6 - still broken
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2 0 2 1
"I WISH I COULD say we were watching over you." alex said darkly.
"looks like it's your turn to talk." you sighed, thankful for the emotional break you would get. you laid down, resting your head on lukes legs. he stroked your head, and sighed himself.
"i wish there was much to tell. it was really just blackness."
"never ending, eternal, inevitable-" reggie kept going with the synonyms.
"we get it." you glared at him, realizing julie had said the same thing. you girls giggled, and alex spoke up.
"it was just nothing. but it was so overwhelming." the boy looked like every pore of his skin was stressed, so you reached over to squeeze his hand.
1 9 9 5
( kind of )lukes pov
my eyes opened. but, at the same time, i couldn't really tell if they did. the black shade of the back of my eyelids matched the scene in front of me, the only thing telling me i was awake was the soft touch of my eyelashes on my skin. i blinked multiple times roughly, just to check.
oddly, i still tasted those hotdogs. with the mustard that was more spicy then sweet. and the weird sour taste of the meat that had rubbed me the wrong way. just for a moment, and then it was gone.
i groaned. and it sparked another next to me.
"alex?"
silence.
a breath.
"about time the punk woke up." reggie.
"what the heck?" i sat up, though, it felt like i didn't even have a body to move, "what is going on?"
"you've been out for hours," alex spoke from the void around me, "or days. who even knows." i heard him sigh roughly, "i think we're dead."
the news hit me like a brick. i lost my breath, dead? this must be some joke.
"what? how?" i almost laughed, but the pressing eeriness of the blackness around me forced me to stay serious. "i don't remember anything happening."
"it was those hotdogs man." reggie said, "remember that awful stomach ache we all got."
"i told you it was just nerves." the last few moments, of my life apparently, came back to me, and i felt the phantom pains of that stomach ache. ripping, spoiling pain of the food digesting. we all knew something was up, but didn't want to admit it. getting sick wasnt an option; we were playing the orpheum.
"well, looks like you were wrong." he said bluntly.
"we never got to play." i said lowly, and, if i could actually feel emotional pain wherever i was, i felt it now. stronger then ever. we were so ready to play that night, and, if we were dead, everything we did was all for nothing.
"that's what your thinking of right now?" alex said the words in a tone that instantly made me guilty, "what about our families? bobbie?..." he went on a full on list of things that were more important than our band. and he was right about all of them.
and her.
( alex had said her name early in the list, due to obvious reasons of the teens relationship status, but luke had been too deep in thought to notice )
i began to panic. where was she? did i just leave her behind? where was i? and how could i get to her, as fast as possible, i needed to find the way to her. to reach her. right now.
1 9 9 5
( irl )your pov
"i'm sorry i can't stay." i looked down at my converse, "i can't believe i'm missing this night." you had just watched them perform a practice run of now or never, watched bobbie flirt with a worker, and now had to say goodbye due to your parents strict curfew.
"hey," luke whispered, shaking your hands that were already in his, "this isn't going to be the only night. this is just the beginning. after this," he let one hand go to make a dramatic gesture in the air above your heads, "the sky is our limit." you both giggled, and he pressed his forehead into yours. something you both always did after big shows, just a little early this time.
"to playing our hearts out."
"-and singing like there's no tomorrow."
"and doing it all together." he finished, leaning in to hug you.
oddly, you realized this hug was comfier than your usual hugs, and you pressed your face into his neck while he wrapped his arms around you even tighter. he smelt like his usual scent, sweet but subtle vanilla, and his soft hair tickled your forehead. you smiled into his skin, and somehow you could tell he was smiling too.
"i love you." he whispered sweetly.
"i love only you." you mumbled.
you stood there for a while, just appreciating each other's company. until reggie taped him on the shoulder.
"dogs?"
you departed, but still held each other's hands, "drive safely home?" he smiled down at you.
"of course." you smirked up at him, "have the time of your lives babes."
1 9 9 5
( kind of )lukes pov
i got up, again without the feeling of any muscles contracting or bones moving, and panicked.
"we gotta get out of here." i breathed heavy now, running around to what felt like nowhere and searched for what only felt like air.
"luke," alex groaned, "don't you think we've checked?" i never stopped running, but alexs voice stayed right next to me.
"we have to go-"
"luke."
"we have to try to get out of here-"
"LUKE."
"we can't just-" i breathed heavy, "i need to find her-"
"LUKE!" both of reggies and alexs voice startled me to stop running, to stop talking. to just stop.
"we don't know where we are, ok?" reggie pleaded, "and we're pretty confident we're dead. that's enough as it is. we don't need you losing your mind." luke breathed easier now, finally letting it all settle in.
he would never see you again.
"and i know it's scary. i know it hurts." reggie seemed to lean in close, "but i don't think we'll see them again."
even though he had just thought it, hearing it was something else. and he knew reggie had meant bobbie and her, but one hurt a deathly amount more than the other.
if there was a floor beneath him, he had crumbled down to it. his body gave out, his mind seemed to fail to think straight, and he lost all hope.
and, without even taking a breath, he just screamed. an earth shattering, ear splitting, scream.
and oddly, he heard a girls voice echo with his. the same sob, same tone, same cry for help that was known for never coming.
he blamed it on imagination, screaming one last time, and sobbed into the darkness.
2 0 2 1your pov
"this is so depressing." julie muttered, bringing her knees to her chest as most of the teens around her had tears on their face.
"we both screamed that night." you muttered.
"you were alive," luke grumbled, "and i was dead." he grabbed your hand without looking toward you, "but we both felt the same pain that night."
"it was like that for," alex struggled to speak, "it honestly felt like hours and days, like it felt so long but went by so fast."
"english, alex." julie groaned.
"no, it makes perfect sense." reggie mumbled, rubbing his eyes, "it felt like an eternity."
"i've never really thought too much about it," luke mumbled, "or told anyone really," that made you perk up, "but i think that time in the void broke me a little." his words made you send a hand up to squeeze his shoulder, and he leaned his head against yours, "like, i don't know, i went insane or something and i'm still healing."
"no, i understand that completely." alex nodded, wiping the remaining tears off of his face, "it's like that place took a piece of us, and everytime i got shocked, it was a bit of that doom was haunting us again." you felt luke nod.
"that's why those sparks felt so familiar." reggie whispered hauntingly.
"that must've been so much worse." you said, closing your eyes as another tear slid down your cheek. "i mean, the minute i became a ghost, i relived the exact moment of my death. i was standing in the road though, and the car came right at me, through me, and i watched the tree hit the car. watched my body hit the dash," you shivered, "i watched myself die." luke wrapped an arm around you.
"i'm sorry." luke said in your ear, "that sounds like hell."
"it's not fair to compare struggles." julie stopped us, "at least, that's what my therapist kept telling me when i went to see him." she paused, "i would fight that loosing my mum was harder for me then it was for carlos. he was younger and i was closer to her," she rolled her eyes, "it was silly and selfish. but it taught me never to compare lives, each person has their own experiences and hardships."
you all nodded, offering kind smiles toward the girl that was still broken as well.
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