"You're not mine, and even still you move me in such a way that I lose all control."

~ perry poetry 

"Hey, baby." Dad smiled as I waltzed into the living room. I glanced at the wall clock which read 7 p.m.

"Dad," I greeted him, "How are you home so early?" Dad was an investment banker and he typically worked long hours during the week which is why it was odd that he was home so soon.

"Your mother and I have to go to some dinner so I had to take the night off," he explained before adding, "Oh, I got you those caramel cupcakes from that bakery you love." He pointed towards the coffee table while fixing his maroon tie in the round mirror.

"Daddy." I embraced him, "That's so sweet!" I gushed, picking up one of the beautifully decorated cupcakes and biting into it. My eyes rolled back into my sockets as I savored it, bite after bite.

Both our heads turned when we heard the front door slam. I furrowed my brows and turned to see. "You get home right this instant! I don't want to hear another word from you, Jonah. Home. Now!" Mom yelled into her phone before tossing her belongings onto the couch.

Dad and I waited for her to explain her erratic behavior. "Guess what I found in your son's room this morning." Mom dug through her Louis Vuitton purse, only to reveal a tiny plastic bag that seemed to contain weed. Dad's features began to turn red, his nostrils flaring as his eyes enlarged by quite a margin.

Just then, Jonah rushed in through the front door, his eyes zeroing in on the packet of weed that Dad had snatched out of Mom's hand.

"I can explain," he tried to reason.

"You can explain?!" The way Dad's voice was climbing octaves made me wince for Jonah's sake.

"How can you just waste your life like this? This is the height of it, Jonah! You're grounded for the rest of the year!" Mom scolded him.

Jonah's eyes locked with mine and my heart sank seeing him being treated like that. I had to intervene. "Wait, Dad," I tried to speak.

"You stay out of this, Ariel," Dad snapped at me.

Breathe.

Jonah was at a loss for words. Without thinking, I stepped between Dad and him. "It isn't his." I gulped, my white lie stuck in my throat, "It's mine. I hid it in his room because I figured Mom wouldn't go there."

"What? No, Ariel. Don't." Jonah shook his head in an attempt to stop me.

"It's okay, Jonah. You don't need to cover for me anymore. It really is mine. If you don't believe me you can always ask Stacy, she knows I used to smoke up in high school. Besides, why would I lie?" I felt unsure but my voice came out in a rather convincing way.

"I don't know what to say to you." Dad scoffed, his tone bitter. "Is this what you do at college? Party and get high? I could've expected this from Jonah, but you? I just-"

"I'm sorry, Dad. I really am." I feigned guilt and shame.

"Get out of my sight," he said in a low tone, as if he was exercising a lot of restraint.

I had a fair idea of what the consequences would have been if I stepped in to protect Jonah, so I exited the house before matters escalated. I inhaled the scent of the summer night, strolling down the street. I didn't know why I chose to save Jonah, I didn't even know how I found the courage to take the blame, but I did. And for some reason, I didn't regret it. Besides, summer break would be over soon and Mom and Dad would forget the whole thing.

Breathe.

I reminded myself. I inhaled a deep breath and pushed all my thoughts away, trying to clear my head. Midway down an alley, I heard a handful of people arguing loudly, a few of them shoving each other.

Thud. Crash. Bang.

My heart lurched out of my ribcage. I froze. Panic set in, my vision became hazy. Jittery palms and deep breaths accompanied me; stuck to the ground. In their line of sight, vulnerable. Before I could blink, scream or run, a hand clasped over my mouth, muffling my cries for help. My heartbeat skyrocketed as fear set in.

No. No. No.

Breathe.

Whoever it was had me pressed against their body. One hand around my waist, the other covering my mouth. My captor slowly guided us backward until we were consumed by the shadows. A wave of cigarette smoke enveloped my nostrils as we continued stepping further back. Moments later a rusted grill appeared before us, behind which I was being held captive. I began struggling in the iron-clad grasp, my voice strangled, trying to flee from the constraints.

Inhale. Exhale.

"Shh." A feathery gust of breath tickled my earlobe causing goosebumps to appear all over my body. I immediately registered that it was a man. He used his left arm, which was wrapped around my waist, to press my body closer against his. I could feel his warmth radiating between us as I gulped, squeezing my eyes shut to calm my nerves. But I couldn't. 

Panic-laden eyes. A clenched heart. Breathless pants. Skin to skin with a stranger.

Fucking breathe.

I inhaled deeply through my nose before snapping my eyes back open.

Think.

It was pointless to struggle in such a situation. He had a clear advantage. A shiver crept up my spine but I shrugged it off in an attempt to tame my wild heartbeat. Despite how caged I was, his grip wasn't harsh enough to be painful. It was undoubtedly dangerous but in some ways, it was unbelievably gentle. It was probably his way of gaining my trust.

Don't trust a stranger.

"I won't hurt you, little mermaid." I shuddered when I felt his lips graze the spot under my earlobe as he spoke. His words came out painstakingly slow, in a tone which was somehow lower than a whisper.

Little mermaid?

I frowned. He knew me. It was someone who knew me. My breathing morphed into short desperate pants. I couldn't trust him. I couldn't take his word for it.

In. Out. In. Out. In. Out.

He began to loosen his grip on my mouth but not before he warned me in a dangerously low voice, "Don't make a sound." He used his right hand, which was previously on my mouth, to tuck my hair behind my left ear, clearing it away from my sweaty neck and propping it onto my right shoulder. I stifled a gasp when his breath blew against my perspiring skin.

Warmth.

I spun from my right to face him but I couldn't see his sharp features in the darkness.

Think.

I was quick to raise my knee, ready to attack but he was quicker. Fuck. I was interrupted by his hand once again but this time I was facing him. In one swift motion, he pinned me against the wall.

Breathe.

I needed to breathe.

He was so close.

His wet lips lingered near my ear, his voice lower than anything I had ever heard before. "Don't. I won't fucking hurt you." I suppressed a shudder when he hissed. I could feel his jaw clench and unclench as if he was slowly chewing on a piece of gum. The side of his face pressed against mine, our chests rising and falling in sync. His scent was a mixture of smoke and cinnamon which made me gulp.

The abrupt thumping of multiple footsteps neared us and simultaneously his body stiffened. We were so close to each other, it was hard not to notice. My brows knitted together in confusion. The footsteps were accompanied by indistinct voices and the sound of a motorcycle revving.

"The fucker went that way," one of them remarked. As they passed us, the light of the motorcycle reflected in my captor's eyes for a fleeting second. It was brief, like lightning, but it was enough to reveal the deep in his amber eyes.

I gasped.

Tobias.

"Wait," a feminine voice sneered, "I heard something."

His hand pressed down with greater force to subdue my astonishment. With wide eyes, I was able to finally see him, despite the dim lighting.

Flat against the wall, with nothing between us, we held our breaths to become one with the shadows. I squeezed my eyes shut, in the hope that they wouldn't see us, which was as effective as pulling over a blanket to hide from monsters as a child.

I counted in my head.

One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six...

"He's heading west, down there," another voice called out.

Once the footsteps receded and the danger had passed, I felt the warmth of his body recoil from mine, and suddenly, I realized just how much I had liked it. Suppressing my overwhelming feelings, my raspy voice echoed, "Tobias," I said breathlessly, trailing behind him as he led us back into the alley.

Under the street light, I was finally able to appreciate his tousled hair and his sculpted features. His cheek was slightly bruised and his knuckles were a mixture of red, black, and blue. I gulped, not being able to avert my gaze from his abysmal eyes but my mind couldn't help but remind me of how mercilessly he had kept punching his opponent yesterday. I attempted to mask my shock when I saw his shirt, stained with blood.

Breathe.

"What's going on?" I frowned, expecting him to say something. Anything.

All that he did was stuff his hands into his pockets and stormed away. When he didn't stop, I started following him, "What the hell? I'm talking to you!" I scoffed, "Why were those people after you? Why did you pull me out of the street like that?"

That did it.

He stopped in his tracks. His eyes finally found mine but they weren't emotionless like before, instead, they were blazing with anger. Thunder in his eyes, a storm in his stride, I unconsciously cowered back, frightened.

He halted a few feet away from me at the sight of my fear but said nothing. I let out a shaky breath, mumbling, "Never mind, I've already had a long day." Walking away felt right. I muttered under my breath as I put distance between us, "What was I thinking trying to talk to someone like him anyway."

"Someone like me?"

I froze when I realized he had heard my condescending comment. I turned to face him and for a split second, I saw something in his eyes. I couldn't decipher what it was but it seemed like he almost got hurt by what I said.

"I didn't mean it-"

But he was quick to cut me off. "Stop pretending like you know me," he said in a low voice, making sure to enunciate each word before taking a step towards me.

His threatening tone fed my courage. "I think I've seen enough in the past five minutes to have a fairly good idea about what kind of person you are," I said while stepping forward confidently.

"And what kind of person is that?" He challenged me to answer, moving another step in my direction.

"A dangerous one." I inched another step closer, my voice a mere whisper, as the gap between us became non-existent.

"Dangerous, huh?" His face retained its stoic expression, our eyes interlocked with the fiercest intensity.

The sound of my ringtone echoing brought an end to the moment as we both instinctively retreated. I heaved a sigh, staring down at Jonah's name. I answered the call, holding my phone against my ear, only to discover that Tobias had disappeared when I looked back up.

————

You're a diamond.

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Love, Ari