۫ ּ  ִ ۫   ˑ ֗ 𓏲˖ 𑁍 ࣪ ִ ۫ ּ  ִ ۫   ˑ ֗
࣪𓏲ּ ֶָ ✩◿𝓓𝓣𝓐◸ 🂱 ࣪𓏲ּ ֶָ
CHAPTER FIFTY-
epilogue

two months later
aspen, colorado

"Hey." Sarah stuck her head around the corner in Saint Mary's, staring into the classroom. "Guess what I brought you?"

"Please say graham crackers." Mr.Yamada stared hopefully from his new desk. Sarah grinned and held them up higher, making him drop his pen and put his arms above his head. "Yes, thank you!"

"I was told they were extra knowledgeable here." Sarah pointed to the side of her head knowingly, walking into the empty classroom. "Are they being nice to you?"

"They are, Mother. Thank you for asking." he hummed as she dropped them onto his desk and sat down. "That reminds me..."

Sarah gave a curious look as he reached under his desk and put a box on the table. "Happy birthday."

Sarah grinned widely as she looked at it. "I didn't wanna say anything this year to see who all would remember."

"And i did, so open." he encouraged her quickly as Sarah pulled the ribbon off and lifted the lid. "We picked it out last year for Christmas, but it didn't feel right giving it to you through the mail."

Sarah gave a soft smile as she held the charm bracelet in her hand, her thumb running across the baseball bat and glove. He pointed to the rest. "I added the rest of them."

It took her a moment to realize that along with the bat and glove, there was a pinball machine charm, a newspaper charm, a bandana charm, and a simple cup charm after Sarah had told him about the time she met Griffin. Sarah held it tightly in her hand. She felt that weight on her chest, feeling it in her eyes soon after. She looked up with a sad smile. "I love it. This....it just means so much to me."

"I know it does." he smiled, nodded her over. "Come on, i'll put it on you."

Sarah handed it to him, staring at both her wrist. One had Robins bandana, the other had Vance's bracelet. She stared at it with hesitation, frowning just a little. "One second."

He nodded as she undid the banana, getting in the middle of her hair and tying it off at the top, pulling a couple of the strands that were pulling out. "Better?"

"I'm impressed you did that without a mirror." he nodded, smiling as Sarah held her empty wrist out and let him clasp it tightly around her wrist. Sarah smiled at the cold of the charms, letting it hang there as the bell rung above them. "You better go get to class, we have a celebration tonight!"

Sarah smiled with a nod of her head. "See ya, Mr.Yamada."

"See ya." he said back to her as Sarah circled the door and headed into the crowded, hormonal filled hallway. She passed couples, passed friends, pasted enemies, past academic rivals. Non of them brought a reaction to her face like the boy at the end of the hallway did. Sarah was always relived to see Finney now, each day she woke up in fear he wouldn't show. When he did, it made every ounce of panic and anxiety wash away.

It took him a little longer to see her, still shorter even though he was finally moving up in the world. He smiled back at her once he found her, they both stopped at his locker as Sarah leaned against the one next to his, as he unlocked it. "Isn't it someones birthday today?"

He gave her a look of disbelief as Sarah put a dramatic finger on her chin and looked off in thought. "Is it...Gwen's birthday? No, no, no that's not right. No, of course! It's the presidents birthday! Duh, how could I forget?"

"The president?" he laughed with a dumb look.

"It's not his birthday either?" she gapped, shaking her head. "Man, I must be really bad with dates."

"Uh-huh." he pulled a ring pop from his locker and handed it to her.

"Now I remember." Sarah agreed as he shut it. "It's Meryl Streep's birthday! God, Finney, how could I forget that? She's secretly my Mom."

"Oh, is she secretly your Mom?" he rose his eyebrows and tightened his bag on his shoulders.

"Yes, she absolutely is." she agreed.

"I didn't know you were so famous." he put a hand on his heart. "Excuse me for not speaking with more respect and grace."

"Mm, yeah. I'll let it slide this one time." she nodded as they walked down the hallway together. Sarah pulled her bag around and dug into it before tossing it back behind her, she held the grape soda his way. "For you. It's very hot now because it's been sitting in my bag all day long, but I got it from the actual store instead of a machine. How sweet am I?"

"Tooth rotting sweet." he agreed, popping it into his bag. "Happy Birthday."

"That's who's birthday it is." she tossed her hands up and threw one of her arms around his shoulders. "Happy Birthday."

"What's Mr.Yamada planning for us?" he gave her a slightly scared look.

"I have no clue." she said honestly, letting him go as they neared the hallway where they were needed to part ways. "Wanna meet at the north or south doors before going to get Gwen down the street?"

"North?" he suggested.

"Cool." Sarah held her backpack on her shoulders more and took her turn, popping the ring pop on her finger. "Bye, Finney."

"Sarah?" he called to her. She looked over her shoulder questionably as she continued to walk. "Maybe....call me Finn?"

A questionable but supportive smile formed on Sarah's lips, nodding just once. "You got it."

He smiled, walking the other way as the both of them passed the raining windows, watching as it started to turn to snow.

Sometimes life didn't work out the way you want. Sometimes terrible things happen, sometimes it's completely unfair, sometimes everything you've ever known and loved gets ruined and fucked up for you. Sometimes who you love dies or they leave a hole in your heart. Sometimes life just completely sucks, but more times then non, there's a sliver of a silver lining somewhere in there. Sometimes, the things you hope for when you're young don't go the way you plan, but a small part of it always crawls to the surface.

Finn did ask Sarah to marry him a year later when he turned seventeen. She said yes but not in a marriage sense, in a 'let's be engaged for ten years' type of way. That marked the four year mark since Vance had been taken from her life. The four year mark they always told each other would be enough time to get over the other. He's been wrong, though. Because she didn't, there was no getting over, there was just moving on. And even then, it took her almost another two years, walking around with a ring on her finger, to finally come to that feeling of accepting that she'd always love Vance, but she could love someone else too.

So, they dated. After pinning after her since he was twelve years old, he finally had her. Sarah never saw him in that light until he turned eighteen and had laid across her apartment carpet, Bingo by his side, and looking down at the new space magazine. She really looked at him that day, on their birthday, and it just made sense then. Maybe it had for a while, but she didn't let herself come to terms with it because of the fear of loving anyone else.

Sometimes the universe could be gentle with you, sometimes it could show you the payoff of all the pain and suffering. Because, Sarah did feel happy. Most of all, she felt safe. She felt so happy, she knew this was where she belonged at, she knew that after all the suffering she faced, she deserved to be surrounded by people she loved so much, especially when they did nothing but love her unconditionally back. And the plan that she had in her head back when she was just a freshman in high school, the blurry face of who she married, finally did have a face.

For a while, it was one person, and then over time it was someone else. That was okay. Sarah didn't think it was at first, but it had been. Because she did get married to Finney Blake, and she was so fucking happy, deep down knowing Vance had found love again too, even if they'd been each other's first and always would have been. She was happy, she loved her life again, she actually looked forward to her future and waking up each day.

They did end up moving to California after school where Finn worked at Nasa and she succeeded with her internship, on her way to moving up toward being the best neurosurgeon in the state. They did get the green car, they did get the decent size house, and they did get the two kids. Gwen came with them until she ended up traveling the world, but Mr.Yamada stayed in Colorado to teach and be with his daughter, Amy. But, a month didn't pass without a visit.

Life worked out for them. It had its twist and turns, and the long term effect didn't just go away, it lingered on days worse then others where it got bad. But, in the long run, most of it did work out. Most days they were beyond happy, unconditionally bounded together through trauma but also nothing but love. It worked out, the world gave them another chance at happiness. Maybe it wasn't in the exact way they wanted, in a perfect world everyone they loved would still be alive and the trauma they had never would have happened, but it still somewhat fell into place in the end.

They were happy, and they were together. In the end, that's all that mattered to them, but also the five that watched over the pair every single day.

•

kylie speaks

woah.

i can't believe it's actually
over, i'm upset but i'm also
happy. sarah did get her happy
ending, she found peace in her
terrible world. i remember
someone had asked me to write
a heartbreaking book, and this
is what we got. i think i succeeded pretty well, but i also
am happy with my girls little
happy ending she got. i've loved
writing this book every second.
i loved creating sarah, i loved
getting to build up her relationship
with vance, i loved giving her so
many beautiful friendships, i
loved ONCE AGAIN projecting
onto finney too much, and i loved
all the comments and times we
all got to talk in the comments.
it's rare for me to be able to
write fifty chapters and not
get bored, but i never lost motivation for this one once. it
was a success, and it's moved up
to my top three books i'm most
proud of. thank you all for going through such a crazy
journey with my stupid little
book. i love you all so much. i do have two bruce fics in my drafts
that i am very happy to share
with you guys, and, SURPRISE
this won't be the last of sarah.
she's the mother in upcoming two books where you guys get to see her in the future as a mother in a couple chapters. i'll come back to announce it when it releases, but until then...

sarah and kylie out xx