ALL BY MYSELF
5x10

Rowan was just minding her own business, she really was. She'd noticed the brunette being more distant, but she just thought it was her accepting the fact she wasn't going to let her propose, so she didn't pressure the girl.

Oh, she was most definitely wrong.

Because here the intern was, down on her knee, proposing. The blonde attending's jaw dropped.

Not to mention they were in the middle of the freaking E.R.!

She'd missed half of what her 'girlfriend'— about to be 'fiancé'— had said to her. Everyone in the E.R had paused what the were doing, thank god there was no incoming trauma.

"..Rowan, I love you, and I know I'm way younger than you, and I know we wanted to keep it a secret, and.."

Rowan put on a big, fake smile. This was really happening, holy shit.

"Alexandra Caroline Grey!" Rowan put her hand over her mouth, trying to scold her but also making it look real.

"I know you don't really talk to your parents, but I still wanted to get someone— or I guess— I got four peoples approval," Lexie recounted in her head. "Yep. Four."

"What?" Rowan smiled to herself—a real smile this time.

"Yeah, um, Derek, Meredith, Mark and.. Addison?"

"You— asked Dr. Montgomery?" Rowan laughed, looking down at the intern.

"Y— yes? Should I not have?" Lexie looked at Rowan innocently, which made Rowan actually want to say yes.

"No, of course it's okay— I'm just.."

"Surprised?" Lexie answered for her.

"Yes, very," Rowan placed her hand on the nurses station counter. "I—"

"Oh, for the love of god, say yes already," Bailey shook her head. "Breaking that poor girls knees."

"Yes, of course, Alexandra. I'll marry you," Rowan chuckled as Lexie slipped the engagement ring on— yes, she actually got an engagement ring—but stopped when she realized what was going to come next. Surely the brunette wouldn't kiss her in front of every—

And then the interns soft lips were on hers, they were really soft, and tasted like the Burt's Bees mint cocoa chapstick she knew Lexie frequently bought and overly applied, if you asked Rowan.

She liked it. It tasted like mint chocolate chip ice cream—her favorite.

The married couple to be, heard clapping from around them.

Rowans hands come up to cup Lexie's cheeks, pulling her into a long kiss—just for show, Rowan assured herself.

She heard Mark whistle as the two pulled away. The woman looked into Lexie's eyes, but she didn't feel anything. No sparks or fireworks.

Lexies pager starts beeping and she has to pull away to look down, "It's Dr. Yang, I have to go," She kisses Rowans cheek as she passes to leave the E.R.

Mark walks towards his best friend, slowly clapping, a wide smirk playing on his lips.

"You actually gave in?" Mark takes a chart out from under his arm and put it on the counter. "I owe Derek twenty bucks."

"I didn't give in," Rowan huffed an angry sigh. "She just did it on her own. She really wanted to help. I— I can't believe she did it. I mean.. wait, you guys bet?"

"I just heard," Derek smiled. "I get to walk you down the aisle!"

"Hey, who said?" Mark shut his chart.

"Ro did," Derek held his hand out so he could get his money from Mark.

"You are such a liar," Rowan squinted. "Neither of you will be walking me down the aisle because it's gonna be a paper wedding. No big celebration."

"Why not?" Derek frowned as Mark rolled his eyes and put the money in his hand.

"Just because.." Rowan shook her head. "I didn't even want to do this in the first place."

Derek nods taking the money from Mark.

"It was you. Wasn't it? You pushed her to do it. I knew you told her— but this, Shepherd!" Rowan threw her arms up.

"Woah, Ro," Derek put his hand up. "I didn't tell her to propose to you. I only told her you were going to be deported and needed a saving grace."

"Fuck off," Rowan rolled her eyes. "I have to go find an intern for the day."

"I hope it's Dr. Grey," Mark laughs at the thought. "I am walking you down the aisle. Got it, Shep?"

"You both are immature," Rowan backed up a few feet, her pager going off now. "I guess I'm gonna have to start the day off on my own."

💍

"I'm not sorry," Sadie told Lexie.

"What?" Lexie looked away from the surgery happening at the moment.

"For what we did," Sadie clarified. "It was extreme, maybe even stupid, but this program? I mean, you should be down in that O.R. Not up here in the nosebleeds, and I shouldn't be spending my entire day transcribing all of Karev's charts because his handwritings illegible. I mean, how is that teaching?" Sadie sighed.

Rowan felt like she shouldn't be listening in on her fake fiancés conversation's, but in her opinion, it was better than the surgery going right now. And, upsettingly, she ran out of crossword puzzles in her book and wouldn't be able to get to the store in a few days.

"So they can call me Crazy Sadie and god knows what other names, but that doesn't change the fact that this program is broken. I mean, the only time they ever bother with us is if they think they can get us in bed," Sadie finished her quiet rant.

"That's not true," Lexie shook her head, looking at the blonde intern beside her. "Dr. Potter takes the time to teach her interns. She genuinely likes them."

Rowan smiled a little, biting on her nail to hide it, she did like interns—some of them, that is.

"Some of them," Lexie thought aloud. "When she teaches it doesn't matter whether she likes or dislikes them."

"But that's different, she likes you."

"I hope so," Lexie let out a laugh.

"Don't think no one's noticed the way she eyes your ass. I thought something was going on there," Sadie whispered.

"You are delusional," Lexie shook her head. "We may be engaged now, but we're both very professional at work."

Sadie raises her eyebrows and her eyes make their way to the glass to pay attention to Dr. Sloans surgery, "Is he cutting into her throat? Bloody hell."

Lexie smiles to herself, had she really been looking at her ass? Maybe it was just for show. But, deep down Lexie wanted it to be real.

"Dr. Potter?" A nurse comes in the room, Lexie turned around to look at the blonde obgyn who was paying attention to the nurse.

"Yeah?" Rowan has her hands on the chair arms in case she has to get up in a hurry.

"Someone by the name of, uh, Natalia Potter, is here to see you."

Rowan's face changed from happy to an undecidable expression—a mixture of sad, happy and anger all at once.

"You're kid—" Rowan launched up from the chair, making her way out of the room.

She speed walks towards the nurses station where she finds her sister standing there, asking another nurse to find me, "Hi, I need to see Rowan Potter."

"Need me?" Rowan scoffed, placing her hands on her hips.

"You did it," Natalia looked at her sister which surprised. "You really did it."

Here her sister was, her absolutely innocent little baby sister, who'd always looked too much like their father for her taste.

"Yeah, I did," Rowan clenched her jaw. "You take your report right back to Mr. and Mrs. Potter."

The oldest sister turned to leave but Natalia stepped forward, "Rowan, wait."

Rowan looked back and into Natalia's eyes—the only part of her she could see in herself.

Her perfect baby sister.. and here she was in Seattle.

Rowan took two steps forward and grabbed her sisters hand, dragging her to an empty on-call room, or what she thought would be one.

There Derek was on the main bed in the room.

"Ro, shut the door," Derek groaned. "Oh you have company."

"Shepherd get out, now."

"How about a please?"

"I'll shove the goddamn please up your bloody ass if you don't get the hell out right now," Rowan pointed to the door, and Derek left quickly—he'd never seen her swear like that and was scared to hear it.

"Potter, what are you doing here?" Rowan turns the light on, so she could see her sisters face.

"You know, Mum, Dad, lawyer business," Natalia shrugs. "Nice place you got here. Last time I was around, you were only a fellow for Addison. How is she, by the way?"

"Hm," Rowan hums. "Here I thought you were here to bond. That is, until you find a new boy."

"You have any recommendations? The guy who was just in here was hot, put in a good word?" Natalia hit where she knew would hurt Rowan.

"You— oh, you really are a Potter."

"In the flesh," Natalia lifted her arms.

"I'm not doing this, Potter. I have patients," Rowan turns to leave the room, but Natalia spoke up.

"You can't call your own baby sister by her first name?" Natalia tilted her head cockily.

"Not when said sister betrayed me," Rowan draws back from the door handle, crossing her arms.

"Look, it was years ago. They deserved to know," Lia said.

Rowan scoffed, "Which part? The part where you told them I was gay? Or the part where you told them I wasn't joining the family business like you so clearly did? I thought we had a pact—"

"We were five, Rowan. We didn't know what we saying!"

"Oh, yeah?" Rowan nodded. "You say that now? After seeing what our father does? The bad men he helped? Come on, Potter! I thought you of all people would understand why I didn't want to go down that path."

"You think I don't know that?" Natalia shot right back.

"No. I know you know," Rowan shook her head turning around, but looks back at Natalia as she spoke. "I never told them any of your secrets. The boyfriends, the FBI Academy letter I know you got back."

Natalia's eyelashes flutter, that was always her tell, Rowan knew she hit deep.

"How'd you know about that," Natalia kept her head held high.

"Let's just say, I could've been a good lawyer."

"You—"

The Potter sisters heads snap towards the door as Lexie Grey peeks in.

"Hi," Lexie steps into the room. "Is this—"

"Natalia," The girl stuck her hand out. "Natalia Potter."

yeah that happened

i'm gonna try to update
roses later this week.
maybe on friday or
saturday