-

You didn't know how much time between you finishing your rant and now, but suddenly, you heard the doorbell ring and you froze. Horror spread across your face as you dropped your hands from your face.

You slowly looked back at your front door and the your mind started to flood. No, no, no, please don't tell me it's him. You really hoped that wasn't who you thought it was. Your day couldn't get any worse.

The weight of who could be on the other side of that door was starting to press on down on you as you cautiously approached the door. With every step, you prayed that it wasn't Levi. If it was, how much of that could he have possibly heard?

Was he standing there the whole time? You were scared to find out. You were embarrassed enough. You hesitated before looking at the screen of the touchpad next to the door, seeing who was outside through the camera that was installed.

But when you saw who was waiting outside, a wave of relief washed over you. Erwin. You let out a long, quiet sigh. His familiar face was exactly what you needed right now.

Seeing him right now was exactly what you needed right now. It's weird because somehow he always seemed to show up when you needed him the most, and there was a certain comfort to his presence you just couldn't place.

You were happy to see someone in your family just on the other side of that door that you knew was on your side. For obvious reasons, there just wasn't a good opportunity back at the memorial to talk about what happened, so you were happy he was here. You know you can always count on him, and you hoped that never had to change.

You swallowed and raised your hand to tap the intercom button. "Hey, Erwin. give me a second," You said, and you know he heard what you said because he nodded in acknowledgement and sent you a thumbs up.

You couldn't explain it, but it was incredibly comforting to know that he wasn't just physically there, but there for you in a way very people in your life could. He could help you figure out what to do next.

But even so, you needed a few seconds. You weren't ready to let him in just yet. You want a minute to collect yourself. You took a deep breath and stood still for a moment, trying to regain your composure. That rant took a lot out of you and you didn't want him to see you so out of sorts, even more than before.

He was probably just as confused about Grisha's death as you were and if you two could be there for each other, it would make it so much easier.

When you opened that door, you wanted to be in a space where you could have a rational conversation and didn't need another explosion of emotions, especially not with Erwin, who came all the way down here to help. Not when it feels like everything else is already slipping from your control.

Therefore, knowing you couldn't keep Erwin waiting out there any longer, whether you were ready or not, you forced yourself to look calm and reached for the door handle. You pulled the door open slowly and Erwin came fully into view, standing in front of you.

He was there, standing in the doorway, with his usual calm and collected demeanor that you were actively jealous of.

Even if he was looking at you with compassion and concern, his piercing blue eyes looked over you, as if searching for something. It's as if he was trying to see what was going on inside your head.

You sent him a weakened, yet warm, smile and got your voice to work. "Hey," You said, sounding a little less confident than you thought you would. But it still didn't quite reach your eyes and your facade was still up.

"I'm sorry, I really wasn't expecting anyone right now-" You started, but you saw Erwin chuckle lightheartedly as he shook his head, raising his hand and waving it a bit.

"It's fine, you don't need to apologize. I know I'm stopping by here a bit unannounced, but I just....wanted to see how you were," He said, and his voice didn't falter like yours did.

You nodded and stepped aside so that he can come into your apartment. You watched as he came inside and then closed the door after him. The two of you just remained, standing in front of each other in your hallway, not going further into your apartment just yet.

You inhaled sharply as you hesitated to answer, crossing your arms in front of you. You just settled by shrugging, trying to brush it off, but being truthful about what you were feeling nonetheless.

"I'm not sure how well i can answer that, but right now...I think I'm okay. Just, you know, tired. It's been...such a long day," You breathed out your last couple words and uncrossed one of your arms so that you can run your hand back through your hair.  But Erwin could see right through your words.

He didn't miss the way your voice trembled, how your body language showed that you were trying to hold back every emotion in your body. But he still didn't want to push it, though.

He never did, not once when he's known you for years and he's grown to know you, what you're like, how to act around you. How to comfort you and be there for you. All he did was simply take a step forward across the hallway, glancing back at you with a warm smile and softened eyes.

You smiled back and quickly started following after him, catching up to him as the two of you walked and moved into your living room.

"Well, do you want some coffee? Tea? Anything?" You asked as you turned your head to look up at him, trying to match his comforting smile, but Erwin could tell it was forced.

You weren't being very convincing. But, even so, he took you up on your offer and thought about it for a second before answering. "Some coffee would be nice," He said, and you nodded. Making it to the sitting area, you stopped walking and turned to Erwin and your features instinctively softened when you looked at him.

Even if the voice in the back of your head told you that you should have offered only tea instead since its nighttime, but you shoved them back when you know that Erwin will head right back to his office after this and he drinks coffee at night regularly to keep him up.

You know about his habit but now wasn't the time to dwell on it, as much as you continuously wished he took more care of himself and that he didn't overwork himself. You care a lot about him but now wasn't the time to make a big deal about it. So you simply tried to make small talk or start up a conversation in the meantime.

"As usual, huh? Still drinking coffee at night? I'll make it decaf for you. You need to get some sleep later," You said lightheartedly and with concern laced in your voice, trying to lighten the mood. Erwin simply chuckled and nodded, knowing that you constantly show concern over him and his work habits.

"You know me so well. What would I do without you?" He said with a smile, appreciating that you were making him a drink that'll be lighter for him once he goes back to work, or maybe go home and get some sleep. You nodded assertively and feeling your mood begin to lift already. Just talking to him about anything helped so much.

"Even more sleep deprived probably. Make yourself at home, sit wherever you want. I'll be right back and we can talk," You said. You saw him smile and chuckle at your words. He noticed how you were trying to continue putting up that same facade as you opened the door, even if it had gotten a lot better since the two of you let him in, his expression still didn't waver.

He nodded, you did the same and turned on your heel, heading towards the kitchen. You heard his footsteps moving behind you and the sound of the couch deflating a bit as he sat on it and got comfortable. You decided to focus on the task at hand.

As you reached your kitchen, which was just behind your living room, you walked around the island and started busying yourself with the coffee machine, doing the standard procedure you usually did to make coffee for Erwin, in this case. just hearing he sound of the water bubbling through the filter made your body ease a bit.

Before Grisha died, you realized you can't remember the last time that you felt as lost as you did now. Everything that's happened that has just been piling one on top of the other was starting to feel like it was unbearably crushing you.

You had so many unresolved emotions that made you just want to disappear and leave all of these responsibilities behind, but you can't.

But now that Erwin was here, in your living room and ready to talk, it felt like a light was finally penetrating. Giving you hope. But you still wondered what about all of this he wanted to discuss.

Was he here for you? For you to elaborate on what you said about Grisha and his death back at the memorial? Did he want answers? You want them too, more than anything, so you hoped that talking with Erwin would help you feel more sane.

Eventually the coffee was done, you grabbed a cup for him along with a saucer underneath, poured the coffee into it and then started heading back to the living room. You could see that Erwin was settled in the couch, with his broad shoulders facing you.

You wanted to get to him and start discussing this because you didn't think you could continue on with this awkward silence for long. Thankfully, you were making your way around the couch Erwin was in soon enough and he straightened up when he saw you.

He watched as you sat down in front of him and handed him the cup of coffee. He gratefully took it from your hands, and you watched as Erwin took a sip of his coffee, enjoying the taste of it, before reaching over, putting the cup on the coffee table, and then turning to look at you again.

You let out a breath and smiled nervously because you could tell that he wanted to say something. He was leaning the side of his body against the couch, laying one arm on top of the couch, up until he finally started talking.

You watched the way he lightly drummed his fingers against the couch as you leaned your back against the cushions. "I know it may be stupid to ask, but how have you been holding up? Things didn't end very well at the memorial," He asked, voice gentle but direct as he broke the silence.

You let out a shaky breath and smiled nervously as you raised one hand to rub against the back of your head. Your eyes focused on the steam coming out of Erwin's coffee cup ahead of you as you tried to think of an answer.

"I...I really don't know. I'm just managing. There's nothing I can do in this very moment, so...I just need time. To think of a plan," You said, realizing that at some point you'll have to do something about all of this and you didn't know if you could.

There was so much to think about. You groaned and tilted your head back, putting both of your hands in your face. His face softened with concern as he looked at you, not meaning to have sparked this reaction from you.

The warmth in his eyes was still there but they tinged with worry.  "God, it's just...so much. With everything going on. I can barely keep track. I can't register anything these days. I don't even feel like myself," You said, dropping your hands from your face, but you continued looking up.

"I know. Nothing has been the same since Grisha died, and the memorial was just...it was rough. You're carrying too much on your shoulders, y/n. " Erwin said, lightly referring to you hearing that you had to get married to get the inheritance and then running straight towards Levi and proposing.

Erwin assumed its because you felt like you had to hold all the weight and pressure on your own and that's why you did it, but of course he kept it vague and didn't outright say it because he had a feeling you were still processing it and that it just wasn't you back there. You got carried away, and you were aware of that.

You turned your head to the side to look at him, only to see that his blue eyes were locked onto yours with understanding that cut straight through the facade and the wall you had built around yourself to repair the damage that had been done.

"Look, I'm just so, so tired Erwin," You said, with your voice sounding weak and defeated, barely above a whisper and Erwin's eyebrows pinched together worriedly. "I'm just so tired of pretending like I know exactly what to do, like I have it all figured out, but I don't. You saw how much of a mess I was back there, everyone did. I don't know what to do now," You said to Erwin with pain deep in your eyes, and he watched as you sat up again ran a hanc back through your hair again with exasperation.

"It's as if everything I was already juggling before wasn't hard enough already," You breathed out with a frown on your face as you looked down at your lap, fiddling with your fingers, feeling Erwin's eyes on you.

A few seconds passed and Erwin didn't say anything at first but instead, he extended his hand and put it on your back, with a warm but firm hold on you as he began to rub up and down your back. You raised your head in surprise at the sudden contact but you instantly felt it ease the tension in your body.

"You don't have to figure it out. At least not right now. Nobody's asking you to. And i've been telling you this for years, even before Grisha died. He tried to get through to you a lot more times than I ever did," Erwin said with a wholehearted smile, making you chuckle once you heard his last few words, knowing he was right.

Didn't mean the pressure ever went away. It's always been there and you haven't been able to control it no matter how hard you tried to take it easy.

"If you want to talk, i'm here. If you want someone to lean on, I'm here too," Erwin reassured you and his words hung around in the air for a moment as you felt his words start to come into effect inside you. You felt something crack. This was the time to unload and just let it all out before it consumed you into a path of no return.

You just shook your head and felt a bitter laugh escape your lips. There was just so much to say and you'd been waiting for the opportunity to feel like you could say what you were thinking out loud, but now it felt like you didn't even know where to start. How could you even begin?

"I mean...there's so much I wanted to say but now I have no way to get it out. How can I even begin to explain what was going through my head back there? What I felt when the realization of what happened to Grisha just hit me like a truck? It just feels like a big blur," You started, propping up your elbow on the arm of your couch and leaning your head against your hand. In the corner of your eye you watched as Erwin reached over to grab his cup of coffee and take another sip before putting it back down.

Now, it felt like a time to start putting everything together, and connect the pieces of the puzzle, so Erwin decided he would start imputing thoughts and doubts of his own to see if that helped your train of thought. If history was any indication, you two were always on the same wave-length so the two of you having similar theories wouldn't be too far off.

"Trust me, nobody could believe it. That Grisha was killed over an audit he set up before his death?" Erwin started, and you nodded to his words, feeling on just as much disbelief as he was.

"I know," You said, raising one hand and rubbing the back of your neck. "And now..." Erwin started, and when he saw you nodding along to his words, he knew the two of you had been thinking of the same thing since back at the memorial.

But he trailed off as another thought surfaced in his mind but he didn't say it because he didn't know if it was too early to bring it up or if it would strike a nerve, but somehow, he trusted his gut upon looking at your body language and reactions and just decided to say it.

"And now the same person that killed him is after you too?" He asked, not knowing if he should be asking that, knowing how fragile you are to the revelation having been made not that long ago. You knew someone was out to get you, just not the same one that killed Grisha, or maybe it was the same person. Who knows? You needed to know.

But it seems that Erwin underestimated you because as soon as he mentioned that, the fact that someone's trying to kill you, your entire face change. It seems like this is the one thing you were absolutely sure of  and didn't have any doubts on. He saw you turn your head to look at him as you leaned back against the couch with a sigh.

"I should've put it together sooner. I can't waste any more time. I need to find out who did it. If I get to that person, all of this will be over and I can finally start to...move on, you know?" You said, sounding absolutely sure of what you wanted when it came to this. There was no doubt in your head that you didn't want to live in fear anymore, especially knowing that the enemy was a lot closer than you thought it was. Today proved it.

"How are you going to do that? You're in even more danger now. Today you became even more of a target for whoever is after you," Erwin said as he started to piece together what it is you wanted to do, and he didn't like the sound of it.

He had an idea of what was going on through your head, and even if he didn't blame you at all for wanting to do it, he still worried a lot for you. How can he now when you're in so much danger?

"I'll do exactly what Grisha would have wanted me to do when he gave me the inheritance. I'll become chairwoman and form an audit team myself. It's the only way I can fight back against this.

I can't just wait around for the police to find that killer anymore. I'm taking matters into my own hands for once," You said, your voice firm, and Erwin sighed. This is exactly what he was afraid of. You were throwing yourself into the lion's den.

"No, Y/n. You should stay out of it. Take precautions, stay out of the public eye. You can't let this lunatic find you, or much less, pick a fight with Zeke. You know he wanted that spot," Erwin said, knowing exactly the kind of people you'd be challenging the moment you agreed to be chairwoman and you fulfilled the terms that Grisha left for you to be able to do it.

Erwin works in close quarters with Zeke's branch in the company and you didn't. You had no idea what you're getting yourself into and its not like Erwin didn't believe in you, but this was dangerous. He just wanted you to be safe and let this blow over.

"And let Zeke become chairman? No way. Do you know how insufferable he'll be if i just give it to him? Him, Karina, and Floch will never stop rubbing it in my face," You said, cringing at the thought of it.

You could barely stand any of them now, so you didn't want to imagine what it would be like if you handed over the inheritance to them and they got to gloat on how they got through to you or whatever, or that you made the right choice.

"And besides, I'm already in danger. Might as well do something about it and not stay here twiddling my thumbs waiting to die. I won't be at ease if I just stay hidden. I act on it. I'm doing it for Grisha, too" You said, refusing to back down, and your words only made Erwin fill with anguish for you. This was new territory for you. He wished you'd just think it through a little bit more.

You saw the worry still not leaving Erwin's face and you sighed. "Erwin, I can't possibly be safe until that psycho is caught. Even if I stay out of it, I'll still be in just as much danger. I'm not afraid," You said and Erwin just stared at you, conflicted.

You say that now, but what if things just continue to escalate? You say you can't be at ease doing nothing to solve this, but Erwin won't be at ease if you put yourself out there like that. "I'm serious, Y/n," He said, and you let out a huff, looking at Erwin in the eye. You can see why he would be worried but you were tired of standing in the sidelines and waiting for someone else to solve your issues for you.

At least you have Levi. You have protection. It's not like you were jumping into this not knowing what it entails. You were ready to take this on.

And besides, there was another reason you felt like this was your duty. Like it was your responsibility. You felt as if you were the reason all of this happened, or at least that's what your brain has set in stone in your mind.

"Erwin, since this started, I've managed to convince myself that this is..." You started, refusing to make eye contact with Erwin, but you could still feel his eyes on you as he waited to continue. "I've felt like this is my fault. Or that I'm at least partly at fault," You said, and you heard Erwin sigh. He couldn't believe you were taking on the blame for this too, but he had a feeling there was a reason as to why you were taking the burden of Grisha's death, so he let you continue.

"A couple days before he died, I'd asked him if he was okay and if there was anything he wanted to tell me. He'd been acting weird. He said he was fine and that I should let it go, and I did, but I shouldn't have, I should've known something was wrong" You said, feeling like you should have pushed harder for him to tell you and he wouldn't have had to face what he wasn't telling you about alone so that he could spare you any worry.

But if it meant he would've still been alive today, then you would've endured that worry ten times over if it was necessary. You looked at Erwin as you swallowed a lump in your throat and you felt heat behind your eyes. "He was killed because he was trying to leave his position to me and knew somebody was after him. I know I can't keep blaming myself because he wouldn't want that, but still...it's so, so hard not to" You said as your voice trembled and you inhaled sharply, looking away again.

"And I know I couldn't have possibly gotten to him in time to stop him from taking those pills and there's nothing I could've done differently, and It took me a while to stop blaming myself for that. But I do blame myself for not having insisted more to make sure that he was okay and he wasn't just saying what I wanted to hear. I warned him something was wrong and he reassured me that everything was okay. I should've trusted what my gut was telling me, but I didn't," You said as you shook your head and gathered up the courage to make eye contact with him. You'll make up for not insisting before with using every last fiber of your being to find that killer for him. Its the least you could do.

Erwin felt like he knew now why you were so insistent on being involved in this inheritance issue, but what he didn't understand quite yet, is why you saw it that way.

He wanted to understand, but he didn't think he could because it was something so embedded between you and Grisha that the reasoning behind it will take a while to become clearer for him to understand. He didn't want you to think as you involving yourself as you redeeming yourself because you've done nothing wrong.

Nobody could have seen this coming and even if he understood some of it, he wanted to help you see things in a different light and not as retribution or because you feel like you owe it to Grisha to solve this case.

He knew you and Grisha had relationship that ran deep and that most would take a while to comprehend, but Erwin knew for the fact that Grisha didn't give you the inheritance so you went to war with Zeke.

All Grisha wanted was a better future for you, his children, and Erwin was sure that the inheritance was the biggest gift of all. But if there was truly no changing your mind, Erwin would try his best to try and be there for you until the end and reassure you that you were not to blame for this.

It was out of your control, it was already determined, Grisha didn't tell anyone about someone being after him, and there was no way you could've known.

Grisha was hiding it from you for the same reason that Erwin was trying to get you to stay away from the chaos and the danger. But knowing how hell-bent you were about this, there was just no stopping you, right?

All he could do now was remind you that moving forward and repeating as many times as its necessary that none of this happened because of you.

"Y/n, you know that's not true. This was going to happen eventually and I know deep down that you know it, too," Erwin said, but it still didn't sway you.

As much as tears were threatening to leave your eyes, there was courage and certainty behind them and once you made the decision, nobody will ever be able to change your mind.

"You should be blaming the one who killed him instead, not yourself. It'll only hurt you more and it kills me to see you destroy yourself like that," He said from the bottom of his heart and you simply looked at him with pained eyes.

Of course you would blame the killer for doing this, that would never change, but what you felt like you had some fault in is not intervening sooner. But you supposed that Erwin was right.

This was going to happen eventually but you hated that it had to be this way and why he had to die at all. If you couldn't do anything then, you sure as hell can do something now.

"Erwin. I need to do this. My conscience tells me that this is a good thing, trust me," You said, making it clear to Erwin that you were not changing your mind about this. Even if you weren't doing anything right away or right this minute, you were officially committed to it in your head.

You watched as Erwin inhaled and then let out a deep sigh as he let himself fall back on the couch, raising one hand to rub on his forehead. If that's what you wanted to do, then he would be by your side every single step of the way no matter what.

He would be supportive, do anything he can to help you solve this. If it made you happy and if it put you at ease to find who did this to Grisha and to find on your own terms who was after you, then he'd do anything he can to make it happen.

As a couple seconds of silence passed between the two of you, and with Erwin knowing that you weren't going to change your mind, suddenly another thought crawled into his head.

Something he'd been meaning to ask since the memorial because he'd definitely felt eyes on him when he was talking to you then. "Also..." Erwin started as he sat up and you turned your head to look at him again, noticing he had a very pensive look on his face.

You turned your body and leaned on the couch on your side propping up an elbow on the couch cushion and leaning your head against your hand, looking at him with anticipation.

Erwin lightly cleared his throat and tried to find the right words to put this, because especially after the whole proposal, it was harder for him to ignore. "That guy that was with you at the funeral," He started and your face caught on immediately to who he was talking about.

You supposed it wouldn't be too long until he asked about that. You hadn't exactly told anyone in your family circle about you meeting Levi or him becoming your bodyguard, so you should have expected questions about him to come up eventually.

"That guy that you..." Erwin trailed off in a suggestive tone that made you quickly realize that he was talking about you proposing to him. You chuckled and let out a huff, using your free hand to start fiddling with the embroidery on your pillows, looking away from Erwin.

You won't be able to escape that, were you? But even so, it's only fair you explain it to Erwin if he was curious about it, even if it still wasn't 100% clear to you. Knowing that you got the memo of who he was talking about, Erwin decided to continue.

"Is that the guy you went on a date with?" Erwin asked, and his question made you freeze for a second before you looked up from your pillows and made eye contact with him. Erwin's blue eyes were curious but stern, and they were burning into yours.

It took you a couple seconds, but you eventually nodded. It was so crazy to you how you'd gone on an accidental blind date with Levi not that long ago and now he was your bodyguard.

You were still trying to wrap your head around that too. Seeing your nod, Erwin reciprocated your gesture, despite your confirmation leaving a slight pang in his chest. He ignored it.

But then, he started getting into his thoughts again, trying to see if he can remember the raven-haired man's name. He remembers you saying it when you proposed to him, so after a couple seconds of trying to remember, it suddenly came to him.

He hoped he was right. "What was his name? Levi, was it?" Erwin asked, and you inhaled sharply before nodding again, lowering your arm that was propped up on the couch and you began fiddling with your fingers nervously, avoiding eye contact with him again.

You didn't know how the conversation suddenly steered to be about Levi, but you didn't want to talk about him right now. It just reminded you of what happened and you just wanted to think about it some other day.

But you knew that just from Erwin asking who he was, he'd want to know more about Levi, so you'd just endure this conversation, answer what he wanted to know. You could do that.

"Look, I get that you were...desperate at the moment, but didn't you two just go on one date? How come you proposed to him?" Erwin asked, in all seriousness. He wasn't trying to diminish or upset you. Not at all.

He was just very confused as to what kind of relationship you had with Levi that he wasn't aware of that made you feel comfortable enough to propose to him on the spot. It's clear you haven't known him for that long. It just all seems very...fast, and Erwin?

He's always felt protective over you. That wouldn't stop now, especially in the situation that you're in. It just comes naturally to him to be worried about you.

But at the same time that we were worrying about yours and Levi's relationship, you were thinking about something entirely different than he was. All you could think was; Great. Yet another person reminding you that you were desperate to do that back there. The hits just keep on coming.

You could still answer his question, though. Despite how much you hated yourself for the decisions you've made lately, and even if it was still a little bit of a grey area and a little hazy whether you should be mad at him or at yourself, there was one thing you just couldn't deny when it came to him.

There was one thing you were certain of when it came to Levi in the little time you've known him that has assured you of how much you can trust him. He's proven that to you many times already, and this whole thing wouldn't change that.

"Levi...he's- he's a lot more than that to me. A lot has happened between me and him over the last couple days that I haven't told anyone about. That's why, even if it was just a spur-of-the-moment kind of thing, at the time he seemed like the best option," You admitted and your words registered in Erwin's head.

He didn't know if it was his mind twisting your words but it's almost as if you were saying that you....no, that wasn't what you said. But he still felt the need to ask you what he was thinking just bubbling up inside him.

"Do you..." Erwin started and you tilted your head to the side slightly as you waited for him to continue. He wasn't necessarily struggling to find the words, but he was trying to figure out in his head if he should ask or not. But eventually, he just went for it.

"Do you have feelings for him?" Erwin asked gently, catching you off guard and your fingers stilled on the embroidery as your heart skipped. The question felt like a sudden weight on your chest.

You forced out a laugh but it didn't quite reach your eyes. "No. Not at all. It's not like that. I have a different kind of relationship with him," You said, but even as you did, you felt a thought crawling in from the back of your head telling you that it wasn't the whole truth.

Despite your bickering with him, your mind wandered to his quiet gestures, how he vowed to keep you safe, making the growing warmth in your body tell you otherwise.

But you knew for a fact that all of that was just you feeling grateful for what he's done for you. It's just that, and nothing else. But what about what you said before telling Erwin that you liked Levi?

You paused for a bit in your words as your face grew softer as you recalled everything that Levi has done for you over the past few days, whether it was for you or for the sake of his tattoo, you recognized it all the same.

"He just- He saved me. Multiple times, over the last couple days with all the attempts that have been made to kill me recently," You said, explaining to Erwin that there wasn't much else to Levi and yours relationship but that.

You just felt grateful for his presence. He didn't just save you from being killed, but also when Grisha died. He witnessed when you found him, took you back home, and he thinks you didn't know but you know he stayed until morning so that he could switch with Hange.

You had woken up a little earlier than you thought you would, so when you saw him outside in your couch asleep, you'd quickly retreated back in your room until Hange came into your room and you'd put it together that Levi was gone by then. You didn't forget that.

Erwin nodded as he slowly started to understand and piece it all together. "And that's why you hired him as your bodyguard," He said as it all clicked. He was starting to see why all of this was bothering you so much.

He was starting to see maybe why Levi's rejection took a toll on you, despite how much you tried to play it off as something else.

You nodded at his words and suddenly the words that were coming up in your throat suddenly made you look down bashfully at your pillows as you began to fiddle with them again. Heat arose in your face when you realized you haven't admitted this to anyone, even Levi.

You looked up at Erwin and he quickly began to study your face, seeing how just at the thought of Levi, your entire demeanor changed.

Your eyes grew softer, there was a warm smile on your face, your gaze moved away from him as you looked off somewhere else with a dazed look in your eye. And you were still denying there wasn't something there?

Erwin was skeptical but he pushed it aside as he listened to you. "I realized that...Levi, he- he can keep me safe during all of this better than anyone else," You admitted, quickly realizing that whether you were mad at him or not, the fact that he was the only person who could look out for you with all these threats in your life did not change.

You were annoyed that all of this was happening, sure, but you really did understand his perspective. He didn't want to get married, and you understood that more than anyone, even if the circumstances had changed.

You were definitely more upset at yourself than him. You were being irrational and unreasonable before, taking it out on him. You know that now. You got carried away.

But as he heard you say this, Erwin was left at a loss. He didn't realize Levi had become someone so important to you in such a short amount of time, and he hated to admit it but he wished he could have made it a lot clearer to you that he could protect you too.

You swallowed and Adam's apple bobbed slightly as he looked away from you, seeing you turn to look at him again, so now he was the one avoiding eye contact with you.

Silence took over the room after you revealed that to Erwin you quickly realized that it felt like the tension in the room had risen far too much already. You just wanted to go to bed now.

The events of today are just catching up to you physically and mentally so you just feel exhausted now. You leaned away from the couch Erwin watched as you stretched your arms up, letting them drop in your lap after, and then turned to look at him.

"I think I'm gonna go to bed now," You said as your words were followed by a tired yawn that made Erwin chuckle as he leaned away from the couch too and sat on the edge of it.

You got to your feet, feeling the weight of the day pulling at your limbs. You stretched out your limbs a little more, feeling already far too spent to remain awake for much longer.

Talking to Erwin really did help and it was exactly what you needed. You turned your head back to look at Erwin, seeing him lean forward to pick up his nearly finished cup of coffee.

You watched him stand up too, and out of instinct, you extended your hand to him to take the coffee cup from his hands but your eyebrows furrowed when he moved the cup away from you.

"I'll take care of it. Go get some rest," Erwin said, and you dropped your hands to your sides as you looked at him with disbelief, quickly trying to take the cup again.

"But-" You started, but he moved the coffee cup away from you again and you huffed. Erwin chuckled and gestured with his head over to the door to your room. "I mean it, y/n. Go to bed, I'll take care of it," He said, and you looked at him skeptically before defeat took over your face and you nodded.

"Fine," You said, turning on your heel and walking around your couch, heading straight towards your room, hearing Erwin laughing behind you.

Once you got to your room, you didn't waste time to just go into autopilot and do your bedtime routine. You took a quick shower (deciding against washing your hair) , changed into sweatpants, a hoodie, put on some socks and slippers, brushed your hair, washed your face, brushed your teeth, and so on.

When you were finally done, you stepped out of your bathroom and then decided to step out of your room and see if you could get a glass of water before bed or something. But once you stepped outside your door, expecting Erwin to have left during the time you were in your room, you saw him getting comfortable on your couch.

You walked over to him, standing in front of the couch with your arms crossed and a smile of disbelief crossed your face. "I thought you left. Are you sleeping on the couch or something?" You asked, judging by the way that he was laying over the couch with a pillow behind him and another one that he was hugging in front of him. You crossed your arms in front of you, seeing how unbothered he looked by you finding him like this.

"I won't," He said, and you gave him a look that told him you didn't believe him at all. "I'll stay here, keeping watch all night so you can sleep," Erwin said and your shoulders sank as your eyes softened and smiled at him. He didn't have to do that.

Your apartment had good security and you didn't want him losing more sleep than he already did. You also couldn't believe he was blowing off going back to his office so he can stay here.

Was he really that worried? "Erwin. Stop being so dramatic, i'll be fine," You said as you walked around the couch and stood right in front of him, looking down at him sternly.

Erwin sighed, leaning back up from his laying down position on the couch and looked up at you. "I won't get any sleep if I leave you alone right now. I'd rather keep watch here," Erwin said and you felt your heart warm up at his gesture, but it wasn't necessary.

Even Levi didn't have to be here at night because he didn't need to be, and neither did Erwin. If he wanted to sleep over, he could just go into the guest room like he usually did, but you wouldn't let him stay on the couch all night. "But I've been fine by myself these last few days since the attacks started happening," You countered, hoping he'd listen and trust your judgement.

But you should've expected he'd be more hesitant. "I know, but y/n-" He started, but you put your hand up, cutting him off so that you could finish. "Erwin, you have to trust me on this. If I can't sleep alone in my own apartment, it's no different than not being able to go outside by myself," You said, and you watched as Erwin visibly debated in his head whether to stay or not, but when he stood up and towered over you, he had this look of confidence on his face was worried you.

He wasn't going to give up that easily, right? It's like there was something he was trying to prove but you couldn't put your finger on it.

"Alright, then. I'll be outside the door, then," He said as he walked past you and your mouth dropped open at his words. You turned around and started following after him, not believing what he was saying to you right now.

"No. You're not doing that. I appreciate the gesture, I really do. But go home, I mean it, Erwin," You said, stopping in front of him and crossing your arms again over your chest in defiance. You saw how his resolve faltered the slightest bit as he visibly struggled to leave. He wanted to do this for you so badly.

"How can I, y/n?" He said, defeat coating his voice and you sighed looking at him appreciation and understanding. You knew what he was trying to do, but you wouldn't let him.

You knew that even if he wanted to stay in the guest room, it wouldn't be enough for him because he wanted to be out here in case any attacks happened.

"Do you really think I'd get any sleep knowing you're out here staying awake for me? I can take care of myself," You pointed out, looking at him expectantly and watching bit by bit as he gave in and nodded.

"Okay, fine. I'll go," He said, and you smiled brightly at him. Now you are getting somewhere. You turned your body around, grabbed his jacket that he'd left hung over the couch, and then turned back around to face him.

"Good, now go get some sleep too," You said, handing him his jacket. He reluctantly took it from your hands and nodded. He knew you'd find ways to find out if he really went to bed or not.

"I will," He said and you narrowed your eyes suspiciously, which he noticed, and made him laugh. You didn't believe him.

"Don't look at me like that. I'll get going. Sleep tight, okay?" He said and you nodded, still a little bit skeptical but as long as he said it, that was more than enough for you.

"I'll go see what I can do on my part. Digging through files, doing some research," Erwin said and you smiled in appreciation. Anything that could help get closer to solving this was useful, so you were grateful to have him by your side too to help.

"Thank you. I appreciate that," You said sincerely and after that Erwin stared at you for a couple seconds, thinking of what to say.

"You don't have to thank me. As long as you get to sleep without worry, that's more than enough for me," Erwin said and you couldn't help but feel your entire body warm up with gratitude.

He's always been so considerate and sweet, which is no surprise, since the two of you have known each other since you were kids and he hasn't changed one bit since then.

But a look of recognition quickly took over his face as he remembered something. "Oh, before I forget, give me your phone," He said, and his request knocked you out of your thoughts and caught you off guard, but you still went ahead to grab your phone, unlocked it and handed it over to him.

"What for?" You asked, still wanting to know why he asked for it all of a sudden. You took a couple steps closer to him, standing on one side of him and watched as he went to your contacts app, and going to his own contact at that, scrolling down his contact information that you already had for him.

"I'm adding myself as your emergency contact. So, if you're ever in trouble, I'll know," Erwin said, and you nodded. That was a pretty good idea. You saw as he tapped the button that configured him to be your emergency contact in case anything happens and that was it.

"There," He said, handing your phone back to you. You turned it off and put it in your pocket, turning to look at him again. You wanted him to know that even if he was your emergency contact, you didn't want him worrying so much. All of this would be settled eventually and until then, it's best to not freak out and just remain level-headed.

"Don't worry too much about me. Before today and before you found out, I was safe. I still am. I don't want you staring at your phone waiting for me to call in case of an emergency. I've told you that the security in this building is tight and reliable, right? " You said, letting out a couple laughs at the end of your sentence.

With Levi by your side, you felt a lot safer than you were before he became your bodyguard, and now with Erwin wanting to help too, you felt secure. You know you can handle this if you have them by your side. But you also didn't want him driving himself crazy over this either. You'll be okay.

"Okay. But please, don't bottle things up and keep things to yourself anymore. Before today, I had no idea you were feeling this way about all of this. You don't have to take this on yourself. It's okay to be vulnerable sometimes. You have a lot of people on your side.

You can always count on me," Erwin reassured you and you smiled, nodding. You never doubted for a second that he wasn't there for you. And he made it even clearer now. He meant a lot to you and you didn't want him to turn his whole life around just to make sure you were okay, because you'd feel guilty that he'd feel the need to do that when he doesn't.

"Sometimes its hard for me to understand how you can be okay after everything you've been through," Erwin said and your smile fell a little after he said that, but you let him continue.

"You're stronger than you give yourself credit for, and I do believe you can take care of yourself. Don't forget that, okay? Please, don't misunderstand my worry for me not believing in you. It's just that...a little help never hurts anyone, right?" Erwin said, and your gaze dropped as you looked away for a second.

But he was right. It was hard to believe how you were still standing after taking hit after hit, over and over, in your life. You looked back up at Erwin and he noticed your eyes wavered a bit with uncertainty.

Silence took over the two of you again as Erwin noticed your expression and he realized he could have chosen a few of his words a bit more carefully, so he decided to try and say the last couple of words he had intended to say before.

"Look, I know I'm not perfect and I fall a little short," He started, and your eyebrows creased a little at where he was going with this. "But if you need me to be that person, I'll do my best to fill in for Grisha," He said, and all you could do in response was let out a huff from your lips as a gentle smile came onto your lips.

"You do. You fall way too short," You said with sullenly and Erwin knew you still had a couple more things to say so he let you continue.

He wasn't really bothered by your response because it's true. Measuring up to who Grisha used to be in your life would be a hard task, but he would take up that challenge if it was necessary.

"To fill in for him, you'll have to be a lot surlier and crabby," You said, letting out a grim chuckle, knowing that those traits are what most people knew Grisha for, at least to the rest of the world.

Erwin decided that if you needed someone to lean on like you did with Grisha, and not necessarily emulate the person he used to be, Erwin would happily buy that person.

Erwin chuckled at your words and looked at you fondly, while you reciprocated it and looked at him with warmth and affection, happy that he was here with you. "Don't forget to call me if anything happens, alright? I'll come rushing here if I need to," Erwin said, half-joking, and you nodded, crossing your arms tighter around your body for warmth.

You watched as he turned around and started heading towards the door. Just as he was about the turn the corner on the hallway, he turned his head to look at you and waved at you.

You laughed and uncrossed one of your arms, raising it and waving him goodbye. After that, you saw him turn back towards the door, open it, step out, and close the door behind him.

The thud of the door closing, made you realize you were alone again, but it wasn't like before. Your mindset had changed and so did your perspective just from having spoken to someone and not keeping it all inside like you thought you could continue doing without any consequences to yourself. You tried your best to remember what Erwin said.

Even if Grisha wasn't here anymore, you wouldn't let yourself feel like 16 years ago when you lost your parents. You weren't alone anymore, you had people on your side, you could do this. You knew you could, and you wouldn't let your doubts come in the way again.

Before you could let yourself get carried away, you shook your head and raised one hand to run it back through your hair and come back down to Earth. The sooner you could head to bed and leave this whole day behind, the better.

You were going to think about one step at a time and not get ahead of yourself, which is what got you in this whole dilemma in the first place. One thing at a time. That sounded easy enough, right? What was the first one?

You realized that there was one thing you had to do before going through with any of this. "Grisha's letter," You said out loud to yourself, knowing that you had to know what exactly he intended for you to do with this announcement of the inheritance, what was his goal, what he was thinking when he chose you to be the inheritor. You had it in your purse, didn't you? And you left your purse in your room when you went to change. Okay, that's easy.

You can do that, you can handle it. But just as you started heading over to your room, your phone buzzed in your pocket. You halted in your steps and you fished your phone out of your sweatpants.

You looked at your lock screen and saw that it was a notification from Hange that said; 'You have to see this'. What was this about? It sounded serious.

Your eyebrows furrowed with confusion as you unlocked your phone, went into your chat with Hange and then clicked on the link they'd sent you just now.

It was a news article, from a gossip column it looks like. And when the article loaded, you gasped, your hand flew to your mouth and your eyes went wide at what you were seeing. No, no, no. You panicked.

"Eldia Group Heir turned down at the speed of light; Read more below," You dropped your hand from your mouth and your mouth was agape as you scrolled down further. You should've expected this would happen.

The headline picture was a still photo of you proposing to Levi, but that wasn't the worst part. Only his face was blurred out. Yours was there, clear and visible. "What is this?" you muttered to yourself in horror. A reporter or photographer must have taken it. One of the many that were there that afternoon.

You continued to scroll back and forth on the article, zooming in the picture, and just anything that could help you comprehend what you were looking at exactly. But that's when you realized that you couldn't go to bed just yet.

How many articles about you are there going to be from now on? First, Karina's, and now this? You needed to talk to Levi about this and it had to be now. Has he even seen it?

Just how recent is this article? You left the article and went straight to your contacts app, searching for Levi's. The sooner you could meet up with him to tell him about this, the better. This couldn't wait.

-

Hello everyone! I'm sorry I missed an update last week, but I promise that we're back to our regularly scheduled programming! Updates every Sunday! I went back to uni last week and I was just kind of getting used to my new schedule, but now that I am, ill continued updating weekly like before!

I was a little iffy about this chapter, I don't know why but I just decided to trust my gut and come back to it if I need to change anything. Either way, I hope you guys liked it! I know there wasn't a whole lot of Levi in this one, but I promise there will be in the next chapter! What do you guys think of Erwin and y/n's friendship so far? Any thoughts?

Anyway, the next couple of chapters are going to be really fun to write so I hope you guys are excited about it too :,) Feel free to leave your thoughts, theories, feedback, etc! I love reading your guys' comments and I always take them into consideration!

But, anyway, I'll see you guys on Sunday! I love you all so,  a so much, and thank you again for reading! See you in the next one! :,) XO