Background : She wants to throw it all away with one word.."Obliviate."  TW: no mentions of suicide but similar themes. Written in Draco Malfoy's POV. 

"I don't want to know anymore." a whisper echoed around the walls, seeming to come from nowhere but everywhere at the same time. Whispers followed pursuit, multitude after multitude. It was mocking her, laughing her off. The worst part about it was it was her tone. Her voice.

"I get it", I muttered straying beside her. I rose an eyebrow as she looked agape. She was red faced, tears strewn down her face. She hiccuped.

I noticed the wand in her hand. It had a blue hue. I hated the hue. All the same, I savored it.

"I'm not going to stop you, if your expectant. I'm sure you knew well though, I have the same strange addiction as you do."

"It's not an addiction!" A shriek erupted from her lungs, like it was torn out from her throat.

I picked at my cuticles, scoffing. "It will be, Granger?" When she opened her mouth indignantly, only to find no words coming out, I finished for her. " Needn't an answer. " I bit out. "This messed up world is always going to be incorrigible. " I lifted my eyes to hers. "It will be an addiction, until you can't stop it, because there will always be something to hate, some person that causes you to want to throw it all away. It's inevitable. "

Inside, I want to smirk at the wreckage I would be causing. Nothing but snarky and cold harsh words. No underlying gentleness, but she knew that. She knew who I was, and the pain she would be going through once she sought to relieve herself. Things did more harm them good these days. But I'll let her have the false security. It'd be quite fun, watching someone go to the same limits of myself. Messed up and a downright bastard, I was. 

"How dare you!"

I watched as anguish stole her features, and she gripped her wand, pointing it at me.

I rose an eyebrow. She was an incorrigible, stubborn ruthless brat. We both were, but at least I had some dignity not to lie to myself. I wouldn't lie about the times I've said Obliviate to take it all away. But there was still the same monstrosity of magic on my arm, but now I know that makes the whole ordeal even better. I'll give her the same shuckery. And because she was a prideful, not-going-down in a fight gryffindor, her stubbornness would be her downfall. In the end, it'll be herself that's her true nemesis, not me.

I wrapped my hands around hers, ours tied around her wand together. I wanted to swallow down the last bit of guilt that rose within me, the guilt that my mother would say was being sorry. I want to say that's a lie to, but I know better then anyone that what mother said to me was the only depth of truth and realism. Guilt can be salvation if used at the right time. I closed my eyes, but they were twitching.

"Go on. Say it - Obliviate."

I didn't put much power beneath the words.

Only in my thoughts lied the revelation. It was like forbidden fruit, you'd never stop to think it's really poison when it's hanging on a tall, proud and green tree. But in my case, the tree had wilted. All the leaves have fallen off the branches, the wind had gusted it away. It was the only thing that could be seen to the public eye, as it started rotting and showing it's true bitterness.Yes, it had to be obvious to her by now. Her body was long frozen in shock, I looked down to see our hands still pressed down upon each others, the skin I could see underneath my palm was pink and slowly turning bruised. But neither of us did anything. Said anything. The spell was on both the tip of ours tongues, but wouldn't dare touch the air.

"When a person becomes guilty, remorse follows. And where remorse follows , comes change."

Mother's voice stuck into my head, and it was the only thing that was heard in the moment. All was silent, but the voices in our heads were too loud. I had some feeling to care. Whether that was a good thing was up on question, and many more drifted back and forth as I watched her gaze. My skin suddenly felt hot, and I wanted to shrink back down into my skin. I felt like a small child, and mortification presumed as I felt wet, sticky tears pool in my eyes.

She was scrutinizing me. Confusion gathered her features before a look of tentative thinking took her up again. No doubt the voices in her head were loud , louder than mine.. She was smarter, wittier, always had been. She was ruined, no doubt, but she knew who she was. More panic consumed me, and my breathing amplified. If it was not for the hilarity of the situation I would be three steps ahead, none at all back. I struggled to block my mind, but occlumency is a flimsy prick. Whether or not Hermione Granger was a legilimens, I didn't know, but I wouldn't put it past her.

First Dumbledore, and now her.

I knew I was hyperventilating by now. The word took me far away, but I could faintly feel her numb fingers intertwined with mine. Dumbledore, lashed around in my head until my surroundings whiplashed back around me, and it didn't fully catch up to me until I realized several tears were strewing down my face.

Again, I was on the urge of obliviating myself. My hands shook with hers as the thought made a wedge in my head that Granger and I had the same fears. Granger and I had the same hates. Granger and I weren't so different.

Granger and I both liked to lie to ourselves.

All thoughts disintegrated on my tongue as I heard her drop the weight of our hands, causing the wand to hit the floor with an sobersome hit and the blueish hue to deteriorate.

Her hand hovered on to mine once more, but this time no wand was a barrier. This time everything was opened and unguarded, raw. For the first time in a long while, everything seemed real. There wasn't any more anguish.

Just recognition.

"I hate myself, too." 

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