Joseph

Tuesday, December 8, 2002

Morning

He was shaving his face, glancing at me every few seconds. "Can we talk about the other night?"

"Sure, what's up?" I answered, fixing my tie in the mirror.

He moved in front of me, blocking the mirror. "You're going out with some random guy and I just got jealous." What would he need to worry about? He acts as If I cheated before.

"He's a friend Sebastian, and he has a girlfriend"

"A friend?" he scoffed, with a small laugh. "That's what they all say..."

That's what he said when he cheated... "Just go, Sebastian..."

"What did I say?" He croaked, wrapping his hand around my waist. This is what he does when I'm upset... Can't move till we're alright.

"Sebastian, I have work..."

He strengthened his grip. "Joseph, tell me." him trying to be serious and intimidating was always funny to me. He's neither.

"It just brought up some memories, okay?" He let go, rubbing his head. "I have to go. I'm already late for work," I added, grabbing my suitcase. Usually, I would ride with him, but I took my own car. No need to make myself annoyed intentionally.

...

The warm air felt spectacular as I stepped into the building. "Joseph!" Sarah squealed from her desk. The memories of dancing and drinking made a grin creep onto my face like it never had. This was new, and I only wanted more of it.

"Hey Sarah, How's your morning?"

"It's good. When are we going back out?" she asked with a quickness I was not used to...

"Uh- When do you wanna go out?"

"Tonight!" She squealed. "Oh, also you have a new patient," She added with a pretty smile.

"It's a date!" I joked, pressing the elevator. "Before I go up, what's their name?"

"Felix!" she chirped, going back to her phone.

The kiss from last night floated back into my head as the elevator went up. His lips were so gentle but aggressive at the same time... He seemed freaked out, probably should check on him.

╭━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━╮

Alex

"Sorry about running out," He typed.

Well, never mind then...

"I meant to check up on you. How are you?"

╰━━━━━━━━━━╯

Ding! the elevator signaled, causing me to step out. I stared at my phone, waiting for a response before walking into someone, dropping my suitcase. Paper's spilled out all over the hallway and I bent down picking them, only to touch a tatted hand.

"I'm sorry..." I mumbled, looking up at Alex's smile.

"I'm better now, to answer your question," he chuckled as he stacked a few of them. He was dressed in black jeans with a belt and some band t-shirt that showed off his tattoos and muscles.

"Sorry I'm late, extremely unprofessional of me..."

As I closed the suitcase, he placed the remaining papers inside. "No biggie, the wait is worth it," he murmured, with a sly grin on his face. I couldn't do anything except smile and open the door for him.

He sat in the chair as I fumbled in my suitcase. God, where are the notes? "Sorry, just a second," I muttered as I rummaged through the stack of papers. "I- uh... can't find my notes, but I remember where we were at!" I nervously laughed, sitting in the chair across from him.

"Chill, I'm not gonna tell on you," He joked, playing with the ring on his finger.

Clearing my throat, I took my trusty notepad and pen from the desk. The aura in the room was oddly positive and awkward. "So, how was your morning?"

He chuckled again, biting his lip. "We talked about this already..." I did ask that... I'm so stupid.

"Right, right I'm sorry..."

He smiled, staring at me. "You nervous doc?"

Nervousness shows weakness. I straightened my posture and fixed my face into a serious expression. "You said you needed a friend?"

His face changed with that question, it was like he was waiting on something... "Yeah, I do" My fingers went to work but from the corner of my eye I could see a glimmer of sadness in his eyes but as quickly as I noticed, it was gone.

"You're fairly attractive and seem nice. What do you think the problem is?"

His mouth formed a toothy smile. "You're not bad yourself..." He swooned, his eyes darting all over me. "But... I think people are just dickheads..."

As I fought to hold back my laughter, a slight grin developed on my face. "Why is that?"

"I had a boyfriend, and he cheated on me. " My chest got tight hearing that word. All the memories started flooding in. "You okay?" He asked as a tear ran down my face.

My brain was telling me to put on a strong face, but my heart wouldn't let me. "Fine, keep going," I sniffled as I got up, looking out the window. The cars and overall city as a whole always made me feel better.

"Did I say something?" He asked from behind me.

As I turned back, his breath smelt of mint, and his crystal blue eyes were filled with worry. "No, it wasn't you," I stuttered, my gaze falling on the two roses on his collarbones and the several other tattoos that ran down his chest and arms. My mind wandered back into his eyes. They were so... "beautiful..." I gushed, realizing I said it out loud. "I didn't mean to say that!" I stammered out, walking past him.

He just chuckled, staring at my obviously flustered face. "I think you're pretty beautiful too Joseph and our kiss last night was..." He trailed walking up to me. It's like at one point he's gentle and sensitive, then the next he's playful and dominant... "Amazing..." He cooed, his finger brushing across my upper lip.

My cheeks were flushed, and butterflies invaded my stomach. "Well, that's all the time we have for today," I blurted out, moving past him.

He knew what he was doing. That smug smile said it all... "Just know you really do make me happy" He smirked, brushing his hand against mine, walking out of the room. What am I doing...

...

By the time I got home, the outside was nothing but streetlights and the faint barking of a dog in the neighborhood. Even through the calming silence of the night, that moment in my office kept running through my mind. He's a patient, Joseph. We have to be smarter than that...

"Baby!" Sebastian shouted, catching my attention. "You haven't even touched your food..."

It was some soup with vegetables in it. Not the tastiest thing, but he's all about this whole vegan thing. Never was that appetizing to me, but you sacrifice sometimes...

"Sorry, I'm just not hungry right now..." I muttered, thinking about his tattoos.

He studied my face, taking a sip of water. "What are you thinking about right now?"

"Work."

He stood up with a smile and grabbed my hand. "I have a surprise for you!"

My thoughts immediately went back to the party. "Please don't tell me you have a hundred people stuffed in our house again..."

He just grinned, guiding me up the stairs to our room. There was a red box on the bed. "Open it" It was a bigger box. My heart skipped beats as the thoughts in my head spiraled, but those thoughts crumbled as I opened it. It was another Rolex... just like his other gifts...

"I thought-"

"You like it?" He beamed.

I thought he was going to propose... "Yeah, it's nice..." I sighed with a smile.

He scanned my face, taking the box from me. "What's wrong? Did I get the wrong one?"

"No, it's amazing! I just thought it was something else..." as the memories struck me one by one, my emotions arose. "I don't know why I expected that..." I giggled, trying not to cry.

"Joseph, I know you want that, but I'm not ready..."

He'll never be ready... "Right. Right," I mumbled as my eyes heated. "Thanks anyway, it's lovely."

"I don't know how to make you happy, Joseph." he took the watch out of my hand, setting it in the box. "Tell me how and I'll do it."

"I want marriage, a family..."

"Joseph, we're only in our twenties. I still wanna live my life and party." He wiped the tear from my face. "I know you want what your parents have, but I don't, at least not right now."

"We've been together for six years, Sebastian, and in between those years you cheated!" Tears started falling down my face and with every tear, anger piled with it. "When will you be ready?"

"Joseph, wouldn't that tell you? Maybe I'm not the right guy for that?" His eyes grew as he realized what he said. "That didn't come out right..."

"No, that's how you feel..." I wiped away my tears, taking a deep breath. "I want space Sebastian, Just leave me alone"

He opened his mouth to say something but decided on leaving. He closed the door, and I was alone... I'd spent six years with him. Helping him with all his problems and for what? Nothing at all. Something in the room buzzed. It was muffled and I couldn't pinpoint it till I grabbed my phone.

It was Alex calling... Shit, I still have that clubbing thing with Sarah...

━ ★ ━

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Sincerely, R.J