⚠️ W A R N I N G ⚠️

this series of three chapters will mention:-

!! sexual assault !!
!! child abuse !!
!! suicidal tendancies !!
!! ignorant parents !!
!! psychotherapy !!
!! panic attacks !!
!! post traumatic stress disorder (ptsd) !!
!! depression !!
!! anxeity !!
!! sexism !!

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"let's go aera,"  eunmi smiles at the daughter, fixing the collar of her coat and takes her hand, happy about something that aera couldn't understand. her eyes then travel to her father who's on his phone as usual, only putting it down when eunmi nags him about it.

very normal sight that makes aera sigh softly, confirming that it's nothing special happening in the family. stuffing her hands in the front pockets of her long beige coat to protect herself from the cold environment outside, she follows her parents quietly, forcing herself to stay calm and it's just a rare outing at an even weirder time of the day in chilly mid-january.

as they make it out of the house, just to front lane, a heat wave makes her body shiver slightly, pulling her beanie down and hair a little ahead to reassure herself that she's not showing much of her face. the sweaty palms then hide back in their safe place: inside the pockets, and as she steps in the backseat of the car without wasting a second, away from the eyes of the otherwise deserted snowy street.

heaving out a sigh, she glances at her mother who's fixing her hair again using the mirror, getting a hiss from jaehyun. though he never says anything and just keeps his focus on driving. passing the streets that felt little familiar and more strange to aera, she still managed to notice the change in route their car took, making her frown and snap her head forward.

"where are we going?"

"relax honey, just to your uncle's place. after that we'll go for the appointment," eunmi smiles as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

aera nods slowly, feeling her throat tightening with the dryness and a familiar lump burning inside, even preventing her from speaking. the parents keep chatting occasionally to which aera feels deaf, what rings in her ears instead is her own voice, her own desperate breathings.

time flies in a blink and they're already in front of that big, luxurious mansion where her father's brother lives with his family that includes his second wife,— the first died due to a heart condition— his almost married son, and his daughter from his second marriage, who is still just ten years old. what aera hates the most about this place is the tremendous amount of empty space it has and the thick walls.

"what's with that face aera? smile," eunmi sighs, patting her back and aera snaps back to reality, realising that she's been staring at the door blankly for a while now.

she pulls up a smile, tugging a strand of hair behind her ear and gulps, flinching as the door is opened by a maid, letting them in to be welcomed by the man of the house himself. jeon jaemin, jaehyun's elder brother. his lips stretch into a warm smile for the guests, quickly stepping forward to hug jaehyun, eunmi and then aera too. patting her back when he pulls away and leans closer to kiss her forehead like always.

"ah you guys it's been so long," he says, glancing at jaehyun and eunmi as he gestures his hand for them to have a seat, while leading aera to the couch himself, his hand rested on her back like it owned the place. "how are you? especially our riri, you've grown up huh? does seoul feel the same as america?"

"no," aera mumbles, shifting away from him as her eyes search for her mother, but she just smiles at her, completely ignoring her restless face.

it broke aera's heart at times, seeing her acting like everything is okay all the damn time without a break, which often made aera question her own sanity, asking herself if maybe she was just being too paranoid. but eunmi or even jaehyun never compromised with their smiles and the frank enthusiastic shimmers in their eyes whenever they had to come here, making it hard for aera too say anything against that happy look of ignorance.

but it did push her away from her parents with a feeling of disgust for them accumulating inside her every time they would give her that fake smile, dead eyes.

jaemin's wife and children joined in too, the parents having their own conversation while aera is sitting quietly with the ten-year-old girl, sana. she's as cute as a her name, and looking at her often made aera smile. moreover she looked like the only sane person in this place to aera.

"unnie let's go to my room. dad bought me a doll house. we'll play with that." sana grins, taking aera's hand in hers and stands up already pulling the elder girl with her, not waiting much for her response.

"i-"

"go with her aera," eunmi nods at her to obey, smiling at her again, which only makes the girl nod subtly and follow sana upstairs.

"i'll get them some snacks,"

aera stops on her feet, glancing back at the owner of the voice with horror written in her face, while the little girl nods vigorously, "yes! dad can we take the chocolates too?" sana asks, pleading him with her eyes and pouty lips, making the man chuckle, nodding his head.

"whatever my princess likes," he walks over to the girls, patting his daughter's head and places the other hand on aera's shoulder, "we should make sure your unnie's well fed here right?"

"yes!" sana giggles, looking at aera and holds her hand again, "let's go unnie,"

"no, i— wait, mom," aera gulps, turning to her mother who sighs deeply, "i-i'm not feeling well, let's go home,"

"oh really?" jaemin gasps lightly, sliding up his hand from her neck and cheek to her forehead, "poor thing, you should go and rest in the guest room. let mom and dad talk to your aunty. come i'll take you there,"

tears fill aera's eyes as she stares at her parents, shaking her head subtly and begging them virtually, which they probably decide to unnotice and smile. she feels dead that instant, not even trying to stop her uncle who grabs her hand, leading her upstairs and tells her daughter to wait in her room while he helps aera out.

"so you're not feeling well hm?" jaemin locks the door, turning aera around to have her face pressed on the wall and him standing behind her, "let me make you feel better baby,"

aera shuts her eyes close, her hands balled into fists on her sides as she feels his warm breath making her shiver along with each layer of clothing disappearing from her body. to her dismay nothing was new.

•••

aera pants deeply, hands shaking as she closes the door and slides down against the wall, all the tears coming back to life now and her body gaining attention. from every little hair to every breath leaving her mouth, she felt it all— the pain, the tremors, the fear, the disgust. she was used and she knew it.

"it's okay..." she breathes out to herself, rubbing her own hands and arms, forcing up a smile despite the tears streaming down her face, "it's fine... he's gone..." she wipes her tears, standing up with shaky legs and grabs her clothes, continuosly mumbling to herself that she's okay and jaemin won't come here again, not today at least.

splashing some cold water on her face, she looks at the mirror, trying her best to stop crying to and look as normal as the moment she stepped in this house. after fifteen minutes of self consolidation and washing herself properly, she gets dressed in her clothes, smiling at the mirror the way she's supposed to smile stepping out of this room.

"okay," she breathes deeply, heading out and sees sana standing near the door with a scared expression, "hey, do you need something?"

she shakes her head quickly, running back to her room and closes her door, making aera sigh at the wierd behavior for she never does that. nonetheless, walking to the living room, she finds her parents standing up from the couch, making her sigh in relief that they're finally leaving, which also reminds her that she has a doctor's appointment today.

"let's go, are you okay now?" jaehyun asks, patting his daughter's back and aera forces a smile to him.

"of course, she's fine," jaemin chuckles, "your daughter is a strong girl, jaehyun,"

jaehyun chuckles, nodding his head at that, shaking hands with his brother and his wife before taking their leave. aera sits inside the car, noticing jaemin's heavy gaze on her which she decides to ignore and turns to the other side.

"what kind of behaviour was that aera? what is wrong with you i don't get it," eunmi shakes her in disappointment, "you were fine in the morning then suddenly you needed to rest?"

"i didn't want to go with him," aera mumbles.

"stop with that, i told you there's nothing like that. he's a nice man aera, how can you speak like that about your father's brother? he has a daughter too, do you think any father can do something like that? you're putting really disgusting allegations on him and mark my words you'll regret it!"

aera sags nothing, staring out of the window while jaehyun just shakes his head, somewhat annoyed too with her behaviour, but probably didn't say anything because eunmi already did. and he had nothing different to tell her anyway.

"i really hope this doctor will knock some sense into you," the mother mutters, confirming to aera once again that her therapy isn't supposed to be about her trauma and depression, but to brainwash her into believing that she's doing wrong by saying jaemin assaulted her.

"why don't you kill me?" aera asks softly, "it's gonna be a lot better... time saving... money saving..."

"are you out of your mind?!" jaehyun sneers this time, "god you really do need help! how can you even think about dying, aera? you're our daughter, think about us. why are you being like that?"

"i'm being selfish," aera repeats, nodding slowly, "right..."

nobody speaks further and aera too just looks up when they're in front of the hospital. jaehyun and eunmi walk ahead, aera follows them quietly into the elevator once confirming the floor for the therapist, dr. kim who's one of the most renowned psychologists in seoul. the  hallway seemed mostly empty, other than one family walking out of the doctor's office, making aera sigh, knowing that they're next.

"hello dr. kim," jaehyun smiles, entering past the glass door and holds it open for his wife and daughter too.

"mr jeon am i right?" the doctor looks up from the file his assistant gave him and jaehyun nods, returning the man's smile, "good to see you, please have a seat,"

aera sighs softly, sitting next to her mother on the third chair, keeping her eyes low even when the doctor glances at her, hoping for a smile or at least a hello. he smiles still, not saying anything to girl and turns to her parents, "yes so, you're here for your daughter from what i take from the papers," he says, getting sighs from the parents as they nod.

"yeah, we didn't really want to, but things have been quite upsetting with us. and she needs some help," eunmi speaks, getting a slow nod from the doctor who tries his best to ignore the disappointment mixed with sarcasm in her tone.

"is there anything in particular that you want me to know before we start with the counseling and therapy?"

"not really, but she's quite impulsive if that helps you little," jaehyun says.

dr. kim decides to ignore that and turns to face aera herself this time, "hello aera, how have you been?"

"good," aera mumbles.

"that's nice, oh— well, i didn't tell you my name yet," he smiles, "i'm kim namjoon, it's nice to meet you,"

"i'm jeon aera," she nods subtly, never looking at him, her hands in her lap, fiddling with the hem of her coat against her sweaty palms.

"what's this aera? look at him when he's talking to you," eunmi nudges her slightly from the side, making the girl flinch, looking up instantly at namjoon and notices he has dimples. but they disappear quickly as he's not smiling anymore.

"mrs. jeon, it's fine, let her be comfortable. i'm still a stranger to her, so no worries," namjoon tells the mother who just smiles a little, yet eyeing the daughter to behave herself, making namjoon sigh, "i guess you guys should wait outside so we can start with our session for today?" he says, glancing his assistant who nods and gestures her hand for the parents to move outside.

jaehyun and eunmi stand up, heading out of the room, leaving aera alone, restlessly staring at their back, having a deep urge to stop them. "hey, aera aren't you feeling a little hot in that? do you wanna take off the coat?" namjoon asks, getting a glance fron the girl as she frowns, shaking her head quickly, her arms automatically wrapping around the coat in a subtle protective manner.

"uh alright, so tell me about yourself," he asks again, smiling at her softly, noticing how she looked unbreathably uncomfortable about something. sweat forms on her forehead, but she refuses to take of the coat or even look at namjoon directly.

"i- i'm seventeen," she speaks after a moment of silence.

"anything else? what do you like to do or something? your hobbies?"

"no..." she shakes her head, "can i get some wa-water please?"

"sure," namjoon nods with a smile and slides his glass of water towards her, taking off the cover from the top, "if you don't mind may i ask you something?"

aera hums softly, taking a sip and namjoon watches her carefully, "you're jimin's sister aren't you? jeon jimin...?"

aera looks up at the mention of her brother's name and nods, "he lives in sydney," she says.

"i know, i'm friends with him and jungkook too in fact. i was shocked to see your name in my patients files, but then i wasn't sure if it was actually you," he confesses and aera nods slowly.

"uhm sir, even if you're friends with them, please don't tell them that i'm here... for- for therapy y'know?"

"why?" namjoon frowns, "are you not in good terms with them?"

"mom said not to tell them," aera nibbles on her lip, taking another sip of water.

"alright if you say so. how often do you talk to jimin and jungkook? jimin also has a son, have you seen him?"

"just in pictures," aera says, "we don't really talk... i don't have a phone and they're also busy so..."

"you don't have a phone?"

"no,"

"and why is that? i mean most of the teens get phones pretty early these days,"

"i never had one, there's no need,"

"then like how do you contact your friends or someone you wanna talk to?"

"i'm home schooled..."

"that's... uhm do you like it?"

"yeah," she nods and namjoon takes a moment to observe her nicely, before smiling and jots down the little things he got to know about her.

it just being the first day and not wanting to make aera any more uncomfortable than she already was when her parents walked back in, namjoon dismissed the session early, saying they'll meet again the next day. he told the parents to take her home for now and he'll talk to them over the phone as he didn't feel like they would give much importance to his words. also having a deep sense of urgency to talk to jimin first about the case for he could see some really questionable things in aera's behaviour and how her parents had kept her disconnected from the world around her.

namjoon sits in his chair, calling on jimin's number, even though aera's words ring in his ears, making his brows knit together in confusion as he fails to understand why mr and mrs jeon won't discuss something so important with their eldest who's also a doctor by profession. so he calls nonetheless, sighing when jimin answers, "hey jimin,"

"hyung, hi. how're you?" jimin speaks, a smile evident in his voice which makes namjoon smile as well.

"i'm good, what about you? all good— work, family...?"

"yeah, everything 's great. i was just going to call you yesterday, actually one of my friends here need some help with his son. the kid is suicidal," jimin sighs, "i feel bad for the kids these days,"

"sure, give them my number," namjoon says, "also speaking of this, have you been talking to your sister lately?"

"uh no," jimin hesitates, "how should i put this... uhm she doesn't really talk y'know? even if me and kook try, she just won't talk. why are you asking?"

"look, don't get too worried, but they came here today— i mean, your parents and aera. she's up for therapy,"

"what?" jimin sounds confused, more shocked from what namjoon can tell, "therapy for what?"

"the file didn't mention anything clearly, i'm sure your parents filled out the details. please don't get me wrong, but i think you should look into it. the kid didn't look like she was having a good time,"

"all of this sounds crazy to me hyung. they were in america last week when i talked to dad, when did they even come to seoul?" jimin breathes out in exasperation, "forget it, tell me is aera okay? what exactly happened?"

"it was just the first day today, jimin. i can't say for sure, but it's something realy serious. maybe ptsd or something like that,"

"ptsd? god... thanks for telling me hyung, i'll try talking at home. mom and dad can be too much at times,"

"yeah please do that. it really bugged me how they treat her y'know?"

"what does that mean?"

"means they look kinda... controlling? manipulative?" namjoon speaks carefully, not wanting to offend his friend and sighs, "she wasn't comfortable speaking in front of them, but then she wasn't comfortable with them leaving too. they're messing up your sister's life in some really bad way, i can see it. i hope aera will open up about it soon,"

"do you think i should talk to her?"

"no, she told me not to tell you or jungkook. i only called because things looked bad with her."

"why would she say that?"

"i asked her the same, but she said your mom told her not to tell you anything. about therapy and other stuff i assume,"

"wow..." jimin chuckles lightly, sounding sad on the line, "never thought i'd be coming to know all this from you— from anyone like this actually."

"hey jimin, i'm sure they didn't want to worry you—"

"not helping hyung,"

"i'm sorry,"

"it's not your fault, don't be sorry. anyway i'll look into it, thanks for letting me know."

•••

a week later

aera liked namjoon. she liked how he would listen to her and wouldn't stare at her like others did. she felt comfortable in his office without her parents now and even their conversations were getting more warm. like he would ask how her day went, if she wanted to eat something or draw, and would join her in the activity too. yesterday he had even ordered a pizza while they talked about her favourite movies and shows.

in the seven days that she got with namjoon till now, she could call him her first ever friend.

as aera gets ready in her room, she sighs softly, hearing her parents' voice— jaehyun telling her that they're leaving for work now. but then the door of her is opened and comes in her mother with a nervous smile, "your brother called," she says without wasting a second, "they're coming home today. me and your dad will come back on monday, so for these two days with them, behave yourself okay? don't any unnecessary drama or have whatever attacks you call them get it?"

aera blinks a few times, frowning subtly, "i don't do it on purpo—"

"yeah, i know that," she sighs, patting the girl's head and kisses her forehead, "just take care of things here. your therapy thingy will be on hold for the time jimin and jungkook are here okay? i didn't tell them, and you won't tell them either yeah?"

aera nods to that, making eunmi smile before she's out leaving the room, "mom wait," aera calls, following after her and gulps, "who's coming again? just jimin and jungkook?"

"jimin, haewon, their son and jungkook," eunmi specifies dismissively, "jae! i'm ready, let's go,"

jaehyun arrives then, securing his wrist watch and smiles at aera, "bye sweetheart, take care,"

"bye dad, bye mom," aera smiles back, "have a safe trip,"

"thank you," eunmi waves at her, walking out of the house and aera sighs deeply, looking down at her feet that lead back to her room, taking off the jacket and shoes that she had put on thinking it's time to go to namjoon for their daily session.

she lays on the bed, grabbing the remote of the tv. and puts on the same show again, then closes her eyes to sleep. however it doesn't quiver the fact she just lays there with her eyes closed, having no traces of sleep until an hour passes and she decides it's better to eat something instead.

walking down, she hears a car stopping in front of the house. she frowns, looking out of the window and gasps on seeing a raging jaemin storming out of the car. before she rushes to the front door to lock it, a maid has already showed up and welcoming the man inside.

"aera!" jaemin calls in a firm voice, making her flinch. she tries to quietly head back to her room, although he comes in front of her with a glare, catching her arm and drags her upstairs himself. "why did you think you could tell about this to sana huh?" he grits in anger, pushing her inside the room and locks the door.

"i didn— ah!"

aera looks at the man with teary eyes, being pushed back on her bed as he's already unbuckling his belt, "let me show you how bad you fucked up opening that mouth of yours to my daughter. you're just a filthy little slut!"

"aahh!"

__________

a/n- i was relly mad for no reason on people who commit such crimes thinking it's okay to go against someone's wishes and touching them, forcing them for sex or anything literally. so once again even though we have sexual assault chapters, here we go again. every time i try to show up a different aspect. please read this till the end to know aera's story and through that, many other pleadings, urges and complains from all over the world. i'm not generalising anything, but just one fighter can be a big step. so please stay tuned ⚡

and ofcourse never stop yourself from raising voice for the right cause 💜

also with each scene and and the story line you'll know why the name of the chapter is called "Smile, Aera"

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