C H A P T E R    O N E
sʜᴇ's ғᴜᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ

     THE WIND howled through the trees, carrying flurries of snow that danced like ghosts against the darkening sky. Shiloh Munroe pulled her jacket tighter, her fingers digging into the worn material as she watched the sun begin to dip below the mountains, casting an orange glow over the thick, snow-laden pines. She shifted her weight, her breath puffing out in white clouds as she glanced at Sam and Chris beside her. The cold bit at her cheeks, and she fought the chill creeping into her bones.

     The cable car station provided no comfort, a lonely structure against the sprawling, frozen landscape. Its metal frame creaked, protesting the weight of snow piling up on its roof. Shiloh's heart pounded in time with the groaning wind, her gaze fixed on the cable line stretching into the sky, disappearing into the shrouded peak of Blackwood Mountain.

     The cable car was coming toward them painfully slow. Shiloh glanced at it, wishing they were already up the mountain, surrounded by the warmth of the lodge's fire instead of the biting cold. She knew Josh needed everyone there tonight—needed them for the prank. A cruel prank they had planned together. But the idea of reliving those memories, seeing the place where it all went wrong, where her life had changed forever, made her skin crawl.

     She truly hoped that tonight would go as planned—that they'd pull off the prank without anyone falling victim to whatever had spared her from the fate of the Washington twins.

     Sam was the first to break the silence. "It's beautiful, isn't it?" Her voice was soft, tentative. She was staring at the view, her eyes reflecting the dying sunlight.

     Shiloh tried to smile. "Yeah. Beautiful." The word felt heavy on her tongue. It was the same mountain, the same trees, the same cable car. But everything felt different in the snow, like a shadow lingering just out of sight.

     "It's weird, right?" Chris said, breaking the silence. "Josh wanting us all back here."

     "He says it's to distract him," Shiloh replied quietly. "He thinks if we all come back, it'll make things easier."

     Sam's eyes met Shiloh's, her expression a mix of sympathy and concern. "And you're sure you're okay with this? Coming back?"

     Her stomach twisted. She'd been thinking about it since they got Josh's invitation. She remembered the way he'd sounded in the video—hopeful, almost desperate. Josh wanted everyone to return, to relive the good times, to pretend things hadn't changed. But beneath that, Shiloh knew the truth. He wanted them there to witness the prank, to pay for what they'd done to his sisters.

     And she would do anything for Josh. After everything that happened, she owed him that much. That's why she'd agreed to be an accomplice in his cruel plan.

     But standing there now, the weight of last year pressing down on her shoulders, she felt the unease settle deeper. She could still hear the screams. Hannah's, Beth's, her own. Could still feel the cold, the terror as she slipped, as they fell together into the white void below. Her scars from the fall seemed to burn at the memory.

     She was still haunted by the guilt of being the only one to make it back.

     Shiloh shrugged, looking away. "I promised Josh I'd be here. He needs us."

     The distant hum of the cable car reached her ears, and she spotted its shape emerging through the falling snow. It was like a ghost gliding toward them, slowly becoming more real as it approached. Sam nudged her shoulder playfully, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. "You're a good friend, Shy."

     She forced a smile back, holding no grudge against the two blondes. They weren't a part of it, they didn't deserve any of her anger. "Yeah. I try."

     As the cable car pulled into the station, the metal groaned against the wind, and a blast of cold air whipped through Shiloh's hair. The doors slid open with a mechanical hiss, and the three of them stepped inside, the warmth of the cabin enveloping them instantly. She settled into one of the seats, staring out the window as the doors shut and the car began its ascent up the mountain.

     Outside, the sun dipped lower, casting long shadows over the snow-covered forest. Shiloh's reflection in the glass stared back at her, pale and tense. She knew this trip wouldn't be easy, but for Josh, she'd push through it.

❆

     They weren't the last to arrive. Emily, Mike, and Jess were still making their way up the trail. Josh met them halfway down the path, greeting the trio with a large smile before pulling Shiloh into a bone-crushing hug.

     It had been a little under a month since they'd last seen each other, everything finally in place for their revenge. Shiloh hadn't come to the lodge since winter began—hadn't wanted to see the landscape where she had nearly died. Instead, they had been hanging out elsewhere, planning and preparing for tonight's cruel prank. Now, it was time to put their plan into motion.

     When the pair separated, Chris' voice echoed from behind her. "Man, I feel like this mountain gets bigger every time I climb it."

     Josh chuckled at his friend, his hand still lingering on the small of Shiloh's back as she turned to face their friends. "Oh, yeah? Feels the same to me."

     The blond scoffed, "C'mon, you grew up here. It probably feels like it's shrinking."

     The eldest Washington nodded, a smile on his lips. "I guess that's true."

     Shiloh couldn't help but agree; she hadn't grown up on the mountain like he had, but in a years time the peak of Blackwood Mountain had gone from enormous to suffocating. She didn't want to be back, if it were up to her, she would never have returned after ending her seven month search for the twins. The events of that night—the growls, the screams—it all still haunted her nightmares. Flashes of her near-death experience flickering behind her eyelids every time she blinked.

     She was brought forth from her thoughts when Chris' voice reached her ears once more. "When're you gonna install some cell towers up here? I'm gettin' withdrawals already."

     The brunette snorted, answering before Josh could. "Got an extra million lyin' around?"

     "Funny you should say that," he pretended to check his pockets. "Ah, I think I left it in my other jacket."

     Josh and Shiloh chuckled as they began making their way up the path, "Oops."

     When they walked through the waist-high wooden gate, Josh waved at a freezing Ashley and a very clearly pissed-off Matt. "Hey, guys. Get up here okay?"

     Ashley nodded, "Yeah." She briefly glanced to their friend's brooding form, "Well... more or less. But it's so good to see you!"

     Shiloh looked at Matt, slight concern in her eyes before she turned to her beanie-clad friend. "What's up with him?"

     The girl sent her a tight-lipped smile, her gaze holding a look that screamed 'it's not my place'. The brunette simply nodded, understanding that it probably had something to do with Emily.

     Even though she'd distanced herself from her friends and brother, going as far as moving out merely weeks after the twins' disappearance, she'd still kept tabs on them. She wanted to keep them at an arms length, while also masking her distance under the ploy of PTSD. They needed to believe that she was simply coping, that she held no despise in her heart for them, that she still viewed them as friends.

     So, she was well aware of the relationships that had fallen apart—and the ones that had formed from the debris of teenage heartbreak. When Mike and Emily broke up, she had heard all about it; it happened before she'd moved out, when she didn't have a choice in listening to her brother's infuriating voice.

     And, after brief, five-minute conversations with him, she'd become aware that he and Jessica had begun dating.

     The drama that would soon unfold was going to be quite the shit show.

     The group made their way to the door, Josh's voice reaching their ears from in front of them. "Dammit... this freaking thing..."

     "What's up?" Shiloh asked, pulling her jacket tighter around her body as the chill of the mountain began to creep further into her bones.

     "It's iced?" Chris asked from beside her, earning a nod from their friend.

     "What else?"

     The brunette shrugged, leaning side-to-side on the pads of her feet. "Maybe there's another way in?"

     "There's a million ways in, they're just all locked." Josh said with a subtle shake of his head, analyzing the frozen lock before him.

     Their blond friend sighed, turning his head to look around, "There's gotta be, like, a window around the corner we can get, like... get open, or something."

     The green eyed Washington leaned back, looking at the boy over his shoulder. "Wait a second, are you saying we should break in?"

     "I don't think it's technically breaking in if you own the place, right?" Chris inquired, tilting his head to the side.

     "Hey. Not if I don't report you," Josh joked, turning to face him. He waved his arm ahead of them, "Lead the way, Cochise."

     Chris nodded, turning and starting down the stairs. In his absence, Josh placed his hand on Shiloh's back, catching her attention. He could see the hesitancy in her eyes, the anxiety that came with returning to the lodge; he understood, and he was beyond thankful that she'd come despite her uncertainty.

     "You gonna be okay?" He asked, his voice soft as their gazes met.

     Her breath hitched at the look in his eyes, bleeding with compassion and something that resembled love. Even after months of receiving that look from him, she still found herself breathless.

     Something had shifted in their dynamic throughout the past year. Aside from becoming partners in crime, they'd grown impossibly closer. Shiloh had been there for him after every therapy session, and vice versa. She'd been there to hold him late at night, when his medicine had seemed to fail him and he needed an anchor to reality. He'd practically become her unofficial roommate with all the nights he'd spend in her spare bedroom. They'd come running at each other's call, holding each other as they broke down.

     Shiloh nodded, gulping before responding. "Y-Yeah. Just... can't wait for this night to be over."

     If they weren't so close, she would have filtered her words, would have lied and said she was just antsy from being on the mountain again. But she knew that he wouldn't be offended, she'd expressed her feelings about the location many times before.

     Josh smiled softly at her, pulling her into a gentle hug. "Thank you. For coming, despite everything." His voice was muffled in her hair, but she heard him loud and clear.

     Her arms wrapped around him, her voice reassuring as it vibrated against his shoulder. "I'd do anything for you, you know that."

     "Hey, lovebirds!" Chris called from the end of the stairs, catching their attention and causing them to slowly retreat from the embrace. "Come on!"

     They rolled their eyes, the mask of a playful grin decorating their lips. Josh gave her hand a reassuring squeeze, before leaving to help their friend get inside the lodge.

❆

     The lodge was dark, almost haunting, as they entered. The furniture seemingly frozen in time, the ghostly memories echoing through her mind as she analyzed her surroundings. She felt as if the couches were mocking her, taunting her for sitting on them a year ago. Shiloh felt stupid, glancing briefly to the couch she'd sat on after her argument with her brother, the flash of Hannah's camera blinding her before Beth had sat down beside her.

     It'd only been a year, but the memory felt like a lifetime ago. Things were so drastically different now—she was different, now. Her once vibrant soul now polluted by trauma and survivor's guilt.

     "Home, sweet home." Josh's voice echoed through the lobby, arms extended as he walked ahead of them.

     "Sweet is not the word I'd use," Matt said, dragging his and Emily's luggage into the building.

     Shiloh nodded in agreement, Ashley's voice ringing out soon after. "Oh my gosh, it's so good to be inside. Even if it's still kinda freezing in here."

     "I'll get a fire going," Josh smiled, making his way to the large fireplace.

     "This place barely looks any different," Matt observed, having discarded the luggage by the door. He started walking around, noting every detail that seemingly hadn't been tampered with since last February.

     Josh shrugged, crouched down by the fireplace. "Nobody's been up here."

     "Even with all the police coming in and out?"

     Chris looked at the beanie-clad girl. "Not a lot of action up here lately."

     "Nope." Josh confirmed, steely blue eyes glancing briefly to Shiloh's nervous form. She looked so fragile, expertly hiding the darkness that brewed beneath her skin—a darkness that nearly mirrored his own.

     She'd even jumped at the loud voice that boomed through the doorway. "What's up, party people!"

     "Hey," Jess greeted as she entered behind Mike, her braided pigtails harboring flecks of snow as she sashayed to the couch. Her presence infuriated Shiloh; she despised the way the blonde acted as if she were innocent, as if she had a right to do what they'd done.

     The brunette glared at her brother, feigning a kind smile as the couple made their way further inside. "Hey."

     Matt looked up, seemingly just as unhappy to see the male Munroe as she was.

     "Make yourself at home, bro." Josh greeted, and she admired his ability to hide his madness. She wished she could put on a mask just as convincing, but she was stuck under the ploy of her hesitancy being caused by PTSD.

     "Will do."

     "Yeah," Matt started, standing from his spot and approaching the class president. "Come on in. Take a load off. Have whatever you want. You just take whatever you want anyways, right?"

     Mike seemed confused by his friend's hostile energy, furrowing his brows as he replied. "Woah. Easy there, cowboy."

     "What the hell were you doing with Em out on the trail?"

     Shiloh's eyes widened at this, entirely unaware that the former couple were now on talking terms. "What?"

     He glanced briefly to his sister, pointing at her for a moment. "I second that. What?"

     "I saw you and Em. Through the telescope." Matt was clearly seething at whatever it was he'd seen, and she couldn't really blame him. They were all friends before everything, yeah, but seeing those two alone on the trail after such a disastrous break up would ensure confusion and anger for anyone.

     Ashley looked uncomfortable, shifting in her seat. Shiloh had realized that the girl was probably present for the discovery, maybe even responsible, and quickly understood her earlier reluctance to tell her what had upset Matt.

     Mike, ever the prick, opened his arms in exaggeration. He clearly didn't understand Matt's concern. "Before? We just ran into each other. It'd been a while, so we just hugged, and I said hello. Is that against the law?"

     "Mike—" His sister began, only to be cutoff by their athletic friend.

     "Right. Yeah." He rubbed the side of his neck, looking away from the brown eyed boy in front of him. "Duh. Sorry, it's been kind of a long day. I overreacted."

     The brunette waved his hand, "Nah, man. Don't worry about it."

     "We cool?"

     "Yeah, yeah. Totally." Mike waved him off, approaching his sister with open arms. "Hey, Shy!"

     She reluctantly returned the embrace, catching Josh's gaze on her left. He knew of the hatred that boiled in her soul, the despise she held for her older twin growing in intensity over the course of the past year.

     "Hey, Mikey." They separated, and she couldn't help but avoid his gaze, focusing on his eyebrows to make it seem as if she were looking into his eyes. "How've you been?"

     He shrugged, "Alright, I guess. How about you? Haven't heard much from ya these past few months."

     Shiloh nodded, taking a deep breath. "Yeah... Sorry about that. I've been so busy with work and therapy—"

     "It's okay," he cut her off with a friendly smile. "Just happy to know you're not dead."

     She fought a glare at his choice of words, smiling softly as she just laughed it off. "Yeah."

     With a nod, he left to join Jessica on one of the couches, wrapping his arm around her and connecting their lips just as Emily entered the lodge. "Oh, my God. That is so gross. Are you trying to swallow his face whole?"

     "Em—"

     "No, seriously. Can she be anymore obvious?" The ravenette asked, cutting her boyfriend off without a second thought. "No one wants in on your territory, honey."

     Shiloh stepped forward, ready to intervene if things escalated. She knew Mike wouldn't, his ego always inflated when girls would fight over him. Neither would Matt, having clearly become Emily's lap dog over the past year.

     "Excuse me, did you say something?" Jessica snarked, standing to her feet and approaching her former friend.

     "Oh, did you not hear me?" Emily asked, "Was your sluttiness too loud?"

     The blonde smiled, "Sounds like someone's bitter she didn't make the cut."

     "Yeah. It's all a big cattle call with that dreamboat. Congrats, you're top cow."

     "Cuts real deep calling Miss Homecoming a cow." Jessica shot back, her smile never faltering as she stepped closer to Emily.

     Shiloh rolled her eyes, "Shut the fuck up, both of you."

     "Jealous, much?" The blonde fired, her blue eyes finding the girl's small form in the darkness of the room. "When was the last time you even got laid, Shy?"

     "Shut the fuck up, Jessica." She snapped, her mask dropping momentarily to reveal her distaste for the homewrecker.

     Mike finally spoke, "Hey, leave her alone, Jess."

     The girl smirked, turning back to her boyfriend. "Whatever. I don't give a crap what you think."

     "At least she can think." Shiloh stated, surprisingly coming to Emily's defense.

     "4.0 bitch, honor roll." The ravenette chimed, "Suck on that when you're trying to sleep your way into a job."

     Shiloh laughed. She couldn't help it. She ignored the look her brother sent her, clearly irritated at the escalation as Jess fueled the fire even more. "Who needs grades when you've got all the natural advantages you can handle. You couldn't buy a moldy loaf of bread with your skanky ass."

     "She's the skanky one?" The brunette chimed, eyes wide and smile disbelieving. "Seriously? We're not gonna talk about how you're the one that slept with her boyfriend? Do you, just, not hear yourself?"

     "Y'know what, Shy?" Jess smirked, "How's therapy going? I highly doubt anyone's gonna want to sleep with damaged goods."

     "Bitch—" Shiloh lunged, all anxiety from the trip being replaced by pure anger. Josh was quick to his feet, running over to his best friend and wrapping his arms around her; she fought against his hold, determined to beat the shit out of the blonde before her. Her anger only grew at the girl's next words.

     Jessica turned to Mike, "She's fucking crazy!"

     "Let me go so I can show this bitch just how crazy I can get." She growled, still struggling against Josh as he lifted her from the ground.

     "Stop it!" He yelled, carrying her a few feet away from the girl. He placed her onto her feet, looking directly into her eyes. "This is not why we came up here," he reminded, the others oblivious to the underlying meaning in his words. His eyes tore away from her, looking around at their friends. "This is not... helping. It's not what I wanted. If we can't get along for ten minutes, then maybe we need a little bit of a break, right? Mike, why don't you go checkout the guest cabin, the one I told you about?"

     Mike nodded, standing from his seat. "Yeah, alright." His gaze landed on his sister, "Can I talk to you?"

     Shiloh scoffed, rolling her eyes as she followed him outside—making sure to shoulder-check Jessica on her way out.

     They exited the lodge, the dim glow of the porch light illuminating their unhappy faces. The snow had ceased falling, for now, the dark secrets of the forest bringing zero comfort to the shorter twin as she spun to face him. "What?"

     "What the hell was that?" He asked, motioning inside. "Taking Em's side? Seriously?"

     She rolled her eyes, "What the fuck did you expect, Mike? That I'd stand by and let the girl you cheated on get attacked by your newest whore?"

     "Don't call her that—"

     "Why?" She asked, obsidian eyes glowing with despise. "It's the truth! Funny how you stand up for her but not your own damn sister."

     "I did stand up for you!"

     "Oh, I'm sorry! Yeah, cause your pathetic attempt at telling her to leave me alone totally saved the day." She sarcastically laughed, "You haven't changed one damn bit."

     Mike scoffed, "What the hell is wrong with you, Shy?"

     "What's wrong with me?" She snorted, "You're seriously asking me that? How about the fact that I almost fucking died trying to clean up the mess you and everyone else made? How about the fact that my own brother still hasn't apologized for almost killing me!"

     "That wasn't my fault!"

     "Wasn't it?!" Shiloh yelled, her lethal gaze burning into his soul, igniting any semblance of regret he held. "You could've said no when they suggested it. Why didn't you? Hm? Did you just want to see, yet, another girl cry because of your pitiful ass? How much of a fucking narcissist are you, Michael?"

     For once in their nineteen years of existing, Shiloh had won. Mike was rendered speechless, unable to think of rebuttal. He knew she was right, and it killed him. He hadn't apologized to her, he'd just went back to acting as if nothing had changed—as if he hadn't almost lost her.

     Josh cleared his throat from the doorway, Jessica standing a few feet ahead of him with her arms crossed and a stupid smirk plastered on her lips. The blue eyed man made his way past her, placing his hand on the small of Shiloh's back. "C'mon, the fire's almost ready."

     She didn't miss the brief glare he sent Mike, but the older Munroe was as oblivious as usual as Josh plastered a smile onto his lips. "You guys be safe."

     With a nod, Mike took Jessica's hand and lead her down the stairs. "Will do. Hey, Josh?"

     "What's up?"

     He glanced at Shiloh's retreating form, the anger radiating off of her as she delved further inside. "Keep her safe, okay?"

     "Always."

❆

     Josh and Shiloh sat in silence, gazing into the flame before them. Their friends had retreated to different parts of the lodge; Sam going to take a bath, Matt and Emily going back down the trail in search of her bag, and Chris and Ashley off to find a Ouija board.

     She hadn't said much since her argument with her brother, rebuilding her fragile facade in silence. Thankfully, her friends had believed that her change of demeanor was a result of Jessica's words, only Josh having witnessed the entire quarrel with Mike.

     He needed to be in earshot, needed to ensure that she didn't accidentally slip up, to be there to pick up the pieces of her soul if it were to break in the aftermath. He had to be there for her, it wasn't even an option.

     "I almost let you kill him." Josh muttered, his tone soft and playful as it broke through the silence. He watched her in his peripherals, smiling softly at the grin that graced her lips.

     Shiloh held her knees tighter against her chest, leaning her head on his shoulder. "I would've thanked you." She took a deep breath, "Why'd you intervene?"

     He sighed, laying his head comfortably against hers. "On any other day, I would've watched you kill him while munching on some popcorn... but we have bigger things to focus on, tonight, Shy."

     She nodded, "I'm sorry I lost my cool."

     "Don't worry about it," he smiled. "It's not you I'm pissed at. You needed to let that out."

     With a smile, she removed her head from his shoulder, meeting his gaze for the first time since Mike had left. His breathing seemed to pause at the look in her eyes, the same look he held when he looked at her; she resembled an angel, the orange glow of the fire emphasizing her ethereal features. "Thank you."

     "Of course, Shy." He mirrored her expression, his voice barely above a whisper as he draped his arm across her shoulders.

     Their eyes flickered to each other's lips, a wordless conversation taking place in the glow of the flame before them. Every unspoken feeling, every hidden thought, was being brought to light—the feelings they'd been running from for years bleeding out through their eyes.

     "Josh—"

     "Hey, Josh?" Sam's voice startled them, causing the pair to jump in their spot and turn to face her. She chuckled, sending her friends an apologetic smile, "Sorry... but no hot waters kind of a major oversight, don't ya think?"