Pratyusha Banerjee, my face claim for Jodha (see attached media), was an actress who starred in a popular Bollywood series called Balika Vadhu (meaning 'Child Bride'). Her character's role in the series consisted of self-improvement after suffering child marriage and her character, Anandi, became a teacher as a result.

Why am I telling you this? I don't know. I suppose this fanfic, Jodha's role as a teacher, is my way of honouring Pratyusha and also, to an extent, Anandi.

Plus, I think Carlisle and Jodha make a fine pair. She's perfect for him.

Hopefully, you'll understand why in this chapter.

Thank you for reading!

• • •

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• • •

[26th June, 2006]

• • •

"YOU'RE MEETING HER TODAY," Esme chirped, brimming with smiles when Carlisle made his appearance in the living room.

"I am," he confirmed, unable to keep the toothy grin off his face.

He'd been smiling often lately, thanks to a certain young teacher, and he knew the rest of his family members noticed - even if they were polite enough not to poke fun at him for it. He was especially grateful for their mercy in keeping mum about Friday night.

At some point during the night, he considered tossing the article of clothing away. Not because it offended him but, even hidden away in his closet, the imprint of her scent still lingered in his room. In his mind.

Driving him to the point of madness with her heady musk, he swore he tasted her.

Walking into his closet this morning had been nothing short of a beautiful nightmare. Venom trickled, his taste buds in a frenzy. Before he knew it, he had plunged into his perversion - fisting the material as he buried his nose into the fabric of his coat, eager for another smell of her, wishing he had agency to act on the erotic visages she imbued.

Surely, it felt as if the bonds of his self-control were shattering - one by one.

Esme yanked him out of his reverie. "We can't wait to meet her, Carlisle. Don't keep her to yourself for too long."

He chuckled, fingers tapping a random rhythm along the outline of his briefcase. "As human social convention would have it, meeting my family is far too early a step and I think Jodha would agree."

"True." Esme twisted her lips in a frown, then brightened a bit. "I forgot to ask if she liked the flowers. Emmett made me worry that I was being derogatory by giving her brown flowers and being overly cultural with the pot because..." She winced, fiddling with some unfolded tea-cloths. "Well, you know."

"She loved it, Esme. I don't think she'll find offense in someone acknowledging her culture. You did well." He shook his head at the memory. "Though she felt guilty that you had to part from your special plants."

Esme's quiet laughs ended on a coo. "She sounds sweet and kind, brother. I have never been so impatient to meet someone in my life."

"Soon. I promise you all. Let her get more comfortable with me first." A muted pang thumped his chest, that longing to finally be coupled with her rising again. "She needs more time." A reminder to himself. Good things came to those who had the patience to bear the preliminary trials and he was anything but impatient.

A torturous path led him towards a hopeful redemption, he prayed he would survive. He didn't think he could need someone as much as he needed Jodha. Nevertheless, here she was debunking his every misconception about his doomed life.

Making him forsake lonely dreams to work towards achieving his desired reality.

Love, laughter and wholesome living.

Nevertheless, he knew what she smelled like - and discovered he could imagine her taste in vivid detail - and he didn't know how he was going to bear sitting next to her without wanting to touch or kiss her.

Or whisper shameless, seductive couplets in her ear and watch as she became breathless.

He couldn't.

He didn't want to.

Something primeval threatened to erupt within him and with every passing moment in Jodha's presence, he knew the thread of his self-control would eventually snap.

He would break, and no man or creature would be able to stop him.

• • •

[28th June, 2006]

• • •

"YOU KNOW MY BAPU forgot to ask you the most important question Friday."

Her smile set her face alight, her inner joy infectious - filling him with her natural light and he knew that he'd never tire of these daily lunches with her. This past week had them settled in a comfortable routine. They would ensure the other was still available for lunch before starting work. Carlisle would pick Jodha up and they would frequent one of the few quiet cafes the town offered, conversing about the exciting and mundane. Offering each other more insight into their individual lives.

Carlisle couldn't remember ever taking this much downtime for himself. He never took his full lunch hour, for obvious reasons. Ten minutes chatting with his colleagues by the coffeepot in the hospital lounge served a good outward impression, and the rest of time was spent in his office reading over cases or making another rounds to ensure his patients were on the mend.

All the time on his hands was used for productive reasons. Even the literature of renowned and celebrated authors over the millennia no longer boasted the same indulgence he once experienced.

At times, he felt suffocated by them.

Whatever he used to enjoy lost its allure. Jodha was taking up ample space in his head, luring him towards a change of pace, a change in tastes and novel adventures, chances he never once dared to take but found himself willing to do all the same.

Most importantly, he wanted to share these experiences with Jodha. Nothing would ever feel right on his own anymore.

He wanted her. Good heavens, how he wanted her.

He sipped at the strong coffee, careful not to eye the mushroom ravioli he ordered for appearances with excessive disdain. Instead, he kept his focus on the beauty before him, matching her charming smile with one of his own. "And what's that, my dear?"

"Well," a slight frown marred her features, "more about you, I suppose. Your past. Your past...relationships. I mean, only if you want to share. I don't want you to think you owe me any sort of explanation or-"

"Relax, Jodha." He set his cup aside, hand sliding across the table to cover the back of hers. "I told you. I have nothing to hide and I will answer any question you have for me."

Taking great liberty in tracing idle patterns over the delicate skin, he wasn't ignorant of the way her heart accelerated. The same way it did earlier when he reached over the car's console and swept her up in a searing kiss that left him - them - only aching for more. Surrounding him in her sweet scent, coupled with her strong arousal, how easily bothered he made her, wishing he could murmur in her ear that he knew what she did.

What it did to him and what he would do as repayment for it.

They both would never truly reach completion when the buzz beneath their skin, that proverbial itch, begged to be soothed and satisfied.

Lord have mercy on him.

Steering his train of thought back to the conversation at hand, he considered his words carefully - fixing his stare on the rim of his coffee cup. "I've...only been in one relationship."

Jodha, who prepared to take a sip of her hot chocolate, clunked her cup back on the saucer with a slight rattle. Her shock evident, her eyes roving over his features in disbelief. He didn't know how to react - a first for him.

"Really?"

He moistened his lips and nodded. "Yes."

"How is that possible?"

"I don't understand," he countered with a slight smile.

Gasping out a shaky laugh, Jodha raised her hand in a delicate gesture around her face. "I mean, have you looked in a mirror lately? You're beyond handsome, Carlisle. I refuse to believe you've only had one relationship in your lifetime."

A vampire's appearance was more than for cosmetic perfection. Its main functionality was to attract prey. Humans who succumbed to the thrall of timeless beauty and impulsive passion made for perfect victims. Sometimes, it was effortless to lure the target towards their death. For Carlisle, his appearance was bait for a never-ending torrent of women in the workplace flirting with him or going above and beyond to snag a chance at getting him a cup of coffee or asking about his day, his shift...

His family even.

Edward managed to preserve his dignity for over eighty years but Carlisle's relationship record was otherwise sparkling. Seeing that his lifetime spanned almost three hundred and sixty-six years, one relationship was quite the achievement. Promiscuity never crossed his mind. How he longed to see her reaction to such an admission.

The notion made him grin. "Thank you, darling. To be fair, however, it lasted a long time."

"Yeah? What was her name?"

"Vivian." He watched Jodha take a sip of her drink, how her unpainted, shell-pink lips caressed the cup, that miniscule drop of cocoa on her top lip swiped into nothingness by her tongue.

"It lasted ten years," he added as an afterthought. Give or take, his relationship with Vivian almost closed in on half a century therefore a ten-year period seemed like a qualifying human measure of commitment.

He detested lying but he tried to be as humanly close to the truth as possible.

"Wow, that's quite a while, Carlisle." He glanced at her, frowning and unsure of why he didn't like the cool acceptance of his admission. This was his past, after all. He should be grateful, relieved, that Jodha was willing to swallow all that he was about to dish out.

Nevertheless, the blatant stares of men giving his woman appreciative looks this past week, admiring her profile and her youth, didn't sit well with him. In fact, it downright maddened him that they dared to do so in his presence until he had to make his claim on her abundantly clear.

Yet, here she remained, oblivious to his sufferings and totally unaffected by the sight or mention of another woman around him.

God, he really needed help.

"Were you guys married?"

He swallowed another mouthful of coffee, an automatic action tinted with a slight panic, and he wondered if he should've called a lower number. "No, I've never been married."

Voicing it indicated to Carlisle just how unsavory this cover story was becoming and he attempted to amend with more truth. "It took me a very long time to realize and understand that she wasn't the right person for me."

She raised a brow, pursing her lips. "That's...quite some time to get to that realization."

He couldn't stop from wincing as he looked down, utterly ashamed. What would she say had she known he held on for over forty years before he realized it was all in vain? Before he understood that he was destroying himself whilst trying to convert Vivian to a more humane way of life to no avail?

"I know. I was young, stupid and hopeful." He let out a short, bitter laugh. "Made me blind to a lot of things that were unacceptable. I mean, I don't say it to place blame on anyone, of course. It was my fault for holding on to the fantasy of change and betterment in order to quell my lonesomeness."

"You were quite young, weren't you? When you got with her?"

"Yes."

"But, ten years. What could've gone so wrong?"

The doctor could do nothing but gape at her, the fierce passion at him preserving what could've lasted a lifetime. Despite having him to herself, her heart harboured no selfish desires from him - only seeking to understand and appreciate.

He considered himself healed from it all and he wanted nothing but to be better, constantly improving himself for the woman who was more than deserving of his time.

"She liked doing a lot of, um, morally questionable acts for her personal enjoyment."

Jodha cocked her head to the side, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "Like, sleeping her way to the top, kind of thing?"

His laugh was genuine this time. "Sort of, but not entirely." It was no secret that Vivian had enjoyed playing with her male victims. A fun tussle with her food, giving them the last time of their lives with the panache only a voluptuous vampire was capable of. A true succubus, according to Edward at the time.

Carlisle refused to believe it, intent on trying to see the good. Even Esme and the others had been willing to give her the benefit of the doubt despite their reservations.

He should've known better.

"And you still stayed?"

Saying nothing, he gave a slight nod.

"Why?"

He met her eyes, lips curving in a smile of consternation. "Perhaps it was loneliness. Perhaps it was blind love. Or the need to be rid of one and the desperation to have the other." He straightened, nodding to himself in slight shock that he was able to bare himself to her. Never in his life had he uttered such truer words. It felt right, sharing this part of himself with her.

"And your parents never questioned you on it? Did they ever meet her?"

He barely remembered what it felt like to have a parent, having gotten accustomed to considering himself as that authority. Letting out a slow, practiced breath, he shook his head. "No. I lost my parents pretty early on in life. My father passed on when I was in my early twenties."

Jodha swallowed audibly, her throat tightening - a mist forming in her sympathetic eyes. "And your mother?" The murmured question brought a glassy sheen of unshed tears to the fore.

Did it matter how long he had lived? Did it matter that he wondered countless times what sort of woman his mother would have been? A good, patient woman - based on the experiences he'd endured under his father's care. Sometimes he contemplated if his fate would've been the same were his mother alive rather than his father. He wondered if his father was a different person before his mother's death. If his father blamed him for his mother's fate though the man said nothing for him to feel as such. Or if he did, Carlisle sure couldn't recall that instance.

Moreover, Carlisle understood why Jodha was asking. Their losses gave them something to connect with. He never pondered on those losses for too long, bottling it up over the centuries and burying it so far beneath the exterior he'd carefully crafted for himself that, sometimes, it seemed almost effortless to forget his past. Time factored in, a natural healer. Not meant to be a perpetual avoidant, by any means.

But here was Jodha, making him dredge it up all over again, wondering if he needed a certain closure to fully put some of his past behind him. If she ever got the closure she needed to help with her grief.

"I wasn't even a day old before I lost her."

The ants travailing between the cracks on the sidewalk claimed his attention, his heart holding an uncanny poignancy, a burgeoning catharsis unlike any other feeling he ever experienced. Registering Jodha's lack of breath, her stunned expression, the tell-tale bead of a salty tear in the corner of her left eye, all these things creeping under his layered skin.

He couldn't bear to see her cry for him, because of him. He never wanted to be the reason for her tears. "Please, Jodha, it was...ages ago."

"Doesn't mean it would hurt less." She smiled sadly, tightening her grip on his hand. "I'm so sorry, Carlisle."

Before he could overthink it, he brought her hand to his mouth and peppered the back of it with kisses, eager to show his gratitude for her never-ending patience and grace with him. "Thank you, sweetheart, but I've had a lot of time to move on. From my parents and especially from my ex. I've had some good years to evaluate and realize that, despite being in such a lengthy relationship, I emerged not knowing what love is supposed to be like and how wrong I was for trying to chase it. Maybe now, I'm probably still guilty of not knowing how to give or receive love despite wanting to."

"Don't say that. You were younger. It's obvious you've grown from the experience. And you're all the better for it." She enveloped his hands in her dainty ones, her grip surprisingly strong without being forceful. He fought against the innate shame, struggling to keep her gaze, frowning when her lovely dark eyes crinkled in guilty earnestness. "You deserve all the good things of this world, because you're a good man. Love comes towards those who are capable of loving and putting others first. From what I've heard so far, you do that. Wonderfully." Her head bowed. "I shouldn't have asked all these things, Carlisle. I'm sorry if you felt for one second that I was judging you. I just wanted to understand."

"I know, don't worry. I wanted to tell you, be honest with you." He turned his palm upright, closing his fingers around her delicate wrist, passing his thumb over the visible green veins, feeling her pulse race at the brief, exhilarating contact. Reassuring himself that he hadn't invoked his own ruination with his weighty admission, that he hadn't already lost her before he had a proper chance to win her over.

"I really appreciate that. Besides," she grinned, "I may not have had any prior relationship experience but I can still share in your need to find out what love feels like. Real love, that is."

His smile widened, the mountain on his shoulders dissipating in a snap. "I don't mind that in the slightest." Especially when that means finding it with you.

Fifteen quiet, excruciating minutes later, he returned her safely to the school - surprised when Jodha leaned forward to press a kiss close to the corner of his mouth before throwing her arms around him and lodging her face in his neck.

He breathed her in as she breathed him in. Taking joy and comfort in the fact that their hearts were becoming more intertwined, the magnetic jolt of their pull becoming increasingly difficult to hold on to without allowing it to spiral out of control.

The faint scent of buttery crust and strawberry jam lingered on her tantalizing warm skin and he had to refrain from caging her face in his hand and plundering her mouth right then and there. Instead, he wrapped an arm around her and dropped a little kiss on her temple - giving them both hope for the future.

After such a heavy conversation, it was obvious she needed some time to process this information.

He would accept what she gave him, etching every blessed tactile contact, every emotional link, to memory.

"See you again, Carlisle."

Sighing, he shook his head at her with a soft smile. She never spoke of the future in definitive terms. No 'see you tomorrow' or 'talk to you tonight'. One of her many peculiarities that suffused a fond warmth in his chest.

It showed her respect for mortality. Never knowing when her number would be called. Always living for every moment in each day and thankful for the opportunity to do so the next.

Self-aware but content. Her mother's loss further cementing those feelings, he was sure. Jodha knew her limitations and weaknesses but it didn't detract from her strengths and unwavering courage. If anything, he desired to help her transform her weaknesses into more strengths, contribute towards building her up in ways she was yet to dream of.

For someone who knew nothing about love, he was certain he was falling into it. At the very least, his infatuation was turning into something greater sooner than he had hoped for.

So much for taking things slow.

• • •

BACK AT THE HOSPITAL, things were quiet. Slow, thankfully, though he preferred keeping his mind busy. Nevertheless, he perused his case files, trying his best not to think of the woman he'd just lunched with. The few bites of ravioli he forced down remained unsettled in his stomach, the venom working through it bit by bit. Always slower than it did for liquids but not any less uncomfortable.

He scanned the contents of the first file, absorbing what it said without understanding, eyes glazing as he found himself being sucked back into his musings. There was no endangering his skills as a doctor but he worried that Jodha might become too great of a distraction, even if she didn't mean to be.

Those late-night discussions and lunch meetings guaranteed getting his fill of her presence and personal sunlight. Then why did he crave more, feel like he would desiccate when he wasn't in her presence?

Despite laying out the groundwork for what they wanted, the road ahead was proving to be a bumpy one but somehow, Carlisle knew the extra effort would be the most rewarding.

Confessing all what he did hadn't reduced his want for her, his need to reach that elusive point of love. Her reaction was aggravating in its neutrality, displaying no hint of what was working in that strange mind of hers.

I may not have had any prior relationship experience...

Heat spiked in him at her own admission. Innocent in its delivery but a sinful undercurrent bled through the words. Against his better judgment, he delighted in the idea of her being unmarked territory, of never having once received the pleasure that a man was capable of giving a woman. A pleasure that couldn't be so easily replicated by one's own doing.

Recoiling from his indecorous thoughts, he wondered if he was capable of it. Edward had the good sense to wait until his marriage to Bella but the more important part was yet to be discovered.

Would he hurt her?

On a private island, where all self-control can and possibly will be shed, would Edward still make a grave mistake?

Carlisle knew the answer to it, of course. His son would much rather dismember himself than let any harm come to his mate. He had complete faith in the boy.

It was baseless, however, to derive a conclusive outcome from Edward's experience for his own inner turmoils and apprehensions. He knew his relationship with Jodha would be different. Had there been more documented incidents of vampire-human relationships, it might've felt easier to move things along.

All what he convinced Edward to believe, Carlisle began to doubt his very own words.

Ludicrous, was what his family would say. He was a surgeon and a trauma specialist. He'd been around humans for centuries, treating them and having to perform physicals. He'd also hugged his future daughter-in-law oftentimes without incident, knowing just the right amount of pressure her body was capable of withstanding without being injurious.

But Jodha was a different situation altogether. Kissing her was quite the feat, when all he ached to do was sweep her up in a choking hug - a trivial act that threatened his self-control. Then noticing her every little tick and quirk - how she worried her lip when faced with a thought-provoking question; her well-timed jokes and laidback nature; the heave of her chest when she feigned annoyance at him the rare times he won her in a healthy debate - erased any sensible path to continue on. Sweet heavens, even her intelligence and natural wisdom inflamed more than a need for a verbal jousting.

Snapping the file shut, he leaned into his executive chair, hands folded on his torso as he closed his eyes and attempted some mindfulness meditation. Acknowledging the intense attraction he felt for his beautiful mate which, unfortunately, wasn't easy to dismiss. Not even in a mental exercise.

Though he didn't need the mental exercise more than he needed a-

You need to stop this, Cullen.

"Good God." He stood and plucked his white coat off the hanger and threw it on, ensuring that his penlight was in the breast-pocket before leaving the office. A walk along the ward would serve him well. Give him something to narrow his focus on the present rather than what was to come.

Even though it would be a while before he and Jodha reached that stage, there was a ton to prepare for.

Why did the idea of being with her like that frighten him?

• • •

POURING JUST A TOUCH of carrot oil on her fingers, Jodha worked the liquid in her hair with deliberate slowness - letting the scent and familiarity of her hair-care routine lull her into a sedate calmness.

Sitting before the vanity, she picked up her brush, letting the bristles smooth away the knots until each wavy lock shone under the yellow light and curled loosely at the ends. Usually, she would look at her reflection to gauge what she was doing but her mind seemed too preoccupied to focus on anything else.

Even minutes before her last class, she recalled with chagrin, Mrs. Weber had to shake her out of her trance. Still, the chatter in her brain and all the taunting white noise that came with it was insistent and she knew she had no choice but to confront this, acknowledge it before she drove herself crazy.

Ten. Freaking. Years.

For ten years, Doctor Carlisle Cullen loved someone. It wasn't the fact that he did but the reasoning behind his actions. With each answer he provided, more questions bubbled to the surface.

Based on his age now and counting the fact that he had enough time to move on, his relationship with Vivian would've begun at a young age. Maybe nineteen, twenty?

That made her his first love. His first kiss. His first everything. Right down to the heartbreak.

How is it that he didn't marry her? Despite his reasonings for not leaving, did he even make an attempt before he realized he had enough? What circumstance was finally the tipping point for Carlisle to separate from her?

What did his kids and his sister think of this Vivian when he finally brought her home?

Maybe it was the fact that he adopted? Maybe Vivian didn't want kids at the time, not even through her boyfriend.

Possibly.

Or maybe she cheated on him. Or maybe she was a petty criminal, given the fact she enjoyed morally questionable activities.

He'd had time to get over the pain, the uncertainty, the harrowing nights where he probably waited up for her only to realize that she would be coming in late again. All while suffering the loss of his father as well.

No wonder he clung to his relationship with Vivian. The only thing that would've made him feel something other than the pain he underwent.

Jodha felt sick.

Even after all that and his self-effacing conviction that he didn't know the slightest thing about love - it tore at her insides and she longed to soothe the pinpricks of his hurt that came with rehashing old memories.

Jodha knew it was ridiculous to be so ecstatic about his past. How could she not be when she had this beautiful man all to herself?

With all that they discussed, she noticed Carlisle never once said that he was unsure of what he wanted. No, he was confident in wanting to be close to her yet she was glad that they would take things slowly.

Which meant that she should probably curb her inappropriate thoughts of him. A man of class, Carlisle deserved better without her needing to cheapen the overall experience. She couldn't control how her body reacted to him but she would control how she acted upon those feelings. Whatever happened, she'd let it happen, of course, but she didn't want to make the same mistakes as he did.

She wanted love and respect from a man she could love and respect. A love that wasn't derived from desperation or loneliness but would still render them desperate for each other's touch and make them feel as if loneliness was a fate without their company.

Carlisle is that man. A shudder of untold pleasure skimmed her spine.

She knew, without a sliver of doubt, that she would do everything in her power to make this man feel cared for and cherished because he deserved it more than anyone else in this world.

There was no room for Vivian in his heart and mind anymore. He had ousted her for good and Jodha was certain that if she were to hurt Carlisle - intentionally or not - he wouldn't hesitate to oust her from his heart and mind as well.

It didn't matter how long he stuck with somebody but the eventual realization would bring him to an unchanging decision.

Whoever chose for Carlisle to harden his heart towards them, Jodha couldn't help but feel very sorry for their loss.

The thought of him locking her out like that made her shiver. Some would say she was past the point of madness; she didn't even know this man as well as she should, yet she couldn't bear the idea of never seeing him again. Never experiencing his gentle demeanour, his chivalrous attitude, his fathomless mind, the sweltering heat accompanying his kisses and the otherworldly allure of his physical beauty.

Jesus.

Carlisle had her in the palm of his hand - and he didn't even know it.

Jodha glanced behind at her bookcase, where a garlanded portrait of her mother hung, and grinned - surprising herself with her next words. "Well, Ma, I think this time, I won't mind an arranged marriage."

• • •

That wraps up this chapter. Carlisle and Jodha are so cute. I wonder how long Carlisle will be able to hold out on his attraction and if Jodha would abide by her intention of not being inappropriate.

The chapters are getting tougher as I go along but I'm nothing if not passionate about a good love story filled with character-driven prose.

Votes and comments to help motivate me or provide constructive feedback are always welcome.

If you're interested in keeping up with my writing progress, do give my profile a follow!

I could really use the love 🥺

And, as always, thank you for reading.

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