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DRESS
(( — DEAD POETS SOCIETY — ))

—chapter iv: of annuals and secret societies

AFTER LUNCH THE BOYS and loraine had met up at the courtyard. they had quickly explained to her, how neil had found the old annual and had stumbled upon, what seemed to be, a secret club of some sort. due to the fact that loraine, even if she was a student, had to sit at the teachers table, she had missed all that had been discussed by the boys.

after they had agreed on asking keating about the annual, the group quickly noticed him walking over the grass.

"sir?" neil called, but keating just ignored him. "oh captain, my captain?" he tried again.

keating turned around. "gentlemen, ms nolan" he greeted

"we were just looking in your old annual" neil passed the book to keating

"oh, my god" keating laughed "no, that's not me. stanley 'the tool' wilson" he kneeled down on the ground chuckling to himself

neil got down on his level "what was the dead poets society?"

keating turned around smiling mischievously. "i doubt the present administration would look too favorably upon that."

"why, what was it?"

"lady, gentlemen, can you keep a secret?"

the rest of the group kneeled down in the grass as well.

"the dead poets were dedicated to sucking
the marrow out of life. that's a phrase
from thoreau that we'd invoke at the beginning of each meeting. you see we'd
gather at the old indian cave and take
turns reading from thoreau, whitman,
shelley; the biggies. even some of our
own verse. in the enchantment of the moment we'd let poetry work its magic" he looked between the boys and loraine like he had told them his biggest secret, which he probably had.

knox raised his brows, not entirely impressed "you mean it was a bunch of guys sitting around reading poetry?"

"no, mr overstreet, it wasn't just guys" keating shook his head "we weren't a greek organization, we were romantics. and we didn't just read poetry, we let it drop from our tongues like honey"

charlie looked at loraine, who seemed to be watching every move keating made attentively, and in the boys eyes, she was never more beautiful than in the moments she was thinking hard about something.

she would squeeze together her eyebrows, bite down the lower lip, which would often leave marks, as charlie noticed, and twirl her hair around a finger. but not in a suggestive way. more in a way of twirling it so long, that it would eventually get tangled and take her half an hour to brush through again.

loraine noticed his eyes and turned her head at him, smiling at charlie, he returned the gesture, before his attention was back on keating, scared he would turn red from the look she was giving him.

"spirits soared, women swooned, and gods were created, gentlemen, not a bad way to spend an evening eh?" keating passed the book back to neil and stood up "thank you mr. perry for this trip down amnesia lane. burn that, especially my picture." keating walked away whistling.

the bells started ringing and loraine could see mr hager open the door. the group started walking in the direction of the entrance.

"i say we go tonight" said neil

"tonight?" charlie repeated, like he hadn't heard him correctly

"what about my father?" asked loraine, hinting at the fact that he would surely hear them sneaking out

"don't worry, lori. we will take care of that" neil assured. loraine sent an unsure look in charlie's direction

"wait a minute" cameron interrupted, but before he could explain his concerns, pitts had interrupted him

"where's this cave he's talking about?"

"it's beyond the stream, i know where it is" neil turned towards loraine "we've often been there as children"

"yeah!" loraine nodded "you're right, i remember"

"that's miles" pitts argued

"it's not that far" loraine shook her head and smiled at pitts "i promise it isn't"

"sound boring" cameron shrugged his shoulders, walking behind the others

"don't go" charlie turned around from in between neil and loraine, hissing at cameron. loraine had to hold in her laughter

"you know how many de—merits we're talking, dalton?"

"so don't come, please" charlie repeated

"look" cameron tried to reason "all i'm saying is that we have to be careful, we can't get caught"

"no shit, sherlock" charlie rolled his eyes "as if anyone one of us would be able to come back from that"

"do you think i would survive another day if i got caught?" loraine asked sarcastically. cameron quickly shook his head

"you boys there! hurry up! ms nolan, you are not an exception to the rules" hager called from the door

neil turned around, ignoring the man and facing his friends. "all right, who's in?" he looked between them expectingly

"come on, neil, hagers right—"

"forget hager, no. who's in?"

"i'm in" charlie smiled

"i'm warning you, move" hager called from the door. loraine looked at her teacher in panic and then back at neil.

"me too" cameron agreed

loraine bit her lip, thinking "i can't believe i'm saying this, but i don't know, neil. there's so much to lose" neil's eyes grew softer as they fell upon the girl he had know since they had been children.

"just trust me on this, please lori"

loraine turned to look at charlie, as if to hear his opinion. "if we get caught, i'll say i made you come"

"charlie" loraine laughed, shaking her head at his ridiculous suggestion "fine guys, i'm in" charlie and neil broke out in cheers, charlie spinning the girl in his arms.

"i don't know neil" pitts finally pitched in again

"pittsie come on" charlie reasoned. his hand intertwined with loraine's as she came to a halt from his spinning.

meeks shook his head "his grades are hurting charlie"

"you can help him meeks" neil suggested

"what is this, a midnight study group?" pitts asked concerned

neil just shrugged. "forget it pitts, you're coming. meeks, are your grades hurting too?"

"i'll try anything once" the boy smiled sheepishly

"except sex" charlie joked and quickly earned himself a slap and scolding by loraine.

"i'm in as long as we're careful" cameron agreed

the group started running, now finally trying to make it into the building on time.

"what about you, knox?" charlie asked, when him, knox and loraine were the only people left outside.

"i don't know charlie"

"come on, even i said yes" loraine smiled and charlie nodded his head eagerly

"it'll help you get chris" charlie promptly said. loraine send him a warning glance.

"yeah? how?"

"women swoon!" charlie laughed, holding up his hand that loraine was still holding, as if to back up that statement. he dragged her into the building behind him, leaving knox stranded at the door.

"but why do they swoon?" loraine could faintly hear the boy call. "charlie, tell me why they swoon! charlie!"

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THE BOYS AND LORAINE were sitting in the library, a map laying on the table between them.

"you're not listening" whispered neil "look you follow the stream to the waterfall. it's right there. it's gotta be like—"

"i don't know guys" cameron muttered "it's starting to sound dangerous"

"don't worry" loraine bend over charlie to point at the map. charlie's cheeks turned reddish as she nearly sat on his lap. "neil's right. look, it's right there. we just need flashlights and we'll be careful so no one will get hurt"

"if you're so scared, why don't you stay home?" asked charlie as cameron's face was still very much concerned, seeming like he didn't believe a single thing loraine had said. "if ray says it's fine, it's fine"

"for gods sake stop chattering and sit down" hager scolded from the front of the room. loraine softly pulled down at charlie's collar, to drag him back down. he had gotten a bit out of his seat at cameron's words. "it's fine" she assured him, noticing that he was trying to defend her once again.

the boys groaned internally, before they sat down. neil took a spot next to todd, who still wasn't convinced he was gonna follow through with the group.

charlie's and loraine's hands found each other under the table as she returned to her book. she had already finished her homework, charlie was more of the kind to delay it until the last minute. he watched her eyes wander the page, before he too, returned to his work.

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AFTER THE STUDENTS had been dismissed, loraine had taken a quick shower and braided her hair. after that she had made her way into the teachers quarters, where she knocked at the first door.

"loraine" thomas said surprised at the sight of his sister "i did not expect you to come see me so quickly"

normally when the siblings would fight, it would take a few days for loraine to cool off, before she could talk things over. thomas always left her that space, in this field, she was more like their mother. quite a temperamental woman, who often spook her mind. maybe too often. in some ways loraine and thomas fought like their parents used to do.

"can i come in?" she asked cooly, ignoring her brothers surprise.

"sure" thomas stepped to the side, allowing his sister to enter, before his eyes made a quick motion across the hall. dalton wasn't in sight. "where is your boyfriend?"

he returned to his table and asked loraine with a simple gesture if she wanted a cup of tea. she nodded and thanked him as he pushed the cup towards her.

she took a gentle sip before she replied. "charlie isn't my boyfriend"

"the circumstance that you know who i'm talking about, without me having to mention a name, says a lot about you" he paused, raising his eyebrows at her "and quite frankly also about the nature of your relationship"

"i don't appreciate those jabs at charlie, tommy"

"oh, we're back to nicknames, lori?"

anyone with a sane mind could've sensed the underlying tension of the situation. loraine took a deep breath, before she turned serious. "what you said that evening" she paused, unsure what she really wanted to ask "did you mean it? that women were only born the be mothers? that i was only born to be a mother? do you think that's all i'm fit for?"

thomas shook his head hesitantly. "what i said was just to hurt you, i didn't actually mean it"

loraine could feel relieve enter her body

"you know that i don't have the same views as father, but i'm sorry that i compared our futures, that was unfair. even if i don't get to choose, i still have a chance, you've never been granted one in the first place"

"thank you thomas" loraine stood up and hugged her brother "i shouldn't have said a lot of things i said to only hurt you. you're not like them, but for a short time, i actually thought you were. i'm sorry"

"it's alright" thomas muttered. "so am i allowed to call you lori again?"

"of course" loraine laughed under tears

"you know, she'd be proud of you, right? do you remember what she used to say when father would once again say that women were only born to be mothers?"

loraine softly shook her head.

"she said women were born to think and to love, and one day they could choose to become mothers, because they were capable of choosing."

"i like that" loraine smiled "i remember so little about her, just the unimportant things. that she was the first to call me lori, sometimes i think i remember her voice, but i'm not sure"

"i wish i could help you, but i'm no woman" thomas said softly and loraine had to laugh.

"i never heard that before" she giggled and thomas heart grew light at the sound of his sisters laughter.

"just so you know: i don't think dalton is a jerk. he's alright i guess, as long as he treats you how he should treat you"

"father would never agree with him as my husband, doesn't matter how rich his parents might be"

"so he is your boyfriend? i didn't mention anything about getting married"

loraine's cheeks turned red. "stop tricking me into telling you things i don't want to"

thomas just shrugged and smiled mischievously. loraine's eyes fell onto the clock at the wall. "i'm glad we could resolve our fight, but i have to leave"

"okay? isn't it already past curfew?"

"yeah, but i have to finish a reading, and i don't want to go to bed too late"

"alright" thomas nodded as he watched his sister leave in a hurry. he wasn't sure if his eyes were tricking him, but for a short second it looked like someone else was in the hallway. someone with a long coat, brown hair and the sound of a second pair of feet, as the door was already closed and surely, more than one person deserted the hallway.