xyst (noun) - a garden walk lined with trees

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥  do or die by axel johansson

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD,
CORDELIA COULD NOT BELIEVE CUE

Cordelia feels her scowl deepen from where she's seated in Cue's house, eyes trained on the open window not far in front of her to watch Cue's careful, calibrated movements.

He thinks he's being so convincing. Well, he isn't. Cordelia can spot a liar a mile away, and right now all she sees is neon lights painted on his face. Maybe it is because they're dating, or because they're soulmates or whatever, but Cordelia is more than confident that she's just good at picking apart people when they lie to her, and she hates being lied to.

Of course, she very much doubts that Cue is intentionally lying about it, but he's also a prideful asshole who doesn't know when to admit that he might need a goddamn break. Despite the boiling irritation, Cordelia also knows that Cue really won't let her see until he's sure about one thing or the other.

Honestly, kind of a bummer, especially cause he's so fucking hot.

Grumbling, Cordelia shrinks in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest before looking back up at the ceiling for a brief moment. Maybe she could somehow convince him to just get Asia to look at it- even if she had to make Asia promise not to do anything even remotely teasing towards him.

The problem was Cue was an easy target. He clearly didn't mind being teased about really anything, which is exactly why he was the target of almost anyone, but Cordelia thinks this one thing might be the actual line he has. She's having a hard enough time as it is to get Cue to admit he's injured to her, so if any of the one immortals makes a goddamn comment about his back problems by reducing it to his age, she might snap.

It's a weird feeling, and she knows it's almost dramatic, but she also knows that the moment someone teases him like that about his injuries, he's just going to hide them all over again.

Cordelia's pretty sure that's the real reason Cue hasn't asked Asia, anyway.

They'd already had a very long conversation before they started dating about it. Cue had been adorably insecure about it, like he was doing something very, very wrong. Cordelia of course insisted that Echo and Joon were dating, first of all. Not to mention, Cordelia was his soulmate, so their souls were the same age, and that's what mattered right?

It was a weird conversation to have admittedly, but Cordelia had decided that no one else cared, and she wanted to be with him, so why the fuck did it matter?

She knows it still bothers Cue a little bit if he thinks about it too much.

Shaking the thoughts from her head, she again pushes up in the chair, eyes trailing across the window just in time to see the wonderful, wonderful, sight of Cue pulling his shirt off over his head.

He was just oh-so-handsome, reaching up to run a hand through sweat-logged hair as he eyed his project. Admittedly, he was very capable when it came to handling the wood-carving tools, and she didn't really mind at all. Although Cordelia is pretty sure that he's forgotten she's even here, probably lost in thought.

That is one of the things she realized, that Cue actually thinks a lot. Not that she thought he didn't, but he always seemed so stoic and sure about every decision he'd ever made, but in all reality he's constantly refitting the scenario, questioning if he made the right call at all. It doesn't really matter.

It's surprisingly sweet, and the only reason she has even a hint towards his inner thoughts is because he talks in his sleep, grumbling or muttering, or just speaking in soft, almost incoherent sounds. Originally, she thought it would be annoying, but it's quiet enough that it's more of a comfort than anything else. Not to mention, Cue's voice is deep enough for it to rumble up his chest, and she absolutely adores that.

Cordelia hid her smile underneath her hand, eyes tracing his muscular form before orienting her thoughts back to at least one of the more appropriate reasons why she wanted him to take off his shirt.

Turn around.

Much to her delight, he did exactly that after folding up his shirt and setting it aside on the bench. For a moment, she admired his back muscles.

At least, before she felt all enthusiasm drain from her face.

Oh god.

The scars on Cue's back were a deep, angry red, streaks of black and maroon liquid streaming down his back, tracing the vertebrae of his spine. The spider-webbed scars were painted with the prologue of some kind of deep bruise, as if infection itself was beginning to eat away at him. Blooming flowers of purple and pink spotted his skin in the spots where the scars seemed most prominent, thick ridges of tissue standing along the joints of where his wings would appear regularly. Venomous spindles of crimson speckling up the spontaneous scratches.

Cue.

Anxiety floods her as she watches Cue turn to roll his shoulders, sighing softly. It looks like it hurts, which means it hurts Cordelia. She can't really move for a moment, tracking his movement for any sort of physical sign that it does hurt, that he can feel what it must be doing for him.

The fact that his face doesn't shift much at all terrifies her.

Buried anxiety gives way to fury as she pushes to her feet, half-glaring at him through the window before promptly pulling away to hook her hand around the door frame and poking her head out. She's scowling now, and anger pins her tone to the ground, "Cue Hathor."

Cue at last snaps his head towards her, realization suddenly flickering in his eyes before standing up a little straighter, eyes tracking her as she storms toward him. He really doesn't say much of anything, but that's not unexpected.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!"

"Cordelia-"

"You better have one hell of an explanation for me."

Cue sighs then, crossing his own arms over his broad chest, looking right back at her with infuriating persistence. "It looks worse than it is."

"That's a load of bullshit." Venom outpours in every word, but honestly, she couldn't really be bothered about it. It's enough of an annoyance that Cue outright lied to her about how bad his back actually was, it's a whole other thing to realize he's hiding that he's severely injured from everyone.

Her boyfriend's response is another one of those heavy sounding sighs, running a hand through his hair again. "Okay, Cordy. Yes, I'm hurt. No, it's not the worst I've ever seen."

"That has nothing to do with what I'm talking about!"

"Oh? It doesn't? Then how come you get to use that excuse every time you don't sleep, or eat, or take care of yourself."

The response is sharp, albeit true, and nothing infuriates her more than being called out on something she knows is entirely hypocritical. Because she knows that he's right, but more than anything she doesn't want him to be. "That is not fair."

"So how come it only matters when it's me then, Cordelia?"

"Because I am trying, Cue!" Her voice is loud, and it echoes into the thicket around them, glinting off of the half-finished project that Cue has scattered about. It's loud enough that Cue's mouth snaps shut, and he almost, almost, takes a step back from her. Soft anxiety outlines the outburst of fury when she adds, "And you aren't trying at all. Do you understand how frustrating that is for me?"

"Cordy-"

"No! No, you don't get to reason with me about this because you're being so, so unreasonable, it's like you can't even see what you are doing to yourself!" It feels selfish almost, to say this, but the words are flowing faster than her mind can catch up to them. "I finally found someone, the one person who loves me for who I am, and you want me to just let you have the opportunity to take it away from me?" Her hand throws out towards the other houses down the trail, winding up the path of the forest from where they are looking out on the cliffside of Cue's private beach, "You want to take it away from them?"

He's fallen silent now, staring at her quietly before he follows her hand, looking in that same direction. Cue does look a little hurt now, but not in the way that Cordelia wanted him to admit. Guilt pools in the pit of her stomach, but as much as she knows it might be painful to hear, she also knows that he needs to hear it. Who else is going to tell him?

"They already lost their old families, Cue."

She swallows hard, feeling the gaze of her lover snap right back to hers.

"Don't make them lose this one too."

He's silent now, staring at her with those enchanting, dark eyes, but his arms drop from his chest, to his side in an admission of defeat. "Okay." It's quieter than what his voice was at a moment ago, but he walks towards her anyway, and she feels a cool hand cup the side of her face before he plants a kiss on her forehead, "Okay, sweetheart, I'll tell them."

The chill seems to soothe her temperament momentarily, but the lingering irritation rides her chest, and instead she presses her own arms over her chest, "Good." Cue's other hand cups the other side of her face, tilting it up towards him, and a light-hearted smile crosses his features. He really doesn't smile that often, and he's got a nice one. Cordelia sighs again, huffing back up at him in childish petulance. "I'm still mad at you."

He's about to answer when a different voice, mockingly high-pitched calls out to them both. "Cueeeee! Where are you?" After a moment, Cassian appears, a sleazy grin dipping over his features, "Oh sorry, you guys, I didn't mean to interrupt whatever you're doing." He raises his eyebrow, almost expectantly, and Cordelia feels Cue retract his hands, shaking his head slightly as his smile vanishes from sight.

"What do you need, Cassian?"

"We're supposed to have my first flying lesson today!" It's clear he's trying to hide his enthusiasm, but Cassian's eyes are bright as he leans against the tree, "Of course, I could wait till you're done with whatever it is that you were doing-"

"Cassian." Cordelia snaps right back at him, frustrated mainly because of the serious discussion she'd been having only a moment ago. Still, it's not really his fault since he clearly couldn't read the room, but that didn't mean it wasn't infuriating all the same.

For a moment, Cue looks back at her, silently debating. That is, until Cassian added in a stupid-fucking sing-songy voice, "That is, unless you're too exhausted, you know, I heard it comes with old age."

Shut up.

Cordelia's eyes flare, the fury frothing back up to the tip of her throat when she watches Cue slowly nod, "..i'll be there in a minute Cassian."

What.

She blinks hard, waiting for that tsunami of anger to overtake her, but it doesn't. It's something else entirely that sits heavy in the bit of her stomach when she raises her eyes to meet Cue's, and he won't catch her gaze at all. Instead, Cue reaches for her arm, still silent, and Cordelia understands the silent apology. Then he side-steps her entirely, trodding after Cassian down the path from where he gleefully waited.

"The other's area is already waiting, since my wings are so cool and all." Cassian's grin is smug, and Cordelia really wishes that he would just understand what was happening. Instead, Cue's wings appear, and she watches flesh tear from flesh, old scars ripping against each other as twin wings manifest in the air, vanishing down the trail in only a moment. The wounds seem obscured with his wings out.

Maybe that's why no one else noticed.

Cordelia trails after them in thoughtful silence, the weighing burden of the sight slowing each and every step, while making it seem like the world was moving faster than it should have been. She recognizes the feeling. It's the vague realization that she's beginning to dissociate. What scares her more is the fact that she doesn't really mind.

She reaches the cliffside only moments later is what it feels like. Cassian's wings are already out, broad and dark, stretching in the sunlight. They're clean-cut, like they've been born anew, especially compared to Cue's. The others are patiently encircling the edge, watching with their own blooming enthusiasm that Cordelia won't even pretend to have.

How could she, when she's watching the love of her life act like the prideful asshole she knows he is?

"I'll fly out first Cassian, then all you have to do is just fly towards me." Cue's voice is patient, but there's something underlying it, something almost strained.

Cassian nods fervently, "Right."

"You already know the movements, so all you have to do is just focus."

Cassian nods again, "Right."

Cue himself nods then, turning and taking off the cliffside, wings beating the air as he begins to slowly travel down the horizon. He isn't going too far, which is something Cordelia can hold onto as a lifeline. Her eyes are trained on him entirely, but she feels Asia lean over to her.

"Sorry if Cassian did interrupt something, Delia. He's pretty oblivious at times." Distantly, Cordelia realizes that Cassian sneers right back at her, and Asia shakes her head.

"No, it's fine." Her response is muffled at best, eyebrows furrowing as she realizes Cue isn't moving fast at all, his wings moving almost unpredictably.

Asia sighed again, covering her mouth, "Cue's age must be catching up to him."

Shut up.

Beside her, Cassian laughs softly, "Well, even with his back problems, you gotta give it to him, he doesn't know when to quit."

Shut up.

Joon laughed too, although it was tense, his attention obviously focused on Echo, who's eyes were wide, tracking the movements of Cue just as much as Cordelia was. "Maybe it's like the thing people say about grandparents."

"That they don't know when they're too old to quit?" Echo muses, but it sounds like she's answering a question, and Joon frowns a little at her, tilting his head.

Shut up.

She's watching Cue intensely now, Cordelia's eyes ablaze with an intricate mix of concern and absolute outrage. He's not moving at all now, but he isn't turning around at all to wave Cassian over. No. He looks like he's pressing his hands to his chest, his back still facing them, and slowly descending.

"Maybe he's just tired." Amir pokes, and Cassian laughs again, light-hearted and easy-going. Much too bright to even match the comprehension of the situation.

Shut up.

"At his age? Who wouldn't be- I should have been the bigger person and canceled, he might not even be in his right mind."

"Shut up, Cassian!" Cordelia's words finally unveil themselves, hollowing out the atmosphere around them as she whips to face him. He's shut his mouth now, and Cordelia feels the re-igntion of every fucking insult, "Just shut up! He's hurt, okay??"

Frantically, Cordelia turns back to the ocean, only to see her worst fear envisioned. 

It's Cue, plummeting towards the clashing waves of the ocean.

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

wyn !!

twenty-fourth chapter done !

...sorry ?