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Two Tales

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We have much to discuss.

The words seemed to just hang there.

I agreed with her on that point as my heart pounded rapidly. I had so many questions for Caitriona, one of them being - how was she even alive? Lottie and Stephen had told me their mother had died, years ago. I had watched both of them grieve at her gravestone; which was near where we had laid Stephen to rest. Years following her supposed death.

Slowly lifting my gaze upward, I looked at Caitriona standing near the window with her arms folded across her chest. If she was uncomfortable with the situation, her posture certainly didn't show it. She looked calm and collected. Then again, she already had a few days to process the information I was just now learning.

I took a hesitant step toward her, but before I could begin to ask her those questions, I first needed to apologise for my appalling behaviour upon her arrival. I had acted like a jealous schoolgirl and wasn't very welcoming. I had acted like a brat and I knew it. Jealousy was not a good colour on me.

Caitriona motioned for me to have a seat on the bed. I slowly exhaled a breath and did as she asked. She then sat beside me. With a warm smile, she grabbed my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. She looked so much like Lottie that my eyes began to mist because I missed my dear friend. I wish I knew Lottie was somewhere safe, but I had no idea the fate that had befallen my sister-in-law.

Like the gentle mother I never had, Caitriona wiped the stray tear that had slipped down my cheek. "Where should we begin?" she asked.

I hung my head in shame and could feel my cheeks begin to redden. "Before we begin, I must confess to you. I–I saw you walking in on Jamie's arm and I'm ashamed to admit I became quite jealous with no foundation but my addled mind."

Caitriona threw her head back and laughed. "The lad grows rather quickly on ye, doesn't he?"

I slowly lifted my head to see a rather large grin on her face. She gently pressed her hand to my cheek and gave it a motherly pat. "I've seen the lad every once in a while since he was quite young. But it wasn't until he came to Leoch that he got the chance to charm me. He was tryin' to prove himself to the other men on his first hunting party. He charmed me ever so terribly, that I gave him the cow he was tryin' ta steal. I've considered him a distant son ever since."

The word son panged my chest. I absently reached for my necklace and pursed my lips. My thoughts were no longer on Jamie but instead focused on Stephen. I couldn't make eye contact with her, not knowing what I knew.

"I suppose I ought to go first," I mumbled.

Caitriona squeezed my free hand. She probably had some sort of motherly expression on her face, but I still couldn't look at her. "If yer comfortable wi' that," she cooed gently like she was talking to a young child.

I glanced up to see the caring expression on her face. It seemed that she truly meant the words she spoke. But it didn't make things any easier. This was still going to be one of the hardest conversations of my life. Granted, I had already spilt the beans that her son was dead, but I still had to tell her about Lottie.

I sighed, then squared my shoulders to tell my tale. "I met Lottie at medical school."

Caitriona's eyes widened. "Lottie? Medical school? Truly?"

I smiled. Such a typical mother's response. I tucked a lock of hair behind my ear and softly smiled back at her. "Yes. A women's medical school training us to become doctors."

"My daughter. A doctor. I always ken she was capable of great things."

"Given her talent with herbs and such medicines, she was a natural. But she did tell me that she attended medical school to keep her father from marrying her off before she was ready."

Caitriona pursed her lips. "Does she have her practice? Or did Stephen Sr. marry her off already?"

I shook my head. This was one of the easier details to break to Catriona, but it would lead to much harder ones. I twisted my cross between my fingers. "We were called into service on the war front. Although we were treated as glorified nurses rather than the title we had earned."

With a furrowed brow, Caitriona asked, "War front? Who was at war?"

I inhaled slowly. "It was another world war," I said slowly.

Caitriona's eyes widened in horror. But I continued.

"Germany invaded Poland. The German leader, Adolph Hitler, was intent on exterminating Jews and those he considered undesirable. We still don't know how many were lost. From the reports I've read, a great number I imagine. Great Britain entered the war. The United States, where I'm from, remained rather neutral until Japan bombed Pearl Harbor, in Hawaii where the US kept almost all of their naval fleet. Then the United States joined the war . . ."

"My God," Caitriona gasped with her hand placed over her heart.

"We won," I hesitated. "Not that there was a trophy or anything to win. I mean, The Allies - Great Britain, The United States . . ."

Caitriona held up a lone finger. So I stopped prattling on because clearly, she needed some time to take that in. For me, it had simply been my life for the past few years. Caitriona had been out of time, so to speak, and this was all new to her.

I cleared my throat, allowing that information to settle in her mind. While it was a bad habit, I chewed my lips for a few moments before Caitriona motioned for me to continue.

"I'll tell you about Stephen, now," I said. She smiled softly, tears already threatening to spill.

"I met Stephen while in medical school. He was in London too and he would frequently take us out dancing or for dinner. Since I was alone, Lottie always insisted that I tag along and Stephen always seemed happy for me to come. Your children loved each other very much. Something I'm sure that you instilled in them."

She smiled softly with her gaze downward as a tear slipped down her cheek. My heartstrings tugged thinking of who must be on her mind. I wasn't a mother and there was a good chance I never would be, but that didn't stop my heart from hurting for Caitriona.

"Was yer marriage a happy one?" Caitriona asked.

I hesitated. I didn't want to hurt her, but she also deserved the truth. I looked at her and sighed. "Neither of us was in love with the other when we married," I said. "We cared for one another. But our marriage wasn't one built on love. It-it was convenient at the time for both of us."

I cleared my throat, refusing to look at her until I had finished. "My father died while I was in medical school. He was the only family I had left. Stephen Sr. was keeping Stephen from his money. Something about there being a clause about needing to be married. I didn't want to be alone and Stephen didn't trust his father with his money."

Caitriona was very quiet as she took in that information.

"I hope you're not angry . . ."

She reached out and took my hand. "It's no' you. Stephen Sr. cares only for himself. I had hoped he wouldna treat my son. I thought that perhaps he would. . ." Her words trailed. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm verra sorry ye got tangled up in all this, Ruthie."

"Tangled up in what?" I asked as my brow furrowed in confusion. I could tell that she wasn't telling me something.

But before I could press her further, she hoarsely asked me, "How? How did it happen? How did my son die?"

Tears began to stream down my cheeks as memories of the past year with Stephen began to flash through my mind. I knew that it had been hard on him. But it had also been an unbearable burden for me.

"He was a member of the parachute regiment during the war," I started between sobs. "They'd jump out of aeroplanes and parachute undetected to the ground. Stephen's - his chute - the wind was off that night. He landed in a tree paralyzing him from the waist down."

Caitriona's hand flew over her mouth.

"He made it home. But that wasn't the worst of it." I wiped my nose with my sleeve. "He had no control over his bodily functions. He–he couldn't tell when he was about to soil himself. Someone had to be with him at all times. Stephen didn't like feeling like an invalid around the staff. So, I usually sat with him and cleaned up after him. He was so angry during that time. I'd never seen him like that before. He wasn't angry with me, but he took it out on me."

I pulled a handkerchief from my pocket and gently blew my nose. But I wasn't done yet. "He–he then came down with pneumonia. He tried to fight it, but it was too much for him. I begged and pleaded with him to stay. But it was no use. I must've fallen asleep for a few moments because when I woke his hand wrapped in mine was cold. I told him I'd be there when it happened but . . ."

"Ye were," Caitriona sobbed, taking hold of my hand. "Ye were there. He had a hand to hold."

"Why didn't he wake me?" I cried. "I could have. . . I could have . . ."

Caitriona enveloped me in an embrace, holding me tightly against her. "There's nothing more ye could've done, lass. Ye cared for my son until the end an' for that I'm forever grateful." She rocked me gently like one would a child.

"But I didn't love him," I sobbed. "I wanted to love him. I did."

"Hush," Caitriona gently chided between sobs. "Ye might not have been in love wi' him, but from what ye've just told me I ken ye loved him in yer own way."

"You should hate me. I let your son die. I'm a doctor and he still died." I tried to pull away from her, but she held onto me tighter.

"Look at me," she commanded gently. I refused to meet her gaze and tried to pull away once more. But she had a good grasp on me. "Come now, lass."

With tears streaming down my face, a runny nose, and puffy eyes, I hesitantly looked at her unsure of what expression I was about to face. While Caitriona's face looked full of sorrow, it also appeared to care. It wasn't harsh, but soft.

"I canna hate ye," Caitriona said. "Yer my daughter. Maybe not of my own blood, but you're mine now. As long as yer here and as I live, I'll look after ye. Ye ken?"

"Ye shouldn't want me," I sobbed into her shoulder. "I'm a harbinger. I bring nothing but sorrow and misery and death."

That was the first time I had ever voiced those words aloud. I knew the truth, but I had never dared to speak it. My birth brought forth my mother's death. My father was gone. My husband was gone. Everywhere I went I left a wake of misery trailing behind me.

Caitriona didn't release me as I would have expected any sane person to do. Instead, she held me tighter and rubbed my back. I gave in to her embrace and allowed her to hold me. I let her act like a mother toward me. Not that I understood what it was like to do that.

When I felt almost in complete control of my faculties, I pulled away. "I feel like I've done nothing but cry since I arrived here," I said with a sniffle. "Truly, I'm not usually this weepy."

"What ye've been through lass is a lot to take in," Caitriona responded. "Believe me, I know. I've not only done it once. But twice."

"What?" I asked in amazement, attempting to dry my cheeks. "You've been here before? Was it before Lottie and Stephen?"

Caitriona nodded her head. "I first came through the stones when I was but sixteen. Colum's the one that found me after I came through the stones. The first time. He looked verra braw on his horse."

My brow furrowed. "Colum?"

"Aye," she said with a grin. Her gaze seemed far off as if reminiscing on the past. "His legs were no' always so bowed. The finest horseman too, before his accident. I canna remember exactly what it was he was doing near the fairy stones, but he saw me and took pity on me. Then he brought me back to Leoch and I was treated much the same as you, I'm guessing."

"What do you mean?"

"Women glaring at ye behind yer back because of Jamie, aye?"

I shrugged my shoulder. While the womenfolk of Leoch hadn't been all that welcoming to me, I assumed it was because I was a stranger. "I haven't been here all that long yet," I offered.

Caitriona chuckled. "Ye arrived on horseback wi' Jamie, no?"

"Yes, but . . . " My face began to blush furiously. "They just . . .Well, I am a stranger and . . ."

She grinned at me. "It's because of the lad, lass. Most of the womenfolk here are smitten wi' Jamie, much like yourself."

"Oh," was all I could respond. And rather lamely at that. So, it seemed like I was just another woman in a long line of women. Hardly anything special, it seemed. Why was I like this?

"Not that the lad's ever taken up a special interest in any of them before." Caitriona looked at me knowingly. "That is, until you."

I scoffed. Although, I didn't mean to make it loud enough for her to hear.

Caitriona took my hands in hers. "That lad talked more about ye in the few minutes it took to escort me than I've ever heard him talk about another lass the entire time I've known him. He's smitten wi' ye too."

I wasn't sure I could bear much more of the direction in which the conversation was going. So, I quickly returned it back to Caitriona's first time here. "Tell me more about when you arrived, please."

She looked at me knowingly, letting me know that we would circle back to Jamie eventually. Caitriona nodded her head and folded her hands on her lap. She then looked toward the door, as if expecting an interruption. But when none came, she leaned toward me. "Colum and I were each other's, first loves. But we both knew it couldna work between us."

"Why?" I questioned.

"As future chieftain, it would hardly be appropriate for him to marry a strange woman with no past and no home. He had his clan to think about, aye?"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"We're no' in the twentieth century anymore, lass. Sure, he coulda wed me, but he woulda been giving up his right to chieftain. Didna think it right for Dougal to lead the clan someday and I agreed wi' him on that. That man has always wanted what wasna his. He's cunning enough to figure out how to get what it is he wants. Well, all but chieftain of clan MacKenzie."

My mind was still trying to keep up with all she had just told me, but Caitriona wasn't finished yet.

Caitriona sighed. "No' to mention his da, the chieftain at the time, had already planned on forming an alliance wi' the Chisolm clan by wedding Colum to Letitia. To break such an alliance for love . . ." she paused for a moment. "Well, ye can tell for yourself that he kept his part of it."

I pursed my lips for a moment. "Do you think Letitia knows about you?"

"I'm certain of it," Caitriona responded. "But there is no hatred between Letitia and me. We both ken our roles in all this."

"Do you think he still loves you?"

Caitriona thought for a moment before answering. "I 'spect he does. There's a piece of my heart that will always hold Colum there. I love my Geordie, but one never truly forgets their first love."

"You remarried?" I asked her.

"Oh aye," Caitriona said with a smile. "Geordie Campbell. He's a verra braw man. He takes verra good care of me."

I arched an eyebrow. "He wasn't with you when I arrived."

She sighed, her smile dimming. "Aye. Arrested. Captain Randall's convinced himself that Geordie helped Jamie escape from Fort William."

My eyes widened.

"Captain Randall ken nothing about the ongoing feud between MacKenzies and Campbells. A Campbell help a MacKenize? Pshaw." She then looked at me. "Although, a Campbell allowing a Mackenzie to steal a horse to two. Perhaps."

I thought I understood what she was saying. But I couldn't quite be sure. Thankfully, she continued and added clarification to her story.

"Randall thought he recognised one of our horses. Although the one he claims to have recognised never left the stable the night. But Randall's word was enough for the English."

"So, you did help Jamie escape?"

Caitriona nodded her head. "I haven't been completely forthcoming yet, lass. Not for a lack of trying, there just hasna been a good time to tell ye. Ellen MacKenzie was my dear friend when I was here at Leoch. She was one of the people I found that I could trust and who understood my situation with Colum. I owe Ellen MacKenzie my life."

My brow furrowed. "Who is Ellen MacKenzie?"

"Why, Column's sister and Jamie's mother, o' course. I thought ye woulda known since yer stayin' in her old room."

"What?" I gasped, nearly falling over. Suddenly, it made sense. It made sense why Jamie knew to come to this room and why he knew which floorboard to lift. I somehow felt worse knowing that I was keeping him from the room that once belonged to his mother.

But then the first part of what she said to me hit me like a ton of bricks. "You mean that Jamie is . . . " I couldn't bring myself to finish the sentence. I furrowed my brow. "He's . . . "

"Column's nephew, aye," Caitriona responded as she got up and stood beside the fireplace, running her fingers over the initials carving. "And Dougal's," she finished with a shrug.

I stood up and slowly exhaled a breath before I began pacing the floor, rubbing my lower back. "But Dougal's so . . . so mean to Jamie. Although, mean does seem rather tame of a word to use in this situation."

"Noticed that have ye? Dougal's scairt Colum will name Jamie as his successor to lead the clan. Fair number of MacKenzies would support young Jamie should he ask for their fealty. It would lead to a bloodbath within the clan."

I was going to ask why Dougal would fear such a thing. But I realized that with Hamish as young as he was and with Colum's condition, Clan MacKenzie was bound to need someone to lead them.

The puzzle pieces continued to fall together. No wonder most of the womenfolk hardly said a word to me. Not only was I not Scottish, I was a stranger, in the arms of a handsome man, who could potentially be their chieftain. In their minds, I had taken his attention off any single woman would might desire to move up in ranks. I was doomed.

Perhaps I should just leave. Although I was never one to run from a challenge. I met them head-on. Besides, Colum had offered me a position that I was interested in and one that would suit me. Although, if I wasn't careful I could be accused of witchcraft. Or I could go . . . home.

Home. The word seemed foreign to me now. Caitriona could surely help me get back. If I wanted to go. But there was nothing there for me. Also, I had a feeling that Caitriona hadn't yet shared everything concerning Stephen Sr. I walked closer toward her, with my arms folded across my chest. The clicking of my boots and the crackling of the fire were the only sounds in the room.

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked, stopping in front of her. "You were here and went home, had a family and then came back. Your family thinks you're dead. Clearly, I'm missing something. What is it?"

"I was heartbroken when Colum married Letitia," Caitriona whispered. "The thought of seeing him every day with her was too much for me. Colum--Colum had asked me to be his mistress. He said he'd care for me and that I would always be welcome at Leoch. Before he married her, I-I thought that maybe I could live like that. I went along wi' it for a time . . . before the marriage. Ellen knew. . ."

My brow furrowed. Caitriona wasn't fully making sense. I was trying to follow her story, but they were like strings being woven in a tapestry. On their own, they didn't make sense. But hopefully, altogether, they would. So, I let her continue.

"I couldn't stay. And there was only one other place for me to go. Ellen helped me get back to the stones. She knew the truth about me. But that knowledge died with her."

So, Ellen was dead. Jamie's mother was dead.

Caitriona raked her fingers through her hair and fell onto a stool. "Of course, I was a disgrace to my parents. To them, I was ruined . . . and crazy." She glanced down at the ground and shook her head. "There weren't many bidders for me," she scoffed darkly. "Stephen Arbuckle Sr. was the only man who even looked my direction because I could give him one thing, an heir to help improve his already vast fortune."

Tears were beginning to run down her cheeks. Unable to hold any grudge I held moments before, I knelt before her and held her hands. "I didn't marry for love either, lass," Caitriona sniffled. "But the way you talk about my son, I know you cared for him. You did love him. You loved my son in a way I was never able to love Stephen Sr."

"Why?" I asked. I had a feeling I already knew the answer. I had never felt at ease around Lottie and Stephen's father. I rarely spent time alone with him. I always made sure one of them was with me.

"Did you know he was married twice before me?"

I shook my head. Neither Lottie nor Stephen had ever said anything about it.

"His first wife drowned. The second wife poisoned."

My brow furrowed. "What?" I gasped.

"Accidents, they say. But I knew otherwise. When they couldn't give him what he wanted, a child . . ."

"No!" I didn't want to believe it. I couldn't believe it. But my gut told me that what she was telling me was true. After Stephen's death, I hadn't felt safe there anymore. As if I were simply biding my time until something were to befall me.

"He told me I wouldna live to see the morning," Caitriona whispered. "I–I wanted to take my children and run away with them. If I could go back and change things, I would. I'd have the butler distract him or somehow arrange for him to be needed on emergency business. But I didna have time to plan and it was the one night Stephen Sr. ever spent with the children. He wanted me to suffer. Seeing my children wi' him, knowing that I wouldna be part of their lives ever again."

She took a deep breath before continuing. "That night I fled. I knew the only place I'd be safe from him. The past."

I bit my bottom lip. "I–I suspected that I wasn't safe anymore with him," I whispered back to her. "I stayed in my room or stuck to Lottie like glue. With my fortune tied to Stephen's through marriage, it somehow reverted to him."

"Ye do understand."

I nodded my head. "I can't go back, can I?"

Caitriona arched an eyebrow quizzically. "Do ye want to?"

I sighed. "No, I didn't want to. But given what you've told me about Jamie and the mess I've made there. . . But maybe if I just stayed away from him . . ."

With a noise between a sob and a snicker, Caitriona raised my chin. "If there's one thing I ken about Highlander men, is once they've made their minds up to somethin' there's almost no changin' it."

My brow furrowed in confusion.

"Yeh've caught his eye, lass. Jamie's a good lad and he'll wear ye down, of that I'm certain. Likely willna take him much effort on his part."

"What about the other womenfolk?"

"Let 'em gripe. Jamie will keep ye safe. He'll make a fine husband, somethin' ye'll be needin'."

I grabbed my cross and played with it between my fingers. "You hardly know me and you're already trying to marry me off?"

Caitriona smiled sadly. "As much as I hate to admit it, this time isna kind toward women. A man will see to it that yer protected and cared for. Jamie will do ye better than that. I'm sure of it."

"But I hardly know him," I offered.

"Ye already know him more than many women do before they marry. Ye know that he's kind. . ."

"And stubborn," I added quickly. Caitriona arched an eyebrow in my direction. "And kind."

"Doesna hurt that he's rather handsome, aye?"

I blushed and tried to cast my gaze toward the floor. It was quite awkward to be talking about another man with your dead husband's mother. She lifted my chin once more and looked right at me.

Her hands clung to mine tightly. "Let me be the Naomi to yer namesake, Ruth. God provided a kinsman redeemer then and he'll do so now. I promise ye."

I nodded my head, unsure of what exactly I was getting myself into. But she was right about one thing. God provided then and he would now. Whether that was in the form of Jamie remained to be seen.

Author's note: All mistakes are my own (or my kitty Merlin's, mama's little helper lol) Sorry it's been so long. But a lot has been revealed in this chapter! Here's to hoping the next one comes sooner! :)