please do comment, it's been a while since i last updated and we couldn't even interact.

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after the prom, aera got no time to sit idle. from surfing the web almost all nights long and giving up on her sleeps as she was busy finding good universities and courses for her, which also annoyed her at times, seeing most of them already done with accepting this year's applicants and the fact that she's late.

jungkook too helped her out a lot, sitting with her and discussing about different career options, pay scale and opportunities in each filed for her, that she felt unexplainably thankful for. she didn't hesitate at all in waking him up at the weirdest hour to ask about a certain scheme that caught her attention on the internet, or to vent out about how the process is so frustrating that she feels like it would be better to just sit at home and do nothing for the rest of her life.

even now aera's hand pushes away the laptop lazily, leaning back on her swivelling chair as she turns around and forces herself to get up, dragging her feet to her brother's room, not minding that it's already past two and he might be asleep for he needs to work in the morning. she opens the door without much thought and sighs, seeing jungkook arching up his brow as he pulls the headphone from his one ear.

"i don't know what to do... my future is all dark. do you think you can feed me all my life and pay my expenses?" she mumbles, massaging her temples as she flops on the bed beside him over the covers, making the brother sigh deeply.

"stop stressing out so much, aera. it's gonna be fine," he pats her back and she shakes her head, burying her face in the pillow, kicking her legs in the air and her arms hitting the bed. "you need sleep, kiddo. go and rest for a while,"

"i can't sleep..." aera looks up at him with teary eyes and points at her face, "i've dark circles under my eyes and my face looks dull, all of it thanks to my fucked up sleeping schedule!"

"who's responsible for it?" jungkook looks at his laptop, disconnecting the headphones and puts on the movie, placing the laptop a little away, "get inside the covers, i lowered the temperature of the ac earlier."

"yeah it's a bit chilly," aera nods, slipping next to him and hugs his arm, "how did you decide what you wanna do?" jungkook chuckles, stroking her hair and drapes his arm around aera, letting her snuggle onto him and pauses the movie for he feels a long conversation surfacing slowly, "y'know everybody knows what they wanna do and they're working for it already! i'm the only dumb person who has absolutely zero idea about my future and doesn't even know what i wanna become! high school is over, i need to get into a good college, get a degree and a job to make my life not suck... so much work and i haven't even started yet... god i feel like i'm gonna die..."

"relax," jungkook tells her, patting her back then pulls away and glances at her with a mischievous grin, "wanna get a drink?"

"drink as in...?"

"soju," jungkook chuckles, "get up, we're going out,"

"why am i suddenly allowed to drink?" aera gasps, sitting up straight but agrees right away as she stands up on her feet, grabbing one of jungkook's hoodies and puts it on over her crop top, "i hope you won't get me trouble with jiminie,"

"nobody will know a thing," he assures, "since you're already eighteen, done with high school and stressing out like an old person, i can see this is important. so let's get it," he takes her hand, pulling her downstairs with him once he's a grabbed a jacket for himself and put on his shoes. aera does the same, securing the velcro of her shoes and follows jungkook out.

"aren't we taking the car?" she looks at him with a frown and he shakes his head, making her shrug her shoulders, jogging to catch up with him for he's already a few steps ahead. "where are we going?"

jungkook nods his head in the forward direction, which means they're going down the block probably to the convenience store that also sells liquor for she had seen jungkook paying frequent visits there especially when daniel would drop by. aera walks beside him in silence, watching their shadow growing, shrinking, changing sides around them as they pass the streetlights. but the size difference between her and jungkook remains the same, making her smile and pull out her phone.

"oppa wait," she speaks, holding her phone in front of her and clicks a picture of the tall and short pair of shadows, making jungkook laugh. he does a peace sign over his head, pulling aera in a side hug, making her laugh as she clicks another picture.

"now seeing this people can tell which one is the kid," jungkook snickers, pointing at her petite shadow next to his giant one.

aera gives him a sarcastic smile completing his sentence on a better side, "and they can also tell who's the old man,"

"who are you calling old?" jungkook huffs at her, "i'm 27, that's still young,"

"no, that's old," aera laughs, linking her arm with his and looks up, heaving out a deep breath, "when did you start working- and how did you know what to do?"

jungkook looks straight ahead, thinking for a moment as he hums softly, "it was after high school and pretty late too," he admits, "actually during high school i just saw hyung going to the company- being a businessman y'know? suits and ties, formal language, balance sheets, money, deals, clients, that's something we grew up hearing a lot. so i used to think i'll do that too, but as i grew up- and especially saw hyung giving up his actual dreams for- uh wait," he hesitates, glancing at the sister who's frowning at him, making him smile nervously.

aera gasps, covering her mouth and stops on her track, "he gave up his dreams? what does that mean? gosh! there are things i don't know!" she exasperates, "tell me everything, i'm eighteen, i'm a big girl and i deserve to know!" she huffs, crossing her arms and jungkook chuckles.

"alright there big girl," he ruffles her hair, walking slowly on the pedestrian alone at night, just the two of them for it's actually a very odd time to be roaming around. "hyung told me not to bring these things up because you were young and we felt like you didn't need to know. so i'm gonna leave his part for him to tell you, if he wants. but let's carry on with my part okay?"

aera sighs softly, nodding her head and listens attentively as jungkook continues, "so yeah, i saw hyung giving some things up and started going office with dad instead. but he always told me to do what i want- what i feel happy and contented with. i'll be honest here, i had no idea what makes me happy other than my videogames until i was eighteen. just like you. i used to talk to the hyungs, and they all just told me that it's okay and i can take my time to figure things out. i carried on with college and in the very first year itself, i realised that if videogames make me happy, then when why not just carrying on with it."

aera smiles at that, nodding her head and gives him a impressed look, "you have no idea how cool you sound right now,"

"i do have an idea, i'm the coolest man okay?" he flexes, but carries on, "so that's when i stole hyung's card and called manager lee- now he is a great man! he has always been there whenever i needed him." he laughs and aera chuckles too.

"yeah so anyway, i got myself a whole gaming set up- the one with quad l.e.d., a camera and a gaming chair. i started playing and recording for youtube just like that, then people started liking it and they started subscribing and all. i didn't let anyone come in my room for almost three months, because they didn't know about my gaming and the things i bought."

"you were risking your life there," aera laughs and jungkook sighs, remembering the fear of being caught he had back then.

"everyday was an adventure." he admits, "but it was fun. tae was the first one who came to know and he was super excited. he said he loved what i was doing, and then he joined me too. now we both were walking on thin ice together. we shifted in my room and stayed there playing, recording, editing most of the time. but one day i forgot to lock the door and jin hyung came inside... he couldn't believe his eyes and i couldn't believe my eyes.

"the hyungs scolded me and tae a lot, but mostly me because i bought all those expensive things with jimin hyung's card without him knowing. also, that's how you know the family is rich, if you steal a black card and buy what you want without the owner of the card knowing."

aera snickers at that, glancing at jungkook, "do you think i ever stole your card too?"

"obviously," he smirks, "why do you think i keep it in the front drawer and not somewhere way safer than that?"

aera gasps, staring at him with eide eyes, "i thought you were just stupid!"

"well turns out that you're stupid," he scoffs.

"i do really feel stupid for thinking that- but thanks for leaving it there,"

"yeah yeah, what do you even get from it?" he asks out of curiosity and aera grins mischievously.

"stuff,"

"geez, okay," he sighs, "anyway so, they were mad but then with time they accepted it as it was. later hyung even gifted me different cameras because i liked photography and that's how i started directing. i was starting to make money. and i remember from my first payment, i took everyone out for a fancy dinner-"

"me too?" aera chirps.

"obviously, i'm pretty sure you're a part of the family too," he says and aera nods with sass, making him laugh, "then i made my own tracks and music. i had a lot of trouble recording at home, so hyung bought me a place and handed me his card- plus i also had my own money too, to get that place renovated the way i want and that would be my studio." he smiles at the memory and glances at aera, "you know how things went after that,"

"how old were you when you got the studio?"

"twenty," jungkook says and points forward, making aera look ahead, breaking into a smile as she finds them in front of the convenience store already. she follows him inside, straight to the big refrigerator that stores alcoholic drinks and beverages.

"you said soju..." aera whispers to him and jungkook hisses under his breath, grabbing two bottles of soju in one hand and a vodka in the other.

"shush, you saw nothing," he kicks the door close and heads to counter, "grab some snacks if you want,"

"okay," aera shrugs, quickly getting two packs of spicy chips and puts them with the drinks for billing. jungkook pays quickly, winking at the girl behind the counter and slips in his number casually, making aera roll her eyes. "you're so weird, get a grip already,"

"wasn't she pretty?" he sighs.

"yeah, but you shouldn't do that! it's embarassing!"

"shut up," he scoffs, "where to?"

"i don't know, wherever you want," aera shrugs her shoulders, walking beside him. she doesn't say anything when they head towards home, knowing that it was better to walk back home than walk in search of another place right now in the middle of the night on foot.

even when they arrive in front of the house, jungkook doesn't go inside. rather, he heads to the backyard, sitting on the swing and nods aera to sit with him as well. she sits next to him as he pops open the bottle of soju with a keychain he had of the shape of an opener. he hands one bottle to aera and keeps the other for himself, chuckling when the sister hesitates.

"just take it, it's fine," he says, sipping from his bottle and hums at the strong taste, "i know you've had alcohol before,"

"it was at a party," she nods, taking a sip and coughs a little, then takes anothr one and sighs at the taste, "someone or the other would surely be there and like, aera let's have a drink. i've turned down so many people because i'm not into alcohol yet,"

"drunk guys are a straight no-no," jungkook tells her and she laughs, nodding her head, "i mean they're stupid y'know? they're gonna say the weirdest shit and pull the craziest stunts. and most of the time it's not pleasant," he snickers.

"and girls?" aera arches up a brow, taking another sip and jungkook snorts laughing as he leans back, throwing his head backwards and his eyes crinkling close.

"girls are..." he thinks, "drunk girls are gorgeous until they throw up on you,"

"ew!" aera cringes and jungkook looks at her.

"no i'm serious," he nods, "do you know hana?"

"uh yeah, riah's sister's friend? the one you-"

"you know too much," jungkook hisses, chugging down another sip and nods anyway, "but yeah that hana. she's so bad with alcohol but still goes drinking. chelsea was like okay-okay, and their other friend jia, she was the real y'know- tough girl. she's wild. she had a high tolerance for alcohol- all kinds, she would ditch her dates to hangout with us. back in college she fought this dude who teased her about being short. she literally has no limits,"

"wow..." aera chuckles amusedly, "sounds like me,"

"well, not really. i know her way more than this," he laughs.

"it's weird y'know how you hooked up with every single person- like not even leaving chelsea unnie's friends. and it's kinda- well, it is wrong," she speaks in a slow voice, careful with her words, not wanting to press any wrong buttons right now. jungkook looks at her and nods eventually, making her sigh, "i shouldn't have said that, sorry,"

"sometimes i really wish i could tell you everything. it hurts when my own sister thinks of me like that," he says with a sad smile, downing the rest of the soju at once and wipes his mouth, "but i know what i did was wrong, so it's fine."

"i don't think you're a jerk," aera confirms, making him chuckle and give her look of thanks, which makes her smile too, "i know how things were between you and chelsea unnie, riah talked about it. she brings you up a lot,"

jungkook frowns at the information, "and says what?"

"things that i make me wanna chop off her hair," aera hisses, "hey listen, i need some really serious advice, then we'll get to the college and career stuff okay?"

"go on,"

"uhm did you ever feel like you're coming between two people? like- two people who like each other, could date and all but then you're there so they can't really get to it."

"it's jake and riah?" jungkook chuckles and aera sighs, nodding her head.

"clay and soomin too. i'm coming between four people, can you imagine that?! i feel like an asshole!"

"are you coming between them or your boys are dragging you in?"

"they just don't leave me alone, not like i want them to leave me alone. but what i always tell them is to pay attention to riah and soomin too. but they don't realise it- especially jake, he just straight up refuses to see that me being with him hurts riah."

jungkook stays quiet, nodding his head as a faint smile makes it's way to his lips, "riah's just chelsea isn't she? dan told me, jake really has been good friends with him,"

"yeah, i heard it." aera sighs, "riah as her sister, jake as you and me... well, the other girl. i don't wanna be the other girl, that sucks."

"you're not the other girl, ri. you're his best friend and for all i've known the boys so far, they'll put you first no matter what." jungkook assures.

"i know and that's weird... riah and soomin really like them and always make them their first choice. but these two idiots can't-"

"aera, you cannot force someone to feel a certain way about someone else," jungkook says, "if they're not doing anything about their thing with those girls, then they probably don't want to. forcing up relationships can get so messy, angel, both the people just end up hurting each other and getting hurt themselves."

aera nods slowly, taking a sip from her almost forgotten drink and leans onto her brother, "i wanna study abroad," she mumbles out, not taking it the previous subject any further, "i can't keep feeling guilty, thinking that they could've had a good time together and dated and stuff, but it didn't happen because of me."

"now that's stupid. i told you it's not your fault-"

"but i feel that way, and i- i can't bring myself to un-see or un-hear those things that go on around about me." she sighs deeply, looking up at jungkook who's staring back at her with a soft gaze, "i've got the forms for universities in sydney, new york and london. i wanna go to one these places, whichever you say is the best,"

"you're just running away,"

"i gotta do something right? about my future, for my life. the image i have here is cool, but absurd. and it's suffocating at times. i've been thinking about this for a while now oppa, i wanna get out of here and start everything fresh. i'll study and work and explore and do everything in a new place,"

jungkook smiles at that, rubbing her back and kisses her forehead, "sydney is a great place, i won't say new york because we've been there so it won't be that new. and not london, because accent,"

aera laughs at that, hugging him tightly and kisses his cheek, "i love you!"

"hm thanks," he chuckles, pulling away and pats her head, "have you looked at the course yet?"

"yeah a little, do you think i can do law?"

"of course, people take law that's why it's an available course," he says, "but are you sure? i mean it's not really a stable line of field. i mean, it has it's own pros and cons. make sure you've gone through them before you come to a decision,"

"it's a thrilling job oppa, just imagine me in the court! fighting for the innocent and sometimes to defend the accused. it's gonna be fun, plus it pays well."

"it does pay well with experience," jungkook nods, "so you wanna study law?"

"i guess so, it's interesting y'know? criminology, advocacy, legal and illegal issues."

jungkook hesitates a little but nods for his sister, not wanting to discourage her by telling her all the negative things about the job. but then he also finds contemplating over the thought that there's no job which is entirely safe. all of them have their own risks to some degrees. so he might as well let aera go on and explore, and if there's some problem ever then he's already here to handle.

"fine," he smiles, "talk to jiminie too in the morning. we'll fill out the form then,"

"yeah," she nods, "but oppa, do you think i'll be able to live alone?"

"why not? everybody has to live alone at some point," jungkook chuckles.

"you didn't live alone,"

"i will, when you move to sydney,"

"noooo! you go with me," she hugs his arms, "i don't wanna live without you..."

"i work here, princess,"

"expand your work, you have a studio in paris, in tokyo and even in l.a. why not in sydney now? please go with me, you promised to stay with me forever,"

"we'll talk about it to hyung first okay?" he sighs, keeping the bottles of soju away and stands up, pulling aera with him, "now let's go inside, i'm kinda sleepy,"

"if you don't go with me, i won't leave this place and just stay here in a burrow,"

"are you drunk?" jungkook scrunches up his face.

•••

next day

"noona!" jiwon chirps as aera crouches down, hugging the boy tightly and carries him up, "i mish you noona,"

"aw i missed you more," she smiles, kissing his cheek and sits with her brother on the couch. haewon smiles at the two, placing two glasses of water and some cookies on the table for them.

"haewon-ah," jimin's voice calls from inside, "where's my- oh nevermind, found it!"

"daddy! noona and uncle koo here," jiwon jumps down, running to his parents' room and brings jimin out, dragging him to the living room, not even letting him put on his t-shirt.

"yeah, i know," he sighs, hugging the brother and then the sister, "what's up?"

"i'm here to make a really big decision and i want your help," aera says, making him sit with her and gestures haewon to sit as well. "so as you know i've been looking for different universities for my graduate's degree. last night me and jungkookie were talking about it and i said i wanna do it from australia- sydney."

jimin nods slowly, glancing at jungkook who nods as well, "i said it would be okay, sydney is a nice place to live and study." he says.

"study what?" jimin asks.

"uhm law," aera says, "i like the job of lawyers, and i think i can do something nice,"

"lawyer," jimin hums, thinking about it and glances at his wife, then back at aera, "don't get me wrong, kiddo. but lawyers aren't uhm how should i put this... it's a great job, but being a lawyer isn't easy. y'know it's kinda risky- the insides of the job aren't that pleasant like what it looks from the outside,"

"i understand that oppa, i looked it up. it's not really a favourable job for women mostly, from what the web said, but who cares right? it's an adventurous job, i'll meet new people all the time, i'll have to use my brain to work things out and help people. i'll grow and learn something everyday. i wanna be a lawyer," she smiles, making the elders smile as well.

"my little girl isn't scared of anything hm?" jimin ruffles her hair and she giggles.

"nope," she sits straight, taking jimin's laptop from the table and shifts closer to him, "can i submit the form then?"

"go ahead," he smiles, "you've already made me proud so many times, and even now when you talk like this about achieving your dreams and living your life the way you want, it make me happy."

"oh that reminds me of," she glances at jungkook, who gasps shaking his head quickly but aera doesn't listen, "koo said you gave up your dreams. what does that mean? you didn't want to be a businessman since the beginning?"

jimin turns to jungkook, seeing him smiling nervously and rubs the back of neck, "it just slipped out..."

jimin sighs, looking at aera again and smiles softly, "it was dad's dream. he wanted me to take over his business empire, because he believed that i would do great here. so for that obviously i had to take time and study business, focus on my academics more y'know? that's all that happened, you were still pretty young then,"

"what dream did you give up and why? why didn't you tell dad that you wanted to do something else?"

"it's fine, ri. it's not a big deal and right now, let's focus on you," he says, taking laptop and opens the official website of university of sydney.

"yeah, but tell me. you always said that i should do what makes me happy, and not to fear if i have to say no to someone-"

"for us," jungkook says, keeping his eyes low, "he could've fought dad and left to live his dreams. seriously, he could've straight up tell dad that he'd go for the match that day and leave. but he didn't. he stayed for us, so that we can live how we want."

"jungkook," jimin shakes his head, "it was all past. let's not talk about it right now,"

"really?" aera looks at jimin, making him sigh, "i didn't know all this..."

"he was selected for the soccer semi finals in daegu. he was the captain," jungkook says with a smile, "but mom and dad had to go for a business tri-"

"it's okay, kook," jimin says, "what i did was my choice and i have no regrets about it. i'm in a better position than i would've been if i chose something else. let it go, it's fine,"

"of course it's fine, but still what i saw still doesn't leave me," jungkook sighs, shifting near aera and pats her back, "anyway, fill the form,"

aera nods quietly, doing as he said and feels a hand on her back, glancing at jimin who nods assuringly, "don't worry about me, just focus on yourself. i'm done making my career, and so is kook. we're happy with our jobs and the life we built for ourselves. now it's your turn, princess."

she smiles at him and with much more confidence than before, clicks on the 'register' option displaying on the screen. haewon gives her an excited smile, encouraging her to carry on and that they all support her in this. aera focuses on the screen, typing in the details required and glances at jungkook, "i'm putting your number too, just in case,"

jungkook shrugs casually, smiling as aera puts the laptop down showing a thank you page while she nibbles on her lip nervously, "uhm i don't think i'll get in..."

"you never know," haewon says, shutting off the laptop and pulls awra up, "now shopping?"

"today?"

haewon shrugs, turning to the men who smile, getting up, "great! let's go, we gotta get a lot of stuff if you're going to sydney!" haewon says, and her son jumps on the couch, clapping his hands for absolutely no reason- well other than that his elders looked happy.

"i-"

"let's go, don't think too much," jimin kisses her forehead, making her smile.

"guys," jungkook says, scrolling through his phone, "if riri gets in, she'd have to leave by the end of this month,"

aera whines at that, shaking her head, "i won't go without you!"

jimin laughs at her, "c'mon it's fine, you'll study there and be a big girl. make us and yourself proud,"

"yeah but i want one of you with me... i won't live all alone in a different country over those big oceans... no..."

"let's leave that for when you actually have to move out okay?" jungkook says, bringing her in a hug as he wraps his one arm around her and one around haewon, "let's go out today and have some fun,"

"okay yeah," she nods, responding to haewon's high five and carries jiwon up in her arms, "we're gonna go out, ji,"

"yayy!" the boy cheers.

"aera, have you told your friends yet?" haewon asks, "moving to sydney if you get in, is a big thing. you should talk to them,"

"i don't think i'll make it unnie," aera shrugs, "so there's no need to worry for now. both of them will study here, so i'll have plenty of time to discuss things with them too when it's time,"

haewon smiles, nodding at that and pats her arm, "i hope you get what you want,"

"thanks unnie, i hope so too,"

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a/n- this update is just to let you know that i'm alive and i miss you guys. also please don't be waiting for frequently updates because i seriously don't have enough time to stop and write new chapters. but i'll definitely try to upload in a while whenever i'm free that can be in weeks or sometimes maybe even in months. i don't wanna make fake promises to keep you waiting and wasting your time too, so it'll be great if you know these things already.

thank you for waiting for me and still supporting me through everything even though things are being pretty hard with me in real life (sorry).

please take care of yourself, love yourself and know that you're more than enough 💜✨

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