The dream about my brother from earlier still weighed heavy on my mind as the group of us sat in a dimly lit room, listening as a girl recited some sort of poem.

Luna had told us to wait in here, to relax, until the boats returned that would be able to take us back to land. We weren't really willing to go without convincing Luna to take the flame, but I seemed that we didn't have much of a choice.

The sound of a door opening near the front of the room caused all of us to perk up slightly. "She's back." Bellamy announced, reaching out to tap Clarke on the leg. "Let's go talk to her."

I watched as the two of them stood, not saying a word to the rest of us before making their way toward Luna. I felt anger begin to bubble in my chest at the sight of the two of them together.

"Do they seem closer than usual, or is it just me?" I muttered, turning back to Jasper and Octavia.

Octavia looked over at me with a quizzical look, "Bellamy and Clarke?"

I nodded, glancing back over my shoulder to where the two stood. "It's like they're a two-man team and we're just here as backup or something."

"You're overreacting." Octavia promised, "That's how it's always been."

I shrugged, "Maybe that's my point then."

"Hey," Jasper said, prying his eyes away from the girl on the makeshift stage. "Didn't you two break up anyway? Who cares about him and Clarke."

I felt my jaw drop slightly as Octavia awkwardly looked away, trying to remove herself from the conversation. "I-That's not the point, Jasper." I snapped, feeling my face reddening. "I was just making an observation."

"Right." he muttered, refocusing on the girl who he seemed rather enthralled with.

With my attention focused on glaring at Jasper, I had barely noticed the arrival of another person.

"We need to talk." Luna's voice caused me to jump slightly, not expecting her to have approached us.

When I turned, I realized her attention was focused on Octavia, who gave a small nod of her head.

Jasper turned to me, grabbing a hold of my arm, "That's our cue then."

Scowling, I pulled my arm away from him as we left Octavia and Luna alone. "Everyone is just full of private conversations today aren't they?"

Jasper glanced over at me as he flopped down into an empty chair. "What the hell has gotten into you?" he demanded. "You're being a real-"

"Don't say it." I warned, lowering myself into a seat beside him. When I could still feel him watching me, waiting for an answer, I shrugged. "I don't know." I sighed. "I just-what's there to even be happy about anymore."

He was watching me carefully. "You mean cause you don't have Bellamy anymore?"

My eyes fell to the floor as I shook my head. "No. I mean because everything has gone to shit, Jasper."

"Weren't you the one who told me it gets better?" He questioned, referring back to a conversation we had when he had lost Maya.

"Yeah, well." I muttered, pulling at my fingers. "Maybe I'm a liar."

"Avery?"

A new voice cut into the conversation, causing me to wince ever so slightly. What could he want?

I turned, my eyes meeting Bellamy's who were soft, like he was afraid I was going to break if he said the wrong thing. "Can I talk to you?

My eyes shifted to Clarke who was standing behind, her eyes darting around the room as if on edge.

"Why not?" I murmured, motioning to the empty seat beside me.

"Right." Jasper muttered, pushing himself to his feet. "I'm going to get a drink."

I watched as he made his way across the room, in the direction of the pretty girl who had just finished telling her story up front.

"I'm going to go talk to Octavia." Clarke announced, causing me to glance over to where Octavia now sat alone, seemingly done speaking to Luna.

Bellamy gave Clarke a small nod, his eyes following her as she left.

"So, what's the verdict?" I mumbled, my eyes flickering toward Bellamy as he sat down. "Is Luna going to take the flame?"

Bellamy sighed, running his hands over his thighs. "No." he answered, looking over to me with a defeated look.

I nodded slightly, "What do we do then?"

"Clarke will figure something out." He answered, glancing over his shoulder toward her.

"Of course she will." I muttered under my breath, following Bellamy's line of sight.

Bellamy either didn't hear my statement or chose to ignore it. "You had a nightmare earlier."

His words came out in a statement, not a question. When I looked over at him, he was watching me with worry.

I shrugged, my eyes falling down to look at my hands "It was just a dream."

"Avery, you were screaming." he argued. "You haven't had a nightmare in months-"

"—You don't know that." I challenged, looking up at him once again. "You have slept me with in weeks, Bellamy. How could you possibly know when the last time I had a nightmare was."

He looked taken aback for a moment. "Avery—"

"No." I sighed, standing up and taking a step away from him. "I don't want to fight with you, Bellamy."

"Then don't!" he pleaded, following suit and standing up.

I sent him a glare as I shook my head. "I'm going for a walk." I announced. "—Alone." I clarified upon noting the fact that he was about to speak.

Bellamy let out a sigh of defeat. "Where are you going to go, Avery?"

"Don't worry," I muttered, "There's not too many places for me to disappear to. We are in the middle of the freaking ocean after all."

---

The wind nipped at my face as my hair flew around wildly. Despite the fact that it kept blowing into my face, I didn't have the desire nor effort to tie it back. Quite frankly, I didn't have the desire or effort to do much of anything. 

I wasn't exactly sure when the switch had flipped in me. When I had gone from the optimistic person I once was to the person I was today. 

I thought it might have been Finn's death. But even after I had lost the most important person in my life, I still had hope. So, that led me to think that it was upon losing the second most important person that all my optimism had faded.

I knew that I still had Bellamy, but in a way it felt that I had lost him. Hell, it felt like I had lost everyone. Even Octavia, who was still by my side. The two of us were both too damaged now for things to remain the way they had been. We were all lost it seemed. 

Night had now fallen and I had yet to return to the group. 

I had spent the last couple of hours alone, standing on the deck of the large ship watching as the waves crashed around me. I had never seen the ocean, and staring into it brought not only a sense of calm, but a sense of anxiety. It was so big, so mysterious. 

For a split second, I wondered what it would be like to jump. Would things be easier if I just I just gave myself up to the ocean?

No, my thoughts snapped back at me, causing me to push myself away from the railing. 

I let the sound of the waves fill my ears as I finally turned my back to the water, beginning to make my way back toward my friends. 

I was so caught up in my own thoughts as I made my way through the rig, that I barely noticed the trail of blood at first. It was only when one of my feet slipped in the red substance that I realized. 

Panic consumed me as my eyes flickered forward, following the trail that led toward the part of the rig that my friends and I were brought in on. Please don't let my friends be dead. 

I was running before I knew it, only navigating my way through the unfamiliar territory by following the trail of blood. It was getting worse, meaning whoever it was was really hurt. 

As I turned the final corner, the corridor opened up to the part of the deck where the container that had shipped us over here sat on. And there I also found the source of the blood. 

It was the girl who had been telling that story earlier, the one Jasper had seemed so taken by. "Oh my God." I gasped, instantly rushing toward where she lay, dragging herself across the ground. 

I dropped to my knees beside her, pinpointing the wound as an arrow sticking from her back...someone had shot her?

She looked up at me, her eyes glassy as she let out ragged breaths, "Your...friends..."

My hands shot out, instantly applying pressure to where the blood was leaking from. "What's your name?" I questioned, my worried eyes meeting hers.

She swallowed and even that seemed painful. "S-Shay." she answered, her voice weak.

I nodded, my hands still pressed over the wound. "You're going to be okay, Shay. I've got you."

A small smile came to her face as she shook her head. "Your friends." she repeated, her eyes flickering to the shipping container. "Get them."

My head swivelled between her and the container. "They're in there?" I confirmed, not wanting to leave her unless I knew for sure.

She nodded, "Get them out."

Guilt consumed me at the thought of leaving her, even just for a second. As I looked down at her, she gave me another small nod. "Go."

"I'll be right back." I promised. "Just hold on, Shay."

As I stood to leave, her hand shot out to weakly grab onto my arm. "Machine room." she whispered, her eyelids beginning to droop. 

I didn't question her, knowing I needed to move as fast as possible. Within seconds I was rushing over to the container, my bloody hands shaking as I scrambled to open it. 

Finally, I managed to pry open the doors, being met with the sight of Clarke, Octavia and Bellamy standing there staring back at me.

"Avery, you're bleeding." Was the very first thing Clarke said, her eyes locked on the blood that now coated my hands and torso as all three of them rushed out toward me. 

"It's not mine!" I yelled, already on my way back to Shay. "Come here and help!" I begged, knowing I could use an extra set of hands if we wanted to save her life. 

But when I reached Shay, I felt my heart drop. 

She lay there unmoving, her eyes wide and staring up at the sky. In the two minutes I had left her, she had died...alone. 

"No." I whispered, numbly noting the rest of my friend's arrivals at my side. 

"That's the girl that Jasper..." Clarke trailed off, her voice gentle. 

"Yeah." I whispered, bending down to lightly close Shay's eyes. "Her name was Shay."

As I stood back up, I felt my heart drop once again. "Wait," I gasped, "Jasper isn't with you." It was more of a statement rather than a question. It was pretty obvious that he wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"Machine room!" I yelled, the last words that Shay had spoken finally resonating with me. "Whoever did this to her, they must have Jasper."

No one else needed convincing, as without so much as another word all of us took off in search of the machine room. 

I wasn't exactly sure what we were going to find when we got there, but I had a feeling it wasn't going to be good. 

-an-

I feel like we are starting to see a whole new side to avery. and while it isn't necessarily positive, I think it could be a good thing in the long run.

let me know what you all thought of this chapter! :)

-maddy xoxox