; ignore him. But it was too late now. He saw your sad and exhausted face. He gasped and quickly rushed to you. You didn't know what to do so you just stood there. When he got to you, he immediately embraced you.

For some reason, when you rested in his arms, you suddenly felt calm. Your mind finally calmed. It felt as if all your worries finally disappeared. Being in his arms was what you wanted from the very start when Jimin told you he was sick but you couldn't. Because it made you felt guilty. But right now it felt so right. If you weren't in his arms, you didn't know how you would survive. Being in his arms... It felt like home.

But you knew it was wrong.

"I'm fine," you said, trying to pull away.

"I can tell something's wrong," he said, holding you closer. His voice... The one voice you've been longing to hear... It sounded so soothing. "I don't know what it is but I really hate to see someone depressed like that."

You're eyes shot open. You've heard those words somewhere before. He said those exact words the day you and he first met.

"Please don't..." You whispered to yourself and buried your head deeper into his chest. You lifted your arms up and slowly pushed him off you. "Hoseok, I can't do this..." You said, softly, not even daring to look up at him.

He looked at you, confused and concerned. "Can't do what?"

"This. Being with you. I can't even look at you right now," you said.

"Y/n, what are you talking about? Y/n, just tell me what's wrong," Jhope said, panicking. You felt bad. He didn't even know what was going on. He didn't deserve it. But you didn't know what to tell him.

Jhope took your hand, bringing you back to reality. "Remember the day you first met me? Do you remember what I told you?" He asked. For the first time you looked up at him and into his eyes. "When you think all hope is lost, I will appear and be here to help you. I believe now is that moment." He took a step closer to you. "Y/n. Let me be your hope."

You stared into his eyes for a long time. Nothing was going through your mind. You weren't even thinking. You only stared into his eyes. Because it was the only thing you could do for yourself. You already knew the answer.

"You can't," you said, taking your hand out of his.

Forgive me. 

"Hope can't solve what I'm going through right now."

Still, stay with me.

"No matter how much you try to convince me, I can't be with you," you said and your eyes started to tear up.

Still, don't give up on me.

"You can never be my source of hope. Now... Now you only cause me pain," you said, clenching your fists on your sides.

Please, Jung Hoseok...

"So... Please... Please, stay away from me. It's the only good thing you can do for me."

...bring me back my hope.

You rushed to walk past him and ran into the house, leaving him alone outside. You wanted to leave before he could see your tears. You didn't want him to see you cry again. You were also too afraid to know his react to all you had said. You tried your best to not tell him the way you really felt.

When you entered the house, you felt like you could barely breathe. You were shaking. Finally you burst out crying. It was the hardest thing; rejecting Jhope. Especially when really all you wanted was to be with him. And be in his arms, where you felt warm and safe. Now all you could feel was emptiness.

Jhope, please save me.

-------------------------------------