𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭.
~𝐁𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐀𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐬~

   𝐋𝐢𝐚

My father says kindness is the hardest thing to pay back. it cannot be measured. He says he would rather make a deal with the devil, call out a favour he knows he would pay back in kind other than deal with kindness. In a way, my father is the devil.

This has nothing to do with the fact that Luc has been ignoring me for the last twenty-four hours. It's just that, I have been thinking a lot about my father, or rather myself since Dad shot Max's bodyguard.

I'm not shocked, it's the way it had to be. But what he did has me reflecting on who I am, who I came from and what's expected of me.

My father was Max's judge, jury and executioner. He gave him a scarred face, the death of his bodyguard in his consciousness as punishment. But it didn't end there, the press has been constantly on his back since Chris's body was discovered. This will never go away, it will trail after him wherever he goes for the rest of his life. Just as the scar is part of him now, so is Chris's death.

"That's it! I refuse to be ignored anymore." I shout, entering Luc's bedroom. He is lying on top of the bed, his eyes closed. He doesn't stir, he continues to lie there as if he hadn't heard me.

"Luca!" I call. My voice breaking a little. He lifts his head toward me, his green gaze unwavering on my face.

He is still angry so much so his face is inscrutable.

"Okay, I admit it, I made a mistake. But why are you so mad at me?"

"That you don't know why I'm mad is enough reason to tip me off." He responded, sitting up on the bed, and then running his finger through his hair. It was longer, a few wisps touching the back of his neck.

"Tell me, please. I don't understand why you're so mad at me and not Max."

"Oh, I am mad at him. My head hasn't stopped thinking of numerous ways to skin him alive." His voice is calm, but the intensity in his eyes has not waned.

"What about me?" I asked in the same calm voice, but mine trembled and my lips quivered.

"You met with him and drank from his glass. Your lips touched the same place he did."

"That is why you're mad at me?" I couldn't hide the shock in my tone, staring at him wide-eyed.

"How would you feel if the tables were turned? " a tiny grin stretched at the corner of my lips thinking no one would day drug Luc.

"I'm glad you find it funny!" he exclaimed, letting his body fall back on the bed.

"No. I was thinking no one would dare drug you." I mumbled going to sit on the bed beside his feet. This is the closest we have been to each other and I felt like closing my eyes and exhaling slowly at the delight of his body so near yet so far.

"How would you feel if I shared the same glass of whatever drink with Caterina? Or any another woman I worked with.

I felt my body stiffen imagining him seated cosy in a club with another woman beside him.

"It would devastate me," I mumbled, sliding a gaze at him. He takes my eyes captive, and I can't move them from his—the intensity in them makes me want to hide, but I don't.

"Do you have feelings for him?"

I shake my head. I don't blame him for asking, yet there is a part of my heart that stings from his question. He has asked me this before, my answer was the same then.

"Then, Why, Lia? Make me understand why you met with him."

I opened my mouth, then closed it again immediately without saying a word. I didn't know where to begin.

"I...I was sick for a week." I began. He nodded. My father had already said as much to my mother, so the whole household knew, "and I was kind of lonely cooped up in the house," I cleared my voice, moving a little into the bed so my legs swung, "and when you called to say you wouldn't be coming as planned, I was kind of devastated so when Max called to invite me for a drink, I jumped at the offer.

I stopped, waiting for him to ask me anything, or say a few words, anything, a few words, or even one word to gauge his anger. He didn't, but his eyes remained on my face.

"I should perhaps say Max had asked me out before that. I told him I had a boyfriend, he said he didn't care, I said I cared and he said something vile so I started messing with him."

"What did he say?" he asked, his eyes flaring with unmistakable fury.

"I'm sorry, Luca. I can't tell you that." I throw the slippers on the floor and climb into the foot of his bed with my legs beneath me.

"I didn't understand why you were so angry with me at the first, but now I do."

His focus on me is so intense to the point that it makes me uncomfortable to retain mine. A strand of hair has fallen to his forehead almost touching his left eye. I'm on the edge, dreading what he might say to me. Luca has never been angry at me as he has been in the last few hours. It scares me somehow to see those beautiful eyes look at me with uncertainty.

"I am many things, Luca. Some I will learn along the way, but there is one thing I'm sure of now, one thing that is constant, and that is my love for you. That will never change.

I love you. I have loved you since I could remember, and if Father Josè is right about a woman being from a man's rib, then I'm sure I come from one of yours." He closed his eyes for half a second, a tiny, almost nonexistent smile touched the corner of his mouth.

"I'm yours, Luc. Never doubt that. I will act with many men in the course of my career, maybe kiss as many, but my heart, my body, my soul will forever be yours. In this lifetime, and the next. "I add. We stay in silence for what seemed like a lifetime before I see his hand about to grab me, but I lift mine up to stop him. "I need to add something before we end this conversation."

"What?" he asks in a wary tone.

"I invited Max for Christmas."

His eyes go wide, and he drops his hand, but I notice he's more confused about it than angry.

"Why the hell would you invite him?"

"He is going through a lot after Dad killed his bodyguard. He called me."

"He called you?"

I start to twist my fingers together fighting the urge to break our eye contact. I swear Luc is the only person on earth who can make me squirm.

"He cried, Luc. Wailing on the phone. I didn't even realize he loved Chris at all."

"Maybe he is just feeling guilty," I shake my head,

"That's not enough to make a grown man, especially an imperious one like him cry like that."

"So how is Christmas with the men who killed his beloved bodyguard going to help him?"

"I invited him because Father José will be here. I don't think there is any other human being alive who can comfort him as much as he can."

When he didn't say anything, I start to slowly push myself to his side like a kitten cautiously trying to lie down on someone's lap.

"C'mon now, please forgive my oversight this one time." I plead, squeezing myself on his left side, my hand on his chest.

He lowers his head to me, and I can't help but drop a kiss on his chest. I feel him stiffen, his body goes completely still, lust glows in his green gaze. I know he felt that kiss even though it was small and it was on top of his shirt.

"Sometimes I can't believe how much I want you," he whispers. I smile, knowing it is exactly the same way I feel about him.

"Good. The feeling is mutual."

He grins. My entire body tingles at the thought of us together. His lips on my mine, his hands exploring my naked body, him inside of me. I was starving, and only he could feed me.

"I didn't like thinking you might even have the slightest feeling for Max, or any other man but me." his words makes me giddy, shaky, the look in his eyes almost made me melt.

"I never had feelings for him, anger perhaps. I sent him a live rat. I wanted to send him a finger, but I fell sick. "

He laughs, and it is the best sound I have heard in a while. I didn't know how much I wanted to hear it, to see him happy until he let it out.

"Why?" I giggle at the sound of the laugh in his question, shrieking when he grabs my body, bringing me on top of him.

Oh, the joy of being held in his arms equals nothing I've experienced so far. He makes I feel safe, loved, protected. The way my body feels on his is like great poetry—the firm steady muscles holding me in place.

"I think..." he mumbles, the whisper swirling some loose tendrils of my hair. "No, I know it's not exactly fair to be this jealous when I've dated my share of women," my heart skips several beats with anticipation of what he was about to say, "but Lia, I'm insanely possessive of you. In an unhealthy way to be honest. I miss you like crazy when we are apart, I want to undress you with my first glance of you, I want to stay awake talking to you, touching you, laughing with you. You're the first person I think about when I wake up, the last before I succumb to sleep. The thought of you with another man makes me blindly mad, and If you ever fall in love with anyone else, it would destroy me. You are my kryptonite."

I cling to him, my face directly into his heart, my hands curling around his shoulders breathing him in. Suddenly I can't stop remembering us when we were younger, ten running around the little forest that is our home, twelve watching the twinkle in his eyes when he laughed or smiled, the first time we kissed, the afternoon we made love.

"I will never fall in love with anyone else. Will you?"

I move away from on top of him, and he let me. I tug him close to me, and he comes easily. "No. I'm forever yours." I hover next to him, watching him beneath my eyelashes as if I'm being coy, but I'm overwhelmed by the immense feelings I have for him and those he has for me. He tells me this often.

I press my lips to his forehead, letting my lips touch him longer before lying comfortably on his chest.

I can hear the rhythm of his heartbeat, thudding in my ear. Comforting me, luring me to sleep. I didn't sleep well, I didn't sleep a wink to be accurate. Luc's anger stole my sleep and my peace of mind.

"You know you can't hurt Max, don't you?" I whisper, moving my head from his chest to stretch beside him, my head on his pillow he had to push me slowly onto my side and then take the other one for himself.

"I know. They told me." I pick up his hand, intertwining our fingers before bringing them to my lips.

"Good. I don't think he will ever be the same again." You already told me that.

"I did?"

"Not in those words, but yeah."

"Hmm, Luc."

"Yes," he answers, a whisper soo soft I barely heard it.

"Never doubt my love for you. Ever. There are times I will want to kill you, but you can always be secure in my love for you."

"Okay," he touches my lips with his, and I slip into a comfortable, dreamless, peaceful sleep.

**************

𝖨'𝗆 𝖻𝖺𝖼𝗄, 𝖻𝖺𝖻𝖾𝗌. 𝖨𝗍'𝗌 𝖺 𝗅𝗈𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖾 𝗂𝗇. 𝖬𝖺𝗑 𝗁𝖺𝗌 𝖻𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝗂𝗇𝗏𝗂𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗁𝗈𝗅𝗒 𝗀𝗋𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽𝗌.  

1)𝖧𝗈𝗐 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗉𝖺𝗍𝗋𝗂𝖺𝗋𝖼𝗁𝗌 𝗀𝗈𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌?  

2) 𝖣𝗈 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗄 𝖫𝗎𝖼 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗋𝖺𝗂𝗇 𝖿𝗋𝗈𝗆 𝖿𝗎𝖼𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗎𝗉 𝖬𝖺𝗑?